My wife (Thai) and I married (and happy) for 7 years now.

We have 1 son and a daughter that is not mine. She is 10 years old now and calls me "Dad".

When I met my wife I was been told that the father of the child was killed in a car accident 2-3 months before she was born and that they're hasn’t been married.

I crossed through her birth certificate that other day and noticed that the father's name and I.D number are on it.

Can it be? Doesn’t it should say that he passed away?

Or maybe the whole story is not true...

I will add that I'm not looking for to confront my wife about this (after all, the child believe the same story over the years and I don't wish to cause her any sorrow.

The reason I'm asking is that I'm thinking to legally become her father and adopt her and wondering if it will cause any problems if the father is still alive somewhere.

Thanks for any help.

My wife (Thai) and I married (and happy) for 7 years now.

We have 1 son and a daughter that is not mine. She is 10 years old now and calls me "Dad".

When I met my wife I was been told that the father of the child was killed in a car accident 2-3 months before she was born and that they're hasn’t been married.

I crossed through her birth certificate that other day and noticed that the father's name and I.D number are on it.

Can it be? Doesn’t it should say that he passed away?

Or maybe the whole story is not true...

I will add that I'm not looking for to confront my wife about this (after all, the child believe the same story over the years and I don't wish to cause her any sorrow.

The reason I'm asking is that I'm thinking to legally become her father and adopt her and wondering if it will cause any problems if the father is still alive somewhere.

Thanks for any help.

It can be;or not.For sure it can be done in Thailand if your wife oiled the wheels.

About the adoption:yes ,you'll have problems.

If you send me a private message with dads full name and ID number, I'll get back to you within a week or so with confirmation or not of his death.

While I want in no way to suggest what you have been told is not true, I have to tell you that the amount of times I have heard the car accident story, only to then find out there is no truth to it, is more times over the years than I have fingers on both hands. Having said that, there are also occassions on which the story has turned out to be bang on 100% true - and car accidents are indeed a big killer of folk in Thailand, in fact they are right a the top of the list of causes for accidental deaths, and far far more so than happens in Europe.

So it's plausible, and if you are thinking of adoption you would be best placed to verfiy the situation one way or the other, independantly, if you have any doubts.

As for adoption - it's not easy in Thailand.

Prepare yourself for a lot of paperwork and due dilligence examination from the authroties. The rules are strict, and if dad is alive then I think you could be in for a battle. Thailand has gone to great efforts to avoid earning the reputation that many other South East Asian countries have for corruption in its child welfare system associated with Westerners adopting children. The downside is, while it has certainly put a stop to the "trading" of babies for silly amounts of money, it has also made it very difficult for genuine folk and genuine scoial welfare officials.

My wife (Thai) and I married (and happy) for 7 years now.

We have 1 son and a daughter that is not mine. She is 10 years old now and calls me "Dad".

When I met my wife I was been told that the father of the child was killed in a car accident 2-3 months before she was born and that they're hasn’t been married.

I crossed through her birth certificate that other day and noticed that the father's name and I.D number are on it.

Can it be? Doesn’t it should say that he passed away?

Or maybe the whole story is not true...

I will add that I'm not looking for to confront my wife about this (after all, the child believe the same story over the years and I don't wish to cause her any sorrow.

The reason I'm asking is that I'm thinking to legally become her father and adopt her and wondering if it will cause any problems if the father is still alive somewhere.

Thanks for any help.

Firstly, please beware of those who offer to obtain information for you. These are only people who know where to ask and looking for an earner.

Being a professional genealogist I know that in the UK details of the father has to be quoted on a birth certificate including if any parent is deceased. But in Thailand, not sure.

What you do is, visit an amphur office and enquire in there. You will find them very helpful and most speak reasonable English. Perhaps they may give you details of the father.

Failing this, the ID number of the father is easily traceable. Visit any Thai lawyer who will have access to public records, and for a small fee is able to trace the father for you and confirm if he is deceased or not.

