I think the issue isn't that it is a parody but rather what it is a parody of. Parodies are exaggerated accounts of something actual, taken to a ridiculous extreme. So the implication is that Western women in Thailand, while obviously not really flinging themselves out of balconies, are unhappy/troubled about the preference of (many/most) of the Western men here for Thai women, and also feel unattractive in comparison to Thai women.

Now, I have learned from this forum that there are a lot of western men who apparently would expect this to be the case, but AFAIK, it simply isn't. At least not any western woman here that I have ever met.

Hi Sheryl and everyone else in the Ladies Forum:

I can only speak for myself, but there were a number of issues the article exaggerated that I experienced living here.

1. I felt huge. When your size in Thailand is a tight fitting XXL and the Thai people either say your fat or ask you if you're pregnant due to the natural little mound in the lower belly that most of us non-Asian women have - that gets to me eventually. In my home country (the USA) there is an obesity problem that is out of control - THAT's fat! I'm a normal, healthy weight for my height, but to Thais, I am fat. I don't appreciate the comments, but I learned to live with it.

2. Sex and intimacy often get overlapped. While I don't want to get too personal about myself on this forum I should simply say that for women in general, companionship and closeness are intertwined with sex - most of us cannot separate and disconnect the sexual act and many women who do make that disconnection sometimes feel more empty afterward. Or for women don't have casual sex, we are starving for intimacy, companionship, company, somebody to snuggle up next to. It was not easy for me being single in Thailand for a number of YEARS

3. I've sincerely felt dismissed by the farang males in Thailand, as the parody article alluded to. I've been outright ignored (bursted their fantasy bubble with my presence I guess) or outright glared at. This is stereotypical of the males (notice I do not call them men), but it is not a falsehood, plenty of past discussions on that.

4. In all, you are what you focus on. And good for the fictional Canadian character Martha Herkimer for maintaining her positive self image!

Come to the South Amyji. Thai women are all shapes and sizes where I live

Southerners tend to be larger, the men are bigger and so are the women. I know lots of Thai women who weigh more than I do, are definitely fatter than me, and quite a few who are even taller than me.

As for being ignored by western men, I don't know, maybe its a city thing? Where I live most of my friends are western guys and certainly don't ignore me. Happened to me once in the Tesco Express, was nice to some old European guy and he glared at me like I was a serial killer. I thought, "good luck dude, this is a small place and you get along better if you are friendly. Which, has stood me in good stead everywhere I go tbh.

Hi Sheryl and everyone else in the Ladies Forum:

I can only speak for myself, but there were a number of issues the article exaggerated that I experienced living here.

1. I felt huge. When your size in Thailand is a tight fitting XXL and the Thai people either say your fat or ask you if you're pregnant due to the natural little mound in the lower belly that most of us non-Asian women have - that gets to me eventually. In my home country (the USA) there is an obesity problem that is out of control - THAT's fat! I'm a normal, healthy weight for my height, but to Thais, I am fat. I don't appreciate the comments, but I learned to live with it.

2. Sex and intimacy often get overlapped. While I don't want to get too personal about myself on this forum I should simply say that for women in general, companionship and closeness are intertwined with sex - most of us cannot separate and disconnect the sexual act and many women who do make that disconnection sometimes feel more empty afterward. Or for women don't have casual sex, we are starving for intimacy, companionship, company, somebody to snuggle up next to. It was not easy for me being single in Thailand for a number of YEARS

3. I've sincerely felt dismissed by the farang males in Thailand, as the parody article alluded to. I've been outright ignored (bursted their fantasy bubble with my presence I guess) or outright glared at. This is stereotypical of the males (notice I do not call them men), but it is not a falsehood, plenty of past discussions on that.

4. In all, you are what you focus on. And good for the fictional Canadian character Martha Herkimer for maintaining her positive self image!

Gotta say, my wife has mentioned all of these things at some point, but now goes with the flow. Single western girls here can feel like they are 'off the radar', especially if they aren't attracted to Asian men.

My wife and one of her friends were stuck in traffic along Sukhumvit a few weeks back, when a western man crossed the road in front of them and actually smiled at them. My wife and her mate couldn't beleive that it actually happened given that it rarely happens to them, so rare that it was a topic of conversation when I got home.

