Beauty Regime

[Boo]

Doc, I will never ever touch the toilet seat in a public place, I always use my foot to lower the seat & then hover above (as mentioned by the other girls, great for the thigh muscles).

mrrentoul, Nat, I have a billion embarrasing drunk stories, will hapily share another day, I am moving house today & while hubby is dismantling all the ceiling fans I am sitting here on my arse replying to this! Ha ha, I really did get a good one

[Nat]

Why is it that girls ( and Michael ) don't object to putting the seat down in a movie theatre ?

Can only speak for myself, but don't object to putting any seat down - just won't sit on a throne I don't know

The toilet seat dilema: should it stay up for the men (I'd hope so ) or down for the women . When one is entertaining and has guests, the seat and lid should always be kept down (also applies when home & garden or hello mag are taking photos). However, when alone feel free to do what ever your heart desires. This may not be possible when living with someone else, so you'll just have to reach a compromise - someone's going to have to make a sacrifice . I've only ever lived with one partner and it never bothered me if the seat was up or down (as long as there were no guests). However, when I was annoyed with him and having a tiff, would bring up that he "never puts the toilet seat down" - I know this is wrong, but I was young at the time and now know better .

[mrentoul]

I will never ever touch the toilet seat in a public place, I always use my foot to lower the seat & then hover above (as mentioned by the other girls, great for the thigh muscles).

No wonder you girls have such great thighs! About the seats in cinemas, I don't mind pulling them down because they pop up by themselves (I think - I haven't been to the cinema in a long time).

When one is entertaining and has guests, the seat and lid should always be kept down

Thank-you for that advice. Toilet should be clean too, if possible, or your guest is in for a nasty surprise.

think I've watched one too many episodes of sex and the city. ps hope the dog bite is better

I can't watch that show...I find it too modern and way too smart for its own good.

The dog bite is healing, I think. Still have bruises there, and still hurts.

If Dracula went for people's legs rather than their throats then I would look like one of his victims - two big fang marks, black on red background (sounds like a fashion statement).

My friends keep asking me if I have develoiped an aversion to water or am unusually thirsty (two signs of rabies, I am told). I am pleased to say I drinking normally and haven't attempted any more dips in the Chao Phraya River.

[Nat]

Toilet should be clean too, if possible, or your guest is in for a nasty surprise.

A nasty surprise in more ways than one. I'm amazed at the amount of mold some people allow to grow in their bathroom - in some cases the original wall is beyond recognition.

I believe that all rooms that the guests could venture in should be clean. I'm sure we've all had the experience of visiting someone and thinking "what a pig sty!" - never want it to be my home that's thought of in that way (my mum and gran would be so proud of me if they read that ). The other thing is to always have something (drinks and nibblies) to serve your guests. Also, make sure there's something in the pantry for those unexpected guests. (I'm starting to scare myself as am sounding more and more like mum and gran - guess all their hard work is starting to pay off )

[mrentoul]

I'm amazed at the amount of mold some people allow to grow in their bathroom - in some cases the original wall is beyond recognition.

One thing I have often wondered is whether staff working for the Queen of England allow her Majesty's shower to grow mouldy...or must they get inside every crack?

I imagine that they move her into a new private apartment every so often, so they can paint the walls and have a go at the bathroom.

The young Mirror reporter who stole inside the Palace under false pretenses did not tell us in his fascinating account of life as a palace footman what happens when Her Majesty's shower moulds over. The Mirror should correct this omission.

These days you don't have to get inside every crack yourself. The Thai guy I live with has bought a can of something which you just spray at the walls. It strips everything away like an oven cleaner.

I sprayed the bathroom a week or so ago and went away for a minute. When I came back the place was full of smoke and I thought the bathroom was on fire. It was just this cleanser going to work. Get too close and it hurts the eyes and nose.

Now, I have a small question concerning manners. If a young man goes out with a girl Bangkok, should he take her to a place which has its own toilet, or can he take her to an outdoors place, perhaps, where staff have to walk a bit to get to a toilet somewhere else? Some outdoor places have an arrangement with shops nearby. Customers can use the toilet there if they need to go.

