SMEEERE Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 Well in her eyes it seems shes married.( writing dear husband ) ,so what does it matter, dump her, NEXT ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SMEEERE Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 Often a husband is not a legal spouse here as the official registration is never made. It is up to her and him if they consider themselves married. Her passport say Miss or Mrs? My understanding is that a wife can keep her maiden name and the title Miss should she choose to do so. Of course, I could be wrong... but if so, the designation Miss wouldn't mean a whole lot. This is also my understanding. My wife still has the same ID card since before we were married, and has not officially changed her last name. ... but to the OP...does it really matter if she is officially "married" or not...if she's writing letter to her "darling husband"...you have a problem either way. That has to be the point you look at. It is in the wording itself. 'Darling Husband'. These cannot be seen as anything but what they are written as. This has to tell you she loves her husband and that whatever she is doing is related to that. A legal husband or not, she still refers to him as he 'Darling Husband' so why do you feel the need to check on the marriage? Those two words would make me feel conned and want her out of my life as quickly as possible. And thats exactly why i think this is a troll, rediculous,. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ivowatson Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 (edited) That has to be the point you look at. It is in the wording itself. 'Darling Husband'. These cannot be seen as anything but what they are written as. This has to tell you she loves her husband and that whatever she is doing is related to that. A legal husband or not, she still refers to him as he 'Darling Husband' so why do you feel the need to check on the marriage? Those two words would make me feel conned and want her out of my life as quickly as possible. And thats exactly why i think this is a troll, rediculous,. Never ever heard Thai couples call eachother "Darling husband/wife" Edited May 31, 2009 by ivowatson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
getgoin Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 Translate the whole letter for us. Maybe it says, "My darling husband, you are a worthless drunk and I am staying in Australia and getting married again. You have not worked in 5 years, you still live with your parents and you only had money when I gave it to you." This would be the case with about 65% of relationships between Thai and Thai. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birdman Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 I said so already. That "darling/husband" can mean anything. Maybe it's about a friend's husband, maybe about Brat Pitt and...ahm...what's her name?, maybe she is writing about her future darling/husband, meaning the worried Australian, or maybe about another lover, maybe it's about a book, a song, a movie, names of their fish, Berlusconi, Ufos, who knows? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonrakers Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 I have been worrying about the letter as well, the OP could be jumping the gun here. There could be a misunderstanding in the translation here and it could be quite harmless, I'd make absolutely sure first. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mekongmiss Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 I agree with Artisi - a thoroughly unecessary comment which does not reflect well on your character or intelligence. Looks like your lady, and no doubt her Thai man and the relatives are having "fun" with you. It doesn't matter who the experience is with, westerner or Thai, cheating and using someone for residency and then ultimately trying to claim their assets is a nasty act. The guys who are posting here with warnings give good advice, the ones who are making excuses for the woman need to pull their head out of the sand and smell the Som tam. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
asianbravo Posted May 31, 2009 Author Share Posted May 31, 2009 i asked because i want to check my cousin's fiancee who he is madly in love with. i know this is not exactly right but just wanted to make sure he got someone who truly loves him that all and the interaction with her makes me feel she is a person with many hidden secrets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a2396 Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 Hi all , I hope someone can help me , I am here in Australia and I live with my Thai spouse and we are getting to the point where marriage is on the cards but I have recently come across a letter written in Thai that is recent and is written by my spouse to her darling husband . As you can imagine I feel like a fool that this women has used me to get a visa in Australia and I would like to end the relationship if in fact she is married to someone in Thailand. Now my question is , how do I go about confirming if my Thai spouse is married still , is there some sort of Registra search engine that I can use on the internet to find out ? or would I have to go to the Thai embassy here in Australia and request such information (for a large fee no doubt). Hope someone can help me out on this so that I can kick her out and move on with my life. David . HEY.... what is there to check out?? what do you need a kick in the groin too? you have her thoughts in writting!! kick to curb, find another ,Thailand has many ! "Darling husband" tells you her story. Remember 99% village Thais do not register marrage they justs do the monk thing at their homes with the string around the wrist.. done ,married . most villgaers do not register! do not feel a fool you are not the first and not the last and half the Thai girls have Thai husbands ,lovers ,boyfriends at least one if not several! Precisely!!...and you are never likely to know the extent of such relationships. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozdavid Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 Hi all , I hope someone can help me , I am here in Australia and I live with my Thai spouse and we are getting to the point where marriage is on the cards but I have recently come across a letter written in Thai that is recent and is written by my spouse to her darling husband . As you can imagine I feel like a fool that this women has used me to get a visa in Australia and I would like to end the relationship if in fact she is married to someone in Thailand. Now my question is , how do I go about confirming if my Thai spouse is married still , is there some sort of Registra search engine that I can use on the internet to find out ? or would I have to go to the Thai embassy here in Australia and request such information (for a large fee no doubt). Hope someone can help me out on this so that I can kick her out and move on with my life. David . Thanks to everyone for all the great information . I am in a de-facto relationship with this women and we are now going through the final process of her becoming a Permnent Resident here in Australia , so I still have about a month away before a decision is granted in her favour , therefore I would like to phone up the immigration department and tell them that I don't wish to go ahead with getting her the residency but I really want to be sure first. I see from some of the responses that having Miss on a passport or ID card may not mean that she is not married and that she could have just done the monk thing, but overall I would like to do a search with the correct department to see if she has a marriage noted down with the Registra . I would ideally like to find a website that will allow me to do a search online to get this information . As for the whole experience it has not been easy with a thai women but overall it is alot better then being with a western women , I think the best way to be is just have fun with thai women and no commitment . David Hi All , I have finally got the letter translated by a thai agency here in Australia , the gist of the letter was that she had a non legal husband just to satisfy her family wanting her to be married and the letter was in the context of her saying to this man to stop harassing her family when they where in the local town , she also made it clear that it has been over for 4 years and that he should move on. I am so glad that I did not jump the gun and get her kicked out of the country , I feel so much better now that she is not using me for a visa , but when she keeps secrets like this it does not help my parinoia .Thanks for all the great advice from everyone , even the ones that said get her out of my life , I can understand where you are coming from when you say kick her to the curb but it is alot harder to do with out full proof and that fact that you love the women . Just to clear up the misunderstanding about western women vs thai , what I am meaning is that a western women thinks you owe her everything and will give little or nothing in return whilst a thai women will at least give you something in return even if her motives are bad (like getting a visa from you) , now I am in no way saying it is o.k to screw a guy over and use him to get a visa/cash etc , a less of two evils I guess. I would like to trust women but I have had a few bad experiences and I now feel that it is inevitable that men and women will want extra fun outside there relationships as the longer you are together things get dull .It's human nature at the end of the day and it is society that is trying to force the the concepts of one-to-one relationships , alas saying that it still hurts if you think or know that your partner is with someone else. Thanks again to everyone . David Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldsparrow Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 When the Thais officially registered the marriage, the status in the citizen database will change immidiately. Serveral gov agencies can chaek it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozdavid Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 When the Thais officially registered the marriage, the status in the citizen database will change immidiately. Serveral gov agencies can chaek it. Is there a way to check this database via the internet ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meadish_sweetball Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 the status in the citizen database Is there really such a thing as a complete, computerized database over the Thai population? Given that everything seems to be done at the local amphoe offices with paper copies, and starts from the house registration book where information is changed with crossing things out by hand, that is a little surprising. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piglet373 Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 Hi all , I hope someone can help me , I am here in Australia and I live with my Thai spouse and we are getting to the point where marriage is on the cards but I have recently come across a letter written in Thai that is recent and is written by my spouse to her darling husband . As you can imagine I feel like a fool that this women has used me to get a visa in Australia and I would like to end the relationship if in fact she is married to someone in Thailand. Now my question is , how do I go about confirming if my Thai spouse is married still , is there some sort of Registra search engine that I can use on the internet to find out ? or would I have to go to the Thai embassy here in Australia and request such information (for a large fee no doubt). Hope someone can help me out on this so that I can kick her out and move on with my life. David . u found a letter to her husband? is that not enough for you? u aussies r one strange group of boys! