whatawonderfulday Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 Does anyone know yet the school's name where this teacher is employed ?
najman Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 The Question: Would a male student suffer similar problems, or will he not?Answer: Yes. It creates unrealistic expectations in the mind of the boy, who will likely tend to focus on future, and probably unsatisfying, relationships with older women, and he will very likely have difficulty forming a stable relationship with any woman for many years. Joke as we may, it is an assault on the sensibilities of the boy. His judgment will be clouded, whether he's rich or poor, and his future endeavors with females will always be tainted by this seeming ideal, but never-again to be had experience. Much like giving a starving child chocolate once, he will never again begin to find in the reality of life, a woman to match this forbidden, temporary dream. Sorry for him. Bottom-line: He was molested, and will carry the memory all his life. Instead of closing the thread, lets have a civil discussion about it...We know for a fact that an underage female student being shagged/raped by a male teacher could face serious psychological problems afterwards and possibly later in life. My question is: Would a male student suffer similar problems, or will he not? He was molested? Poor sweat inosent boy just sat there trying to do his home work while this crazy female teacher kept asking him for sex and pushing him till he gave in? Oh and then she kept asking him to do weird things with her.... blah blah blah... what a load of... Yes she was stupid to get sexually involved with him and she should resign, which she already did on her own. Any mental distribance in the boys mind was caused by the boy. If he cant take responsibilty for it then yes he will end up with a messed up sex life. Brought about by himself not the woman. Just coz he's underage doesnt mean he doesnt have to take responsibility for his actions. He wont change until he does. But thats his fault not hers. She's messed up her own life a will have to deal with it seperately. But to be charged for sexual assult is nuts. But then again the western world is full of insane laws and thailand and other countries are expected to follow... Welcome to Planet Earth
CRUNCHER Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 The lad might or might not cope well with his experience. That is not really the point. There has to be certain standards. One is that when parents hand over their kids to a teacher they can do so with the confidence that the teacher will, at all times, behave with professionalism and propriety. The important thing here is not that an older woman had sex with a minor, even though that may be a bad thing in itself. What is the issue is that she was his teacher. It hould never have happened and she should suffer the consequences. It would be interesting to see how many people who think this was a bad thing are parents and how many who think the contrary are not.
najman Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 That last statement* is so far from factual it is concerning. Read my above post... What not factual? That a boy of 13 cant take responsibility for his own actions? The modern western ideas about how we are all just brains and chemicals obviously has some interest for you. Perhaps it's a great way of not having to take responsibility for your actions. "My brain chemicals did it, not me" What a wonderful insane world we will live in when we dont need to take responsibilty for our actions and blame it on our brain size and cemistry. Then when we do something bad we can say to the court "I was insane at that time" and cant take responsibility. Please "medicate" me for the rest of my life... Thats the direction the laws are taking us. What the teacher did was wrong and what the boy did was wrong too. They are both stupid. There is no dobt about that. I dont condone either actions. But I wont stick up for this little punk that treatened to tell if she didnt continue to have sex with him. This kid will turn out to be the real criminal by letting him get away with this. He should also be punished by the law for being such a little dirt bag. I hope his parents ground him for a year. No teacher should have sexual relations with their students as it causes more trouble than whats it's worth. So yes she should be removed from her position (she did that by herself). But now they take it too far coz the general law of underage sex does not take into account the 1000 different circumstances that could be involved and lable it all under the same heading. That s not justice. Thats stupidity. It's the equivelant of charging someone for murder when they were defending themselves. Or being found guilty of assult coz you hurt an intruder in your house. If the law cant judge on a case by case basis then we will never have justice. She didn't molest him, she gave in to his advances which was stupid but hardly on the level of being a thilthy rotten phidophile. Labling her as one is about as stupid as i can think of. Most of us are aware of our actions even at a younf age and happy that people let us get away with it coz we are young. Yet we know what we did was wrong and he will have to live with that. If his parents treat him as the victim then yes he will be screwed up. If he is treated as the one who did wrong then at least he has the chance to correct himself and change his ways. From this he would learn and grow and straighten up. To do otherwise is a dis-service to him. My brother stole from a friend when he was young. Even his friend did something bad to him that caused him to do it my dad didnt put up with it and made him make amends. My brother never stole again and was very thankfulu for my dad many years later for doing that. If the same treatment does not get given to this boy then yes he will be messed up later on. But he only has himself to blame and the lax parents. If I was his parents I would be angry. I would want her fired but i would punish my son more. I wouldnt want to see her labled as a criminal. I would even seek her out and get her to toughen up. I would get my son to make amends and take responsibility for what he didnt. Only then would he be able to move on quilt free. Rehabilitating criminals requires then to re-gan their self respect. Not just punishing them. I would take this approach to the situation.