This is probably not so important if the girl concerned is used to squatting, either on the seat Thai-style or simply over the bowl. But in the absence of a toilet a place may still seem a little basic and perhaps a gentleman should warn a girl beforehand that she may have to walk aways before she can relieve herself.

What do you think?

[sbk]

Nat, don't you know that old saying? The more you age, the more you get like your mother? My dad always said "look at the mother, if you like her then her daughter will be ok, if not then watch out!" Don't know if the same holds true for guys, that they get more like their dads (hopefully not their mothers!). I suspect alot of how a guy ages depends on the wife.

Mrentoul, ooh, tricky question! Guess it depends on the girl, if you are taking out a high-class girl (or a farang girl new to Asia), best to go to a place with a nice toilet, anyplace that doesn't have one of its own will probably be too grotty anyway! If she is not a newbie or she is just a normal Thai girl, then go right ahead, she will be prepared for anything, most likely having already encountered the most disgusting toilet in Asia elsewhere! Boy, that could be a new thread, couldn't it? "Most disgusting toilet experience in Asia"!

[Nat]

These days you don't have to get inside every crack yourself.

Guess it would be quite tiring, particularly for the male, an extra hand can be useful

Would have to agree with sbk regarding the toilet. If the girl is the "high maintenance" type than best to take her to a proper establishment, with a flush toilet. However, if she's quite chilled and been around south east asia than it's fine. It also depends if it's a date - in which case one would try to impress a girl and probably better to play it safe (unless you know her well enough). If the female is a mate, well than it really doesn't matter, just as longer as there is a toilet .

ps sbk my friends like my mum more than me - she just gets better with age (learning to relax and enjoy life) so guess I'm lucky

[munchkin]

hi nat - you should be a saleswoman....or are you already. i'm dead keen to try this sk-II/11 or whatever. you said you found it at the emporium....i've never been to the emporium, but will be shopping in BK next week. what's at the emporium? and where exactly can this miracle cream be found?? my skin's never been so hideous in all me life!

[Nat]

hi nat - you should be a saleswoman....or are you already.

far from it - just passionate about things I like

Welcome munchkin

I was very impressed with emporium - if you're into designer stuff it's great. I'm going to sound geekie but got excited about the bookshops . Now about sk-ll (sk-2, using roman numerals), it's quite pricey, for instance a 150ml bottle of the facial treatment essence (90% Pitera) is about 3600 baht (or close to that), however it lasts about 6 months. There is also the eye cream, moisturiser, cleanser etc. - heaps of products. As with all skincare regimens it depends on skin type (I have combination skin and suffer from the dreaded T-zone). My regimen was done at the counter in Selfridges (London) - that in itself was an interesting experience. The beautician took out a little gadget which measured the amount of moisture in my skin, it's effect in regards to wrinkles and the various pressure points in the face - I was sucked in straight away . Seriously though, speak to one of the beauticians at the counter, and they'll advise which regimen would be best for your skin type. Make sure you do a patch test first as we don't want you breaking out from an allergic reaction. Good luck and keep us posted on the progress of your skin.

ps always make sure you drink plenty of water - it alone can do wonders for the skin.

[mrentoul]

. If the girl is the "high maintenance" type than best to take her to a proper establishment, with a flush toilet.

Can boys be high maintenance types? If so, what are they like?

And do they flash their underwear at girls at outdoor drinking spots? (Not me, I hasten to add).

[munchkin]

thanks nat! if i can drag myself away from siam and MBk, i'll be at emporium next week trying to sort my face out!!

am presently drinking oodles of water...!

[Nat]

Can boys be high maintenance types? If so, what are they like?

And do they flash their underwear at girls at outdoor drinking spots? (Not me, I hasten to add).

Absolutely! (and I'm not talking about the gay ones either - that's a completely different thread).

The high maintenance boy tends to have been spoilt at birth and everything they did was wonderful (even if that was biting off the cats ear, for instance). Their entire life their mummy (and other significant females) have done everything for them. They do not move out of home until they either: (a) find a woman who takes up the roles the mother performed - off course with the mother still involved, or (b ) have enough money to pay other people to do everything for them. They are the type who'll have a hissy fit if they get anything on their clothing and would never dream of using a public toilet unless it's up to the standard of a 5 star delux hotel and has extra soft bog roll. They generally look down on most people around them, and believe it's ok to be rude to those less fortunate than themselves.

