Why Do U Guys Do It?

[Changkok]

After reading countless threads on here about guys who marry thai girls then start supporting her family? why do you guys do it? its culture(not) right? to support the family but do they give you support back?

I am married to a thai girl and i would never send money to anyone in her family, if they want some money then come and cut my garden or something, earn it.

I guess some guys get blackmailed into it, if they dont give then the wife tells him he is no good!!

Im just curious to know why many guys do it?

[JetsetBkk]

Left a good job in the city

Workin' for the man every night and day

And I never lost a minute of sleepin'

Worryin' 'bout the way things might've been

Big wheel keep on turnin'

Proud Mary keep on burnin'

Trollin'

Trollin'

Trollin' on Thaivisa

[Changkok]

Left a good job in the city

Workin' for the man every night and day

And I never lost a minute of sleepin'

Worryin' 'bout the way things might've been

Big wheel keep on turnin'

Proud Mary keep on burnin'

Trollin'

Trollin'

Trollin' on Thaivisa

<deleted>?

[kmart]

After reading countless threads on here about guys who marry thai girls then start supporting her family? why do you guys do it? its culture(not) right? to support the family but do they give you support back?

I am married to a thai girl and i would never send money to anyone in her family, if they want some money then come and cut my garden or something, earn it.

I guess some guys get blackmailed into it, if they dont give then the wife tells him he is no good!!

Im just curious to know why many guys do it?

Because they ain't as smart as you, Stephen Hawking.

[bkkjames]

After reading countless threads on here about guys who marry thai girls then start supporting her family? why do you guys do it? its culture(not) right? to support the family but do they give you support back?

I am married to a thai girl and i would never send money to anyone in her family, if they want some money then come and cut my garden or something, earn it.

I guess some guys get blackmailed into it, if they dont give then the wife tells him he is no good!!

Im just curious to know why many guys do it?

If you managed to get to the point of marrying without having to have 'earned' the right, then you my friend are fast on your way to the hall of fame of the lifestyles of rich and shameless. Congrats.

[Changkok]

So im guessing from the responses i am getting that you guys support your missus famliy? Ok so tell me why you feel the need? im a curious guy.

[Maigo6]

Big wheel keep on turnin'

Proud Mary keep on burnin'

Trollin'

Trollin'

Trollin' on Thaivisa

Haha....

Very good.

[Maigo6]

So im guessing from the responses i am getting that you guys support your missus famliy? Ok so tell me why you feel the need? im a curious guy.

ThaiVisa members mostly marry into the Elite of Thai society and have independently wealthy wives from influential families.

I think you will find more threads that have this theme than those that will admit they send money to her folks.

Believe what you want if it makes a blind bit of difference either way.

[Changkok]

So im guessing from the responses i am getting that you guys support your missus famliy? Ok so tell me why you feel the need? im a curious guy.

ThaiVisa members mostly marry into the Elite of Thai society and have independently wealthy wives from influential families.

I think you will find more threads that have this theme than those that will admit they send money to her folks.

Believe what you want if it makes a blind bit of difference either way.

Ahhhhh ok maigo so thailand through my eyes is a............HALLUCINATION

[1000baht]

The way I see it my friend is, whats the big deal giving your wife 3,5 or 10000 baht to send to her parents? Everyones situation is different, and yes i have seen cases of silly farangs handing over 30,000 baht without a seconds thought ( probably going straight to her bank account ) . But in my case I have met my gf's father, and he is poor, lives alone, I have no worries sending him 3000 baht a month. It is also culture for the children to take care of the parents, hard to fathom at first, but you get used to it. I understand where you are comming from though.

[Changkok]

The way I see it my friend is, whats the big deal giving your wife 3,5 or 10000 baht to send to her parents? Everyones situation is different, and yes i have seen cases of silly farangs handing over 30,000 baht without a seconds thought ( probably going straight to her bank account ) . But in my case I have met my gf's father, and he is poor, lives alone, I have no worries sending him 3000 baht a month. It is also culture for the children to take care of the parents, hard to fathom at first, but you get used to it. I understand where you are comming from though.

Ok thats a reason thats what im looking for.

Maybe i should start to change my mind on the matter so i dont have to worry about a pension, Once my kids get to 25 im retiring. lol

[Tod Daniels]

If you managed to get to the point of marrying without having to have 'earned' the right, blah-blah-blah (mindless blathering deleted)

That statement is so indicative of the sheep-like mentality foreigners who are married to or otherwise involved with thai women. Sadly there is no such thing as an "earned right" to marry someone. Too many foreigners buy into any "fairy tale" pawned off as an alleged cultural phenomena regarding the support of their (in)significant other's extended family.