way2muchcoffee Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 (edited) Given that boys/men become inundated with a virtual overdose of testosterone at around 12-13, and a bit earlier women begin menstruation, one can't help but contemplate when precisely it is that nature intends humans to begin having sexual intercourse. Take away cultural prohibitions, religious proscriptions, parental apprehensions, societal restrictions, and psychological misinterpretations, and it becomes clear that at about this age boys and girls are infused with a healthy, normal, and natural desire for sexual intercourse. In this case, however, there is clear abuse of the teacher-student professional relationship. The age differential is also questionable. Edited February 18, 2009 by way2muchcoffee
skiman1 Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 Thai police arrest female teacher for sex with teenagerBangkok - Thai police arrested a female teacher for having sex with a 13-year-old boy whom she was tutoring in her room, media reports said Tuesday. Police arrested Thanawan Klongsinchai, a 29-year-old English teacher, Monday on charges of molesting a minor, the Khao Sod newspaper said. Thanawan denied the charge, claiming the sex was consensual. Parents of the 13-year-old, who was big for his age group, pressed charges against the teacher after the boy told his friends of the affair, the newspaper said. Thanawan had been providing the boy private tutorials in English in her school dormitory, where the alleged harassment took place. She claimed the boy made the first moves and she eventually consented. DPA / 2009-02-17 It seems insensitive of his parents to talk about the size of his tackle to the media and spoil his fun with the Teacher - they are clearly unfit to raise a child -
najman Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 "Fact: Human brain won't be developed fully until later in his life, thus affecting decision making abilities. Fact: Because the brain is still actively developing, this will be carried his entire life.. Fact: Some cope some don't Fact: Sex with minors is illegal in the Kingdom." Fact 1 is a theory not grounded in reality. But upheld by "mental doctors" that are more insane than their patents and insane laws Fact 2 is opinion and does not agree with common sense. People change their own condition or they do not. How he corrects his mistakes is up to him and will be the deciding factor Fact 3 is so true and depends on the actions they take to correct their mistakes rather than the colour of their brain chemicals Fact 4 is true and i hope they handle them on a case by case basis. I dont agree with sex with little girls and certainly dont condon it under any circumstances. This is not about a a little girl vitimized by a pedophile, this is a story about a horny little manipulative boy and a stupid teacher that gave in to him. They are hardly the same.
George4 Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 (edited) It's a toughy this because the law comes into it. The law being an ass as usual. Any man who casts his mind back to when he was first in his teens will remember the more mature boy of their group of friends. The one who was first to get laid. Look him up and see if he has gone nuts and been locked up. I sincerely doubt it. To reverse the roles to try and make a point is BS. Man is most often the hunter, which is natural and as Najman says this kid was obviously sniffing about. The fact of life is it is wrong for an older man to seduce a young girl of that age. For a young guy it's boogie boogie time and that would do him absolutely no harm whatsoever if he is a perfectly normal young man IMO What might leave it's mark is the dramatic aftermath of it getting to a stage where the law have stepped in. However, the law is the law, we make them and we must abide by them. We can't change that and unfortunately the teacher will suffer for a few moments of weakness even if deepdown no one really gives a hoot Edited February 18, 2009 by George4
Scott Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 The mention of pedophilia has been brought up a few times. From a psychological point of view, pedophelia is the attraction to pre-pubescent children. Once children have entered puberty, from a psychological point of view, they are considered 'fair game'. The law, of course, has a whole different take on the age matter. Thanh earlier wrote about some early (gay) sexual relationships with older men in which he initiated. I had similar experiences--but being the seducer and the pusuer is quite different than when it is the other way around. There is no way of knowing whether this kid will suffer any psychological problems as a result of what happened--he could and they could be severe; or he may not. One thing is for sure, it's probably best if his introduction to sex would have been later and with someone more age appropriate, and not in a position of authority. My guess is that he will have some 'issues' as a result of this at a minimum.
neverdie Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 It's amazing that people cannot see the difference between female teacher/young boy and male teacher/young girl. Oh sorry - just because the boy got turned on it's ok is it?? So if I change the details a little, do you still think it's ok? How about the teacher being 27 and the boy being 11?? How about the teacher being 24 and the boy being 7? How about the teacher being 20 and the boy being 3? I'm sure a boy of 3 can get a 'stiffy' if you 'massage' him enough. Does that make it all ok and ignore the legality of the act? Simon Sometimes you shock me simon. Are you trying to tell us something?