Generally they wouldn't flash at a girl in an outdoor drinking spot (as they wouldn't want to ruffle their shirt) - however after quite a few drinks with the lads they may shout out some obscene comment such as "show us your map of tassie" (or maybe something less creative).

[mrentoul]

Nat, darling - a wonderful post. Best I've read in six months.

How can you have so much creative juice left after all that constructive marking?

(and I'm not talking about the gay ones either - that's a completely different thread).

Let's start it here! What's a high-maintenance gay type?

has extra soft bog roll

This must be a curse for companies making toilet rolls. How to make it soft, but also firm enough so it doesn't go through your fingers? The paper, the paper...God, what were you thinking?

They do not move out of home until they either: (a) find a woman who takes up the roles the mother performed - off course with the mother still involved

My mother was not involved in my first serious relationship, despite my relative youth (20, 21) and the embarrassing age gap between me and the other party (14 years).

In hindsight, I should have let her have her say(No!)

Generally they wouldn't flash at a girl in an outdoor drinking spot (as they wouldn't want to ruffle their shirt)

So he's not a shirtlifter, then?

[mrentoul]

We were talking about this topic a while ago - how women urinate in public toilets - but as this groovy website says, a lot of water has passed under the bridge since then.

This site tells you how to pee while standing up. Even comes with a pic of man and woman standing side by side in a urinal. A must see.

www.restrooms.org/standing.html

[Nat]

This site tells you how to pee while standing up. Even comes with a pic of man and woman standing side by side in a urinal. A must see.

www.restrooms.org/standing.html

What on earth will they think of next! I especially liked the readers views - some people really do scare me

Must say will give it a miss - even though I believe in equality for women, this is just taking it too far

[Flipper]

On the men and beauty side of things, I think my Thai man is definately on the sparse side of things. A periodic hair-cut and beard trip and twice daily showers is about it. Despite this and a fairly heavy drinking regime, he still looks younger than a lot of his friends. And I think younger and better looking than his younger brother who showers abuot 3 times a day (each time for about 30 mins) and then spends another 30 mins closeted away with various skin and hair products. Thankfully I picked the older brother, the younger one drives me nuts as whenever we plan to go somewhere, that is when he starts to get ready!!!! Over an hour later we can go. And he still doesn't look good.

Top tip for skin care in Thailand - stay out of Bangkok.

Failing that, get a mask.

Regular facials are great too. My small town in the middle of nowhere even has a few hairdressers that are moving into beauty treatments so am trying them out. Excellent for stress relief as is a trip to the hairdresser. Not so much the actual cut but the 20 mins wash and head massage beforehand! I will never be able to face a haircut in the UK again.

Happy girly talk everyone

Flipper

[Khutan]

Just out of interest, is there SPF 15+ moisteuriser available in Thailand.

My wife loves the stuff as it keeps the sun off her face, but we have only ever seen it in Australia.

Anyone have a comment ?

[mrentoul]

Thankfully I picked the older brother, the younger one drives me nuts as whenever we plan to go somewhere, that is when he starts to get ready!!!! Over an hour later we can go. And he still doesn't look good.

They both sound like nice guys to me. I have friends who spend an hour in front of the mirror. Tedious, I know.

But I think it's great these two brothers can go out together. You must have a lot of fun.

[mrentoul]

I read a post on a Thai webboard today where a woman asked why men never start the sex thing these days...why they seem too shy or scared or whatever...and why women have to do absolutely everything, even in bed!

That started me thinking about 'real men' and whether they exist any more. Then I happened to catch sight of myself in the mirror and I thought - well, you can hardly talk!

About 20 years ago actor Jack Nicholson played a retired astronaut in the film Terms of Endearment. His stand-out scene, as they say, was the bed scene with Shirley Maclean. He took off his shirt only to reveal...a sagging pot belly! Critics admired his courage for showing the world what a middle-aged man really looks like.

Contemplating my 38 year-old body today I think I have already reached the middle-aged look, and I suspect there's not much I can do about it. Shoot back 10 years and I would have been horrified if I saw my body today.

