Mother Of Girl Involved In Bangkok Tollway Accident Attends Funeral Of Victim

[webfact]

Mother of girl involved in accident attends funeral of victim

By THE NATION ON SUNDAY

The mother of the teenaged girl involved in the recent fatal tollway crash yesterday offered an emotional apology to the family of a victim.

Laddawan Dhephasdin na Ayudhya went to Ratchaburi province to attend the funeral of Dr Sastra Chaothiang, a researcher at the National Science and Technology Development Agency who was among the nine passengers of a van killed in the accident on Monday.

Laddawan prostrated herself at the feet of Sastra's adoptive mother, Thawin Chaothiang, 62, three times while apologising with teary eyes. She also gave a token compensation of Bt30,000 to her. Other members of the victim's family were also present at the temple where his funeral was being held. Laddawan said she offered her apology on behalf of her 17-year-old daughter, who was still being treated at hospital and was suffering from widespread social condemnation.

Thawin responded that nobody wanted the accident to take place and she was ready to offer an apology. "I am sorry for losing my son who was a good man. You still have your child who joins you for dinner, but I no longer have any," she said.

The girl's family has visited the injured victims and the families of six of the nine dead victims to offer their regret. They were arranging for meetings with families of the three remaining dead victims.

In a related development, police said the under-aged driver had acknowledged in writing a police summons to hear formal charges against her and had promised to meet investigators on Wednesday.

Police said they would charge the girl with reckless driving causing deaths. She would then be sent to a juvenile observation and protection centre, and if her parents or relatives wanted to seek bail for her, they had to contact the centre themselves.

Police added that since she was an under-aged driver, police were investigating if her parents had allowed her to drive and should face charges or not.

-- The Nation 2011-01-02

[Credo]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

[rhino533]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

Come on, I personally think it’s all an act. She’s just trying to save the family name and 30,000B compensation what a joke. I really do hope this underage teen driver gets what should be coming to her but I highly doubt she’ll get in any trouble. Imagine if that was one of you Sons or Daughters who died in such a way and some lady was offering 30,000B compensation. I would through it back in her face.

[sirchai]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

There're 30,000 reasons that there's no glimmer of hope at all................:jap:

[Nisa]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

Agree. The family and the girl appear to be doing the right things and what they reasonably can at this point. So, far everything I have seen indicates this is a good family with a daughter who used very bad judgement resulting in horrific consequences..

Edited January 2, 2011 by Nisa

[reason1]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

I am with you; I hope too that wounds from this senseless needless tragedy will heal in time and the folks recover something

[neverdie]

I get the feeling that theres more to this 'story' than meets the eye, based on what is suggested in this article.

I can see the mother seems to show some genuine remorse for what has happened & perhaps theres more than one reason for that.

I think its harsh to judge her or the family based on the 30,000 baht for a couple of reasons. Firstly, thats what happens here, people pay money to each other when someone is killed/injured, secondly, it already seems that the family has fairly quickly started to fork out money here and there & not everyone has the ability to access funds at such short notice, especially when it has to be distrubted so far and so wide. Everyone seems to assume that because of the family name that they must have a money printing press in their back pockets.

It would appear this this process is taking the correct course & thats encouraging to see.

[ChiangMaiFun]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

Agree. The family and the girl appear to be doing the right things and what they reasonably can at this point. So, far everything I have seen indicates this is a good family with a daughter who used very bad judgement resulting in horrific consequences..

The daughter is young and stupid and will make, we all make, stupid decisions - it's the parents I largely condemn - they knew she was driving, they knew she was underage, they were arrogant and did NOTHING

[GuyLee]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

There're 30,000 reasons that there's no glimmer of hope at all................:jap:

Said story, but when you see Police stopping traffic at schools to let the children leave the school riding a motorbike under aged, no license, no helmet, three or more on the bike and the motorbike that is clearly not road worthy i.e. no lights no registration plates etc. Why would this girl see it as wrong to drive she has ample example to do so!

