Doing It The Hard Way...

[473geo]

The two pints is the amount where I am sure I have the resolve to stop, when finished, and leave the bar (99% of the time)...if I have 3 pints the alcohol,<deleted>, attitude cuts in, and, the danger of staying on is high, almost a certainty!!!...... .

Like yourself I can drink soft drinks all night......so I try to tailor my 'drinking'.......if I am popping in, 2 pints then safely home......if I am socialising all night usually soft drinks.......but if I think my resolve is good I may fit in the 2 pints along the way....

I don't know...I guess I see this as a tension release response to the I cannot drink I am an alcoholic situation......I have now proved to myself on many occasions I can do this....so although I can and often do choose to be dry.....I know that one pint is not going to lead to 8......I know 2 pints are not going to lead to 8.............but I also know 3 will almost certainly lead to 8 and having a headache and feeling lethargic all the next day...which of course I do not appreciate or want to occur!!!.........of course in my drinking days no problem, out at lunch the following day, for a reviver and energy boost!!!......but like Seedy mentioned in another thread my life has changed.

So 2 is the magic number......I lapsed once over christmas....compulsory party......had 5 pints but was the second person to leave.....just before they started on the shots!!!!........I do not see that as a real lapse because I am rather proud of the fact I went home 'early'...

But it took some doing, so dry, or 2 pints it is!!!!......

Just trying to give you an alternative view......hope you work something out and all goes well for 2010

Best wishes...stay healthy.

edit: spelling

Edited December 31, 2009 by 473geo

[ThaiPauly]

I wish I could just drink 2 pints

There is a guy across the street from me who drinks one bottle of beer every night at 6pm.

To me that seems completely pointless

[473geo]

I wish I could just drink 2 pints

There is a guy across the street from me who drinks one bottle of beer every night at 6pm.

To me that seems completely pointless

Depends.....if you drink because you really enjoy a beer....the first pint tastes really good....(man have you any idea how good a bottle of hoppy real ale can taste in Thailand.......beautiful)..........the second too......but really.... after that are you drinking to enjoy the taste?

[ThaiPauly]

I wish I could just drink 2 pints

There is a guy across the street from me who drinks one bottle of beer every night at 6pm.

To me that seems completely pointless

Depends.....if you drink because you really enjoy a beer....the first pint tastes really good....(man have you any idea how good a bottle of hoppy real ale can taste in Thailand.......beautiful)..........the second too......but really.... after that are you drinking to enjoy the taste?

I'll let you guess

[473geo]

Tell you what....you just carry on thinking it is pointless.....and he will just carry on enjoying his one beer.......

[473geo]

Another guy in the family goes up in smoke tomorrow.........should burn well.......I once watched him glug half a bottle of lao kao in one.......

would he have lived a longer life if he had drank one bottle of beer a day..........

I'll let you guess.....

[cognos]

..and the winner, in the eighth round.. by knockout is... ALL IN MODERATION!!!! hailing from Phuket, the 28 year old "all in moderation" does nothing to excess, except win, baby, WIN..

.. born of several mothers and fathers of all nationalities.."all in moderation" is a prime example of how to do it right!!

[cognos]

you will stay dry, not high and dry

[StreetCowboy]

That's three weeks yesterday.

The family set off for home in the small hours of the morning - I got a SMS at 4 am to say they had been bumped on to a later flight, and I expect a call later today to say they missed their connection to Bangkok - that's my advert for Qatar Airways done.

I suppose the next three weeks will be a bit more difficult - we'll see how that goes.

I can see why AA stress the need to 'Let go absolutely' of our old ways of thinking etc since most of the things that I do begin or end with a pint with friends (or on my own)...

Maybe I'll start reading books...

SC

[473geo]

I think you are right......try to change your patterns. I believe there is a similarity with smoking in the way that repetitive actions need to be broken, like the cigarette with a coffee, or after a meal. If you call in the same pub on the way home from work/the gym....change your route....might remove the temptation.....reading does help.

[StreetCowboy]

I think you are right......try to change your patterns. I believe there is a similarity with smoking in the way that repetitive actions need to be broken, like the cigarette with a coffee, or after a meal. If you call in the same pub on the way home from work/the gym....change your route....might remove the temptation.....reading does help.