Digitalman Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 (edited) "Fact: Human brain won't be developed fully until later in his life, thus affecting decision making abilities.Fact: Because the brain is still actively developing, this will be carried his entire life.. Fact: Some cope some don't Fact: Sex with minors is illegal in the Kingdom." Fact 1 is a theory not grounded in reality. But upheld by "mental doctors" that are more insane than their patents and insane laws Fact 2 is opinion and does not agree with common sense. People change their own condition or they do not. How he corrects his mistakes is up to him and will be the deciding factor Fact 3 is so true and depends on the actions they take to correct their mistakes rather than the colour of their brain chemicals Fact 4 is true and i hope they handle them on a case by case basis. I dont agree with sex with little girls and certainly dont condon it under any circumstances. This is not about a a little girl vitimized by a pedophile, this is a story about a horny little manipulative boy and a stupid teacher that gave in to him. They are hardly the same. It isn't a hobby, I speak from past professional experience my friend. Number one, don't confuse chemical make up with physiological and neurological development, be aware that there is a difference. Number two, you said it yourself, "this is a story about a horny little manipulative BOY," not an adult. Fact 1: It is not a theory made up by "mental doctors." There is just no other way to say it, if you can't agree that "boys" are not fully rational in the way that adults are, well... read my above statement again. Fact 2 really belongs together with fact 3, he will carry it positively or negatively. We have this thing called "memory." Fact 4: Sure we have to look at the case, and seek justice as best we can, but the black and white about what the law says is that sex with a minor is illegal. Are there some gray areas in the law, yes, but you can't disregard what is clearly black and white because of the gray. I will never understand what exactly people are advocating when they look to find exceptions and gray area in the law. This is what the law says, take it or leave it, its the best thing we've got and the best we are ever going to have. We know you don't condone sex with little girls, so why do you maintain that this case about a little boy is different somehow? Edited February 18, 2009 by Digitalman
toybits Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 If what they said that the 13 year old boy was blackmailing the teacher, then I would have to agree with 0Mix1up. this is a story about a horny little manipulative boy and a stupid teacher that gave in to him. They are hardly the same. very stupid post^^^^^ why dont you sugest throwing him in jail? just to make it complete
Plus Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 Legally it's a clear statutory rape. Professionally it's inappropriate. Morally, if you forget teacher-student thing for a moment, it depends. Morally we compare him to our moral standards and we, in general, think that having an intercourse at the age or 13 is not going to do any damage to the kid. Some of us disagree - we obviously don't have the same moral and ethical standards. I understand the concern that the kid might grow messed up and develop a "wrong" attitude towards sex, on the other hand I understand people who say there's nothing wrong with it in the first place. >>> They shagged three-four times, the fellow was caught bragging about it to his friends. Was it any psychologically different from going to a brothel instead? I don't think so. I also think that they person with a jacket over the head is the student, not the teacher. The streak of white reminds me of student uniform. If that is a boy, and he is describesd as big for his age, then he is a head above accompanying teacher and it just doesn't look a minor.
Arkady Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 I still think that: the full facts of this case have not come out yet; and that the teacher will soon retract her confession which she would certainly not have made, if she had had a decent lawyer present. In fact she should probably have taken the 5th and reserved her right to refuse to answer police questions and testify in court, like most influential Thai criminals do. It is unlikely that any witnesses were in the room apart from the teacher and the boy and it is too late to take DNA samples. Her initial statement seemed to suggest she didn't realise that consensual sex with under 15 year olds was illegal. She said that the boy threatened her with exposure, if she didn't agree to have sex with him again, which sounds like quite nasty behaviour, if true, and not the actions of a traumatised child. Wouldn't be surprised if the boy or his parents shook her down for cash too. Obviously what the teacher did was illegal and morally wrong and our opinions as to whether he was the victim or she was are irrelevant, let alone TV members own frustrated adolescent fantasies. Let's see how it plays out legally, if the press doesn't lose interest that is.
Lost in LOS Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 where was she when i was young I would have kept quiet
jtp Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 (edited) It's not rape,it's carnal knowledge.If the lad was pre-pubescent then it could be considered rape.I would not be too impressed if it was my boy at 13,as i would firstly be concerned about std's,then about his capacity to understand that it was merely sex,and not love.Would it effect him emotionally?Who knows.What kind of a slag goes around shagging her 13 year old pupils? And that goes for both sex's. Edited February 18, 2009 by tritexengineering
Arkady Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 The parents' lawyer was on TV saying that the parents knew the boy had lost his virginity because his foreskin could suddenly be retracted which the lawyer claimed only happens to boys after they have had sex for the first time. I wonder what planet the lawyer and the father are living on. If they don't have any better evidence than that, they will have a hard time when the teacher retracts her confession.