[ChiangMaiFun]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

There're 30,000 reasons that there's no glimmer of hope at all................:jap:

Said story, but when you see Police stopping traffic at schools to let the children leave the school riding a motorbike under aged, no license, no helmet, three or more on the bike and the motorbike that is clearly not road worthy i.e. no lights no registration plates etc. Why would this girl see it as wrong to drive she has ample example to do so!

agreed but parents are responsible for their daughters until they reach 18+ her parents will have known and rather than just saying 'our daughter is so sorry etc.' what about 'we failed our daughter too - we knew she was underage' and instead of 'mai bpen rai' DO something to to stop her. As for 30,000 I know what I would do with the money if I were offered that for my son and the parents would have to go to hospital to extract it.

[Nisa]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

There're 30,000 reasons that there's no glimmer of hope at all................:jap:

Said story, but when you see Police stopping traffic at schools to let the children leave the school riding a motorbike under aged, no license, no helmet, three or more on the bike and the motorbike that is clearly not road worthy i.e. no lights no registration plates etc. Why would this girl see it as wrong to drive she has ample example to do so!

agreed but parents are responsible for their daughters until they reach 18+ her parents will have known and rather than just saying 'our daughter is so sorry etc.' what about 'we failed our daughter too - we knew she was underage' and instead of 'mai bpen rai' DO something to to stop her. As for 30,000 I know what I would do with the money if I were offered that for my son and the parents would have to go to hospital to extract it.

"token compensation" is not full compensation or even meant as compensation but as what it says .. a "token" gesture less than a week after the crash. Lets not turn a good gesture into a bad one .. none of the families have yet rejected these token offerings and their opinions certainly weigh more than ours.

There is nothing yet to indicate the parents knew she was driving and in fact the mother denied they knew and believed used words to the effect of being shocked. It has been reported this was a friends car. The police have said they are looking into both things.

[DLock]

Pay a little money and prostrate at the feet of the Mother of the child your Daughter killed?

Yeah, that makes everything better.

"I am sorry for losing my son who was a good man. You still have your child who joins you for dinner, but I no longer have any," she said."

Send a signal.

[Nisa]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

Come on, I personally think it's all an act. She's just trying to save the family name and 30,000B compensation what a joke. I really do hope this underage teen driver gets what should be coming to her but I highly doubt she'll get in any trouble. Imagine if that was one of you Sons or Daughters who died in such a way and some lady was offering 30,000B compensation. I would through it back in her face.

You are certainly entitled to your own opinion but it shocks my senses that you think so little of your fellow humans to believe this woman doesn't feel awful about the deaths of 9-people who her daughter appears to have been at least largely responsible for. But more shocking is why you appear to want to believe this rather than the logical as this women is losing face big time by doing what she is doing and the article clearly states the offering was "token compensation" and the family member took it ... again, I would put a lot more credibility and care into the victim's family and what the believe than a poster here who seems hell bent on believing the worst in people.

[ChiangMaiFun]

"token compensation" is not full compensation or even meant as compensation but as what it says .. a "token" gesture less than a week after the crash. Lets not turn a good gesture into a bad one .. none of the families have yet rejected these token offerings and their opinions certainly weigh more than ours.

There is nothing yet to indicate the parents knew she was driving and in fact the mother denied they knew and believed used words to the effect of being shocked. It has been reported this was a friends car. The police have said they are looking into both things.

My point is... the parents 'should' have know where there 16 year old was - my problem is the Thai's lack of responsibility - for just about anything from driving to animal welfare to their kids.

In this case the answer 'I didn't know'

[neverdie]

"I am sorry for losing my son who was a good man. You still have your child who joins you for dinner, but I no longer have any," she said."

Send a signal.

Certainly does & it is a very fair comment.