I guess the point is that it is much easier to do something, than to not do something, so the challenge is to find things to do that don't lead to drinking.

One problem I have, being a tight-fisted scotch git, is that I compare the cost of things with the cost of a couple of pints - as if that was ever going to happen. I'd be far better comparing them to a skinful and whatever...

SC

[473geo]

You might try and form alliances/make friends with people who don't drink........

Now the obvious reality here is......you ain't going find them in a pub!!!!!

So you will have to change and start visiting alternative venues.......

You know years ago I used to run 5 - 6 miles in around 28 - 30 minutes..........then go into the pub.....drink for 4 hours until the last bus came to take me back!!!!! pissed!!!!

How crazy is that??

In your youth you can do these things!!!!!

[Canada]

I quit many, many times as well...no problem. But always went back, drank too much, had to quit again. It finally dawned on me to quit, and stay quit cause you'll just have to quit again. Got tired of starting over. 6 years later through 12 step programs, my life is awesome. I never want to start over again. Through learning a better way of life, many difficulties have just "gone away". So, Street Cowboy...keep on quitting, or just stay quit...the choice is yours. Whatever way works for you is up to you. The odds aren't good any way you look at it, but at least AA has stats. A proven way of quitting drinking and living life for millions. Best of luck to you.

[StreetCowboy]

THanks very much for all your ecouragement...

I re-set the clock last night, and didn't make it into work till after lunchtime, being unfit to drive to the office.

I don't really think of it as stopping drinking, as cutting down. I only have a skinful every few weeks, instead of every few nights. THe intention being to get into the habit of not drinking every night, so that I can cut down still further indefinitely...

SC

[473geo]

That to me is one way to do it......break the habitual drinking and you learn an element of control.....

Ok so you had a few last night......now evaluate it....what did it do for you?

But look at this positively, if you can cut out drink for long periods - which you have done - so you know you can - that is a positive

Now all you need to do is learn to control your drinking when you do indulge.......I reckon you can......because if you do not....then the alternative is never to touch alcohol at all.....so make a bigger effort to control your drinking when you do drink ,that to me, should be your next goal......set targets and stick to them do this once then you know you can do it.

Don't forget one lapse does not bring the house down....just knocks a few slates off.........keep working to gain control.

[StreetCowboy]

1 day so far...

We went out after work on Thursday (that's the end of the week for us); My original plan had been to drive to the pub, stick to the coke, take everyone else to the next pub, then dump the car and join them, or maybe go, pick someone else up and come back to join them...

Anyway, after two cokes I persuaded myself to join in, and collect the car in the morning... and thus it was. No great disaster, but nothing achieved, thousands of baht spent. I suppose the highlight of the weekend was a nice forty-minute walk through a part of town I'd never walked before to pick up the car on Friday lunch time.

My target now is to stay dry till the next big rugby weekend in about four weeks' time, when the Six Nations kicks off, and to last till the end of the week without going to the ATM.

Very best of luck to anyone else who is trying to quit or cut down.

SC

Thinking about where I went wrong on Thursday...

I suppose I should have made a commitment to drive somewhere on Thursday night, so that I had to leave early, and then play SMS Hide-and-seek to rejoin the team on their crawl round the bars. Or maybe I should have dropped the car off first, so that I was joining in later...The AA Team will say I should have gone to an AA meeting instead of the pub, which I suppose is a credible alternative, and one that I should think about for the rugby weekend...

[gerryBScot]

Cowboy happy new year to you. I'd suggest a 90 day target with lots of AA meetings. as many as you can do. treat it like life and death, it is in the long term and the long term could be tomorrow, who knows? avoid wet places, don't go to bars or on crawls, find an excuse for not going to the rugby. the general trend for people like us is that it gets worse when we drink again, it doesn't get better. good luck.

[473geo]

Yep the rugby will be fatal.....you are sure to be wanting to drown your sorrows after the Calcutta cup this year!!!!.... .

[dmax]

i find it impossible to stop drinking in los, morning noon and night , here back in uk i havent touched a drop. wonder why that is ?