Of course, seeing as I don't believe there is such a thing as "thai culture", it is easy for me to discount this as an abberation. Generations of mindless brainwashing does not necessarily a cultural phenomena make, sorry, not in the 'real world' anyway. Anyone who says it is cultural is obviously a color coordinated shirt/bracelet wearing wanna-b-thai, plain and simple. About the only upside to the alleged myth of 'thai culture' is it has made thais myopic in their views, xenophobic to outside influences and predicable to a fault; which I have found can be turned against them easily and used to your advantage.

If a woman's parents were living a semi normal life in Nakhon Nowhere before you met her, I see no reason that they couldn't continue to exist without outside financial intervention afterwards. It truly boggles the mind that ANY first world educated person would give a satang for the support of someone outside the marriage.

With that being said, sadly; I can think of only a few foreign/thai marriages who don't subscribe to this practice (despite Maigo6's astute observation that going by the posts only, it would appear T/V Forum members marry only the uber-rich thai elite). Obviously the brainwashing is successful. In my experience contributing financially is more the norm than the exception to the rule.

I think it ranks right up there with foreigners paying sin-sod for a woman who already has children. In reality, if it were a thai/thai marriage there would be none, as the women is already "second-hand" or "gently used".

[Neeranam]

Because they think that Noi from Buriram, and the "pussy bar", who'd only been doing it for 6 months and only went with 3 other farang is the most beautiful woman in Thailand and they want to single-handedly save her from a life of sin. They believe that the father of her 5 year old son is out the picture and basically are on cloud cuckoo. They have lost all the little sense that they've ever had. They believe that because they are farang they should buy the groceries for her whole family every week and build them a new house, helping all the labourers in the village. They are terified of being the one Thai word they've learned(apart from "poong" and "sanook") which is "kee nieow". Noi has tricked him into thinking it's essential that he give her mother twice more than she would ever earn a month in a job outside Pattaya. But really, the loss of face for her being with an elderly ugly farang and not getting compenated would be the end of the world.

[bkkjames]

If you managed to get to the point of marrying without having to have 'earned' the right, blah-blah-blah (mindless blathering deleted)

That statement is so indicative of the sheep-like mentality foreigners who are married to or otherwise involved with thai women. Sadly there is no such thing as an "earned right" to marry someone. Too many foreigners buy into any "fairy tale" pawned off as an alleged cultural phenomena regarding the support of their (in)significant other's extended family.

Of course, seeing as I don't believe there is such a thing as "thai culture", it is easy for me to discount this as an abberation. Generations of mindless brainwashing does not necessarily a cultural phenomena make, sorry, not in the 'real world' anyway. Anyone who says it is cultural is obviously a color coordinated shirt/bracelet wearing wanna-b-thai, plain and simple. About the only upside to the alleged myth of 'thai culture' is it has made thais myopic in their views, xenophobic to outside influences and predicable to a fault; which I have found can be turned against them easily and used to your advantage.

If a woman's parents were living a semi normal life in Nakhon Nowhere before you met her, I see no reason that they couldn't continue to exist without outside financial intervention afterwards. It truly boggles the mind that ANY first world educated person would give a satang for the support of someone outside the marriage.

With that being said, sadly; I can think of only a few foreign/thai marriages who don't subscribe to this practice (despite Maigo6's astute observation that going by the posts only, it would appear T/V Forum members marry only the uber-rich thai elite). Obviously the brainwashing is successful. In my experience contributing financially is more the norm than the exception to the rule.

I think it ranks right up there with foreigners paying sin-sod for a woman who already has children. In reality, if it were a thai/thai marriage there would be none, as the women is already "second-hand" or "gently used".

Glad to see TD recognises sarcasm. For such an obviously educated person, I thought for a minute there he might have missed it. Can someone bullet point any important details in the rest of the above. NO, ok thanks.

Edited November 21, 2008 by bkkjames

[Neeranam]

About the only upside to the alleged myth of 'thai culture' is it has made thais myopic in their views, xenophobic to outside influences and predicable to a fault; which I have found can be turned against them easily and used to your advantage.

Very true.

[Moonrakers]

My wife is an orphan and an only child.

Her only family is an estranged grandmother up north somewhere.

Her Grandmother has asked for money for a hospital bill before (40k), we paid it and then my wife spoke to the doctor to see how her Nan was, she was OK.

Then a request for another hospital bill came (10k), my wife called the Dr. to see how her Nan was and the Dr. said "What are you talking about, she has not been in since the last time we spoke"

My wife then made it clear (and through an agreement with the hospital), that no money will be paid without being shown a receipt/bill first.

