Was I Being A Cheap Charlie Or Not?

[TheVinylMan]

OK I know there are gonna be some of you who are gonna slate me but lets see where this goes.........

6 months ago I got a girl to finish working in a bar.......... she had only been there a couple of days and came direct from the "Isaan Girl Factory" so she was not being too corrupted..... I know this as i know the bar owner and he had got the lady from Issaan himself.... and no baby to look after :-)

We had been getting on very very well..... I had been giving her 20k a month of which she always sent 4k to her mum and dad, I pay for all the apartment and bills, food and drink and when we go out she never has to pay for anything......so she literally has 16k a month just for her........ then i left out an atm slip showing a LARGE balance and all hel_l broke loose.

"Why do you only give me 20k a month when you make xxxxxxx amount per month " blah blah blah you can imagine the rest........ anyway to cut a long story short. I went to Hua Hin to visit a client for a couple of days and all the time i was there she was calling me and sms-ing me telling me that i have taken another girl and i never take care her etc etc............ When i got back is all I got was ear ache so i thought I can really do without this and we split up....... I gave her an extra 10K on top of her 20k to make sure she had a few baht to sort out a room etc.

Anyway............ the question I want answering .................. Do you think giving a girl 20K a month is being a cheap charlie irrespective of what i do or earn???

Or do you think that because she saw my atm slip that she suddenly saw lots and lots of 1000baht notes and was trying it on???

To be honest its only been 4 days we have been apart but I am really missing the girl............... I look forward to your comments

VM

[Richie1971]

OK I know there are gonna be some of you who are gonna slate me but lets see where this goes.........

6 months ago I got a girl to finish working in a bar.......... she had only been there a couple of days and came direct from the "Isaan Girl Factory" so she was not being too corrupted..... I know this as i know the bar owner and he had got the lady from Issaan himself.... and no baby to look after :-)

We had been getting on very very well..... I had been giving her 20k a month of which she always sent 4k to her mum and dad, I pay for all the apartment and bills, food and drink and when we go out she never has to pay for anything......so she literally has 16k a month just for her........ then i left out an atm slip showing a LARGE balance and all hel_l broke loose.

"Why do you only give me 20k a month when you make xxxxxxx amount per month " blah blah blah you can imagine the rest........ anyway to cut a long story short. I went to Hua Hin to visit a client for a couple of days and all the time i was there she was calling me and sms-ing me telling me that i have taken another girl and i never take care her etc etc............ When i got back is all I got was ear ache so i thought I can really do without this and we split up....... I gave her an extra 10K on top of her 20k to make sure she had a few baht to sort out a room etc.

Anyway............ the question I want answering .................. Do you think giving a girl 20K a month is being a cheap charlie irrespective of what i do or earn???

Or do you think that because she saw my atm slip that she suddenly saw lots and lots of 1000baht notes and was trying it on???

To be honest its only been 4 days we have been apart but I am really missing the girl............... I look forward to your comments

VM

No you were not being Cheap Charlie - My advice would be to run away - that is a sizable amount of money. - Will end in tears.

[britmaveric]

So you have an employed a thai lady to be your gf and now she wants a raise because she sees how much dosh you have?

Any rate most people don't pay their gf or bf, they sort of make their own dosh.

[bkkjames]

OK I know there are gonna be some of you who are gonna slate me but lets see where this goes.........

6 months ago I got a girl to finish working in a bar.......... she had only been there a couple of days and came direct from the "Isaan Girl Factory" so she was not being too corrupted..... I know this as i know the bar owner and he had got the lady from Issaan himself.... and no baby to look after :-)

We had been getting on very very well..... I had been giving her 20k a month of which she always sent 4k to her mum and dad, I pay for all the apartment and bills, food and drink and when we go out she never has to pay for anything......so she literally has 16k a month just for her........ then i left out an atm slip showing a LARGE balance and all hel_l broke loose.

"Why do you only give me 20k a month when you make xxxxxxx amount per month " blah blah blah you can imagine the rest........ anyway to cut a long story short. I went to Hua Hin to visit a client for a couple of days and all the time i was there she was calling me and sms-ing me telling me that i have taken another girl and i never take care her etc etc............ When i got back is all I got was ear ache so i thought I can really do without this and we split up....... I gave her an extra 10K on top of her 20k to make sure she had a few baht to sort out a room etc.

Anyway............ the question I want answering .................. Do you think giving a girl 20K a month is being a cheap charlie irrespective of what i do or earn???

Or do you think that because she saw my atm slip that she suddenly saw lots and lots of 1000baht notes and was trying it on???

To be honest its only been 4 days we have been apart but I am really missing the girl............... I look forward to your comments

VM

No

But you are getting what you paid for.

