Sorry, Men But,

[mc2]

men attracted to "assertive women" are in fact regressing to childhood to seek a boy-mother type relationship where mother tells the boy what to do and how to do it, even some verbal smacks now and then to keep him a good boy.

[Gary A]

men attracted to "assertive women" are in fact regressing to childhood to seek a boy-mother type relationship where mother tells the boy what to do and how to do it, even some verbal smacks now and then to keep him a good boy.

Maybe you're right. Over the years it was often said that I'll never grow up. At this point in my life, it's too late to worry about growing up. You'll just have to excuse me for enjoying my life as it is.

[mc2]

men attracted to "assertive women" are in fact regressing to childhood to seek a boy-mother type relationship where mother tells the boy what to do and how to do it, even some verbal smacks now and then to keep him a good boy.

Maybe you're right. Over the years it was often said that I'll never grow up. At this point in my life, it's too late to worry about growing up. You'll just have to excuse me for enjoying my life as it is.

no worries, we all have our indulgences in life.

[Junglejerk]

I really like reading this topic.

[Boo]

(mc2 @ 2009-03-14 05:19:15) *

men attracted to "assertive women" are in fact regressing to childhood to seek a boy-mother type relationship where mother tells the boy what to do and how to do it, even some verbal smacks now and then to keep him a good boy.

So then by using your theory....men who don't like assertive women are scared to have their authority challenged so seek a women who will defer to them to prevent fragile egos from getting broken but hide it by insulting women who don't' need to defer or act submissive to achieve their goals

See how that works, someone posts a stupid argument & I counter with an equally stupid argument to prove the point of how the first argument was so stupid

If you don't like a women who is able & unafraid to speak her mind then that is your choice but try to understand that being assertive isn't the same as being a substitute mother, maybe you would regress to a child like state when confronted with an assertive women but plenty of other men are still quite capable of remaining masculine & manly around women who are

[BigSnake]

Yes, during my stay in the land of smile I to have came across a few WHimpy dudes, Mom wore the Pants and carry a big stick, sad and so sorry for a dude like that.

[Boo]

the thread starter was a man & 99% of this forum consists of men posting. The rules specifying women is in place due to the inability of many posters to understand that not flaming any members also include women.

The rest of your op has nothing to do with the topic at hand, which btw was a positive comment on thai women which was a nice balance to the numerous topics that end up slagging them off & afaics this post is just another attempt to slag off women for no discernible reason that your own issues with them, thus proving the need for the rule highlighted.

If you have further comment about the rules then please raise them to admin at support (at) thaivisa.com.

[Boo]

several female posters, myself & sbk for example, did pull the op up on that. It is great to have the rare thread in praise of thai women but i for one found it needless to do so at the expense of thai men (in the op) sorry if I sounded harsh before but I have been doing this for nearly 6 years & I really have read it all so tend to have a short fuse on the whole men are/women are posts.

[TaoNow]

Not sure if directly related to OP's post but...

A while back I went to Sri Wichai Hospital (Thonburi branch near 3 Yaek Fai Chai) for a rabies vaccination. I was sitting in the waiting area to be called up and I realized that something about the place seemed unusual. Then I spotted it: Every staff person in the hospital, from the cleaner, to the receptionist, to the medical registrar, to the nurses, doctors, pharmacists, and accountant, were (you guessed it) women.

The care I received was prompt, efficient, excellent, and with a smile.

[JimsKnight]

Yet again when confronted with a problem, it is being left to the female gender to assert their authority and get some action.

Far too often I have seen the men here will knuckle their forehead and give it 'Yes, Sir. Three bags full, Sir.' when dealing with staff in offices or shops and other places. But get a woman to go in there and sort the problem and she generally does. It seems the women have the balls round here and the gumption too. The same on the telephone. A man will often come back having agreed to whatever he was told by the person on the other end.

I needed a letter to show my address here - in the end a secretary of the Amphur sorted it.

I needed someone to sort out a problem with the Tourist Police. A woman did that too.

A problem with the house. You guessed, a woman on the phone to sort it and get some action.

Latest problem is with an engineer fobbing off a male friend who called, with lame excuses and has done so for 3 weeks now. I phoned a female and it is being sorted now.

All these and many other problems I've seen over the years that needed someone who can speak Thai and I have tried getting male friends to sort them, but each time they come back with some sad excuse such as, 'Another week.' Not today.' 'No can get.' etc.

Not only for myself either. Living with family in the past, it was always the women who seemed to get the job done, be it a funeral, a house problem or whatever.

Thank heavens for Thai female friends!!

Yes, the emasculated male of the west certainly needs either a set of nuts or a dominating woman to hold his pants up.

Thankfully I escaped / rejected the whole feminazi bs that was rife in the 1980s - 2000s

[mc2]

men attracted to "assertive women" are in fact regressing to childhood to seek a boy-mother type relationship where mother tells the boy what to do and how to do it, even some verbal smacks now and then to keep him a good boy.

I disagree. I rather like a woman who can stand with me as an equal. Assertive enough to make her opinions known and let me know if she thinks I'm getting ready to shoot myself in the foot, and thick-skinned enough to tolerate the same from me. I don't want someone so timid that I overpower her, and not someone so bullish that she's domineering. Neither in front, nor behind, but beside me. And... headed in the same general direction.

communicating clearly and her feelings clearly doesn't have to equal "assertive". just ask her to speak normally and if the guy has good listening skills there is no need to be "assertive".

