Untitled

[The Gentleman Scamp]

I wrote this back in May for a magazine but never submitted it as I wasn't quite sure what point I was trying to make.

Retrieving it from my e-mail vault and re-reading it today, my views have changed a little to what they were.

What I've added today I've put in blue.

There is fear of commitment that affects many of us westerners, and no more so than in Thailand where the western man finds himself in a playground abundant with availability only experienced in the west by wealthy, popular adonises who look like they have stepped from the cover of GQ Magazine.

Most Thai girls in active relastionships are loyal to their boyfriends, fall in love quickly and see no reason why it can't continue till death do part. The majority of farang men who are young enough and scrub up well enough to recieve an alluring smile from a Thai female on the prowl are suckers for temptation, for it is a confidence boosting novelty. Handsome farang men are considered very handsome but often unobtainable, avarage looking men are suddenly handsome and unattractive men become so so.

This new found attention only seems to make us more fussy, and it is a trait of us farang, X as well as Y, to always be on the lookout for something better, whereas your avarage Thai girl will be content with what she has and will stick by her man, even if he farts in bed, embarrasses her in public or even gives into the temptation, which, in this fine land is all around us.

I've known western girls back home in England to be the same; afraid of commitment in case someone better turns up, an attitude which transpired from years of media saturation living in a society where magazines, pop videos and television subliminally govern our perception of what we want and how we must look and live to be accepted by the in crowd which is an elitist fantasy everybody wants to be part of, tell me if I'm I wrong.

Everything from Britney Spears to Sex And The City has created a world where romance isn't as cool as being a bitch. Secretly, we want romance, us guys just as much as the gals, but out here, unless we're retirees so many of us are to terrified to commit for a number of reasons and excuses... That we don't want a long distance reletionship after our holiday, that we don't feel ready to settle, but the real reason is that we don't want to feel entrapped because we like our freedom in this sexual candy store, and devotion just isn't challenging enough, we're used to working hard to keep our women back home because we have all that competition and back home it's a womans world and they call the shots. We don't want entrapment because last night we got the mobile number of a caramel skinned siren who had bigger tits, spoke better English and had longer legs. We get easily bored and become lazy with our Thai girlfriend and fond of her though we are, we often long for the freedom to go shopping for that perfect woman who we may never find but will have a whale of a time looking for. But we don't want to break any hearts doing it, and we start to feel like our ex-girlfriends back in our homeland... Those rejections we suffered that ended with that old line, "You're a really nice guy but I'm no good for you, we are better off as friends", when what she really meant was, "I'm out of your league, I always knew it and now I've met a guy who's made me the envy of all my friends as he is drop dead gorgeous, has a six figure income and a huge cock - take care". The Thai's know this of course, which is maybe why they are natuarally jealous, and the jealously only enforces our feelings of entrapment, and though we lose our interest in farang girls, we want them to know we're here because we like it here, not because we're sad tossers and it's the only place we can get laid which is often assumed yet is only the case for some.

The Thai's have a very different attitude to relationships which is one of the few things they are holding on to, though many westernised Thai girls who have lived overseas and hang with farang have been brainwashed by our culture and have become raven haired, caramel skinned farang themselves.

We love our own women back home but hate the culture which has robbed them of their femininity and we can't change the way things are, which seems to be that the beautiful ones have high standards and a good heart isn't at the top of their list, the avarage looking ones lack confidence and have high standards because they want to be like the beautiful ones and getting a man of beautiful standard would boost their confidence, and the less attractive and experienced ones seem to be the only ones that settle for love and they are often the happiest because they are not so fussy.

Out here pensioners also seem content, and so they should be with a girl a third of their age even if she does have a baggy stomach and buck teeth.

Then there's the second aphrodisiac - money, and Thai girls aren't as money orientated as people think, but money will always be an aphrodisiac to women of all colours and cultures wherever you go. As my father once pointed out, "No woman will ever be interested in you if you haven't got money", and he was right to an extent, but not completly, and that is actually more true in our culture than it is here and yet Thai girls have the reputation for being the gold diggers.