I suspect it's a combination of things...too much Thai food, too much sitting in front of a computer. It's a lifestyle thing. In 1973, when Nicholson starred as a navy tearaway in The Last Detail, he was a young, handsome guy with a moustache. Computers weren't around then. People lived real lives. And yet he was only two years younger than me.

So, what can be done with a body that's over the hill (please - don't say the gym). I run, but it's not enough.

The good news is, Thais seem to like me no matter how ugly I get. This really is the most flattering place in which to live. But then, they haven't seen the body underneath my clothes.

Just as well Bangkok police are enforcing a new shirts-on rule for westerners, I think, or we might all be unsettled by what we saw.

[Nat]

women have to do absolutely everything, even in bed!

I know quite tiring actually.......but then it is great exercise

"Real men", that's an interesting one - quite hard to define what that is these days esp when you've got people like Beckham (the original metrosexual) as a role model. This scares me as it gives people an unrealistic view of reality. We're all heading toward that hill, some are climbing it and some are over it just have to accept it. I know this is easier sad than done, but as long as you've got your health that's all that matters, right?

Suggest you stop paying attention to the reflection in the mirror (they lie you know ) and go for the person who'll luv ya warts and all (or should that be love handles and all ).

mattnich - is that moisturiser for the face or body?

Not to sound like a broken record, but SK-II facial moisturiser has SPF in it. So do many others, just a matter of visiting some of the beauty counters and finding the right one for the skin type. If you mean moisturiser for the body haven't seen any with SPF - but then I haven't been looking for it as personally find it a bit too greasy and doesn't absorb as well.

[impy_la_blimpy]

Hey all!

Having an awful time with my skin at the moment - normally it's flawless.

Getting back to the original topic [although I read the 'nose-business' with great hilarity, and can fully understand what people were saying. Personally I can't stand the idea of a HANKY and always use a tissue - far more hygenic as you can throw away immediately after a discreet, private blow; hence hanky and said germified contents are immediately disposed of!!]

ANYWAY - Nat - skin stuff can be a nightmare for us girlies - but as a friend of mine once said - you only need to worry when you DON'T get pimples . . .means you're gettin' old!! lol

I think the wet-wipe idea's great . . .although I'm always paranoid about the wipes drying out my skin! Just try a number of things until your skin settles down - it'll happen!!

Good luck

Imp

[impy_la_blimpy]

Contemplating my 38 year-old body today I think I have already reached the middle-aged look, and I suspect there's not much I can do about it. Shoot back 10 years and I would have been horrified if I saw my body today.

Ahhhhhh Mrentoul

Don't beat yourself up over stuff like that. I like to keep in shape generally - [and after some of the horrific posts I've read on this site about how apparantly loathesome ferang chicks are in comparison to Thai women . . . . it's a good job!!]

However, I really gotta say, that we're all human - we all sh1t brown - and striving to be happy & healthy is the most important thing. So the next time you look in the mirror - think how lucky your are to be here - and how lucky you are to be you!! Life's fantastic You're fine I'm sure!

Keep on truckin

Imp

[Boo]

Gotta agree with impy on this MrR, I personaly prefer my guys on the chubby side, it's his pot belly & chunkiness that I love most about my husband, personaly I've never found skinny guys to be a turn on & luckily found one of the few thai guys with a "normal" build (i.e. not toothpick thin) & guys who are obsessed with their looks & spend hours at the gym & preening have always made me cringe, having a heathy respect for your body & looks is one thing, but for me, a bit of a paunch & flaws are what make a person all the more lovable. Embrace your body & think of Jack, he couldn't care less & has women 30 years younger falling at his feet, yes, he's famous but it's also confidence & style, just ask my dad, 56years old & his motto in life is "your only as young as the woman you feel" currently he's 31!

[mrentoul]

Embrace your body & think of Jack, he couldn't care less & has women 30 years younger falling at his feet, yes, he's famous but it's also confidence & style

One reason I like him is that he knows how to grow old gracefully....as you say, with confidence and style.

So, thank you. I shall think of him next time I look in the mirror. I'll think: ''Only another 20 years to go!''

