crazyswede Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 Education education .. contraceptive pills are 20bhat a month in Los .. even i know that and im male and 45 yo.! 555 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sassienie Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 (edited) Teen pregnancies are a major problem in England Pleased to know that seeing as how the discussion is about Thailand. Quite right. The man should be horse whipped. All these teen pregnancies and teen sex. Where is this taking place? I feel that I’m missing out on something here. Feel a bit upset tonight, one of my favourite English actors died, Edward Woodward. Opps, sorry, not Thailand related. Oh crap, the edit buttons expired. Too late you`re stuck with it. Edited November 16, 2009 by sassienie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dpolenz Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 Teen pregnancies are a major problem in England Pleased to know that seeing as how the discussion is about Thailand. Quite right. The man should be horse whipped. All these teen pregnancies and teen sex. Where is this taking place? I feel that I'm missing out on something here. Feel a bit upset tonight, one of my favourite English actors died, Edward Woodward. Opps, sorry, not Thailand related. Oh crap, the edit buttons expired. Too late you`re stuck with it. Horse whipped is being to kind to me,i should be hanged and burned for mentioning another country other then Thailand.Only a slow and painfull death is what i deserve Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dynabob Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 Teen pregnancies are a major problem in England Pleased to know that seeing as how the discussion is about Thailand. Quite right. The man should be horse whipped. All these teen pregnancies and teen sex. Where is this taking place? I feel that I’m missing out on something here. Feel a bit upset tonight, one of my favourite English actors died, Edward Woodward. Opps, sorry, not Thailand related. Oh crap, the edit buttons expired. Too late you`re stuck with it. AS far as i know horse whipping is not assocated to thailand,slow death for you also.Where i come from when a teenager get's pregnant her mate's refer to her as "being in the club"teenage boy's refer to her as "being blocked" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bagwan Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 Teen pregnancies are a major problem in England Pleased to know that seeing as how the discussion is about Thailand. Quite right. The man should be horse whipped. All these teen pregnancies and teen sex. Where is this taking place? I feel that I'm missing out on something here. Feel a bit upset tonight, one of my favourite English actors died, Edward Woodward. Opps, sorry, not Thailand related. Oh crap, the edit buttons expired. Too late you`re stuck with it. Horse whipped is being to kind to me,i should be hanged and burned for mentioning another country other then Thailand.Only a slow and painfull death is what i deserve Join Liverpool football supporters club then. That ought to do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tw25rw Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 It's a perfectly natural consequence of being human. The parents should just enjoy being grandparents, support the girl and kid and stop caring what the neighbours think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bagwan Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 In my years as social worker for youngsters I have never met a 16 year old girl who became pregnant to get social benefits. I have heard at least six young UK misses telling her friends that they were thinking of having a baby. I asked one who would take care of the infant and the flippant reply was "My Mum will." These girls seem to think that a baby is a toy rather than a tiny human being that requires a great deal of one's attention. I do wonder if young person ever tell the truth to probation officers and social workers. My guess is that a good proportion would say what authority wanted to hear. My wife and I sat down with our daughter when she reached the age of 15 and explained the process of procreation including the emotional bit. When she had her first serious boyfriend she was told by us that we realised that probably sex would rear its ugly head and that she would have to deal with it. We told her that there was no way that we could stop her dipping her toes in the water but we would prefer if she would wait until she was more mature. We underlined that if she got pregnant she would be on her own. Neither my wife nor I would change nappies or wash them. We would not be getting up during the night to feed or otherwise attend to a bawling infant. We would not baby sit if she wanted a night out. We would not help out financially. Some ten years later she thanked us for drawing the lines for her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dieter1 Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 (edited) The words of this young mother are are touching me. "...I was determined not to destroy my own child " So true ! That is, what an abortion means ! And she is right: Abortion means for many women, that they will later regret it deeply. I had a girlfriend (I was already 43, she was 34) and she decided to make an abortion. I didnt want that but in my country, they are telling women, that it is ok and that