They no longer ask for money.

[Changkok]

If you managed to get to the point of marrying without having to have 'earned' the right, blah-blah-blah (mindless blathering deleted)

That statement is so indicative of the sheep-like mentality foreigners who are married to or otherwise involved with thai women. Sadly there is no such thing as an "earned right" to marry someone. Too many foreigners buy into any "fairy tale" pawned off as an alleged cultural phenomena regarding the support of their (in)significant other's extended family.

Of course, seeing as I don't believe there is such a thing as "thai culture", it is easy for me to discount this as an abberation. Generations of mindless brainwashing does not necessarily a cultural phenomena make, sorry, not in the 'real world' anyway. Anyone who says it is cultural is obviously a color coordinated shirt/bracelet wearing wanna-b-thai, plain and simple. About the only upside to the alleged myth of 'thai culture' is it has made thais myopic in their views, xenophobic to outside influences and predicable to a fault; which I have found can be turned against them easily and used to your advantage.

If a woman's parents were living a semi normal life in Nakhon Nowhere before you met her, I see no reason that they couldn't continue to exist without outside financial intervention afterwards. It truly boggles the mind that ANY first world educated person would give a satang for the support of someone outside the marriage.

With that being said, sadly; I can think of only a few foreign/thai marriages who don't subscribe to this practice (despite Maigo6's astute observation that going by the posts only, it would appear T/V Forum members marry only the uber-rich thai elite). Obviously the brainwashing is successful. In my experience contributing financially is more the norm than the exception to the rule.

I think it ranks right up there with foreigners paying sin-sod for a woman who already has children. In reality, if it were a thai/thai marriage there would be none, as the women is already "second-hand" or "gently used".

I have to admit todd my post was inspired by reading a previous post to yours on another thread thats why i started this one, I just dont get it? Why do people feel the need or obliged to do it when they come from a country where it would never ever happen??? sin sod? yeah maybe but only at the the "thai price" i have a mate who paid 300,000 baht only to discover from my missus speaking to his wifes sister(after only meeting for 5 mins) that the sin sod was to pay for her dads gambling debt. lol

[dingdongrb]

If you managed to get to the point of marrying without having to have 'earned' the right, blah-blah-blah (mindless blathering deleted)

That statement is so indicative of the sheep-like mentality foreigners who are married to or otherwise involved with thai women. Sadly there is no such thing as an "earned right" to marry someone. Too many foreigners buy into any "fairy tale" pawned off as an alleged cultural phenomena regarding the support of their (in)significant other's extended family.

Of course, seeing as I don't believe there is such a thing as "thai culture", it is easy for me to discount this as an abberation. Generations of mindless brainwashing does not necessarily a cultural phenomena make, sorry, not in the 'real world' anyway. Anyone who says it is cultural is obviously a color coordinated shirt/bracelet wearing wanna-b-thai, plain and simple. About the only upside to the alleged myth of 'thai culture' is it has made thais myopic in their views, xenophobic to outside influences and predicable to a fault; which I have found can be turned against them easily and used to your advantage.

If a woman's parents were living a semi normal life in Nakhon Nowhere before you met her, I see no reason that they couldn't continue to exist without outside financial intervention afterwards. It truly boggles the mind that ANY first world educated person would give a satang for the support of someone outside the marriage.

With that being said, sadly; I can think of only a few foreign/thai marriages who don't subscribe to this practice (despite Maigo6's astute observation that going by the posts only, it would appear T/V Forum members marry only the uber-rich thai elite). Obviously the brainwashing is successful. In my experience contributing financially is more the norm than the exception to the rule.

I think it ranks right up there with foreigners paying sin-sod for a woman who already has children. In reality, if it were a thai/thai marriage there would be none, as the women is already "second-hand" or "gently used".

You obviously do not know the Thai culture so let me help you a wee bit... Yes, I am married to a Thai and I whole-heartily believe she didn't marry me for my money because I have none.

Now as far a sinsot, it's not just the farang who marries a Thai that pays sinsot because my sister-in-law just married a Thai and he paid sinsot to her parents. Actually I was never asked to pay 1 baht when I married my wife over 4 years ago whereas they stated to this Thai how much it would be for him to marry their daughter. So this blows any freakin theory of farangs always pay sinsot out of the water.