[impy_la_blimpy]

and how lucky your are to have another 20

Let your glass alwats be half full

Imp

[mrentoul]

Face invader

Spectator, London

Jan 3

Sam Leith has a facial — and is troubled to find that he has to remove all his clothes.

I haven’t felt like this since I last went to visit the dental hygienist with my mum. I’m standing in a coolly antiseptic reception room, mooching and scuffing my feet and sighing theatrically, while my travelling companion discusses ‘treatments’ for me with the uniformed lady behind the desk.

‘Really? What a coincidence! I’m insane too.’

I have hitherto made it my practice not to have much truck with beauty treatments, on the grounds that they are time-consuming, bogus, expensive, and for girls — and that they offer a uniquely revolting and contradictory marriage of late capitalist excess and hippy rhetoric. Moreover, I am a firm believer in the ancient Scottish saying ‘You cannae polish a turd.’

But my travelling companion is a lady of some forcefulness — and I fear greatly her reaction to seeing my ‘free-treatment-of-your-choice’ voucher going to waste. A long menu of options designed to ‘soothe’, ‘invigorate’, ‘pamper’ or ‘restore essential B-Omega vitamins and oxygenate tired eyes’ is presented to me. I can be wrapped in seaweed, smeared in mud, or otherwise immersed in a range of things one normally tries to wash off in the bath. No thanks. I fear the humiliation of a pedicurist running screaming from my feet, and ever since an embarrassing misunderstanding at a massage parlour in Chinatown in New York, I have had issues with back-rubs. A ‘men’s facial’, then, sounds the most painless of the lot. No need to get my clothes off. I’ll just sit in a chair, let them bung some cream on my face, and then return to the bar having proved my open-mindedness.

So sure enough, five minutes later, here I am with another tranquil lady in a uniform saying, ‘Take off all your clothes.’ But it’s my face that’s at issue. Look. Here it is. Are you going to do a facial on my torso? No dice. She indicates a wooden locker filled with fluffy white towels, a soft white dressing-gown, a pair of flip-flops, and then shimmers out. No one, she says, will disturb me. Nevertheless, I put the gown on before I shed my shreddies. I wait for my personal therapist in an ominous white antechamber. On the low wooden coffee table is a form for me to fill out. It asks me whether I use an IUD. I tick the box for ‘no’. Somewhere a little way off, essential oils are being vapourised. There is a definite sense of whalesong. It is soothing. I am terrified.

Finally my personal therapist, dressed in a white uniform, arrives and leads me through a slatted wooden door, down a white corridor lined with slatted wooden doors, and into a white private room. Aromatherapy candles are burning. In the centre of the room is a white bed/chair, cantilevered into the shape of a supine zed, with a white blanket and white sheets on it. Beside it are a pair of nameless punishment machines with Anglepoise necks that belong in a Sylvia Plath poem, or a Terry Gilliam film, or at the dentist.

‘Take off your robe and lie down here,’ she says, sliding a hand under the tightly tucked-in sheet. ‘I’ll be back in a moment.’ She leaves the room. I slide in quickly and pull the covers as far up as I can. So now I am lying on my back, tightly tucked in, stark naked and completely defenceless. For a facial. When she returns, to my horror, she lifts up the edge of the sheet. ‘Put your arms under here.’ All that is now sticking out of my Z-shaped cocoon are my head and shoulders. I realise suddenly why they make you strip; make you — in defiance of Victorian convention — keep your arms under the covers; make you remove all forms of jewellery or clothing that could serve as a prop to your identity or individual will. It’s so that you can’t defend yourself or run away.

I close my eyes, and she starts slathering my face with a sort of cool gunk and pushing it up my nose. Then, just as I am adjusting to that, she changes pace and starts to attack me with a pair of scouring pads. I am starting to feel disoriented. Now she’s laying — what? — what feel like slices of warm Edam on my eyes ...there is a painfully hot sensation on my left cheek and the sound of a machine ...doing ...something. Hot. Hard to breathe. Like when you sit too close to the fire in a sauna. At some point in all this, I become aware that she is trying to sell me things. ‘It says on your questionnaire that you wash your face with soap,’ she says. ‘Yup,’ I say, feeling pleased with myself. ‘Almost every day.’ ‘That’s very bad,’ she says. She offered a ‘very good-value’ cleanser suitable for my skin type that she’d be happy to charge to my room. And another potion that, she said, would help to lighten the ‘discolouration’ under my eyes (I like that discolouration. I’ve had bruised eyes since I was born.) I mumble apologetically that I’ll wait till I am vertical to go shopping for cosmetics.

