How Do Thai Males Do It?

[tb86]

So, it seems as tho the OP isn't so concerned with Thai male-female relationships but rather looking for advice on how to cheat on his partner and not get caught?

If so, why not just say so? Why the need to bring in the usual derogatory generalizations about Thai men and women?

sorry, but i thought that was exactly what i was doing? were my intentions not clear to anyone else?

where was i being derogatory to Thai people?

maybe this will help you figure out the idea behind the thread winnie

[WinnieTheKhwai]

I can understand your sentiment, but I do believe Thais are more inclined to have adventures on the side than other countries I'm familiar with. Take for example the Philippines or just about any Western country; if you say you're married and have kids then any kind of flirtation ends right then and there.

to my dislike, i can quote way too many personal experiences to refute that claim.

and I dont think im all that exceptional that would warranty these western men to suddenly depart from their values? to me it would say that it is something they do without much thought.

so how does that make thais, or western any more or less inclined to fidelity?

there maybe some difference in the way its done. but thats all.

Agree. Most Western men would give up fidelity without a thought if they thought they could get away with it.

The difference is that most Western women would not be interested in a married man. (An affair possibly, but they wouldn't target him as a b/f or for marriage)

Yes, that's precisely what I meant, though I didn't make it clear enough; outside Thailand I think women are far less likely to continue or start a flirtation if they know the man is happily married.

[Royk]

Don't be fooled..they don't.

I know of two Thais who thought they were putting something over on their wife. They were both caught, and are now divorced (or at least not living with their ex partner). Don't believe all the cr@p you hear about "Mia Nois" on the street. Some Thais get away with it for a while, but most are eventually caught at it. And their wifves are no more forgiving than Farang women are in the same situation.

When I originally "hooked up" with my Thai Girlfriend, she made it very clear. If I ever fooled around with another woman, she told me to make sure it was really good. Because if she caught me, she would make sure it was physically impossible after she was through.

Slash, slice and dice?

[WinnieTheKhwai]

if you rephrase and ask whether fidelity and cheating exist in thai society, of course that is not something I can deny

but to talk about fidelity and cheating being part of thai culture is something i have to refute. or that it is something that is accepted, again something I have to disagree with

I can understand your sentiment, but I do believe Thais are more inclined to have adventures on the side than other countries I'm familiar with. Take for example the Philippines or just about any Western country; if you say you're married and have kids then any kind of flirtation ends right then and there. In Thailand however if anything it'll encourage the flirtation if not immediate then in the very short term. I see this time and again. Now, do Thai people ACCEPT that their partner has a fling on the side: no way, by and large, unless it's a severely unequal relationship. But are they more open to having a fling themselves: absolutely, and that goes for both men and women. (No, not all men and women)

Most arent foolish enough to think that there gonna get away with it for long, its dam_n hard work to keep 2 at once bro, be careful what you wish for you may just get it.. If your dead set on having a full time chick on the side you better never let her know where you live, work or hang out normaly, get a second sim card with a seperate phone number, only use cash,

Did anyone read the original post? It's not about having a relationship on the side, the OP has a highly jealous partner who gives him the third degree and waterboarding when he as much as wants to go have a drink with a friend! All the other stuff such as if he actually 'strays' is nice banter but not the issue the original poster raised: How to have some time for male bonding, having drinks and hitting the bars when having a highly jealous and suspicious spouse. I bet that's not a scenario many here are too unfamiliar with??

umm... are you sure you read the first 5 or 6 of the op's posts maybe take a few minute and re read them.....

Yeah, but I think the OP is a bit confused himself, mainly his assumption that Thai men don't have a worry in the world to have fun on the side. I'm saying that with a jealous partner it's actually immaterial if the man actually/factually strays or not. The more basic issue is of jealousy, trust and respect for each other. Men SHOULD be able to go out, drink beer, play golf, hang out with friends, watch the football, etc, etc without this leading to seismic events domestically.

Edited April 27, 2009 by WinnieTheKhwai

[arnoldjr]

If you are old enough to have a girl friend and you have to ask a bunch of guys and gals how to cheat on her don't go there it will not work and more than likely you will get caught. Cheating and lying seems to be one of those thing we start developing at a young age and by the time we have a girl friend we really care about and donot want to hurt our skills at lying and cheating are honed to such a fine edge she will never find out and be hurt.

Sorry Dave I think you are a loser.

Agreed.

[a2396]

My guess is that the fellas get the fillies to fall so much in love... that the fellas are essentially able to call the shots. In the language of the street... the Thai male pimp hand is strong.

I think that's about right. I have seen several like this. The BF beats them up & knocks them around many times, has other GF's & she keeps going back to him and of course he has no money in most cases. This stuff is out of fason with western women, but not here.

[a2396]

If I go out at night, my Thai significant other will ask where I am going. Do Thai males gf's and wife's do the same? Do they not answer? Do they lie about where they are going? Everyone always talks about how Thai males have multiple women and how Thai women accept this as a part of being in a relationship with a Thai male, but I have never gotten even the faintest hint from my lady that its ok or acceptable. I don't want to have to lie about where I am going or be paranoid of being caught. I really just want to know how Thai males handle it. I am not comfortable enough with any Thai males in real life to ask them directly. I really want to start taking advantage of this aspect of Thai culture but as farang I suppose I am lost at how it works. Do wife's and gf's really not ask where you are going at 9:30 pm or why your phone magically turns off for an hour and a half during this time?