As for supporting her family, I choose to help them not support them. I loan them money (have done so on many occasions in which I was repaid and sometimes with interest) to help them out just like I have done so with my family back in the USA. Likewise I have a few times given them a few k baht when visiting because they 'put me up and fed me when I stayed at their home. But then again with my aging mother (before she died), I used to send her a few hundred $$ here and there as well as providing airfare for her to travel because I loved her and knew she couldn't afford it otherwise. Just because I did these things for my Mother does that mean that it's a culture thing? Of course, loving or caring for your parents (or family) is a culture thing. Of course unless you were born under a rock and being blatantly stupid.

By the way, why is it some think that only the farangs provide money to the parents. My wife's brother and sister live and work in BKK but they send money almost monthly home to mom and dad......

[dingdongrb]

Because they think that Noi from Buriram, and the "pussy bar", who'd only been doing it for 6 months and only went with 3 other farang is the most beautiful woman in Thailand and they want to single-handedly save her from a life of sin. They believe that the father of her 5 year old son is out the picture and basically are on cloud cuckoo. They have lost all the little sense that they've ever had. They believe that because they are farang they should buy the groceries for her whole family every week and build them a new house, helping all the labourers in the village. They are terified of being the one Thai word they've learned(apart from "poong" and "sanook") which is "kee nieow". Noi has tricked him into thinking it's essential that he give her mother twice more than she would ever earn a month in a job outside Pattaya. But really, the loss of face for her being with an elderly ugly farang and not getting compenated would be the end of the world.

Not afraid of being called a 'cheap charlie' as I tend to always look for the best deal, when it matters.... But those that do not know how to make a relationship work and what it's about are more afraid of being called a 'kee kwai'.... (Or perhaps that jealously falls upon the ones that can't make a go at it either in their own country or hear in LOS where everyone assumes it is a 'piece of cake'.)

[Maigo6]

. But really, the loss of face for her being with an elderly ugly farang and not getting compenated would be the end of the world.

So Neeranam, was that you I saw in Big C Khon Kaen wheeling a trolley around full of goods for mama and the brother ?

[Dakhar]

In a marriage of 8 years now, I think I have dished out to my wife's father 500$ USD. Amazingly they are tye type of folks that find asking for money to be shameful. Wierd, strange, I know, but it is what it is. They are not "rich" by an American stand point, but I guess to most Thais they are not "hurting."

But these are my circumstances, I imagine once a man sees his wife's family conditions, he is probably inclined to give some money.... I would be if my wife came from such conditions. But I would not provide sole support, just help out. Maybe 3K a month or so.

I knew one guy that was giving 1K USD a month, while strugling in the US. He had never been to Thailand before and met her in the states. He was a young guy, just starting out etc. He really did not have that kind of money to be shelling out 1K a month but his wife gave him the song and dance, so he caved in. She latter had his baby & they came to Thailand to see how things are etc. He then discovered that 30K USD is a lot of money, and her parents had absolutley nothing to show for all the money he had been sending them. No new house, car etc....

He put an end to the cravy train, which I am sure she put an end to certain activities that may have compensated for the loss of money.

I don't know what the long term out come of his relationship, but I have a hunch.

PS I did not pay Sinsot either, and there is no way I ever would have if I was told that was a condition. Because really, I would have to say, "Then my condition is, you have to look like Angelina Jole & and be a nympho & have a twin sister."

Edited November 21, 2008 by Dakhar

[bkkjames]

If you managed to get to the point of marrying without having to have 'earned' the right, blah-blah-blah (mindless blathering deleted)

That statement is so indicative of the sheep-like mentality foreigners who are married to or otherwise involved with thai women. Sadly there is no such thing as an "earned right" to marry someone. Too many foreigners buy into any "fairy tale" pawned off as an alleged cultural phenomena regarding the support of their (in)significant other's extended family.

Of course, seeing as I don't believe there is such a thing as "thai culture", it is easy for me to discount this as an abberation. Generations of mindless brainwashing does not necessarily a cultural phenomena make, sorry, not in the 'real world' anyway. Anyone who says it is cultural is obviously a color coordinated shirt/bracelet wearing wanna-b-thai, plain and simple. About the only upside to the alleged myth of 'thai culture' is it has made thais myopic in their views, xenophobic to outside influences and predicable to a fault; which I have found can be turned against them easily and used to your advantage.

If a woman's parents were living a semi normal life in Nakhon Nowhere before you met her, I see no reason that they couldn't continue to exist without outside financial intervention afterwards. It truly boggles the mind that ANY first world educated person would give a satang for the support of someone outside the marriage.

With that being said, sadly; I can think of only a few foreign/thai marriages who don't subscribe to this practice (despite Maigo6's astute observation that going by the posts only, it would appear T/V Forum members marry only the uber-rich thai elite). Obviously the brainwashing is successful. In my experience contributing financially is more the norm than the exception to the rule.