She mutters something and I sense her wandering off. Has she gone for a fag? How long am I to be left here with this dragon breathing on my cheek and this cheese on my eyes? If I take the cheese off, in order to find out what’s going on, will I see her standing there, waiting to catch me out, and preparing further punishments? I daren’t take the risk. I wait. And wait.

I’m starting to drift, when comes a sudden, bright light, an adjustment, and the hot breath of steam subsides. Sweat cools on my cheeks. The slices are lifted from my eyes. Then suddenly, jeepers, she’s at me with the scouring pads again. And no sooner does that stop than she is spritzing me with Windolene. She pats my face dry. And then, with ferocious vigour, she starts squeezing my spots. This wasn’t in the manifesto.

‘Ouch!’ says my nose. ‘Ssssh,’ I say. ‘We’re all in this together.’ ‘Dough we’re dot,’ says my nose, and then, again, ‘ouch!’ as my personal therapist goes after blocked pores that I hesitate to tackle myself. My eyes start to water. My personal therapist is making approving noises about what is ‘coming out’. I honestly, honestly don’t want to know.

Then she massages a layer of butter or possibly marge into my forehead and cheeks before announcing, ‘This is your facial.’ (What was all that so far? Foreplay?) Another layer of goo is applied in some detail and then she lays a fresh pair of cheese slices over my eyes, as you might throw a blanket over the parrot’s cage or hood a hawk. I hear her voice, murmuring, whether to herself or to a collaborator somewhere in the corner of the room. Then a soft click, and she is gone.

I try to compose my thoughts, but this bed contraption is oddly comfortable, and my mind is starting to drift. Mmm. Focus, I try to tell myself, but an endless loop of infernal smooth jazz is being piped out of speakers somewhere. It saps the will and scrambles my ability to think sequentially. Nakedness, depersonalisation, submission, passivity, mental distraction, disorientation — these are the classic tools of the brainwasher, the CIA interrogator, proprietors of jazz clubs everywhere, I think. But it’s comfy. Are there drugs in the candles? My will to escape is dwindling. I wonder whether I will find myself, three weeks from now, in another white room somewhere far away, drinking a farewell toast to the world with a cup of grape-flavour Kool-Aid. Perhaps that wouldn’t be so bad. It’s warm here. Mmm. Aaah. Comfy. Horrible, horrible music. Comfy.

Minutes pass, possibly hours. And suddenly I feel cool air around my eyes, my facial is being towelled off me, and I am encouraged to get up and get dressed. I feel very, very peculiar. First chance I get, I sneak a look in a mirror. Do you know what? I look suspiciously like me.

[et33.com]

carry a tube of facial wash

must be one of those with moisture

otherwise if you wash off too much natural oil

your skin will be worst than before...

[Nat]

if you wash off too much natural oil

your skin will be worst than before...

This is actually true - apparently oily skin slows some of the signs of ageing, such as age spots, fine lines, wrinkles etc. Have a fear of crows feet - am still too young to have wrinkles but always check out the anti-wrinkle creams at the beauty counters

[sbk]

I think the high humidity of living here has really kept my wrinkles at bay, I'm 37 and am usually mistaken for 27-28. One lovely young man back home even checked my ID last year! I nearly kissed him! I am also blessed with good genes and have been sensible enough not to sunbathe regularly. I actually find it extremely dull and even as a teenager never sunbathed. I don't smoke (haven't since I was 21) and don't drink heavily. Boring stuff I admit but being mistaken for 10 years younger on a regular basis makes it all worthwhile!

[Nat]

I don't smoke (haven't since I was 21) and don't drink heavily.

sbk I'm impressed - wish I had the same self-discipline. Don't smoke anymore but giving up the drink would be hard but then red wine is good for ones health.

Got to luv being asked for ID . Was told last week I looked 23, it made my day - ignored the fact the person that told me was drunk as a skunk