For My 1000 Post I'll Ask A Question

[IanForbes]

Is it possible to love more than one woman at same time? Or, for that matter, is it possible for a woman to love more than one man at the same time?

I know that I can love a child, a sibling, my parents or even my friends (of the same sex) all at the same time. Why would it not be possible to love one or more women at the same time? Didn't the ancient King of Siam have many wives? They couldn't all have just been sexual concubines.

I also understand that once sex is involved it changes things entirely. Some people are very jealous and can't tolerate anyone else with their spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend even if no sex is involved.

I have to believe that there are many different types of love. I have a genuine affection for 5 different ladies in Thailand. And, I know that they DO like me in return. I know it's not just a money paid for services rendered type of thing. Two lady friends (different than the 5 mentioned above) are always saying "I love you", but I find that hard to believe judging by some of the things they do.

But, maybe I'm just confusing "like" with "love". Only twice in my life have I ever been totally infatuated with a woman to point where I couldn't think of anything else. But, in both situations that infatuation only lasted about a year before the bloom wore off the rose.

One thing I'm always very conscious of is being totally honest with everyone. I may not always tell the whole truth, but I never tell a lie.

[bkkjames]

Ian, you may ask the mods to move this to the women's section to get some insightful responses.

[Tywais]

but I find that hard to believe judging by some of the things they do.

I have a saying "It's not what they say, it's what they do that's the defining factor".

[cpofc]

If I were American and lived in the US, it would be right about now that I would call upon the 5th Amendment.

[bkkjames]

If I were American and lived in the US, it would be right about now that I would call upon the 5th Amendment.

then it is a good thing the op is a canadian who lives in thailand.

[imaneggspurt]

I love everyone ! ..whos next ?

[Thaddeus]

I love everyone ! ..whos next ?

Anyone with a good milk supply, it is your 2nd Birthday after all

[jackdanielsesq]

I thought that was normal?!

BR>Jack

[cpofc]

my question would have been 'Why restrict it to one?'

To all the girls I've loved before

Who travelled in and out my door

I'm glad they came along

I dedicate this song

To all the girls I've loved before

To all the girls I once caressed

And may I say I've held the best

For helping me to grow

I owe a lot I know

To all the girls I've loved before

The winds of change are always blowing

And every time I try to stay

The winds of change continue blowing

And they just carry me away

To all the girls who shared my life

Who now are someone else's wives

I'm glad they came along

I dedicate this song

To all the girls I've loved before

To all the girls who cared for me

Who filled my nights with ecstasy

They live within my heart

I'll always be a part

Of all the girls I've loved before

The winds of change are always blowing

And every time I try to stay

The winds of change continue blowing

And they just carry me away

To all the girls we've loved before

Who travelled in and out our doors

We're glad they came along

We dedicate this song

To all the girls we've loved before

To all the girls we've loved before

Who travelled in and out our doors

We're glad they came along

We dedicate this song

To all the girls we've loved before

[pattaya_girl]

Impossible.

[Bobsyouruncle]

The question is not relevant, it’s your 1001^st post.

[BEENTHEREDONETHAT]

I don't think it is uncommon for Thai men to have a wife and a couple gf on the side. The wife usually knows it but for some reason accepts it. Hard to say if he really loves all of them, or just likes a change of pace.

[webfact]

Impossible.

Are you sure... ?

[Harcourt]

Definitely a troll alert.

but philosophically interesting.

It depends on what your definition of "love" is.

Putting aside the different "types" of love such as for a sibling, parent, child, friend.... we can assume you mean non-platonic "love".

It still depends on your own definition of "love".

Can gender X love a Y and an X at the same time? (and vice versa).

[neverdie]

I read the topic title & I thought to myself, I BET THIS IS IAN FORBES! No Shittt.

[WaiWai]

I don't think it is uncommon for Thai men to have a wife and a couple gf on the side. The wife usually knows it but for some reason accepts it. Hard to say if he really loves all of them, or just likes a change of pace.

... and to what extent is our concept of "love" shaped by culture? and our behaviour?

Is there a "true" (sexual/romantic) love that transcends all cultural boundaries ... is "universal" ... or do people from different cultures tend to hold different views of what "love" is?

I expect some foreigners would say they think the Thai man could love each of the women, though perhaps in different ways; while other foreigners would say that it's mainly a case of opting for a "change of pace" in a culture which accepts such arrangements.

What would Thai men say? Thai women?

[popmybubble]

I don't think I would have enough energy to love more than one person in a non-platonic sense. I tend to be completely consumed by a single person whereby it doesn't really enter my head to think of someone else in the same way. A crush perhaps, but not to the extent where I would be interested in taking it further, as long as I am content in the relationship. I would never go behind my partner's back.

Also I love to be super close to someone and don't really have time to share myself with a lot of people at any one time. I suppose as a result of this I have few real friends and not many aquaintances.

I'm not a very sociable person either and am quite selfish with my emotions, often resulting in people that don't know me very well finding me insensitive or cold. My family are used to me being a bitch

[yabaaaa]

Ian, you may ask the mods to move this to the women's section to get some insightful responses.

