First i'd like to apologize to the ladies on this board for this male intrusion.

Having said that, I'd like to ask the ladies here a question about my 19 year old daughter. She is coming with me to Bangkok to live with my new Wife who is a Thai Chinese lady. She will also be attending one of the international colleges I know my Daughter will miss America (or western culture for that matter) and was wondering if there are any groups or such she can join to ease her into Bangkok?

Do any of you have any suggestions? Any help would be greatly appreciated!

Greg

HI Griser, Welcome to the farang girls section, I'm sure that when your daughter starts at the international college that she will make a lot of new freinds, both thai & foreign, she could also join one of the local sports centres (if she is into that sort of thing) & maybe speak to Kurt on the expat communty section for more ideas of western meeting points. I think the problem your daughter is going to come across is that most of the expats here will be considerably older than her (myself by 10 years) so it is probably better that she makes her own way around & the college will most likely be the place for her to get a network of friends. She could also hang around western haunts but as most of these are bars & clubs, I'm not sure how you will like that idea! But Gullivers on Khoa San Road has a lot of people her own age hanging around, the only problem is that they are backpackers so not around for very long!

Any other of the girls or guys got any ideas?

first let me just say that this is a situation that older generation well never understand, I know that you want the best for your daughter.

(in my opinion) why not let her stay in the US for college, by taken her to Thailand you are robbing her of her college year, there are no college in Thailand that can be compare to the state, education is important for her future, Thailand is lack of so many thing for a grown teenage,

I'm in between 20-30 luckily I have finish my college before I came to Thailand, other than that Thailand have nothing to offer me, I’m young fresh and full of joys, US and Thailand is two different world, it might be fun for many adult, but for young people its no joys and fun, she will lack of knowledge if she stay in Thailand for a long period of time, you have to understand that US move quite quickly, Thailand is very very slow

I'm not sure how you will like that idea!  But Gullivers on Khoa San Road has a lot of people her own age hanging around, the only problem is that they are backpackers so not around for very long!

Im sorry Boo but i find Khoa San Road quite disgusting, its no place for a teenage especially for a girl, bars and bums, weirdo walk the street, but that's my opinion nobody have to listen

Thanks for the Advice so far. I really appreciate it. But as far as leaving her.... I can't. It's mostly a financial/custody thing (her mom can't afford to keep her) so she has to come with me. She really is looking foward to going! You know teenagers. always looking for new adventures.

Greg

I think you have no choice but to take her with you here in Thailand. I am Thai and used to live in the US. I totally understand your situation. If she feels ok to live with you and her step mother in a new environment, that's good. She's still very young and can readjust herself far more easiler that the older ones. The only problem is that the education systems in Thaland are not suitable for her. You learn things by asking questions. Here, we just have to listen and do what the teachers said. It's absolutely stupid 'cause we cannot improve our abilities in thinking analytically. Anyway, hope she'll be fine in Thailand.

Griser, welcome to the forum, I think, since we are discussing a "farang girl in thailand" then you have come to the right place!

In some respects I have to agree with both Tomy and Golf, even an international college will not really prepare her for life in the US, educational standards are often not that high. That said, I think at least one year of overseas experience will be very good and very eye-opening for her. I am of the opinion that every American student should live overseas for awhile. Perhaps if everyone did it, americans would be a little less american-centered and a little more globally aware.

I have to ask you if you or your ex wife have looked into financial aid for your daughter? It has been some years (won't go into how many! but not too long) since I graduated from college but my parents were quite broke at the time and I managed to get by on full financial aid and working part-time as well. I had good grades so that helped alot. It was alot of hard work, but I feel I really earned my degree. There are really alot of options open to students whose parents are unable to pay for their schooling. I suggest, if after a year here, you feel her education is lacking (and it probably will be, to be totally honest), then a good guidance/financial aid counselor at the university of her choice would be able to steer her in the right direction.

And believe it or not, Tomy had another good point! I live on Koh Phangan, a major young people, backpacker destination and most of these people pass through Khao San Road. I have seen my fair share of weirdos, bums and users (people and drugs). I personally would not want someone I care about spending any real time at Khao San, most of the people there are just short-term holiday makers out to have as good a time as possible, and that usually means, getting as drunk or drugged as possible. The occasional visit might be alright but probably best to steer her away from such a scene. She would do better socializing with people she meets at school.

What she will need from you and your wife is alot of understanding and companionship until she finds her feet here. Enrolling her in a good language course would go far to making her feel like she fits in. Also, ask your wife if she knows any english-speaking thai people near your daughter's age that could show her around. Good luck, and introduce her to the board when she arrives, if she has any questions I am sure all of us women would be happy to answer them.

Hi griser and welcome.