it is her decision and they need not to ask the man. I even would have raise the child up alone ! No chance ! If they do not want the child, they don´t even want to give the baby to you! It drove me nearly crazy. It helps to nearly never been able to trust a woman anymore. I told my daughter, if she will be pregnant, even in young age, I will help her to take care for the baby as much as I can ! A grand-child is nearly like you own child ! It seems, people today did forget this fact ! The effect of Contraceptive pills are mostly like an early abortion ! Killing the early embryo. (do a search in internet if you do not believe ) Being pregnant in the age of 15, 16 is quite normal for human beings. Our forefathers did marry in very young age. It was quite normal to marry as soon you were able to have a baby. So maybe our kind of living today are kind of not normal anymore. We should help these young women as much as we can and help them. Preventing a lot of suffering this way ! This does not mean to encourage them to get pregnant ! Edited November 16, 2009 by dieter1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimjim Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 Sex education and strongly encouraging about the use of condoms is key here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brahmburgers Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 I admire the 19 yr old boy for taking on responsibility, but no matter how mature, he's just too young to be expected to be a decent father. The girl is obviously irresponsible to get pregnant so often in a few years span. She's heard of condoms, and should insist the guys she's bedding with use them. She says 'parents' are the biggest factor in lessening teen and unwanted pregnancies. Parents are only part of the equation. Being grossly irresponsible, guided by passion/hormones, alcohol, and lack of education are all at least as important in the equation. Boys will always be boys, and go around trying to stick their banana in to as many slippery hollows as possible. However, that is no excuse for shirking responsibilities (am talking about the 97% who are not like the 19 yr old dude mentioned in the OP). Thailand should have a law with teeth which mandates money payments from deadbeat dads. As far as I know, there is no such law. I have met hundreds of Thai massage women in the past 23 years, and well over half of them have kids. And none have the dads assisting with taking care of the kids. Not one deadbeat dad is giving one satang for the care of their offspring. That's a microcosm of a big problem worldwide, no less so in Thailand. At the schools I volunteered there are every year some students getting pregnant, especialy the 15 year olds. The problem in my view is that there is no sex education. While there is some attention for AIDS/HIV, there is no attention for birthcontrol. Sex is great, but there are consequences. The kids should be taught that in graphic detail. The wages of not doing so are evident in the millions of stories like the OP, and hundreds of thousands of abortions. .....and kids who grow up with a child-like parent, and are destined to continue the warped pattern. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
animatic Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 (edited) Out forefathers sold their daughters into marriage to make alliances. They didn't care if she died in a too early childbirth, children came easy for most, because the alliance was sealed by the marriage. Maybe those days are best past, and that chapter closed. Just because your body can create an embryo doesn't mean it is prepared to bring it to term either. And just because a person can get pregnant doesn't mean they are prepared to raise the child properly. This isn't a paen to abortion, but to informing young ladies TOTALLY of the risks of too early unprotected sex. We have done that already, and didn't wait for age 15, but at her 1st period. That is the line without fail. After that it is TOO LATE. INCLUDING the 'you can die and kill your baby' part; from venereal diseases, and 'too young an age to deliver properly'. If only all 13 year old girls could see a actual video with sound of child birth... they would certainly think twice. Edited November 17, 2009 by animatic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
animatic Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 Pleased to know that seeing as how the discussion is about Thailand. Quite right. The man should be horse whipped. All these teen pregnancies and teen sex. Where is this taking place? I feel that I'm missing out on something here. Feel a bit upset tonight, one of my favourite English actors died, Edward Woodward. Opps, sorry, not Thailand related. Oh crap, the edit buttons expired. Too late you`re stuck with it. Horse whipped is being to kind to me,i should be hanged and burned for mentioning another country other then Thailand.Only a slow and painfull death is what i deserve Join Liverpool football supporters club then. That ought to do it. Call in Coach Torquemada. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowflake Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 I am a teacher here in Thailand and I have several times asked the Thai teachers what they teach the kids (about sex)... I think that one problem is that they can not talk about it themselves... I think that they would like the students to find out by themselves... Can't see the problem = it is not there... I think that many younger girls get pregnant today because of all the porn that floats around, just grab one of your students mobile phones and look at the clips they have... Sex sells, look at the magz that the girls are reading, cartoon porn, not my taste but they like it... Education is again the way to go. There should be teachers out there who is not afraid to talk about sex, anal penetration or whatever they will throw at you to make you blush or embaressed (they will try)... Once the kids are educated and they understand what can happen they are more likely to ask the boys to wear a condom, BUT, this is Thailand and the boys decide what will happen, never think that the girl can decide... I have seen girls been given to other boys for losing bets... The sad truth here is that most Thais look at girls as a thing, not a human... Boys tell, girls do... easy... I like the suggestion above with a law that requiers the dad to pay/take care of the child... question is, how do you impleement that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
virtualtraveller Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 Serious problem in Thailand the way I see it, how many girls have you met in bars or massage who have kids, father did a runner and the girl is confined to working long hours for poor wages for their young adult lives sending it all back to granny who's raising baby with her old fashioned, ill educated values. What a dysfunctional way to confine yourself and your child to the working class. All because no one in the education or parenting system wants to face up to sex education. In the 7 years I've been here I've seen a marked shift in moral attitudes towards sex, when i arrived there was still this old fashioned shy approach from girls, now they all want to be giks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
animatic Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 (edited) Serious problem in Thailand the way I see it, how many girls have you met in bars or massage who have kids, father did a runner and the girl is confined to working long hours for poor wages for their young adult lives sending it all back to granny who's raising baby with her old fashioned, ill educated values. What a dysfunctional way to confine yourself and your child to the working class. All because no one in the education or parenting system wants to face up to sex education.In the 7 years I've been here I've seen a marked shift in moral attitudes towards sex, when i arrived there was still this old fashioned shy approach from girls, now they all want to be giks. Hear, here! Granted I discount the porn in telephone issue, they tend to just use that as a laugh. The mechanics of sex is not really an unknown for most anyone over 13. The written stories put whole scenes of sex with the romance they crave, into their heads and never show the seamy side. And the soaps don't help a bit. Edited November 17, 2009 by animatic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bagwan Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 Thailand should have a law with teeth which mandates money payments from deadbeat dads. As far as I know, there is no such law. I have met hundreds of Thai massage women in the past 23 years, and well over half of them have kids. And none have the dads assisting with taking care of the kids. Not one deadbeat dad is giving one satang for the care of their offspring. That's a microcosm of a big problem worldwide, no less so in Thailand. I have no problem with your post but I am wondering if there isn't a cultural element in this. Some African tribes, Zulus certainly, whose men will not marry a lady unless she has proved herself to be fertile. Thus there are many what we might describe as illegitimate children running around. They are however very much part of the family and the babies are considered fortunate in having many fathers i.e.their uncles. Given the way children are swapped around in Thai society there would seem to be a parallel. My step daughter was given her marching orders and to leave the baby behind when her 'husband' found another, younger woman. It seems that he had the law on his side. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loz Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 Certainly in the UK there are documented cases of familys getting 35k a year in benefits because single mum can't work so must stay home and raise kids at the tax payers expense. Agree or not, this is fact. I recall the documentary and newspaper headings before I left England in 2006. It was sad then but understandable. The question at the time was more about why don't these people get jobs. But the fact remains, WHy get a job if having 3 kids and no hubby pays 35k a year which affords them a 3 bedroom house and all the trash TV they can watch while dining on the finest brands of Junk food. Google it if you are in any doubt. As for young girls getting knocked up here. Seems likley to be more out of ignorance and social norms making underages sex common place in certain parts of the native society. They don't know the consequences until its too late, and then... Well, we get to read about it here... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Latindancer Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 The link is to the benifits they can receive as a single mother , cheap housing(subsidised by the government) , living allowance , special other allowances once a year for clothing and xmas , free dental etc . You really think these girls think: "I want a house, clothing allowence and live of social security; let's have a baby"? Yes....it's a well-known fact that they did so in Australia years ago, after the government introduced pensions for single mothers. And I've heard it's true in other countries. Perhaps you don't realize what a trap poverty can be ? Or the lengths people will go to to get a more comfortable life ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mario2008 Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 I understand all too well what a trap poverty can be. But for a 16 year old it is no escape from poverty to get a child. They are not getting their own house, they live with their parent. It is ignorance that gets them pregnant. In the US you will see a high percentage of teenage mothers, whose parents oppose sex-education on moral/religious grounds. That same problem is happening in Thailand, where parents are ignoring the fact that youths have sex. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geriatrickid Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 One of the more depressing threads. It's not so much knowing that the children of teen mothers are more likely to suffer abuse, neglect and economic deprivation, particularly when there is no extended family to step in and pick up the pieces, rather it is the attitude of those that grab on to simplistic explanations of how these pregnancies occur. There may be some Thais that see having a child as a ticket to security, emotional security - not financial security, but they soon realize that having a child at 16 usually locks one into a life of poverty. Thailand doesn't have the greatest of social nets, so to those claiming that a pregnancy is a money making option, please tell me how the teen mother will receive a financial windfall? Does a stork drop the gold and opportunity from the sky? Perhaps there wouldn't be so many single mothers if boys would learn to be men. Your statement is true. Unfortunately, it assumes someone is there to teach the boy the concept of responsibility. If the father is absent or a bounder, who will teach the boy? Children that have children, beget more children having children. As others have stated, the only solution is education, access to birth control and more education. A few months ago, there were a series of study publications showing the increase in STIs and particularly HIV in the adolescent population. Kids, have their own concept of risk and risk avoidance. It may surprise some, but they just do not consider the risk of pregnancy or disease when copulating. Hence, the need for an emphasis upon education. It's the only strategy that has worked in Thailand. Dr. Condom saved a nation over a decade ago and yet all that he demonstrated and taught has been forgotten by both sides of the political divide in Thailand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hammered Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 I come from a poor background back home and remember quite a few girls dropping out of school from 14-15 to have babies. It seems to happen more with the disadvantaged and those lacking education. It always has and likely always will. Funnily enough when I went to college I mixed a lot more with the middle classes who knew a lot more about contraception and were more likely to use it, as were men, and found that the few friends who got pregnant opted totally for abortion (even managed to go through that twice myself in my entire life). Funnily enough my observations in Thailand have been pretty much the same. It seems a bit of a class issue to me. Anyone who thinks women get pregnant to claim benefits imho is silly, a comlete misogynist, an extreme right wing lunatic, Rupert Murdoch or maybe some combination. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dumball Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 Thank you hammered for those fantastic titles , never thought I would be that well thought of on this forum , full of the worlds most educated and informed people whom have been assembled in such a constricted area . In North American it has been happening for many years , should you have had a better spot to park your head than where you obviously do , you may have read some of the reports on what governments have done to try and curb this type of behaviour . Just because you and people of your genre are not aware of such goings on , gives you no excuse or reason to denegrate those with a wider span of knowledge in certain areas , why do you people not just go on with your sheltered lives , keep wearing the rose tinted spectacles and viewing the world through a tube . It is possible that the world you are living in is as perfect as you tend to believe and try to convince others it is really so , but outside of your restricted view points , there is actualy a whole different world that can be viewed . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cdnvic Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 Ok, let's try to stay on subject and keep the personal jabs to ourselves. Disagreeing with each other is fine, just do it respectfully. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sassienie Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 It's a perfectly natural consequence of being human. The parents should just enjoy being grandparents, support the girl and kid and stop caring what the neighbours think. This has nothing to do with what anyone thinks, as someone else doesn`t get stuck with the problem. It`s the parents who usually end up lumbered looking after the brat while the daughter has to work in order to support herself and the child. Normally people who have spent most of their younger years bringing up their own kids, than having to repeat the process all over again, when they should be able to relax and enjoy their lives. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slipperx Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 The link is to the benifits they can receive as a single mother , cheap housing(subsidised by the government) , living allowance , special other allowances once a year for clothing and xmas , free dental etc . You really think these girls think: "I want a house, clothing allowence and live of social security; let's have a baby"? Yes that is exactly the case in the UK with a segment of society - it is a real problem but maybe somewhat peculiar to the UK with its warped benefits system. I know a few people whose livelihood is made by supplying rental accommodation to these darlings with the rent paid promptly by the DHSS. The level of welfare abuse is astronomic and there are plenty of girls who think along those lines. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dumball Posted November 17, 2009 Share Posted November 17, 2009 So there we go folks , some-one else who knows a little more than the "They would not do a thing like that " , it is a fact of life for a lot of females . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brahmburgers Posted November 18, 2009 Share Posted November 18, 2009 Someone asked on this thread, "how can society compel a deadbeat dad to pay to support his offspring?" Most girls who get pregnant, know who inseminated them. Or, if it was a group sex or a gang rape, they probably have a good idea of the culprits. Along with that, there's DNA testing for accuracy. Unfortunately, most single moms, would err on the side of 'forgiving' and thereby enabling the deadbeat dad to avoid responsibility. If a deadbeat dad can't pay at least Bt.100/day to his ex-, then he gets sent to a "Responsibility Center". He makes at least minimum wage: Bt.170/day, half of that sent by hiring administration directly to the single mom for partial support of the child or children. What types of work? laundry services, tanning leather, making pallets/crates, recycling, digging ditches, picking up litter after outdoor concerts, making sidewalks/fixing roads/railroads and infrastructure. Steam cleaning the black mildew that grows on the sides of every building in Thailand, cleaning streets and sidewalks. Dealing with the tangles of black wires that line every road in Thailand, .......and such. There are ways to get out of the camp, all of which require a firm commitment to paying child support until the child turns 18. No exceptions if the mother re-marries of has a decent job. If the deadbeat dad still runs off, send him to a higher security place. All the while, educate, educate, educate the younger crowd, including showing videos of the deadbeat dads working their tails off at the Responsibility Centers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaiWai Posted November 18, 2009 Share Posted November 18, 2009 Someone asked on this thread, "how can society compel a deadbeat dad to pay to support his offspring?" Most girls who get pregnant, know who inseminated them. Or, if it was a group sex or a gang rape, they probably have a good idea of the culprits. Along with that, there's DNA testing for accuracy. Unfortunately, most single moms, would err on the side of 'forgiving' and thereby enabling the deadbeat dad to avoid responsibility. If a deadbeat dad can't pay at least Bt.100/day to his ex-, then he gets sent to a "Responsibility Center". He makes at least minimum wage: Bt.170/day, half of that sent by hiring administration directly to the single mom for partial support of the child or children. What types of work? laundry services, tanning leather, making pallets/crates, recycling, digging ditches, picking up litter after outdoor concerts, making sidewalks/fixing roads/railroads and infrastructure. Steam cleaning the black mildew that grows on the sides of every building in Thailand, cleaning streets and sidewalks. Dealing with the tangles of black wires that line every road in Thailand, .......and such. There are ways to get out of the camp, all of which require a firm commitment to paying child support until the child turns 18. No exceptions if the mother re-marries of has a decent job. If the deadbeat dad still runs off, send him to a higher security place. All the while, educate, educate, educate the younger crowd, including showing videos of the deadbeat dads working their tails off at the Responsibility Centers. brahmburgers! For a while I thought you were saying there was really such a system in place ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
medegen Posted November 18, 2009 Share Posted November 18, 2009 Teen Pregnancies in __________ A big problem. Just insert whatever country you like Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mahtin Posted November 18, 2009 Share Posted November 18, 2009 Teen Pregnancies in __________ A big problem. Just insert whatever country you like Saudi Arabia? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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