It’s worth the effort for peace of mind.

Good luck and please keep us informed of your progress.

Edited August 15, 200916 yr by sassienie

Being a professional genealogist I know that in the UK details of the father has to be quoted on a birth certificate including if any parent is deceased.

My sincere apologies for being extremely dumb here but how could it be the case of the mother being deceased? Father dying before the birth of the child. Sure. But mother?

a mother could die while giving birth as it was the case with my maternal Grandmother

Yeah that's the only situation I could think of.

Having followed Maizefarmer on TV for several years I would be greatly surprised and disappointed if he were charging for assistance he offers. He has enough time consuming earners related to farming going, that I doubt he is looking for income in this way. Some people who have the means/connections do offer and provide assistance when they see a need. It seems he has helped people on TV in the past, to work out some touchy predicaments. Thai lawyers may charge a small fee for the info (define small) or they see a farang atm when you tell them the story. I hope the op will let us know the outcome of his search what ever route he takes.

My wife (Thai) and I married (and happy) for 7 years now.

We have 1 son and a daughter that is not mine. She is 10 years old now and calls me "Dad".

When I met my wife I was been told that the father of the child was killed in a car accident 2-3 months before she was born and that they're hasn’t been married.

I crossed through her birth certificate that other day and noticed that the father's name and I.D number are on it.

Can it be? Doesn’t it should say that he passed away?

Or maybe the whole story is not true...

I will add that I'm not looking for to confront my wife about this (after all, the child believe the same story over the years and I don't wish to cause her any sorrow.

The reason I'm asking is that I'm thinking to legally become her father and adopt her and wondering if it will cause any problems if the father is still alive somewhere.

Thanks for any help.

Firstly, please beware of those who offer to obtain information for you. These are only people who know where to ask and looking for an earner.

Being a professional genealogist I know that in the UK details of the father has to be quoted on a birth certificate including if any parent is deceased. But in Thailand, not sure.

What you do is, visit an amphur office and enquire in there. You will find them very helpful and most speak reasonable English. Perhaps they may give you details of the father.

Failing this, the ID number of the father is easily traceable. Visit any Thai lawyer who will have access to public records, and for a small fee is able to trace the father for you and confirm if he is deceased or not.

It’s worth the effort for peace of mind.

Good luck and please keep us informed of your progress.

pofesional genealogist

What will people think of next?

I suppose it's possible that the father's name and ID could be put on the birth certificate even though he's dead but I would have thought they would possibly have recorded that he is deceased at the time?

Try broaching the subject with your wife in terms of thinking about adopting the daughter legally and asking if she can get the death certificate of the father and see what the reactionis.

I have a close friend (who lives near Udon Thani) who had the same misfortune as the OP's wife. Her husband was killed while she was pregnant about 5 years ago (also by motor vehicle accident). I asked her if on the birth certificate there is any mention that the father was already deceased. She said "no" it only has his name and I.D.

I suppose it's possible that the father's name and ID could be put on the birth certificate even though he's dead but I would have thought they would possibly have recorded that he is deceased at the time?

Try broaching the subject with your wife in terms of thinking about adopting the daughter legally and asking if she can get the death certificate of the father and see what the reactionis.

Yeah.

First, Thank you for your reply. all of you.

Going to the ampohe as sassienie said and enquire there is not possible. My wife family is well known around and so am I as the only farang that actually live there. Asking questions will immidiatly will become the hot story of more than one village which will draw all the arrows in my direction.

Talking with the wife is also not a good way as i'm sure that she will choose to stick with the story other than go out with the truth, if there even is a truth that hasn't been told. and as I said, I'm not looking to confront with her.

I'm only asking for having that peace of mind that I know what really happened.

I guess I just go to a lawyer or something. Thanks again for everyone and I will update you with any new progress.

Being a professional genealogist I know that in the UK details of the father has to be quoted on a birth certificate including if any parent is deceased.

