Thai Wife Happiness & Mo-jo & Jai-lorn-lorn Aka Got A Thai Wife Now What?

[Loz]

two sound investments:

1: Ear plugs

2: Mia noi

People accused of thinking thai women are disposable items possible should not be dissmissed out of hand. Maybe they have seen the way Thailand's acceptance of polygamy up until the last century has enabled men in the OP's situation to "shelve" one and find another to meet the requirements originally sort. Many thai men seem to "take care" of the wife regardless of how she makes them feel (possibly to save face, possibly because it is "the done thing") and carry on a separate existence which the wife either does not know about or tolerates quietly or otherwise...

Hope this helps.

Ps. I fall into the unmarried and not looking category. Feel free to weight my answer accordingly.

[sokal]

Your 70 year old so called "expert" must have steered you in the wrong direction.

[sokal]

So what, dear experts, is his agenda ? Why spend so much time composing such a long post if it is not genuine ? He may have a valid reason for going back home for a visit.

Thaibean, there may well be value in listening to the local experts.....your Thai female friends.

Thanks latindancer sounds like you got a heart. I note that 99% of the reponse here is from little boys that only know about women from smelling their sisters underwear. Yes, I'm posted this from the States, had to come back for my fathers funeral. But I'll be back in two weeks in Nahkon Sawan.

So how about it guys? How about telling me how to live this woman? FYI: Yes, ... house, car, $2M sin-sod, $200k tung-mung, ... you name it I paid, and yes like I said, the parents are jewels.

I'm not looking for help from the 99% here that only know about women from smelling their sisters under-wear, I'm looking for advice here from a real man who has conqured this set of problems. When I was younger and wiser there is no way in hel_l I would have married an Asian woman. For the reasons I mention above, ... They play with your emotions.

Yes, the P4P girls treat you well. We all know this, e.g. those of us who have actually been with a real woman.

So how about it? I have read TV for long time, and this is my first post, my view is that its 99% little boyz or maybe even some fresh farang meat that's been to Pattaya, or Phuket, .... but so what, I'm in Asia for the long-haul. My friends married to thai-woman experience this same shit, and just tell me to deal with it, but they are ALL married to bar-whores... So its easy for them to toss the gal a $500 baht note when she mo-jo, ... bar-girls are driven by sex and money.

So I paid and paid, and after many years found the perfect girl, from the perfect family. Wise men have said that bar-girls are best, but as we ALL know they all got hubby's and BF's, and gik's on the side. I know that the gal I married is 99% HONEST, this I know. She's a very good woman, just hasn't a clue to not keep her mouth shut.

Like a farang marriage, staying in for 20 years is mostly about tolerating abuse, ... its all too easy to walk, and great advice here to walk to Pattaya? Oh yea, and get what a lady-boy? No thanks. I want a 'real woman'.

So about it? The entire premise of every single website in Thailand is ran by lawyers hustling their services and great virtues of thai woman, but as we ALL KNOW the ONLY good thai girl you'll ever find from a farang point of view is a GFE from the street, bar, or club. Yes, these are the best, ... but it's all about money.

So now I have the thai wife, and its really not about money, she just doesn't have a clue about how to live with another person, or a man. As you all know, thai-men really don't talk, and most thai girls are intimate with their friends. I really think thai-women see the farang as a toy. They ALL want a farang, but when they finally get one, .. NOW WHAT, I think this is the post marriage syndrome.

Wise men here know that I'm not alone, ... so how do you guys deal with this?? I'm not going to walk, I'll give it 3-5 years, ... tossing her pocket change like all my bud's do with their bar-whore wives ain't going to work. Her parents are rich.

Please somebody give me some tangible advice, or it proves once and for all that TV is just a bunch of losers who don't have clue about what they claim to know.

[sokal]

So what, dear experts, is his agenda ? Why spend so much time composing such a long post if it is not genuine ? He may have a valid reason for going back home for a visit.

Thaibean, there may well be value in listening to the local experts.....your Thai female friends.

Thanks latindancer sounds like you got a heart. I note that 99% of the reponse here is from little boys that only know about women from smelling their sisters underwear. Yes, I'm posted this from the States, had to come back for my fathers funeral. But I'll be back in two weeks in Nahkon Sawan.

So how about it guys? How about telling me how to live this woman? FYI: Yes, ... house, car, $2M sin-sod, $200k tung-mung, ... you name it I paid, and yes like I said, the parents are jewels.

I'm not looking for help from the 99% here that only know about women from smelling their sisters under-wear, I'm looking for advice here from a real man who has conqured this set of problems. When I was younger and wiser there is no way in hel_l I would have married an Asian woman. For the reasons I mention above, ... They play with your emotions.