[StreetCowboy]

i find it impossible to stop drinking in los, morning noon and night , here back in uk i havent touched a drop. wonder why that is ?

Why would you want to stop drinking in Thailand? I assume you are not working there...

When the family was here, I had no trouble staying dry for three weeks, but when I am left to my own devices, I find it very difficult...

Still, the way I see it, every night I stay in watching television or whatever is 1,000 baht in the bank.

SC

For 473Geo: I suppose the worst calcutta cup I ever watched was 2005, co-incident with the Sevens World Cup in Hong Kong. Last game of the day we were up against New Zealand, and they thrashed us. I watched us get thrashed in the Calcutta Cup; and then we drew England in the Sevens Quarter-Finals for a third thrashing. Now that was a reason to drown some sorrows... Although the rest of the competition was great, and its actually quite hard to drink a lot on finals day because the rugby is so exciting. As I recall, Waisele Sereve scored the winning try at the death in the Semi-Final against England...

[gerryBScot]

The problem as an alky is you get pissed if Scotland win, you get pissed if Scotland lose and you get pissed if it's a draw!

[gerryBScot]

Oh and if you are an English alky you get pissed if England win, England lose or it's a draw!

[StreetCowboy]

So after trying to stir the pot late last night on another thread, I thought I'd pop in to my local for a pint and a Chinese Lesson, but I didn't. I looked at the pitiful collection of grubby notes in my wallet, and thought wistfully about saying good bye to one of them, then went to the supermarket to buy tomorrow's lunch instead, and went home sadder, older and wiser. I was a little bit surprised at how hard it was to get to sleep.

I suppose I suffer from weekend jet lag, sleeping late and going to bed late at the weekend, and two days is enough to put your body clock out; then I don't go to bed early enough during the week, and I'm sufficiently tired that I can sleep till late morning the next weekend, and get out of kilter again.

The lady in the supermarket short-changed me, probably by accident, but I never noticed till I got home. It was still cheaper than two pints, though, and I probably feel better for it this morning.

SC

[koheesti]

I suppose drinking too much is not my problem - its a symptom or a consequence of being unable to stop drinking when I am half-pissed or more. And then, unable to stop, I continue...

That's pretty much my problem. I keep drinking, can't stop at just three or four. I've been a heavy drinker more or less for the past 25 years. Fortunately I'm a happy drunk so at least I've got that going for me. I can also stop drinking without feeling any side effects. Although for me stopping drinking is like joining a gym - the intentions are good but it never lasts. What makes me decide to stop? A combination of things; money, health, or boredom. I used to have a good time when I drank. Sometimes I've noticed even though I drank a lot I was still bored. Screw that. I'm not spending all that money to be bored. When I do stop for weeks at a time (usually, a 4-5 days is a stretch) I don't necessarily feel better physically. But my days seem longer because I remember everything and I save a lot of money. Money saved not only from drinking, but from the bad decisions made while drunk, "Good morning,...who are you?". I found that I was more addicted to the extra money than alcohol. But I need to stop for a month or so first before it starts to become noticeable. It was nice. I would go to restaurants and not worry about prices for a change. Last time I was doing well, then after 2 months or so I decided to limit myself to one drink a night in hopes of helping my pool game (bad excuse and it didn't really work). That lasted 1-2 months. Then slowly back to business as usual. So now I am in Day 6 of my latest attempt to stop. So the cycle begins again.

[StreetCowboy]

I suppose drinking too much is not my problem - its a symptom or a consequence of being unable to stop drinking when I am half-pissed or more. And then, unable to stop, I continue...

That's pretty much my problem. I keep drinking, can't stop at just three or four. I've been a heavy drinker more or less for the past 25 years. Fortunately I'm a happy drunk so at least I've got that going for me. I can also stop drinking without feeling any side effects. Although for me stopping drinking is like joining a gym - the intentions are good but it never lasts. What makes me decide to stop? A combination of things; money, health, or boredom. I used to have a good time when I drank. Sometimes I've noticed even though I drank a lot I was still bored. Screw that. I'm not spending all that money to be bored. When I do stop for weeks at a time (usually, a 4-5 days is a stretch) I don't necessarily feel better physically. But my days seem longer because I remember everything and I save a lot of money. Money saved not only from drinking, but from the bad decisions made while drunk, "Good morning,...who are you?". I found that I was more addicted to the extra money than alcohol. But I need to stop for a month or so first before it starts to become noticeable. It was nice. I would go to restaurants and not worry about prices for a change. Last time I was doing well, then after 2 months or so I decided to limit myself to one drink a night in hopes of helping my pool game (bad excuse and it didn't really work). That lasted 1-2 months. Then slowly back to business as usual. So now I am in Day 6 of my latest attempt to stop. So the cycle begins again.

