Adoption Problem

[mca]

My friend has a problem which he asked my advice on but seeing as my daughter is my natural one with my Thai wife I couldn't be much help. I wonder if  the folks here could kindly give some input.

He has been married to his Thai wife for 4 years and she has a 7 year old daughter from her previous Thai husband. He wants to go through the process of officially adopting his step daughter but her ex husband is making waves.

The ex husband abandoned my friend's wife and daughter when the child was a toddler. Since then he has had no contact with the child whatsover and hasn't contributed at all financially to the upbringing his daughter. My friend has been the sole provider for the stepdaughter and needless to say she considers him to be her real "dad"

My friend's wife contacted her ex husband to inform him of their intentions and he simply refused to allow it despite having had no input in his daughter's life at all. It's not a case (as I have known before) of him wanting some financial "settlement" to allow the adoption to take place. He's an upper level government officer of fair means. He's simply being bloody minded.

What concerns my friend is if the tragic situation of his wife passing away or the like occured then he would have no legal claim over his stepdaughter whom he idolises as if she were his own.

Two questions please.

Couldnybody supply a link to the latest adoption requirements for a westerner with a Thai spouse wishing to adopt and live in Thailand?

Is there such a thing as a law on abandonment in Thailand where after a period of time the natural father relinquishes any right to have a say in the welfare of his child? 

Sorry but i'm completely clueless on such matters

Thanks

[Mario2008]

Question is if the biological father and the mother were ever married to each other at the amphur. If they only had a ceremony the father would only be the egal father if he registered the birth himself at the amphur.

If they were legaly married than it is case to to check if the mother holds sole custody. Probably not, as most they people tend to keep joint custody.

If they have joint custody, the mother can petition the court for sole custody. For this contact a lawyer, like isaan lawyers.

(By the way, it is also possible for the mother to claim child support from the father by petitioning the court.)

[mca]

Thanks for the swift response Mario. Much appreciated.

[johnnymoretti]

With all due respect to the myriad of great minds within this forum, this may be one for a legal respresentative to answer. Though you may get some information that can curtail any anxiety or subdue any feelings of not gaining adoption, the information you may get regarding this important issue may be well-intended, but erroneous.

I would have your friend, along with someone he trusts and speaks both English and Thai well as moral support during counseling, to seek legal help in this matter. It would be of grave consequences if information on this forum were to lead to a proceeding without legal knowledge, perhaps even angering the biological father even more and subsequent denial of progress in your friend's endeavor.

If the poster above has any creedence to the statement regarding marriage and legal custody, then perhaps he can site this in legal terms, or at least direct you to such information.

I wish your friend well. I'm sure he loves this little girl as his own blood. But, because she is not, the battle waged will be tough. And so it warrants a good legal team and proper approach. After all, this can be the beginning of his impact on the future of this little girl.

Good luck!

[Thongkorn]

Usualy from what i have been told ,the childs father has rights over the child more than the mother.Its sad because a child can live without a father but not so good without a mother.I think so money changing hads may just resolve the problem , Thai men see this sort of situationas just another tool to barate the ex , with no thought for the child.I have a simular thing going on My wifes ex who she has not had any contact with for 7 years or contributed to ther up keep of her children will not give permision for the children to leave Thailand for a better life. Money number one , I think

[venturalaw]

My friend has a problem which he asked my advice on but seeing as my daughter is my natural one with my Thai wife I couldn't be much help. I wonder if  the folks here could kindly give some input.

He has been married to his Thai wife for 4 years and she has a 7 year old daughter from her previous Thai husband. He wants to go through the process of officially adopting his step daughter but her ex husband is making waves.

The ex husband abandoned my friend's wife and daughter when the child was a toddler. Since then he has had no contact with the child whatsover and hasn't contributed at all financially to the upbringing his daughter. My friend has been the sole provider for the stepdaughter and needless to say she considers him to be her real "dad"

My friend's wife contacted her ex husband to inform him of their intentions and he simply refused to allow it despite having had no input in his daughter's life at all. It's not a case (as I have known before) of him wanting some financial "settlement" to allow the adoption to take place. He's an upper level government officer of fair means. He's simply being bloody minded.

What concerns my friend is if the tragic situation of his wife passing away or the like occured then he would have no legal claim over his stepdaughter whom he idolises as if she were his own.

Two questions please.

Couldnybody supply a link to the latest adoption requirements for a westerner with a Thai spouse wishing to adopt and live in Thailand?

Is there such a thing as a law on abandonment in Thailand where after a period of time the natural father relinquishes any right to have a say in the welfare of his child? 

Sorry but i'm completely clueless on such matters

Thanks

Mario is correct. The bottom line is as distasteful as it is to many, when parties do not agree, a court of law is the only means to resolution. Being that the biological father has some prominence, and I assume is Thai, the face-saving factor may play a part and therefore you are in for a battle. But, it's a battle certainly worth winning. I've been through a few of these professionally in the States. Tell your friend that he must KNOW that what he is doing is for the best interest of the minor child (as it sounds as though it is under these circumstances) and stick by him as a friend. He and his wife will require all of the support available. He sounds as though he is honorable. I wish your friend well.

[mca]

Thanks very much for the input folks.

[hansnl]

My friend has a problem which he asked my advice on but seeing as my daughter is my natural one with my Thai wife I couldn't be much help. I wonder if  the folks here could kindly give some input.