Since others are so quick to pull 'poor offender' card & look for excuses on how much everything else is to blame, HERE we have a poor innocent victim (A victims mother). Just stop and take a look at that poor woman, she's lost her only son & is now left with nothing. Now there is someone that gets my deepest sympathy.

Edited January 2, 2011 by neverdie

[jayboy]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

Agree. The family and the girl appear to be doing the right things and what they reasonably can at this point. So, far everything I have seen indicates this is a good family with a daughter who used very bad judgement resulting in horrific consequences..

And if found guilty should be punished accordingly.Agreed?

[Credo]

Make no mistake, I don't believe this makes everything OK, because it doesn't. It simply shows one mother reaching out to another. She has some realization of the pain that has been caused by her own daughter. Her efforts are probably meant to protect her daughter as well.

The family could have sent someone on their behalf. They didn't. Somewhere in the convoluted situation, we have someone who is acknowledging some responsibility. 30,000 baht is just a token. It will help pay for the funeral and some food for those involved.

Plenty of people in the past have taken no responsibility. It's a small step, but a step in the right direction.

[Nisa]

I see a glimmer of hope for the young lady who caused the accident. She has a mother who has a lot of courage and a fair amount of compassion.

Agree. The family and the girl appear to be doing the right things and what they reasonably can at this point. So, far everything I have seen indicates this is a good family with a daughter who used very bad judgement resulting in horrific consequences..

And if found guilty should be punished accordingly.Agreed?

Never have I indicated anything differently. She should be treated as any other minor involved in this situation regardless of her last name.

[ChiangMaiFun]

Make no mistake, I don't believe this makes everything OK, because it doesn't. It simply shows one mother reaching out to another. She has some realization of the pain that has been caused by her own daughter. Her efforts are probably meant to protect her daughter as well.

The family could have sent someone on their behalf. They didn't. Somewhere in the convoluted situation, we have someone who is acknowledging some responsibility. 30,000 baht is just a token. It will help pay for the funeral and some food for those involved.

Plenty of people in the past have taken no responsibility. It's a small step, but a step in the right direction.

It would have been more impressive if the family had turned up - maybe even the daughter - and where is the Father? and BTW any Thai funeral I have ever been to was 100k minimum

[Nisa]

"token compensation" is not full compensation or even meant as compensation but as what it says .. a "token" gesture less than a week after the crash. Lets not turn a good gesture into a bad one .. none of the families have yet rejected these token offerings and their opinions certainly weigh more than ours.

There is nothing yet to indicate the parents knew she was driving and in fact the mother denied they knew and believed used words to the effect of being shocked. It has been reported this was a friends car. The police have said they are looking into both things.

My point is... the parents 'should' have know where there 16 year old was - my problem is the Thai's lack of responsibility - for just about anything from driving to animal welfare to their kids.

In this case the answer 'I didn't know'

I don't think this is a Thai only issue. Parents all over the world don't know where their 16-year olds are once they leave the house. I will reserve my judgement about the parents blame in this until more facts come out but do believe the family has been doing the best they can to address this tragic event and there is not more we can ask for at this point (less than a week after the accident).

[ChiangMaiFun]

"token compensation" is not full compensation or even meant as compensation but as what it says .. a "token" gesture less than a week after the crash. Lets not turn a good gesture into a bad one .. none of the families have yet rejected these token offerings and their opinions certainly weigh more than ours.

There is nothing yet to indicate the parents knew she was driving and in fact the mother denied they knew and believed used words to the effect of being shocked. It has been reported this was a friends car. The police have said they are looking into both things.

My point is... the parents 'should' have know where there 16 year old was - my problem is the Thai's lack of responsibility - for just about anything from driving to animal welfare to their kids.