It all boils down to nature, because in the wild the female will go for the biggest male because he can provide for her and her young, or the male with the most attractive tail feathers or with the most impressive dance or the best fighter. Any male with these qualities is likely to have the most confidence which is the third and possibly the most important aphrodisiac.

We are, after all, merely animals underneath our Paul Smith T-Shirts and out D&G shades, and yet we try to deny it, we bullshit ourselves that inner beauty is the most important thing because we feel guilty toward the ugly or deformed, but the reality is that looks and wealth are important to a lesser or higher extent. Movies like Shallow Hal attempt to tell us otherwise but we all know it's a pile of crap in reality. It's rare, but romance can overcome a desire to be wealthy and examples of this are seen in the sucess of movies such as Far and Away and Titanic, but the reality of a young upper class woman falling for a lower class scamp is far from common, though it could be a situation I am in now - not that I'm lower class, just somebody with no financial security or stability which is probably why in the past I've only had brief flings with 'bad' girls as it's all I feel I'm worth.

But we should all go for the best deal we can get in life, whatever it is. It's not unnatural to do so.

Of course the Thai's are also obsessed with fashion and celebrity but to a slightly lesser extent, which by that rationale makes our culture the one which is lagging behind in today's modern world as our behaviour is closer to the animal kingdom. Maybe that isn't so true when you take into account the easily forgotten fact that in many ways, us, the farang, are the celebrity, and it's fashionable for the Thai's to be with a farang after years of looking up to the west as the white skinned sucess story of the planet which they saw as superior and therefore attractive. They wanted to be with us and nowadays they want to be us, and they're not far off from doing so. It'll be a sad day when Thai girls renounce their emancipation and become the hardened, supercool, ladettes like many of their foreign counterparts.

It's not easy to be a man in this day and age, and we are all affected by our culture in a very negative way. For the decent Thai girl, one of the saddest aspects of our society is that a relationship isn't nesscessarily for life, it may just be for six months, and that is something which has broken many a hopeful Thai heart. But we men, women, Thai and farang, who are not blessed with the looks we feel pressured to have - despair not, there is somebody for everybody, and the sooner we lower our shallow, Hollywood standards the sooner we'll be happy and settled.

I for one hope so anyway.

[RamdomChances]

I wasn't quite sure what point I was trying to make.

I'm not sure now!! can you summarise it into about 3-4 lines, my attention threashold is'nt what it used to be

Oh and you forgot to give it a title

[cdnvic]

Quite well written, although if it's intended for a non-thai publication you'll probably want to add in some explanitory blurbs to explain words and phrases alien to those who hadn't experienced Thailand yet (Falung, etc)

I made the same mistake submitting to a Malaysian mag before. Even though it was an english language publication, I was using alot of colloquial phrases that were in common use in Canada, but were jibberish to the magazine's audience.

Everything from Britney Spears to Sex And The City has created a world where romance isn't as cool as being a bitch.

Nice

You gonna submit it now?

cv

[Gazza]

Have to agree with RC. I only got as far as the second para.

Let us know when it gets made into a movie. I then may have the time to watch it.

[Pink Mist]

into the blog Scamp, you have a lot of talent use it

[GuestHouse]

Back in the cave man days a man took what he was capable of taking. The strongest got the best of the best.

Where do you get the time to make this stuff up?

Back in cave man days (aka Pre-history) , nobody wrote anything down - other than a few pictures on walls. So actually we have little or no idea what they did back in Cave man days.

We do know that people lived in social groups and that they took care of each other - several skeletal remains have been found where there is evidence of bone breakage and repair - so Some caveman/woman broke an arm and some other cave man/woman fed, cared for them and gave them the necessities of life until they were able to fend forthemselves (or the group).

So please stop beating the chest and think before you scribble such diatribe.

Ug Ug!

[tuky]

into the blog Scamp, you have a lot of talent use it

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

TGS, Bronco is right, this is a blog not a post/topic.

I am going to close this now, and urge you to start your own blog here atThaivisa Blog.

A lot of people are interested in what you have to say, so if you want to start an epic, please contact us as perhaps we can pin a URL to your blog here in general topics or similar. But otherwise please keep your posts a little more "on topic".

Thanks pal.