My sincere apologies for being extremely dumb here but how could it be the case of the mother being deceased? Father dying before the birth of the child. Sure. But mother?

You`re right.

Must be the heat.

Oh the shame, the shame.

As slapout said - there is no charge. If I have the contacts/sources - and if it sounds genuine and I can help, why not.

A few guys wrote me asking, just who am I, where do I get this and that info from (referance to other "problems" I have helped other TV members with over the years I suppose) - well, I'm a complete nobody: I live on a farm in the middle of nowhere (in Loei province), with my wife. We have 2 kids and around 350 - 400 cows, a couple tractors, a mean forage harvester (that eats careless farmers for breakfast, lunch and dinner - old TV hands will know what that means) ........ and thats pretty much all there is to know ...... oh, and I meet interesting people from time to time through my father-in-law, who's a jolly good chap and career civil servant with a rather unusual and interesting Bkk deskjob in an office with no windows and lots of double locked doors.

Come on MF, is he working at Bang Khwang, Klong Prem or the police HQ?

BTW,do you think the price of cows or buffaloes will rise in the near future?

Some people on TV would shoot the tax man when/if he delivered their refund check. I do not know a lot of people on TV personally and even may disagree with some/many of them on certain things, but I will give credit where credit is due and will think good thoughts about a individual until I am given reason to think otherwise. Some people/expats who have lived in Thailand for some time do meet and interact with locals who can/do help with questions/problems, real or perceived because they are good/caring people. We all probably need to reminded that the % of touts/con men throughout the world, including Thailand, are far out numbered by the good Samaritans.

Come on MF, is he working at Bang Khwang, Klong Prem or the police HQ?

BTW,do you think the price of cows or buffaloes will rise in the near future?

Your'e trying to bate me ..... are you?

Wrong, wrong and wrong again - he has noting to do with the prison service or the police - tell you what, why don't you hold your horses a few days: the OP has my permission to comment in due course - and thats all you or anyone else need know, okay.

As for the price of cattle - nope, it tends to drop towards the end of the wet season as farmers start offloading head they can't support during the dry season. As for buffalo - haven't got a clue - know little about them.

Edited August 16, 200916 yr by Maizefarmer

I take my hat off to you maize farmer.

Not many expats in my years in LOS offer help let alone for ‘free’ sadly sarcasm seems to be the order of the day.

Most of it seems to come from people that don't live here and have very limited knowledge of Thailand.

Come on MF, is he working at Bang Khwang, Klong Prem or the police HQ?

BTW,do you think the price of cows or buffaloes will rise in the near future?

Your'e trying to bate me ..... are you?

Wrong, wrong and wrong again - he has noting to do with the prison service or the police - tell you what, why don't you hold your horses a few days: the OP has my permission to comment in due course - and thats all you or anyone else need know, okay.

As for the price of cattle - nope, it tends to drop towards the end of the wet season as farmers start offloading head they can't support during the dry season. As for buffalo - haven't got a clue - know little about them.

Not baiting MF, it's just your reference to lots of double locked doors piqued my interest.

Maize Farmer is the real deal.

You've already said your not about to confront your wife about this

It's possible the 'accident' story is her way of handling the situation, perhaps a situation / past history that she'd rather forget.

Let's be honest, many people 'manufacture' stories because it's their way of handling the situation and often nobody is hurt and it's all best left alone.

You've already said your not about to confront your wife about this

It's possible the 'accident' story is her way of handling the situation, perhaps a situation / past history that she'd rather forget.

Let's be honest, many people 'manufacture' stories because it's their way of handling the situation and often nobody is hurt and it's all best left alone.

Well, as I said earlier. I'm looking for the answer so I can know if adoption is possible. Whether I decide to open up the subject with her for that or not is a different story.

Guess I'll just have to wait a few more days for the answer and will see what's next.

Maize Farmer is the real deal.

I've asked MF to check that info for me and for what it worth MF came through with the info - and should supply addtional info that will confirm the accuracy of his findings.

There are still good people out there.