So the not-the-nation article is a pisstake on what one segment of the farang community feel when they live here....so what?

The ignore or even be hostile thing from Western males here I have had plenty of, I think we all have. It just does not bother me, I figure it's their problem. May also help that I really like my privacy and am a New Yorker by origin so ignoring strangers and being ignored by them feels comfortable to me!

As to Western women not being on their "radar" romance wise, this is indeed true of many of the Western males here, so much so that whenever a male TV memebr posts about relationship issues and I reply, I do so assuming that "must be Thai" is one of his criteria. Of course there are a host of reasons for this, some of it pragmatic (visa..easier to live here with a thai spuse or gf ..etc) but also for sure, a high proportion of Western males here have a chip on their shoulder towards Western woman or an obsession with Asian women or both. This too does not bother me. Can't say that I have ever seen a male of this type whom I would have remotely considered much of a loss.

But I am a good bit older and quite happy being single, Amyji, and can understand that at your age dating/romance are likely pretty important and that you might find it lonely here. Frankly, best chance iin that departament is going to be with Thai men. You are young enough that plenty of still single ones in your age group. If you don't speak Thai well I suggest you learn it, and if you don't have a lot of Thai friends, acquire them. Or else maybe think of moving elswhere....

I am very content living here but I would agree that it is not a place conducive to a Western woman's finding a Western mate. Which is not to say that could not happen, but if it's a priority this isn't a very strategic locale.

Amyji married Golf, a Thai man whom she met through this forum, I believe, a few years ago

I don't know about the hostile thing, I really have to be frank here and say that the only time I have ever encountered overt hostility was the rude old man at the Tesco express. I have to wonder if its something to do with city life? I read alot of members posts here talking about how they wouldn't talk to another farang so perhaps its got more to do with that then being female? I just don't know, I haven't encountered it. To be sure, the day I do, I will post all about it here

Interesting article and thread.

I'm with sbk, this kind of humor doesn't really make me laugh, no matter who's the target. If there were a parody of a farang man in Thailand (and I'm sure there are plenty out there), I'd feel a bit defensive towards all the farang men I know, especially my husband. But that's just me--not really cynical or sarcastic by nature. If some people enjoy it without taking it seriously, well good on them.

Some thoughts:

Can't remember a time that I felt farang men treated me oddly. I've mostly worked as a professional, so most of my interactions would be with colleagues and clients, and then friends, and friends of my husband's.

Only strange comments were probably by some friends of friends who were visiting from Japan for a wedding, along the lines of "it must be hard to be a farang woman living in Thailand." Think they were just trying to wind me up for their own enjoyment--might be the objective of this article? Of course for those of us living here, nothing could be further from the truth. Most farang women I know are happy living here. I've known more than a few who've returned after going somewhere else for awhile.

Our first trips to other Asian cities from Bkk resulted in me asking: Where are all the good-looking people? I realized then that I think Thais are overall pretty good looking--men and women. At least the people I see regularly in Bkk. But I've never felt bad about myself because of that. And I still think my husband is gorgeous although he is not Thai.

Never felt that oversized here, but then I'd lived in places with large populations of Asian descent (ex: HI & SF, CA) before, and am lean and athletic.

One change I made: stopped lifting weights for upper body when I realized oversized biceps, shoulders, back muscles seemed a bit freakish here. Started dancing more instead and over time have grown to prefer the long lean muscles associated with dancing versus lifting weights.

People smile in my direction all the time. That's Thai and farang, men, women, and kids. Not sure why, but maybe that's I tend to smile a lot (common in small town mid-west USA where I grew up). In fact, I fell in love with Thailand on my first day here when my face hurt so much from smiling (fell in love with Thai food in Hawaii before that).

For what that's worth...Misty

(Background: Farang woman, lived and worked professionally in Thailand for many years, married to same farang man for many more years.)

Edited October 22, 200916 yr by Misty

And voila!!!

The article most definitely reads like a "troll" article, where the male author is sarcastically repeating all the male-made stereotypes about Western women in Thailand, using a woman's pseudonym.

