Jump to content
Login with your Gmail HERE and start posting in seconds! ×

Warning: Tesco Toilet Users

MattCinderey
 Share

Recommended Posts

MattCinderey Silver Member

MattCinderey

Posted
Posted

Tesco Lamai have moved the toilet roll holders out of the cubicles... So it's necessary to take the toilet roll in with you before your dump.

Be careful, you have been warned!... You could be left on the seat with no toilet roll and they don't have ar*e-sprays either. Dangerous.

Matt.

  • Replies 49
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Rooo Star Member

Rooo

Posted
Posted

Matt, one more post like that & we will have to dump your posting rights & suspend your daily supplies of Iced Birdie for a week. :D & on a Sunday morning too. :)

Just imagine you sitting in there calling out :D , you would have had people running out scared.

Rooo Star Member

Rooo

Posted
Posted
For such an incident always have the number of the toilette manager stored in your mobile phone.

:):D :D Better still get Big C's # ,he would sort them out for you.

neverdie Star Member

neverdie

Posted
Posted
Wouldn't be the first time a cellphone was used as a spade...I'm sure.

Yuuck!

Just sayin...

Ads a new meaning to the term 'speakin <deleted>' :)

bridge Silver Member

bridge

Posted
Posted
Matt, one more post like that & we will have to dump your posting rights & suspend your daily supplies of Iced Birdie for a week. :D & on a Sunday morning too. :)

Just imagine you sitting in there calling out :D , you would have had people running out scared.

Do it Rooo, he has had it coming for a long time.

MattCinderey Silver Member

MattCinderey

Posted
  • Author
Posted

No, I was OK. I luckily noticed the toilet paper outside and the notices before entering the cubicle, just wanted to put the word out... :D

Could be dangerous if you've had a curry the night before or a red hot kra-prow guy, got the rumbles, then just made it to the toilet in time only to reach for the toilet paper... :D

I'll openly admit I crapped my pants here once... I thought I could squeeze a silent one out... Turns out it wasn't wind... :)

smokie36 Star Member

smokie36

Posted
Posted

What a bunch of girls on the forum. You should try travelling through rural India....

Left hand and a toilet flushing mechanism is a luxury better get used to left hand and a few leaves. :)

Edit: And never swim downstream of the village.

crusty Silver Member

crusty

Posted
Posted
I'm still sat here... :D

Posted from I-phone.

:) Look Matt, this happens at some places like Samui and Utaphao airports, but you learn to improvise. Press the flush lever, quickly dive your mitt between your legs into the water turbulence and upward splash into the gash ! Also it is a lot more hygenic than paper wipes that leave "trails" Uuuggghhhh!

MattCinderey Silver Member

MattCinderey

Posted
  • Author
Posted

I like your style crusty. I guess you must remember to stand whilst doing the first flush, otherwise it could be nasty...

The ar*e sprayer is the best invention since sliced-bread...

I went back to the UK for a week about 7 months ago, they only had toilet paper back home. You get so used to the ar*e spray it's horrible wiping with paper... smear it off... Yuck.

smokie36 Star Member

smokie36

Posted
Posted

Ok when I'm in the UK I use a refilled litre bottle of water with the nozzle thing. Same effect as the bum gun and saves a few quid. Eco friendly too. :)

MattCinderey Silver Member

MattCinderey

Posted
  • Author
Posted
Ok when I'm in the UK I use a refilled litre bottle of water with the nozzle thing. Same effect as the bum gun and saves a few quid. Eco friendly too. :D

Nice touch! A tad awkward I guess.

Luckily my family have a bidet back in the UK. You need to get the temperature right, you don't want to scorch your b*lls...

However, when I was last in the UK I used both my Mum & Dad's toothbrushes... just to teach them a lesson for all those years being tortured as a teenager... :)

Matt.

P.S. I'm joking of course.... :D I used my brothers. :D

smokie36 Star Member

smokie36

Posted
Posted
i know. lucky for my i went in and i bought my dog with me. thank god. dogs are mans best friend. well when there is a toilet shortage. dog really is. daaaaaaa :D

:):D

MattCinderey Silver Member

MattCinderey

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Actually, squat toilets are the optimal way to poo... seriously. It's the natural position to lay a cable... The modern toilet was designed for comfort.

Quote...

For one, squatting opens up the recto-anal angle, allowing the squatter to be a bit more lax when handling business. Sitting down to poop, on the other hand, constricts the passageways and requires more straining to push things through. The Israeli researcher Dr. Berko Sikirov, an especially adamant proponent of the squat method, identified the “underlying mechanism” behind constipation: “the obstructive nature of the recto-anal angle” in the sitting position. Constipation often leads to excessive straining (“at least three-fold more than in a squatting posture”), which has been fingered as a probable cause of colonic diverticulosis by Sikiro

Matt.

P.S. Samuijimmy. Live this one in down?! I have no shame... :)

crusty Silver Member

crusty

Posted
Posted
Actually, squat toilets are the optimal way to poo... seriously. It's the natural position to lay a cable... The modern toilet was designed for comfort.

Quote...

For one, squatting opens up the recto-anal angle, allowing the squatter to be a bit more lax when handling business. Sitting down to poop, on the other hand, constricts the passageways and requires more straining to push things through. The Israeli researcher Dr. Berko Sikirov, an especially adamant proponent of the squat method, identified the "underlying mechanism" behind constipation: "the obstructive nature of the recto-anal angle" in the sitting position. Constipation often leads to excessive straining ("at least three-fold more than in a squatting posture"), which has been fingered as a probable cause of colonic diverticulosis by Sikiro

Matt.

P.S. Samuijimmy. Live this one in down?! I have no shame... :D

:) Brilliant but "laying a cable" ? Bazza used to call it "strangling a darkie" !

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share
Go to topic listing

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.






ASEANNOW

ASEANNOW (formerly Thai Visa) Thailand's oldest and most popular forum for expats and foreigners.

Sign up today and have your say

MORE INFO

POPULAR AREAS

CONTACT US

219/59 Asoke Towers, 15th Floor, Soi Sukhumvit 21, Watthana, Bangkok 10110
(+66) 99 196 1100
[email protected]

×
×
  • Create New...