Your daughter will probably have the best luck meeting people and socialising through her college. She is 19 so will soon be going to uni - I'm guessing? This will open a completely new world to her. From my understanding the international schools are quite good. Actually, met a westerner the other week who went to one and had nothing but great things to say - apparently their school even had drug testing, to make sure there were no "bad" influences. She will definantly miss her lifestyle, but especially her friends - 19 can be a sensitive age for some girls (or I should say ladies ). Hope she has a great time and feel free to pop into the ladies lounge with your queries

Gotta say, that the attitude to backpackers is so low, I'm really surprised. Not all are druggies or loons, some are normal students, on a year out, so the perfect age for grisers daughter, if she was craving western conversation with people her own age I think that KS would be perfect for her. It all depends on her personality whether she would like it or not, but 19 is not a child, so she should be aware of all the options. I'm assuming that she has a degree of common sense & can keep herself away from the druggy side of KS, which is very behind the scenes anyway (she would literally have to ask around to find anything), we have always stayed in Khao San (near the temple) every time we have had to go to BKK & have met so many nice young people who were just hanging around, drinking soft drinks & watching movies or playing pool. Yeah, it's not a place she should be hanging around everynight but for every once in a while she would probably enjoy it. It also is the place where all young girls, travelling or on a gap year stay & they are mostly travelling in pairs or alone so lots of female company for her.

Griser,

Have you asked your daughter what she would like to do??

She really is looking foward to going!

And is she looking forward to living abroad??

There is a HUGE difference between "looking for new adventures" and "living a new life".

Sorry Boo, I don't spend any time on khao san road if I can help it, living on koh phangan for the past 15 years I am surrounded by backpackers. Not to say there aren't nice ones, or clean ones, of course there are. Most of them are nice, but to be honest, they are here on holiday and she is here to live. Usually they have completely different attitudes towards thailand and thai culture. Also, there are alot of predators out there and it is often the 19 year olds on gap years who get targeted. At home she would probably tend to be more careful but it is easy to let your guard down here and because one feels so "surrounded" by strangeness it feels easier to trust someone who seems familiar. usually these are the ones to be more careful of. and it takes alot more than being 19 to spot the difference.

And supersurch, I would hope griser, his ex, his wife, and his daughter have all sat down and had a serious talk about the ramifications of moving here. She is 19 after all, and I am sure (being american!) if she had really serious misgivings at this point she would let her dad know. And at 19, if she really was against going I am sure she could find a way to stay in the US. Besides, like I said earlier, some exposure to overseas culture at a young age is a good idea, broadens the horizons!

What's the price of attending an international college in Thailand compared with one in the US?

Griser, I think your best bet would be, when you all arrive, you, your wife & daughter spend a few days going around the city & orientating your daughter to the place. Bangkok can be confusing on a first visit & getting her used to the chaos & showing her how to get around will really help her out in the begining. I know some don't agree with me but KS road is ok (I'm there several times a year for a week or more at a time), dirty & smelly with lots of people but I think if she decided to hang around there occasionally the worse you could expect to happen would be that she would take on the dress sense of the backpackers, in which case she will be wearing badly thought out fisherman pant/ thai script coca cola t-shirts combos & plastic flip flops but as a place for her to meet (not necesarly make friends) with other foreigners of all nationalities her own age, it's the only place I know of that have an abundance of them in a very contained area. The police are always posted at either end of the street (I've never seen a fight or trouble) & she would meet people from all over the globe as well as the younger thais who work or hang around there too.

But I'm sure the people she will meet at her school will all be in the same boat (foreigners abroad or western/mixed thais) so I'm sure there she will make plenty of friends without having to resort to the dreaded Khoa San!

I agree with Boo on the orienting tour! Make sure you show her public transport, she needs to be able to learn some thai (at least numbers etc) to feel comfortable, and take her shoppping! I am sure she will find Bangkok a bit overwhelming at first (didn't we all, when we first came?) but after a while will enjoy it (ok, aside from the very nasty pollution issue, bangkok can be fun!). Especially after the shopping trip

The cheaper colleges in the US cost about 11,000 to 15,000 dollars a year. The International college's in bangkok range from about 3000 to 6000 dollars

Greg

Where are you gonna send her to school griser ?

Haven't really made that decision, probably the closest/best one to my house in bangkok. hehe

Greg

Greg

The cheaper colleges in the US cost about 11,000 to 15,000 dollars a year. The International college's in bangkok range from about 3000 to 6000 dollars

I am curious about the cost for international colleges in Bangkok. Did you mean the private ones? And the cost being per semester?

My sister in-law attends ABAC and it is definitely higher than 3,000 -6,000 USD per year.

Anyway, I would recommend that you check the international colleges website. There is an international college Mahidol (Salaya campus) which has dorms and is very quiet and away from the big city of Bangkok. I have seen a lot of farang students there as well. She will certainly make friends there.

I would recommend that you check into entrance requirements, documents needed, and so on. You may also want to check for the fees as well. I suspect they night charge foreign students rates as the US does....

Good luck and I wish you all the best. It is too bad that she couldn't attend a university in the States. The reason I state this is that when my daughter reaches university age I will send her to the States. I do not want her to study here. It is no bad reflection on Thai universities but I want her to develop problem solving skills. An earlier poster stated that students here tend to sit back, remain quiet, and NEVER question their professor. So true!