Did I write that? I don't remember it - and the user ID seems strange. I must have a double...

SC

[gerryBScot]

When you are half-pissed it is too late. The key is not having the first drink. If you do not take it you cannot get drunk. This is a very simple truth learned in AA for which I am very grateful. It is as easy and as hard as that.

[StreetCowboy]

When you are half-pissed it is too late. The key is not having the first drink. If you do not take it you cannot get drunk. This is a very simple truth learned in AA for which I am very grateful. It is as easy and as hard as that.

Despite agreeing with you 100%, I am gasping for a pint right now. I'm sat in the office finishing off some work, the power will go off in a little over an hour; it'll take me 30 minutes to drive home, then maybe pop round the corner for a pint and listen to the band in the local pub...

Maybe I'll pack up quickly and go to the gym first - or even instead. Either way, I'll feel better for that, and probably sleep better.

SC

[StreetCowboy]

When you are half-pissed it is too late. The key is not having the first drink. If you do not take it you cannot get drunk. This is a very simple truth learned in AA for which I am very grateful. It is as easy and as hard as that.

Despite agreeing with you 100%, I am gasping for a pint right now. I'm sat in the office finishing off some work, the power will go off in a little over an hour; it'll take me 30 minutes to drive home, then maybe pop round the corner for a pint and listen to the band in the local pub...

Maybe I'll pack up quickly and go to the gym first - or even instead. Either way, I'll feel better for that, and probably sleep better.

I felt rough as dogs all day today, until now I feel a bit of a thirst coming on...

... but not tonight.

SC

So I met my colleague for a quiet pint... I dn't remember the last night club at all, and I mis-placed my ATM card somewhere...

I know the answer, but I can't face asking the question...

SC

[StreetCowboy]

So I met my colleague for a quiet pint... I dn't remember the last night club at all, and I mis-placed my ATM card somewhere...

I know the answer, but I can't face asking the question...

SC

Just to follow up with an entertaining aside, I asked my colleague in the office "Did you pick up my ATM card by any chance last night"

"No"

"Strange. I know I paid with credit card, and that was still there, with bill, but the ATM card must have dropped out my wallet or something - quite possible, since it is falling apart and I am waiting till I get back to BKK to buy another 100 baht wallet..."

So I checked the account on line, nothing amiss, and cancelled the card.

Following day, en route to lunch, my colleague went to get money out his wallet - "What's that doing there?"

Thoughts to self 'why didn't you check when I asked you?'; reviewing my bank statements, I discovered it costs me about 900 baht each time I get a cash advance from the ATM as well, so that wasn't very well planned.

Anyway, I managed last week without a drink with the help of a friend, and the weekend with the help of AA, so next week I am looking for new obstacles to throw in my path, to keep doing it the hard way...

SC

[473geo]

I had a night out Friday.......one Beer, at the Hotel where my friend was staying, while he changed......we were going for meal where you took your own.......he bought a bottle of rum and drank all but an inch and a half of the bottle!!!....I bought 4 cans.....drank 3 and left the other......were there for 4 hours.....I was proud of myself...that is how I try to keep up my strength.......once again went home in good shape......the best bit is, still enjoyed the meal and the company.........that is what I discovered....you don't have to drink too much to have fun.

Not quite as much as the England win today.....a good start......will watch your lot start against France.....

The invitations are coming in now, and I may have to attend another work related function this month end......I must remember to stick to my 2 pints and not get confident I can slip over that, and survive every time!!!!

I wish you well...... not taking over your thread just trying to give you some hope that drinking can be controlled....maybe quitting altogether is the only way for some.....for me I prefer the option of strict control because without that I would have no options!!!!