Neither in front, nor behind, but beside me. And... headed in the same general direction.

sounds nice but reality is different. cars are built with one steering wheel for a reason. if we have 2 we get a crash in no time !

[JimsKnight]

Thank heavens for Thai female friends!!

Seems like you are the one with the problem,so take your balls in your hand and be a man dam_n it.

task: find a way to reach the following goal: someone has to clean the house

select the picture that in your opinion looks like a good strategy to reach that goal:

a)

c)

[henryalleman]

I was mulling over starting a thread on a similar line.... not that Thai women have the balls that ought to belong to Thai men, rather that for a country which attracts so many foreign men looking for women less 'assertive' than their western sisters Thailand nevertheless seems to be brimming with farangs who are in complete fear of the meek and mild Thai woman they came here to meet.

"fear of the meek and mild thai woman".................are you sure,i dont see that at all,i do agree that western men came here looking for "less assertive".imo female liberation of western women that began in the 70's did them no favours in the end,mentally they just became "blokes",and most blokes dont want more blokes,they want a female to be feminine,which does not mean they want a women to be subservient,just more feline(feminine),which imo western women have lost along the way because of the feminista movement.

Glad to see from recent posts that this topic has finally got back on track (although I will de-rail it again at the end of the post)!

As a single female, my experience is that if I have a problem (I emphasise this as I can deal with most other things myself), my female Thai friends will do anything to help and sort it out. Thai men generally can't be bothered if it's going to involve arguing with another Thai. (Something to do with the all important 'face' I expect plus, and this is just my opinion, they're not that bothered about helping a 'farang' ). (Thai husbands to Western women will understandably be more helpful about sorting out problems, it's their problem as well!)

I've also found that male (and most female) farang friends will also go out of their way to help - god bless them!!

Going slightly off topic now to reply to Samuibeachcomber's post - it's obvious to anyone that your problem is not with Western women's 'assertiveness' , but that you need a subservient woman, and few Western women will accept anything less than an equal relationship (unlike their Thai counterparts). Despite your denials, you're deluding yourself if you believe that that Western women are anything like as assertive as Western men! Western women still love being feminine (but not subservient), and the 'women's lib' movement allowed them to have a life apart from that of devoting themselves to their husbands. That is your problem with Western women and it's time you tried a little honest self-evaluation to realise this!

The problem is that many men are mentally too insecure to have an relationship or marriage with an independent woman be it financially, life style or attitude.

But I think you made a little mistake thinking that the life of western women is a lot improved the last 50 years. Yes they have more freedom and so called equal rights. But the price they paid is very high. You should read ( The Female Eunuch, reviewed edition 2007) by Germain Greer and the book 'Women's history of the world' by Marelyn French. In fact every mother should give this books to their teenage daughter and discuss it together.

Needless to say I'm a feminist, someone even called me a Lesbian(LOL)

[henryalleman]

men attracted to "assertive women" are in fact regressing to childhood to seek a boy-mother type relationship where mother tells the boy what to do and how to do it, even some verbal smacks now and then to keep him a good boy.

Men who don't , still like to be mama's little hero who like to get applause for everything he do, in Mama's eye he can do nothing wrong, she pampers him 24/7, even put his clothes ready for him in the morning and clean up his mess behind his back, in this way he is made to believe that he is God's gift to Earth. In short spoiled brats.

[JimsKnight]

Good to see you're seeing everything in black and white.

FN.

[mc2]

men attracted to "assertive women" are in fact regressing to childhood to seek a boy-mother type relationship where mother tells the boy what to do and how to do it, even some verbal smacks now and then to keep him a good boy.

Men who don't , still like to be mama's little hero who like to get applause for everything he do, in Mama's eye he can do nothing wrong, she pampers him 24/7, even put his clothes ready for him in the morning and clean up his mess behind his back, in this way he is made to believe that he is God's gift to Earth. In short spoiled brats.

sounds good, but in this case the man will still have to work hard to meet and maintain her high expectations.

[sbk]

Hmmm, is it me or does this seem like its getting very personal, very nasty? And for a while now there has been nothing in praise of Thai women but rather generalized nastiness towards men and women.

So, in the interests of fairness, I'll give it a few more hours. Keep this up and it will be closed.

[t.s]

one thing I dislike about living in Thailand is having to get my partner to "get things done" when dealing with Thais.

i would prefer to be the one "getting things done" rather than feeling emasculated

its the language barrier.

Wasn't language a part of the Thai studies that you did?

yes but language was not the main component in my Ph.D in Thai Cultural Studies.

sure I can speak enough to get by but its not enough for detailed negotiations, discussions, etc. and in my experience misunderstandings happen far too often.

thanks for that i laughed out loud. how can you even begin to study a living culture without learning to adequately speak the language?

[imaneggspurt]

Thats true, i caught a glimpe of a pair in jenny star bar !

[imaneggspurt]

I was mulling over starting a thread on a similar line.... not that Thai women have the balls that ought to belong to Thai men, rather that for a country which attracts so many foreign men looking for women less 'assertive' than their western sisters Thailand nevertheless seems to be brimming with farangs who are in complete fear of the meek and mild Thai woman they came here to meet.

Ohh, that will strike a nerve in some . .