The article most definitely reads like a "troll" article, where the male author is sarcastically repeating all the male-made stereotypes about Western women in Thailand, using a woman's pseudonym.

This also seemed obvious to me. I think a number of people tripped over the subtle irony in their rush to be offended, though, heh. Funny article, too. Goes hand in hand with the much more numerous articles on NTN satirizing the male farang population for their stereotypes.

I'm certainly not going to bother going into how easy it is for farang women to find men here!

Probably the same reason that farang men have no difficulty in finding comely Thai ladies.

It was VERY obvious the article was a wind-up 'cos it was so ludicrous but even so, I've no doubt the vast majority of farang men here will try to see it as a serious article.

I have no doubt that the vast majority of farang ladies will try to see it as a serious article.

Hi Bagwan, just so you know, its frowned upon to make comments inside a quote, in the future, please make your comments separate from the quote box, thanks.

I'm certainly not going to bother going into how easy it is for farang women to find men here!

Probably the same reason that farang men have no difficulty in finding comely Thai ladies.

It was VERY obvious the article was a wind-up 'cos it was so ludicrous but even so, I've no doubt the vast majority of farang men here will try to see it as a serious article.

I have no doubt that the vast majority of farang ladies will try to see it as a serious article.

Reading the thread again, made me think (headache coming!).

I've met quite a few nice farang men (sorry Bagwan - it would never cross my mind to look for a bar man! ), but I realised they have nearly all been here for many years and are now very wary - hence their receptive attitude to meeting a farang woman with whom they can talk and laugh about the absurdities of day to day life!

Thinking about it though, I realised that most farang men here do blank me! Just hadn't cared so didn't notice!

Now I've noticed I find it funny!

Obviously Thailand is not the obvious place for a Western woman to come to look for a man , most of the Western men here come looking for a Thai woman for the caricatured reasons!

Reading the thread again, made me think (headache coming!).

I've met quite a few nice farang men (sorry Bagwan - it would never cross my mind to look for a bar man! ), but I realised they have nearly all been here for many years and are now very wary - hence their receptive attitude to meeting a farang woman with whom they can talk and laugh about the absurdities of day to day life!

Thinking about it though, I realised that most farang men here do blank me! Just hadn't cared so didn't notice!

Now I've noticed I find it funny!

I have to say that the reason I don't have many female foreign friends here is mainly:

1) A lot do have chips on their shoulders - fortunately not the majority - and I just can't be bothered with dealing with the negativity

2) Many of the good foreign female friends I've had here move on for various reasons. Not unlike many good male foreign friends. Although I do think life is tougher here for foreign women than men; so

3) Fewer women come here, and seem to stay less time compared to men.

4) I'm pretty settled here now, with a good range of friends, so just don't make the same efforts to meet new people, male or female, which sort of compounds 1)-3) particularly if you're no longer trying. This is probably the main factor these days.

I had a conversation at our daughters school the other day with her teacher. I mentioned I was very happy to have her teaching our daughter as I think she's a great role model as a western female. She also commented that generally professional women often don't stay a long time as life is less easy for women here. I'd like our daughters to have good western female as well as good Asian female role models, as there are cultural differences from which I'd like them to draw on both.

Obviously Thailand is not the obvious place for a Western woman to come to look for a man , most of the Western men here come looking for a Thai woman for the caricatured reasons!

Haha! That last phrase ironically fits exactly with the opening piece in this thread, and is something you'd expect to see in Not the Nation.

Have to say, for anyone who honestly believes that they need to change their social circles. Most long term friends I have here came to Thailand professionally for work, and the girfriends/wives simply happened naturally after. Sure I also have a few good friends who came to travel or to retire, but even then I'd say the majority didn't do so simply because of the women...

think alot of how one views expats in Thailand depends on where one lives in Thailand. The most jaded people seem to live in Phuket, Pattaya and Samui.

Contrary to F1's experiences, very few of the farang male friends I have on Koh Phangan came here looking for women. either caricature reason or not.

..or jaded before they arrived too.