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Violet Fonce Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 Can you ask the family's neighbor? or any rumor from the village gossipers..... of how many sinsot the family did receive before yours? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldsparrow Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 the status in the citizen database Is there really such a thing as a complete, computerized database over the Thai population? Given that everything seems to be done at the local amphoe offices with paper copies, and starts from the house registration book where information is changed with crossing things out by hand, that is a little surprising. Yes, there are many databased maintained eventhough many local offices are not online. All local offices of many Ministries send the edited infor on line or mostly, hard copy (fax or mail) to be processed by central office of their respective Ministries. I myself saw this kind of input (not citizen infor), they employ several dozen typists and there really was hundreds kilo of paper, hard copy sent from provincial office. For the house I have direct experience. They change the name, the new information appear on line before I took the copy to be edited by hand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldsparrow Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 When the Thais officially registered the marriage, the status in the citizen database will change immidiately. Serveral gov agencies can chaek it. Is there a way to check this database via the internet ? No sir, not for the public, just for official use. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geekfreaklover Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 If she argues a lot and suffers from 'headaches' in the bedroom it's normally a good sign that she is married. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackdanielsesq Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 You guys are all over-thinking the problem. Pray she belongs to someone else and in a few years, when you are tired of her, she will go and pester whomever for alimony or support. All marriages are doomed to failure, period. The M word is a female conspiracy. Practicing is way cooler than changing diapers and pushing perambulators. You both entered into a business relationship - deal with it. Enjoy her for what or who she is - not some preconceived notion of what she isnt - I am sure y'all didnt sign prenups before you first sought sanctity with each other. Bet any money the womenfolk are the ones who moved the relationship from lust to its current status. BR>Jack Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gk10002000 Posted June 3, 2009 Share Posted June 3, 2009 Hi all , I hope someone can help me , I am here in Australia and I live with my Thai spouse and we are getting to the point where marriage is on the cards but I have recently come across a letter written in Thai that is recent and is written by my spouse to her darling husband . As you can imagine I feel like a fool that this women has used me to get a visa in Australia and I would like to end the relationship if in fact she is married to someone in Thailand. Now my question is , how do I go about confirming if my Thai spouse is married still , is there some sort of Registra search engine that I can use on the internet to find out ? or would I have to go to the Thai embassy here in Australia and request such information (for a large fee no doubt). Hope someone can help me out on this so that I can kick her out and move on with my life. David . Thanks to everyone for all the great information . I am in a de-facto relationship with this women and we are now going through the final process of her becoming a Permnent Resident here in Australia , so I still have about a month away before a decision is granted in her favour , therefore I would like to phone up the immigration department and tell them that I don't wish to go ahead with getting her the residency but I really want to be sure first. I see from some of the responses that having Miss on a passport or ID card may not mean that she is not married and that she could have just done the monk thing, but overall I would like to do a search with the correct department to see if she has a marriage noted down with the Registra . I would ideally like to find a website that will allow me to do a search online to get this information . As for the whole experience it has not been easy with a thai women but overall it is alot better then being with a western women , I think the best way to be is just have fun with thai women and no commitment . David My sympathies and hopes for the best. Thais are a bit unique to other cultures. But, the situation of a woman leaving her native land to move to the US or UK or Australia or anyplace far from home is common. Lots of confilicts of interest possible as material things are involved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tango7 Posted June 4, 2009 Share Posted June 4, 2009 Just get the letter translated and after that ask her what the letter is all about. Then you will know if she plays games with you. I would not rely on this Ms. / Mrs. title at all. Don't sweet talk yourself into this... Get rid of her before its too late. You're the one who needs the avatar title of "intelligent member" ... not the other chap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
timinchina Posted June 5, 2009 Share Posted June 5, 2009 The designation on her ID card will tell you.Nangsao, means Mrs - married. Not right says my wife, นาง this is Mrs. Wonder which it says on her ID card then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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