The best of luck. Sorry for the intrusion ladies.

very good point monitor, and no intrusion, men are welcome, just no bashing! anyway, yes, I did wonder how much they cost, in the US out of state and foreign students are charged quite a bit more than local residents. I would suspect thailand is the same. also, I think it would be more than worthwhile to check out financial aid in the US which is probably not available here, esp for a foreign student. Also, state schools in the US are often very good and usually not that much for state residents. depends on the state you are in, of course!

The cost of Bangkok University - International College is 7,000 - 8,000 USD per annum for a foreign student.

U can check the details from.

www.bu.ac.th

[select the international section and it is called BUIC]

About the standard, I am not sure to comment but definitely below the US standards. It is not that BU or the teachers are not upto the standard. It is about the environment in Thailand. As one said, many students will not question and they simply sit and listen to what the lecturer say.

BU has very good lecturers and they always encourage students to ask questions and make things interactive. Many of them are foreign teachers. I think they know the weakness here and they try to overcome it. This is the case with all other International Uni's in Thailand.

The contents of the Degrees will be not upto the level of a US degree. May be it would be more correct if I say "The level of assessments could be lower to facilitate Thai students, educated in normal Thai high schools".

Another factor to consider is the recognition of the Degrees [whatever the University you select], in US. If she decides to do her Masters one day in US, then it will be a key factor for her to think. In that way, she can catch up the lost opportunity one day.

We have a friend studying in BU. She is a Brit and she is enjoying her time. She too is here, due to similar circumstances like in your daughters case. But she is planning to go back after her B.Sc and to do a Masters in UK, so she can somehow catch up what she lost during last 3 Yrs.

Studying in a Developing Country, with a different culture, religion will certainly help her.

It was rather thoughtful of the OP to seek advice here for his daughter. I wonder how things turned out for the daughter. Did she enroll into a Thai school and stay long enough to complete her degree? Was it a challenge to acclimate culturally? I'd be interested to know.

He's still active on the forum after all these years, why not send him a PM to ask? I doubt he will check back on what is now an 8 year old thread.

I did notice that this was quite an old thread, but it reminded me of an article I read in last weeks Economist that might have some good info for folks in Thailand who have or will soon have college bound kids. In Johor, Malaysia, at the encouragement of the Malaysian government, a number of British, American and Australian universities have or will be opening campuses there. It seems that classes are in English and they claim that students will get the same degrees and qualifications as their western counterparts at "half the price." The Economist says that these schools are supposedly not a partnership with an established asian university or these western schools lending their names out to a university a la in Singapore or HK, but actually "replicas of themselves in another country." I don't know if their claims are true or not, but it might be worth investigating for some of you. If your going to do a search the place is also called Educity.

Some Aussie unis tried opening in Thailand too

But can't think of one that still maintains a successful campus.

Some are in Malaysia, but also opening up in Vietnam

I don't understand the "my Farang Daughter" bit...

why not just say, my daughter who is american..?

Some Aussie unis tried opening in Thailand too

But can't think of one that still maintains a successful campus.

Some are in Malaysia, but also opening up in Vietnam

Monash springs to mind in Malaysia.

Don't worry she will most likely be fine. A lot will depend on her reaction also.

If she is going to an international school with a number of non Thai students that is where she make her first contact with living in Bangkok. The other non Thai students will probably let her into their group. and from there she will start to meet Thai friends from the school...including Thais.

The Thai students in most international schools here in Bangkok are usually from well off Thai families who can afford the cost of the school, not poor Thai families. Many of them are quite used to a more "farang" (foriegn) life style already. Especially with Thai teenagers (I have a 16 year old Thai grand daughter) they actively seek a "western" lifestyle as "cool" And in the international schools most of the girls will have a reasonable nglish level. Many of the classes are given in English, or English is often used in class anyhow.

My Thai wife's son's girlfriend (if you followed that) is going to a university in Bangkok, and studying to be a Legal Secretary (a secretary for a Lawyer) At least half her classes are in English as well as most of the textbooks. Your daughter should do fine in Bangkok...some things will seem strange at first. but a lot of things will be familiar from the states. (i.e. McDonalds is everywhere in Bangkok already).

Some points however:

1. A lot of the boys at her school are going to be already well into the "cars and girlfriends" stage. They have money because they are from well-off families. Your daughter being a foriegner will be a big attraction..she's "exotic". If she is only halfway good looking she is going to be of interest to them. Being 19 already, I guess she knows how to handle that problem by now.

2. From what I've seen the "Drugs" problem here in Bangkok is not as bad as in the U.S. Sure the drugs are here, but it is not as bad as the U.S., no matter what you hear on the news. Of course, she should stay away from that nonsense.

3. Thai girls, like teen-agers everywhere, have groups of "best friends" they spend much of their free time with. If your daughter makes a friend in one of these groups, she will be accepted as a "best friend" by the whole group.

Posted 2003-12-01 06:56:09

First i'd like to apologize to the ladies on this board for this male intrusion.

Having said that, I'd like to ask the ladies here a question about my 19 year old daughter. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I would guess She is 26 or 27 years old now and most likely had a wonderful when she stayed stayed in Thailand.

Edited May 20, 201115 yr by mike123ca