Please be realistic

[Harcourt]

I don't think I would have enough energy to love more than one person in a non-platonic sense. I tend to be completely consumed by a single person whereby it doesn't really enter my head to think of someone else in the same way. A crush perhaps, but not to the extent where I would be interested in taking it further, as long as I am content in the relationship. I would never go behind my partner's back.

Also I love to be super close to someone and don't really have time to share myself with a lot of people at any one time. I suppose as a result of this I have few real friends and not many aquaintances.

I'm not a very sociable person either and am quite selfish with my emotions, often resulting in people that don't know me very well finding me insensitive or cold. My family are used to me being a bitch

Yeah, I know what you're saying.....but if there are many types of platonic love, surely there are many types of non-platonic love? Each having a different priority (priority does not equate to value in this sense....it's just the best word I can think of off the cuff).

Such as a politically arranged marriage,

[WaiWai]

pattaya_girl: Impossible

http://www.rhapsody.com/elvis-presley/live...ble/lyrics.html

[Patsycat]

Ask G54 he seems to be in the same dilemma..

[toybits]

Our Catholic priest once said that love is infinite. There is no limit to your love. You may love your wife with all your heart, and love your son with all your heart. You may love your loyal pooch with all your heart and still have love left over of other people. This could include a second woman.

Question is - will that be alright with the missis?

Men it seems tend to be polygamous. It is my Catholic upbringing that makes demands on my remaining monogamous.

[G54]

I'd like to love more than one at a time but the threat of my bodily extinction makes me not do so

[Datsun240Z]

I think why not? There are so many lovely woman, but for me, I can't bare in mind to be with different woman, because their will be always jalousy from the other woman. So I just stick with one, and the rest is acceptable to look at.

[eek]

I don't think it is uncommon for Thai men to have a wife and a couple gf on the side. The wife usually knows it but for some reason accepts it. Hard to say if he really loves all of them, or just likes a change of pace.

... and to what extent is our concept of "love" shaped by culture? and our behaviour?

Is there a "true" (sexual/romantic) love that transcends all cultural boundaries ... is "universal" ... or do people from different cultures tend to hold different views of what "love" is?

I expect some foreigners would say they think the Thai man could love each of the women, though perhaps in different ways; while other foreigners would say that it's mainly a case of opting for a "change of pace" in a culture which accepts such arrangements.

What would Thai men say? Thai women?

With regards to the idea of a Mia Noi, just one thing that might be something to think about. In Thai culture it seems that divorce is a bit taboo, particularly for women/wives, yes? So, for a husband and wife that built up a life together, had kids together, but that no longer love each other in an intimate way (but that dont fight or have much problems. Just that their love for each other is more platonic now), then taking on a second instead of divorce may be thought of as more considerate to the wife. Now..i dont know how that works for the wife regarding any desires she may have sexually. But, for the wife who doesnt want divorce but is no longer interested in her husband in an intimate way, and vice versa, the idea of a mia noi is one solution. People still have needs even when a marriage is no longer intimate or sexual. Again..with regards to the wife..im not sure how it works..ie if she wishes to have a lover. But, depending on the man of course, a second wife may be much preferable to both the husband and wife than him having a lot of casual encounters.

Certainly, in that case, i would say the man loves both the wife and the mia noi. He has equal responsibility to them both. Just that the love for his first wife developed and changed.

Of course, some men may take on more than one mai noi plus still have an intimate relationship with his wife, so that is different again. Im just showing an alternative example. People usually focus on the sex side of things, thinking the husband is being unfaithful etc. When, it may actually be something mutually agreed and positive for both parties.

[t.s]

I'd like to love more than one at a time but the threat of my bodily extinction makes me not do so

yes, and the threat of your bodily excretion deters the rest of us.

[slapout]

I would answer the original question, Yes. I think if we asked ' Could you hate more than one person at a time?' everyone could think of a instance where this is not only possible but probable. So why would not the opposite also be true?

[imaneggspurt]

I love everyone ! ..whos next ?

Anyone with a good milk supply, it is your 2nd Birthday after all

Oh, thankyou,.........somebody noticed !

[Carib]

Yes Ian, it is possible, the same goes for men...That is why we all love you.....

[manuchaomk]

Is it possible to love more than one woman at same time? Or, for that matter, is it possible for a woman to love more than one man at the same time?

of course ...and it's exactly what happens for 99% of the people living in this world.

The word Love is a dangerous and create a lot of misunderstoods...like between thai people & farangs the sentence"I miss you".

If Love means share discussions, have some great and protected sex, do activities together....let's go....

I read (source: survey made by Bangkok Post on January, 2003) that in Thailand...

..every 10 Thai couple (married), 8 of them (most thai men than thai women) do sex with other women 2 time/ week !

It means (in my personal point of view) that i.ex. in Thailand, the bad reputation created during the past years...has directly influenced Thai people.

I think in Europe i.ex. is quite the same...but I don't have official souces to support this theory. The big difference between Europe and Thailand i.ex. it's that the word "TABU" has a different interpretation