Yes, the P4P girls treat you well. We all know this, e.g. those of us who have actually been with a real woman.

So how about it? I have read TV for long time, and this is my first post, my view is that its 99% little boyz or maybe even some fresh farang meat that's been to Pattaya, or Phuket, .... but so what, I'm in Asia for the long-haul. My friends married to thai-woman experience this same shit, and just tell me to deal with it, but they are ALL married to bar-whores... So its easy for them to toss the gal a $500 baht note when she mo-jo, ... bar-girls are driven by sex and money.

So I paid and paid, and after many years found the perfect girl, from the perfect family. Wise men have said that bar-girls are best, but as we ALL know they all got hubby's and BF's, and gik's on the side. I know that the gal I married is 99% HONEST, this I know. She's a very good woman, just hasn't a clue to not keep her mouth shut.

Like a farang marriage, staying in for 20 years is mostly about tolerating abuse, ... its all too easy to walk, and great advice here to walk to Pattaya? Oh yea, and get what a lady-boy? No thanks. I want a 'real woman'.

So about it? The entire premise of every single website in Thailand is ran by lawyers hustling their services and great virtues of thai woman, but as we ALL KNOW the ONLY good thai girl you'll ever find from a farang point of view is a GFE from the street, bar, or club. Yes, these are the best, ... but it's all about money.

So now I have the thai wife, and its really not about money, she just doesn't have a clue about how to live with another person, or a man. As you all know, thai-men really don't talk, and most thai girls are intimate with their friends. I really think thai-women see the farang as a toy. They ALL want a farang, but when they finally get one, .. NOW WHAT, I think this is the post marriage syndrome.

Wise men here know that I'm not alone, ... so how do you guys deal with this?? I'm not going to walk, I'll give it 3-5 years, ... tossing her pocket change like all my bud's do with their bar-whore wives ain't going to work. Her parents are rich.

Please somebody give me some tangible advice, or it proves once and for all that TV is just a bunch of losers who don't have clue about what they claim to know.

Be a bigger a$$hole. Take charge, tell her to do things. I have never had experience with this in the middle of a relationship though. I am usually an ahole right from the start.

[LuckyLew]

One must ask "why is she in a bad mood"

Maybe OP is just too dull ... doesn't seem to do much

[Latindancer]

Sokal and LuckyLew may have good points here, but if you "try this, try that", you may come unstuck in a big way.

If you buy an expensive car, and something goes wrong, do you post on an internet forum to ask the advice of every person who sees your post, about what to do to fix it yourself ? Or do you take it to an expert ? I know that, in a sense, you are asking if any of us are experts, and if we have had the same problem and were successful in solving it. However I suggest you speak to a Thai psychologist who speaks good English. There must be some around ! There are PLENTY of doctors and dentists in Bangkok who have trained in the West and who speak very good English. You have invested a lot of time, emotional energy, money, and your life itself, into this marriage, and you want to make the best possible moves in dealing with this problem. And if you're humble enough to admit it, you have to admit that it takes two to Tango, so your behaviour / attitudes may be part of he problem. MAY.

I'm half-inclined to agree with Sokal though ! However this may cause the hole thing to blow up in your face.

Have you tried talking privately to her parents ? Through a translator, if necessary ?

Don't forget also that you are living in a different culture, and there may be established ways to deal with this, aside from getting a mistress or throwing her money etc. For instance, in Thai culture, politeness is regarded as a great virtue. If you become a bigger A--hole than her, you have descended to her level. If you discuss the issue rationally and calmly, she will (hopefully) respect you. And you will have the advantage of the "moral high ground", if you see my meaning. If you become an A-hole, that gives anyone involved the moral right to treat you like dirt.

I once had a GF like her in Australia, who I later realized had a personality disorder.

You're going to have to look at specific occurrences and her reaction to them, and ask rationally and reasonably why she reacted the way she did, in each instance.

Second-best bet : a Western psychologist who knows a little about Thai culture.

[Nio]

First the OP points out she speaks perfect english then he states "I Mo-Jo take it or leave it" make your own conclusions if that is perfect English or not

In the OP mind he is an angelic farang? OK sure thing. Say hi to the Pope for me.

35 years old what is her past history?

Married before?

If answer is yes, you already have all the answers you need

If the answer is no, ask your self how many "10's" in Thailand make it to age 35 alone

If it looks like a fish, swims like a fish and smells like a fish...