Miserere Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 The parents' lawyer was on TV saying that the parents knew the boy had lost his virginity because his foreskin could suddenly be retracted What were the parents doing playing with their teen boy sons foreskin? I mean if your bored watch TV, don't play with your sons foreskin, (well not if he's underage anyway). Disgusting!
Arkady Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 (edited) Legally it's a clear statutory rape.Professionally it's inappropriate. Morally, if you forget teacher-student thing for a moment, it depends. Morally we compare him to our moral standards and we, in general, think that having an intercourse at the age or 13 is not going to do any damage to the kid. Some of us disagree - we obviously don't have the same moral and ethical standards. I understand the concern that the kid might grow messed up and develop a "wrong" attitude towards sex, on the other hand I understand people who say there's nothing wrong with it in the first place. >>> They shagged three-four times, the fellow was caught bragging about it to his friends. Was it any psychologically different from going to a brothel instead? I don't think so. I also think that they person with a jacket over the head is the student, not the teacher. The streak of white reminds me of student uniform. If that is a boy, and he is describesd as big for his age, then he is a head above accompanying teacher and it just doesn't look a minor. The person behind the police jacket is the teacher. In another photo in the same series you can see her obviously female hair but not her face. The person holding up the jacket is not a teacher but a police woman and probably the owner of the jacket. Many Thai lads do have their first sexual experience in brothels at a young age and it might not be much different emotionally for them but the teacher's act is still illegal. The teacher seems pretty dumb to have done it with a school boy in the first place and, having done it, to admit it to the cops. I don't think many youngish female teachers would give extra tuition to school boys one on one in their own dorm bedrooms, which often don't allow male visitors at all. There must be other more public spaces they can use where they can't be jumped. Perhaps she liked the way the boy leered at her and wanted a bit of excitement. My gf just told me that a new type of dare amongst today's free wheelin "gig" generation of Thai college girls who have got bored with competing to be first to bed the male ajarn is to go to the Mrs Robinson end of the spectrum and initiate eager younger boys. I was pretty surprised to hear that but don't doubt that it happens and that this is not an isolated case. Edited February 18, 2009 by Arkady
0Mix1up Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 WHY WAS MY POST DELETED? this is stupid this is a story about a horny little manipulative boy and a stupid teacher that gave in to him. They are hardly the same. and if anything that post should have been deleted!
simon43 Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 Neverdie, my post was meant to be shocking. My point being that this incident raises the question of where do you draw the line at sexual relations between an adult female and a male child. Although in this case the actions of the teacher were illegal, some TV members seem to be trying to justify the situation or make light-hearted about the situation. Change the ages by a few years (of the boy) and you are in a totally different ball-park (pardon the pun...) At what age of the boy would some TV members still laugh off the incident. Bottom line - the teacher was in a position of responsibility, care and trust. Regardless of what 'advances' the boy may or may not have made to her, she should have rebuked them. Simon
marquess Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 Bottom line - the teacher was in a position of responsibility, care and trust. Regardless of what 'advances' the boy may or may not have made to her, she should have rebuked them. Agreed fully on that, though I don't think she should do jail time the loss of her job and repuation is punishment enough. Though having said that there was a female teacher who was done in the UK only a couple of weeks back for sending lewd text messages, she was 41 and the boy 14, she has been given a years custodial sentence.
drummachine Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 I think this will be more traumatic now it is publicised. These events should be dealt with in more of a reserved manner, better for all involved. Now he will be known as the lad who damaged the teacher and she as the teacher who damaged the lad.
Miserere Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 Neverdie, my post was meant to be shocking. My point being that this incident raises the question of where do you draw the line at sexual relations between an adult female and a male child. Where its the Mother? ~shudder~
seehow Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 This really puzzles me. Parents of the 13-year-old, who was big for his age group. Why would they even say that? Because he was big it means she didn't know (She was tutoring him) or because he was big it makes it OK? Maybe they are trying to say his little dinky is bigger than a pinkie? Please can anyone explain why or what is the point other than trying to make less of an issue out of it. There is no such thing as consensual sex with a 13 year old and I find some of the comments made here by members really appalling. Think back when you were 13 and how you thought you knew it all but now you can say WOW I didn't know sh@t, well now put that same scenario in a room with a predator and surely you can see the manipulation scenario. This will hurt him in the short and long run especially in this culture, he will only be know as the boy whom was raped by his teacher regardless if he wanted to be with her or not, even if he wants to try to wear it like a badge. She took the trust given to her and stepped on it regardless if he pursued her or not she should have taken a stronger moral stance and known it was just his hormones out of control and since his pillow or some hot apple pie wasn't there to hump he wanted whatever he knew would put out. I think this will be more traumatic now it is publicised. These events should be dealt with in more of a reserved manner, better for all involved. Now he will be known as the lad who damaged the teacher and she as the teacher who damaged the lad. Why would you think that? If it was a falang they would be plastered all over the TV now that it is a Thai and a women let them see they have social issues that need to be dealt with also. But for Gods sake keep the boys name out of it.