I think it ranks right up there with foreigners paying sin-sod for a woman who already has children. In reality, if it were a thai/thai marriage there would be none, as the women is already "second-hand" or "gently used".

You obviously do not know the Thai culture so let me help you a wee bit... Yes, I am married to a Thai and I whole-heartily believe she didn't marry me for my money because I have none.

Now as far a sinsot, it's not just the farang who marries a Thai that pays sinsot because my sister-in-law just married a Thai and he paid sinsot to her parents. Actually I was never asked to pay 1 baht when I married my wife over 4 years ago whereas they stated to this Thai how much it would be for him to marry their daughter. So this blows any freakin theory of farangs always pay sinsot out of the water.

As for supporting her family, I choose to help them not support them. I loan them money (have done so on many occasions in which I was repaid and sometimes with interest) to help them out just like I have done so with my family back in the USA. Likewise I have a few times given them a few k baht when visiting because they 'put me up and fed me when I stayed at their home. But then again with my aging mother (before she died), I used to send her a few hundred $$ here and there as well as providing airfare for her to travel because I loved her and knew she couldn't afford it otherwise. Just because I did these things for my Mother does that mean that it's a culture thing? Of course, loving or caring for your parents (or family) is a culture thing. Of course unless you were born under a rock and being blatantly stupid.

By the way, why is it some think that only the farangs provide money to the parents. My wife's brother and sister live and work in BKK but they send money almost monthly home to mom and dad......

Hey Rob, pay no attention to the long winded one, if you haven't noticed he only pops his head up on here mid-afternoon on Fridays after teaching 8 year olds English. I only wonder the real reason for his being here with his pent up utter hate of everything Thai.

Perhaps, a victim of sinsot gone sour?

(who actually feels compelled or egotestical enough to use a full name on TV )

[Changkok]

. But really, the loss of face for her being with an elderly ugly farang and not getting compenated would be the end of the world.

So Neeranam, was that you I saw in Big C Khon Kaen wheeling a trolley around full of goods for mama and the brother ?

Khon kaen maigo?? and here is me thinking from all the posts you make constantly about farangs marrying rich birds i was thinking you must of yourself????? Now i understand, So how much do u offer for your inlaws?

[dingdongrb]

"Then my condition is, you have to look like Angelina Jole & and be a nympho & have a twin sister."

Why does everyone think she is so hot? I have never understood that. Don't get me wrong she is not ugly and is beautiful, but if I was wishing...it wouldn't be her...... The only thing that attracts me to her is those full luscious lips.......

[mizzi39]

So im guessing from the responses i am getting that you guys support your missus famliy? Ok so tell me why you feel the need? im a curious guy.

Well personally, I don't support my extended Thai family. Fortunately they are self sufficient. I also don't troll around forums asking stupid questions!

[Changkok]

"Then my condition is, you have to look like Angelina Jole & and be a nympho & have a twin sister."

Why does everyone think she is so hot? I have never understood that. Don't get me wrong she is not ugly and is beautiful, but if I was wishing...it wouldn't be her...... The only thing that attracts me to her is those full luscious lips.......

Cmon mr dingdong its to early to start changing the thread before we have answers

[Changkok]

So im guessing from the responses i am getting that you guys support your missus famliy? Ok so tell me why you feel the need? im a curious guy.

Well personally, I don't support my extended Thai family. Fortunately they are self sufficient. I also don't troll around forums asking stupid questions!

But you spend time to answer stupid questions.

[Shotime]

Guilt is an amazing thing, and it is not exclusive to Thailand. The girls play on foreigners' guilt, and their Mothers use guilt on them. I could never believe how much control the families can exert on their daughters. When you think their Mothers know that when they ask them to send 10K home, and the fact that they know what the girls have to do to get that money, it turns my stomach.

[Neeranam]

. But really, the loss of face for her being with an elderly ugly farang and not getting compenated would be the end of the world.

So Neeranam, was that you I saw in Big C Khon Kaen wheeling a trolley around full of goods for mama and the brother ?

Mama lives 400 km away(our choice) and brothr works in Laem Chabang

[Moonrakers]

"Then my condition is, you have to look like Angelina Jole & and be a nympho & have a twin sister."

Why does everyone think she is so hot? I have never understood that. Don't get me wrong she is not ugly and is beautiful, but if I was wishing...it wouldn't be her...... The only thing that attracts me to her is those full luscious lips.......

Cmon mr dingdong its to early to start changing the thread before we have answers

I want answers as to why dingdongrb doesn't think that Angelina is a ravishing sex kitten.