Ive seen young guys around who treat me just the same as they would in the west. With a smile and a friendly attitude. Attractive regular guys. Just the other day I was looking a bit lost as i stopped by the road on my scooter. A couple of nice looking guys of a similar age to me gave me a big smile and asked if im ok. Told them no worries and laughed. Got a thumbs up and a wink. Not for a minute do i think they were "into me", they were just being sociable and friendly in a male to female way. The type of guys who likely have no big chip on their shoulders regarding western women. Who may be into Thai girls or who may not be, but doesnt stop them being open and "normal" to western women.

Another time i met a guy a few years older than me. Talked a lot to(at) me when i was sitting in a cafe. The guy was overweight and liked to complain. Bitter about his divorce in the UK, he openly told me how when he first came he was anti-western women and was pretty negative towards them. But now, after marrying a Thai girl who worked in a bar and got pregnant, said he misses the western girls way (as he said his wife doesnt do anything and in bed just lies there. Like i really needed to know that... ) . May have been a come-on, no idea. But certainly wasnt interested. Hes a guy who is jaded, period. Thai women were his ideal until he met one Thai woman who broke his ideal, then he goes back to appreciating western women. A sadly blinkered view.

Young or old, i believe the men who have positive healthy attitudes about western women whilst in the west (and any problems they may have had with them), will have positive healthy attitudes towards western women here (even if attracted to Thai women).

Edit: oh and sure, that goes for women too.

But im kinda rambling here..so ill move on.

Edited November 6, 200916 yr by eek

Amy has been a member of thaivisa since 2003 so hardly think she is a troll.

OK - not a troll - but how on earth can she say "it hits a little close to home"?? I genuinely cannot see how it 'hits home' at all!

Hi F1fanatic

I wanted to mention two things before I answer your question. I am NOT the author of the article. And Boo is correct, I am not a troll. (thanks for that, Boo!)

I chose to share the link in the Ladies Forum because I have felt and experienced some of the things to a lesser degree that the article mentions. Plus the members of the women only forum where I found the article responded with light-hearted humor - many of them mentioning how they had reacted to, like I have, with similar feelings and situations that the article had mentioned.

Because that was a women's only forum and this is the ThaiVisa Ladies forum, I thought the article - clearly stated in the headline as a parody - would be appreciated by the women on this forum. Guess I was mistaken so I apologize. I will not say I'm sorry though for some foreign women do have a bit more of a diffucult time here than others.

I hope the the Ladies Forum will continue to be a safe haven where we can support one another without fear of condemnation. I just don't want to shy away from issues that can be said to be stereotypical, because I have felt, acutely, some of these things and would like support and solidarity. A

Eek, I did like your breakdown analysis of it. Those were my thoughts on the parody article, more or less, but there were a couple of difficult years for me because I had been a bit lonely, although far from the point of doing anything reckless. Perhaps stuff like this I simply won't share anymore...

Excellent. Well, not until you learn the true meaning of the word 'parody' over spiteful misinformed stereotyping anyways

think alot of how one views expats in Thailand depends on where one lives in Thailand. The most jaded people seem to live in Phuket, Pattaya and Samui.

Contrary to F1's experiences, very few of the farang male friends I have on Koh Phangan came here looking for women. either caricature reason or not.

You're right of course SBK.

Unfortunately living on Phuket, I frequently forget that many men came here (as Fletchsmile says) for professional reasons.

Phuket tends to make one somewhat jaded as the stereotypes are so common.

Funnily enough though, I haven't met any women that are similar to the women parodied in the article (which is far closer to spiteful, misinformed stereotyping than parody IMO ).

Perhaps women in Phuket are different?

Amyji I loved it, then I checked out all the other articles on the website and loved them too, even the adds and polls. I like satire.

I have read 'real' news articles here I thought were stire that weren't, which made it all the more rewarding to discover a nicely written Thai satire site - thanks!

I definitely feel the big white elephant - usually taller than everyone with red hair, white skin and freckles. Have finally got used to going shopping and is now good when they say 'is ok, we have your size, extra extra extra large!!' with a big smile as they think it will make you happy Similarly when they give you a sad look and just shake their heads as they look at your 'gigantic' farang feet/shoulders/other bits... and I am a size 10 in Aus!

Thanks for letting me know about the website!