He has been married to his Thai wife for 4 years and she has a 7 year old daughter from her previous Thai husband. He wants to go through the process of officially adopting his step daughter but her ex husband is making waves.

The ex husband abandoned my friend's wife and daughter when the child was a toddler. Since then he has had no contact with the child whatsover and hasn't contributed at all financially to the upbringing his daughter. My friend has been the sole provider for the stepdaughter and needless to say she considers him to be her real "dad"

My friend's wife contacted her ex husband to inform him of their intentions and he simply refused to allow it despite having had no input in his daughter's life at all. It's not a case (as I have known before) of him wanting some financial "settlement" to allow the adoption to take place. He's an upper level government officer of fair means. He's simply being bloody minded.

What concerns my friend is if the tragic situation of his wife passing away or the like occured then he would have no legal claim over his stepdaughter whom he idolises as if she were his own.

Two questions please.

Couldnybody supply a link to the latest adoption requirements for a westerner with a Thai spouse wishing to adopt and live in Thailand?

Is there such a thing as a law on abandonment in Thailand where after a period of time the natural father relinquishes any right to have a say in the welfare of his child? 

Sorry but i'm completely clueless on such matters

Thanks

I went through the adoption process with two of my wife's children.

Her ex died some years ago, so I did not have the problem of an alive and kicking natural father.

Even so, it took 16 months, and that only because a telephone call to the adoption office by someone in the judiciary.

However, I gather if the natural father is still alive, you need his consent.

Because of his position, as you describe it, to take away his rights, would be a big loss of face.

And he will proabably fight it, all the way.

That said, I gather the mother can do something about it, her getting sole custody, as a first step.

There is a law in place about the father, or the mother, loosing custody completely if, and only if, it can be proved that no care was taken at all, in this case by the father.

But, I also gather, this route seems to be a long way.

I advise you to contact the Government Adoption Bureau in Bangkok.

Make an appointment for a talk, take all paperwork with you, also of the natural father.

And just hope you will get a sympathetic ear there.

I know for a fact those people are not against farang adopting Thai children.

And an advise how to do things, is free.

I have now read all the posts above, and most of what I said has already been said.

However, I guess I have some on hand experience.

The thing is the Adoption Bureau is where you will end up eventually.

And I gather from a long session with the comite ultimately deciding the adoption that they will gladly assist you or advise you.

So, before you start a legal battle with the financial burden it will bring, ask advise from the people who know what to do, becasue they handle very many cases of so called "soft adoption".

This being an adoption of a child where one or both natural parents are still alive.

The help of lawyers might be needed eventually, but maybe the Bureau can help you.

Edited July 27, 2009 by hansnl

[Livinginexile]

If some bloke wanted to adopt my children I would say "no way" too!

Actually by the mere sugestion he would be putting himself in very real danger!

It's amazing, these guys think they can just march into a third world country and take another mans child!

[Old Man River]

If some bloke wanted to adopt my children I would say "no way" too!

Actually by the mere sugestion he would be putting himself in very real danger!

It's amazing, these guys think they can just march into a third world country and take another mans child!

Assuming what the OP wrote is completely true, the guy's friend would hardly be marching into a third world country and taking another man's child.

What the OP wrote:

The ex husband abandoned my friend's wife and daughter when the child was a toddler. Since then he has had no contact with the child whatsover and hasn't contributed at all financially to the upbringing his daughter. My friend has been the sole provider for the stepdaughter and needless to say she considers him to be her real "dad"

[venturalaw]

If some bloke wanted to adopt my children I would say "no way" too!

Actually by the mere sugestion he would be putting himself in very real danger!

It's amazing, these guys think they can just march into a third world country and take another mans child!

When a step-father provides for a child that has been abandoned by the biological father, the step-father should receive nothing but praise, not some moronic remark about marching into a third world country to take another man's child. What an ignorant comment.

[Livinginexile]

If some bloke wanted to adopt my children I would say "no way" too!

Actually by the mere sugestion he would be putting himself in very real danger!

It's amazing, these guys think they can just march into a third world country and take another mans child!

Assuming what the OP wrote is completely true, the guy's friend would hardly be marching into a third world country and taking another man's child.

What the OP wrote:

The ex husband abandoned my friend's wife and daughter when the child was a toddler. Since then he has had no contact with the child whatsover and hasn't contributed at all financially to the upbringing his daughter. My friend has been the sole provider for the stepdaughter and needless to say she considers him to be her real "dad"

That is all well and good!

My ex-wife in Australia re married but her new husband did not want to adopt my children.

What would YOUR answer be if some bloke came along and asked the same question?

Why not be a step dad?

[Livinginexile]

If some bloke wanted to adopt my children I would say "no way" too!

Actually by the mere sugestion he would be putting himself in very real danger!

It's amazing, these guys think they can just march into a third world country and take another mans child!

When a step-father provides for a child that has been abandoned by the biological father, the step-father should receive nothing but praise, not some moronic remark about marching into a third world country to take another man's child. What an ignorant comment.

I'd like to see your "moronic remark" if someone came along and asked you if they could adopt your children.

Wouldn't be so moronic then would it?

We know nothing of the fathers side of this story.

Why can't he just be a step-dad? does he want to aduct this child to another country?