[Jingthing]

What an ingrate. Good riddance for bad rubbish. You got off easy.

[JUDAS]

Do you really think you had a relationship with this girl? IMO all you had was a financial agreement giving you some form of exclusivity, right? So this girl, your "staff" realizes you are somewhat better off than she thought and demands a pay rise. You, the employer don't think she's worth it, end of story. No relationship here, purely a business arrangement blah, blah, blah...

[t.s]

i think giving a girl anything to live with you is pathetic period.

[TheVinylMan]

As I said in the original post I knew i would get the "why pay a girl to live with you brigade" slating me ........... but do none of you ever give your wives/gf's (thai or not) any money for there own needs???? I always gave my ex-wife (english) some money every month just to keep her sweet.... so she could go and get some new clothes/ perfumes etc!!!

[bunnaag]

No you are not a cheap charlie you are not a very experienced charlie.It also depends how much she has to pay to the bar owner who told you the old story of an unexperienced girl with no child which arrived only a few days ago from the country side.That she is not so unexperienced shows her reaction when she saw your ATM slip.20 000 Bath a month is a big amount for a rural girl.

[TheVinylMan]

What an ingrate. Good riddance for bad rubbish. You got off easy.

Thanks for that.............. the more I think about it the more i think that your right

[wamberal]

Why would anybody keep a large amount of money in an account accessible by ATM?

1 out of 10. Try much harder.

[TheVinylMan]

No you are not a cheap charlie you are not a very experienced charlie.It also depends how much she has to pay to the bar owner who told you the old story of an unexperienced girl with no child which arrived only a few days ago from the country side.That she is not so unexperienced shows her reaction when she saw your ATM slip.20 000 Bath a month is a big amount for a rural girl.

I not too sure about the inexperienced bit.......... with regards to the bar owner........... he is a friend of mine from the UK who i have known for A LONG TIME.................. he knew i would like the girl and when we got on very well there was NO MONEY given by me to the bar and the girl had no ties to the bar.............. other than she had some mates working there who she would go and see when I was working just for a chat................ who i think talked her in to trying to get more baht out of me

[ChangMaiSausage]

Keep away from her, at this moment all her friends will be telling her what to do...... The nice sms messages will start to arrive shortly followed by the bitter and twisted ones.

Good Luck don't let temptation or alcohol change your mind.

[TheVinylMan]

Why would anybody keep a large amount of money in an account accessible by ATM?

1 out of 10. Try much harder.

Because I get paid In THB direct to bangkok bank which I have Visa card for and savings account........... where do you keep money.......... under your pillow

[TheVinylMan]

Keep away from her, at this moment all her friends will be telling her what to do...... The nice sms messages will start to arrive shortly followed by the bitter and twisted ones.

Good Luck don't let temptation or alcohol change your mind.

This is what i think............ her "friends" that are still in the bar have told her to get more etc etc.............. no intentions of going back.......... once bitten twice shy

[kingwillly]

As I said in the original post I knew i would get the "why pay a girl to live with you brigade" slating me ........... but do none of you ever give your wives/gf's (thai or not) any money for there own needs???? I always gave my ex-wife (english) some money every month just to keep her sweet.... so she could go and get some new clothes/ perfumes etc!!!

exactly. if we make a bit share a bit.

doesnt mean you are buying a girlfriend. just common decency, aint it?

[JUDAS]

As I said in the original post I knew i would get the "why pay a girl to live with you brigade" slating me ........... but do none of you ever give your wives/gf's (thai or not) any money for there own needs???? I always gave my ex-wife (english) some money every month just to keep her sweet.... so she could go and get some new clothes/ perfumes etc!!!

We all have our own set of values, views on what is right and wrong. Off course it's normal to buy ones partner gifts from time to time, for me it's a sign of respect and appreciation amongst other things. Having a young, single ( no children to care for ) partner who doesn't work, for whatever reason would not be an ideal partner for me. Do you believe you are actually helping this young lady by making her totally reliant on you?

I'm in Issan at the minute and in the last few days have along with the wife spoken to people earning 4-5 thousand baht a month. Poor indeed, but friendly, cheerful and probably with a sense of self respect. Better to help this lady of yours progress in life through supporting her with education etc rather than her present situation.

[TheVinylMan]

As I said in the original post I knew i would get the "why pay a girl to live with you brigade" slating me ........... but do none of you ever give your wives/gf's (thai or not) any money for there own needs???? I always gave my ex-wife (english) some money every month just to keep her sweet.... so she could go and get some new clothes/ perfumes etc!!!

exactly. if we make a bit share a bit.

doesnt mean you are buying a girlfriend. just common decency, aint it?