And in regards to second wives and giks, that would take even more time away from your partner. How do you get away with it so to speak?

Thanks.

Don't be fooled..they don't.

I know of two Thais who thought they were putting something over on their wife. They were both caught, and are now divorced (or at least not living with their ex partner). Don't believe all the cr@p you hear about "Mia Nois" on the street. Some Thais get away with it for a while, but most are eventually caught at it. And their wifves are no more forgiving than Farang women are in the same situation.

When I originally "hooked up" with my Thai Girlfriend, she made it very clear. If I ever fooled around with another woman, she told me to make sure it was really good. Because if she caught me, she would make sure it was physically impossible after she was through.

In case you haven't heard, some mis nois are acturall chosen by the existing wife and accepted as such. There are aparently many variations to this. Some acceptable to the existing wife & some not.

[barky]

My take is that Thai guys just automatically lie without thinking about it. They say exactly what the girl wants to hear and they are both happy.

I suspect this is generally true UG, but also, what needs to be considered is that a Thai wife would not stand for infidelity from an alien husband, but would accept (not like) it from a Thai husband.

[a2396]

Thais lie... duh, just like falangs, I watch them both play the same game with women (my Thai and falang guy friends).

My friend (falang) got caught red handed literally with another woman in his room twice (2 different girlfriends) both times they cried... then asked him if HE was going to dump THEM... he said no and that he thought SHE would break up with HIM... she said no... just dont let my friends find out and embarass me. NOT THE SAME AS WESTERN CULTURE AT ALL.

issan girls perhaps?

my girlfriend is from bangkok. I was around her friends too sometimes when we went out because I was staying there for 4 months or so. We didn't go to all the bars all the old western guys go to, we didn't sit with them, we didn't sit with the bar girls, we didn't get to know any issan girls there. When we went to the club or any place, we would be with her friends from bangkok and other 'normal' people from bangkok; 18-25 year olds, living in bangkok all their life, some uni students, some not, some graduated, some working..

basically, what i'm trying to say is - your story might happen with issan girls or other thai girls who have been pampered so much with money and expensive things, but for 'normal' thai girls (from my experience) like <deleted> would that happen.. NO CHANCE. If i was caught like that i would be sent packing - just like in WESTERN CULTURE.

edit: just read the whole topic. To the guy who created this thread - you are a joke.

You've obviously never met my Isaan girl. She'd send me packing with my balls in my mouth. Man....which Isaan girls you hangin' with?

Most Issan girls I know are doing the same amount of cheating as the men, if not more.

[a2396]

someone is watching too much thai soaps

remember that even in the soaps, which are mostly fictious, it never ends well

is it thai culture? certainly not. all my life, Ive never heard or hear anyone being taught in school, at home, or in books, that its ok to cheat on your partner. or to lie.

in fact those are 2 of the 5 sins according to buddhism. (more than 95% of people in thailand are buddhist) something that is taught to every child every day of school.

having 2 wives husbands is in fact illegal in thailand

and before anyone starts talking about me wearing rose-tinted glasses, well then my answer can only be that perhaps Im just not fortunate enough to know a majority of people like the OP's male friends?

PS. just noticed Guesthouse put it more eloquently than me

Many Thais are not legally married in any case. That's for idiot Farangs. A mia noi is not a legal wife, so no problem, if the major wife accepts this.

[a2396]

My take is that Thai guys just automatically lie without thinking about it. They say exactly what the girl wants to hear and they are both happy.

The women do the same, without a doubt. I don't know how anyone believes anything that is said here regarding many romantic issues. It's a joke.

[arnoldjr]

there's always a chance of her catching you and leaving you. if you think its worth it to cheat or you wont get caught, then do it. why not? i've done it, got caught many times and the girl just hung on tighter and got more jealous. seems like she wanted me more, the more i cheated. i even got caught with a girl in my bed and she demanded that the girl went home so she could stay with me. you gotta find the ones that really really love you, or don't have the self esteem to leave you.

Ummm, could it be that she was worried about losing your money?

doubt it, she made more than i did.

[MiG16]

The difference is that most Western women would not be interested in a married man. (An affair possibly, but they wouldn't target him as a b/f or for marriage)

Yes, that's precisely what I meant, though I didn't make it clear enough; outside Thailand I think women are far less likely to continue or start a flirtation if they know the man is happily married.

disagree with that too again based on experience/knowledge of real people.

but what do I know.

out of curiousity though.... an affair as per what you say western women will do , and what the thai women do, whats the difference?

arent both a case of getting involved with a married person, or one that is supposedly in a committed relationship?

does the length of time of the affair on the side makes one ok and the other not?

[BWPattaya]

When I originally "hooked up" with my Thai Girlfriend, she made it very clear. If I ever fooled around with another woman, she told me to make sure it was really good. Because if she caught me, she would make sure it was physically impossible after she was through.

You must have a lovely relationship, built upon the threat of injury to make you behave. Who wears the trousers?

[Ulysses G.]

My take is that Thai guys just automatically lie without thinking about it. They say exactly what the girl wants to hear and they are both happy.

The women do the same, without a doubt. I don't know how anyone believes anything that is said here regarding many romantic issues. It's a joke.

That is true too!