Something very fishy about this story

[chiangmaikelly]

By the time I had worked my way to wife number three I had become a bit jaded. However wife three seemed the solution to those problems. She had gone from chief hospital administrator to stripper at the peek a boo lounge. We frolicked our way through a fun courtship of nudist resorts both in the States and abroad and swinging clubs in at home and away. Life was looking good. I wasn't bored and spent my vacation time in hot tubs full of women au natural and dancing the nights away in entertainment venues full of like minded people who made anything that happens in Pattaya seem like a kindergarten exercise.

I was happy. I thought she was happy. Then we got married.

Ten minutes after the marriage ceremony was over in the car on the way to the reception dinner she put her foot on mine and braked the car to a stop. Grabbed my shoulders and turned me towards her and said in a stern voice, "I want you to know I take our marriage vows seriously. The swinging is over the nudist thing is over and you are going to become a good husband to me and father to our son (my stepson)."

I said <deleted>!

A year later she had gained 40 pounds, cut off all of her long black waist length hair. I had a fat round pumpkin woman who looked like a poster child for the feminist lobby.

I have known many lovely women in Thailand both from the entertainment industry and outside. I speak passable Thai and have a job and condo in Thailand. I am well respected in the community and among my peers but I have never gotten up the courage to marry again. For me it is not just Thai women.

I think the same risks are faced in any country.

I can only tell you what I did in the States. I cut my losses and bailed out and came to Thailand.

Thailand was my last resort. And it has worked well for me. I don't know where you can go as I haven't thought about it but maybe there is a hole card for Thailand.

My losses were substantial when I came here but after five years I think I made a wise decision. Not being rich is not so bad. You get used to it.

[jandtaa]

"So how about it? I have read TV for long time, and this is my first post, my view is that its 99% little boyz or maybe even some fresh farang meat that's been to Pattaya, or Phuket"

If this is your opinion after reading TV for a long time I'm suprised you would post here seeking members advice in the hope of getting answers from the other 1% who aren't sniffing there relatives underwear !! Seems a bit of a long shot for such a topic. 

Maybe you should seek marriage guidance councelling at the local Wat where you spend so much of your time. On the otherhand.... whose that trip trapping..?

[Hawk]

Simple, you are being way too passive with her, a few sharp kicks up the ass will bring her back online. If you let her do stupid things then she will. If she threw my clothes out into the street, then she would most certainly follow, head first.

About time you showed your anger, and your authority.

[Loz]

Kelly,

write a book. I'll take the first signed copy!

[chiangmaikelly]

Simple, you are being way too passive with her, a few sharp kicks up the ass will bring her back online. If you let her do stupid things then she will. If she threw my clothes out into the street, then she would most certainly follow, head first.

About time you showed your anger, and your authority.

And then she takes off her shoe and attacks me and the owner of the condo and my next door neighbor who was just hanging around.

The police come and throw me out of the condo. I end up paying for the medical care of the condo owner, my next door neighbor and the lady pays the cops 500 baht.

Up to you

[DP25]

"So how about it? I have read TV for long time, and this is my first post, my view is that its 99% little boyz or maybe even some fresh farang meat that's been to Pattaya, or Phuket"

If this is your opinion after reading TV for a long time I'm suprised you would post

I'm sure it's only his first post with that account.

[IanForbes]

Working on the assumption that the OP's topic is not a troll, Moronfarang probably gave the best answer. Lioness also gave a good reply in a general way of living with a woman. There is a valid reason why over 50% of first time marriages fail and over 60% of second time marriages fail. And, of the marriages that DO last beyond 10 years there is only a small percentage of the spouses (both men and women) that are truly satisfied. I've seen it all, heard it all and experienced it myself. There are exceptions to every case, but the percentages don't lie. If you like those odds then you are more gambler than me.

As far as advice for the OP is concerned it is up to him. Live with it or take off despite whatever financial loss it costs him. Your sanity is a whole lot more valuable than trying to live in hel_l. You come to realize in your later years that possessions are just a bunch of crap that tie you down. Most of us have far more stuff than we actually need, and most of which we can do without. You can only sit on one chair at a time and sleep in one bed at a time. Cooking and cleaning for yourself is simple if you don't mind the hassle, but having others do it for you is cheap in Asia.

My big house in Canada is just a place to store my toys. My toys are just possessions to make my life more interesting. If I lost them I could always buy more. The OP doesn't seem to be lacking for money, so getting some place new to live should not be a factor in leaving all his "stuff" with the ex. Think of it as her giving you back your freedom for what really is a paltry price.

[BlackGrape]

Live with it or take off despite whatever financial loss it costs him

Mr Forbes, u are a very smart man! Can I PM you for relationship issues ie I lost 5MB to my father in law? haha

[cdnvic]

Judging from the posts I had to delete, some people obviously have some deep seated, sometimes violent resentment towards women, and a therapist is the place to air it, not here.