Well that was my thinking ............. but obviously alot of guys dont do that lol............ I just like the "lady in my life" to look good and be happy (thai or not thai....... dont make any difference)

[samuibeachcomber]

plenty more cheaper fish in the sea,but beware she wont like to lose her golden goose,and could get nasty,watch your back.If your gonna have a live in relationship,then set the rules from day one,if your earning big baht and dont want her to work fine,but seriously 20,000baht a month is a lot of dosh.give her 8000 a month,more than enough.I fit was me i'd insist she get a job(not bar related of course.Laew tee khun though.

[TheVinylMan]

As I said in the original post I knew i would get the "why pay a girl to live with you brigade" slating me ........... but do none of you ever give your wives/gf's (thai or not) any money for there own needs???? I always gave my ex-wife (english) some money every month just to keep her sweet.... so she could go and get some new clothes/ perfumes etc!!!

We all have our own set of values, views on what is right and wrong. Off course it's normal to buy ones partner gifts from time to time, for me it's a sign of respect and appreciation amongst other things. Having a young, single ( no children to care for ) partner who doesn't work, for whatever reason would not be an ideal partner for me. Do you believe you are actually helping this young lady by making her totally reliant on you?

I'm in Issan at the minute and in the last few days have along with the wife spoken to people earning 4-5 thousand baht a month. Poor indeed, but friendly, cheerful and probably with a sense of self respect. Better to help this lady of yours progress in life through supporting her with education etc rather than her present situation.

Funny enough she was getting one of the Wall Street English courses for her birthday which would of been the middle of this month.....You know I tried to do right by this girl.............. but with her having bg friends i think have basically Fvcked everything up for us

[kingwillly]

plenty more cheaper fish in the sea,but beware she wont like to lose her golden goose,and could get nasty,watch your back.If your gonna have a live in relationship,then set the rules from day one,if your earning big baht and dont want her to work fine,but seriously 20,000baht a month is a lot of dosh.give her 8000 a month,more than enough.I fit was me i'd insist she get a job(not bar related of course.Laew tee khun though.

now that's cheap., i was giving mine 25K a month

[dotcom]

Plenty more fish in the sea. Many of them are greedy & short sighted. Keep looking till you find a sweet girl who isn't a gold digger.

[sibeymai]

While you think you're just giving your TG some spending money she's seeing it as a job. That's indisputable since she asked for a pay rise. Even if she came back at 20K a month, you'd start to hear all types of "sick buffalo" excuses from her about why she needed some extra cash from you.

You'll never know if you can trust a TG while you're paying her to be your TG. Suggest you find girls who don't want to be paid if you want anything long term that won't bleed you dry financially and make you an emotional wreck. There's really no difference in the physical part of the relationship whether they're paid or not so the very bottom line is why pay 20K for something you can have for free.

Save the 20K for the mia noi.

[Scott]

Your a smart guy. Never mind the folks who question the 'relationship'. You made a deal, she was from a bar....so nothing to really surprise you. You got by a lot cheaper and better than a lot of men. You also got out of it relatively easy. Best of luck to you.

[Jingthing]

Its possible she created the break up on purpose from a psychological perspective. She may have dreamed of big things in the bg trade, you cut her young career short and she had settled for something that didn't match the big dreams from the farm. She may also have been very bored. Now she has a chance to work it and go for the gold.

Edited February 4, 2009 by Jingthing

[TheVinylMan]

plenty more cheaper fish in the sea,but beware she wont like to lose her golden goose,and could get nasty,watch your back.If your gonna have a live in relationship,then set the rules from day one,if your earning big baht and dont want her to work fine,but seriously 20,000baht a month is a lot of dosh.give her 8000 a month,more than enough.I fit was me i'd insist she get a job(not bar related of course.Laew tee khun though.

now that's cheap., i was giving mine 25K a month

Mug

[TheVinylMan]

Thanks for all the comments guys.................. obviously there are a few comments that I could say "hang on a minute chill out" coz i missed out a bit of the fine detail to our relationship in the original post.............. but 90% of the comments so far have been within the way i am thinking.

[Jingthing]

"My girl/guy is not like that." Uh huh. But mostly from the bar, they are like that. You merely experienced the rule that proves the rule.

Edited February 4, 2009 by Jingthing

[Hssl]

No not cheap - daft but not cheap

Listen to the following song by the Offspring :"Why Don't You Get a Job?"

[bunnaag]

No you are not a cheap charlie you are not a very experienced charlie.It also depends how much she has to pay to the bar owner who told you the old story of an unexperienced girl with no child which arrived only a few days ago from the country side.That she is not so unexperienced shows her reaction when she saw your ATM slip.20 000 Bath a month is a big amount for a rural girl.Do you really believe that a bar owner who went up country to stock up on his dancers would let her go only after a few days work without a substantial bar fine?He probably had to pay some money to a family member.