seehow Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 He was molested? Poor sweat inosent boy just sat there trying to do his home work while this crazy female teacher kept asking him for sex and pushing him till he gave in? Oh and then she kept asking him to do weird things with her.... blah blah blah... what a load of...Yes she was stupid to get sexually involved with him and she should resign, which she already did on her own. Any mental distribance in the boys mind was caused by the boy. If he cant take responsibilty for it then yes he will end up with a messed up sex life. Brought about by himself not the woman. Just coz he's underage doesnt mean he doesnt have to take responsibility for his actions. He wont change until he does. But thats his fault not hers. She's messed up her own life a will have to deal with it seperately. But to be charged for sexual assult is nuts. But then again the western world is full of insane laws and thailand and other countries are expected to follow... Welcome to Planet Earth Man you are nuts, you have a very disturbed look on life. If you were molested by someone it is never to late to seek help because anyone who could put that kind of pressure on a 13 year old boy obviously has problems. If you have kids I truly feel sorry for them and hope the neighbors keep an eye on you so whatever has happened to you, you do not pass it on to your kids. Try to break the cycle not add to it.
seehow Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 presented Miss Nam Khang (an assumed name to protect her identity) If it is a falang is name is released so why are they protecting her? decided that Miss Nam Khang had sexually molested the boy Chujing But the boys name they release This country has some big moral issues, he is going to suffer with this for a long time. he doesn't really know how to manage the thoughts about having sex, plus it was with a teacher, he has let down his family, his teacher has been arrested for being with him, and now that everyone knows who he is they will be staring him down and making him feel like something is wrong with him. I feel sorry for him, in the next 6 months this is really going to hit him hard.
Artisi Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 She is wrong - full stop. If was reversed gender or a 26 y.o. male and a 13 y.o. boy there wouldn't be any maybe's about it. Just this week a teacher was charged in Sydney for sexual advance offences commited something like 40 years ago, no excuses accepted.
ray23 Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 Lots of issues here. Older adult, 13 year old, woman with boy, position of authority, who seduced whom, Thai culture, etc. I do not doubt that there can be some trauma for the boy, but maybe not half as much as with girls seduced by men. I worked with Mayas who married at 14, but their culture prepared them. This culture does not.But if it is a crime, it is a crime. Oh, and reporters do not get the facts right sometimes. The boy could have been 14.9, and experienced already. I think this hits the nail on he head, it's not a biological thing for boys or girls, it's a social norm. We are equipped bery early on to have sex good reason for it when you figure the average life span has been 35 years at points in our history. I had sex at about the same age with a very older woman, so did another friend of mine. His older brither decided it was time we tasted the fruit of life. To be honest scared the hel_l out of me. But nither one of us went around bragging about it we woudl have gotten io in trouble if anyone found out about it and we knew it. Better sex then the first teenager I had sex with. Did it harm me, no. The fact is most of us ran around hard everytime we saw a girl from age 12 on. That is biological. But Our societies hold adults to different stanfarfds cause we now do live much longer then 35. Certain profession are more seseptible to timtation therefore they are held even higher standards. Even as a cop it woudl have been easy to fall into that. especaillly with explorer programs. But it is just not the right thing to do we were trusted in society, you don't violate that trust. Same thing happened in the states wih a teacher went on for years. You can find tons of undersage hooker both male a female any place in he world. Here you better be trying to d find out just how old that cutie male or female you are about to play with, or you can find yorself in some real deep trouble real fast. Sorry teachers male or female should be held to a different standard, they are proessional entrusted with our children's well being. The harm comes for the standard set by society what is accpetable and what is not. It absolutley nothing to do with what yuor body is telling you.. My Father married mother when he was 35 and she was 17, married till they died and raised seven children, They were married in 1919 and it was not unusual at all in those days. Times change and views do as well.
Recommended Posts