In this case the answer 'I didn't know'

I don't think this is a Thai only issue. Parents all over the world don't know where their 16-year olds are once they leave the house. I will reserve my judgement about the parents blame in this until more facts come out but do believe the family has been doing the best they can to address this tragic event and there is not more we can ask for at this point (less than a week after the accident).

well, I agree, it's an international problem - but Thai's have created an artform of lack of responsibility in my view. In this case at least the Mother did something which I acknowledge but i fear more for the wider cultural 'mai mben rai' culture that allows 16 year olds to race around texting on their BBs then not turning up for a Police interview? and where is the girl now? in custody? oh no... she's 'recuperating' somewhere

[Cuchulainn]

Personally, I also think that the mother is deeply sorry for her daughter's actions and wants to make amends as much as she can. It is brave of her to attend the funeral(s) of the victims and to offer a 'token' gift as a sign of her sorrow and regret.

However, if this accident hadn't caused so much of an outcry and was accepted as another daily statistic, would she have attended the funeral(s) and given the 'token'?

No matter what, the girl should be charged to the full extent of the law as well as her parents, but I doubt it.

Moo Ham: Out on bail

Duangchalerm: No witnesses

Santika Pub Owners: Nothing so far

yawn

[tigerbalm]

"I am sorry for losing my son who was a good man. You still have your child who joins you for dinner, but I no longer have any," she said."

Send a signal.

Certainly does & it is a very fair comment.

Since others are so quick to pull 'poor offender' card & look for excuses on how much everything else is to blame, HERE we have a poor innocent victim (A victims mother). Just stop and take a look at that poor woman, she's lost her only son & is now left with nothing. Now there is someone that gets my deepest sympathy.

Could not agree more with these two comments, my thoughts and deepest sympathies go out to the victims and their parents...Tragic

[Nisa]

Make no mistake, I don't believe this makes everything OK, because it doesn't. It simply shows one mother reaching out to another. She has some realization of the pain that has been caused by her own daughter. Her efforts are probably meant to protect her daughter as well.

The family could have sent someone on their behalf. They didn't. Somewhere in the convoluted situation, we have someone who is acknowledging some responsibility. 30,000 baht is just a token. It will help pay for the funeral and some food for those involved.

Plenty of people in the past have taken no responsibility. It's a small step, but a step in the right direction.

It would have been more impressive if the family had turned up - maybe even the daughter - and where is the Father? and BTW any Thai funeral I have ever been to was 100k minimum

I have been wonder about the father too but am not going to pass judgement at this point not knowing the facts especially given about three other members of the family (brother, uncle and aunt) have all been involved positively. For all I know the father may be suffering some health issues that prevent his being involved or the media is just not mentioning him since the mother appears to be acting as the family lead and spokesperson.

The girl is still hospitalized and has received a number of threats but she did meet with with 5 of the families and/or victims at one hospital already (3 or 4 -days after the accident). She also stated she wants to attend the funerals of all those who died .. however that is probably not possible given the publicity and threats against her life. At least two of the 5 families said they accepted her apologies and there was no reports of any family refusing to meet with them or not taking the token offerings. So, again I am going to give much more credibility to these victims and their families than posters here regarding her and her family's sincerity.

Edited January 2, 2011 by Nisa

[onnut]

I get the feeling that theres more to this 'story' than meets the eye, based on what is suggested in this article.

I can see the mother seems to show some genuine remorse for what has happened & perhaps theres more than one reason for that.

I think its harsh to judge her or the family based on the 30,000 baht for a couple of reasons. Firstly, thats what happens here, people pay money to each other when someone is killed/injured, secondly, it already seems that the family has fairly quickly started to fork out money here and there & not everyone has the ability to access funds at such short notice, especially when it has to be distrubted so far and so wide. Everyone seems to assume that because of the family name that they must have a money printing press in their back pockets.

It would appear this this process is taking the correct course & thats encouraging to see.

ND, I agree with what you say here. I was thinking yesterday that if the family were so wealthy and being Thai, they wouldn't be in a Civic would they!

They may be up there but probably most of there funds are tied up in land buildings or stocks and shares.

Anyway, rich or poor, it's nice to see she had the guts to go to a funeral.

It would be nice if Thailand can learn from this, but I do strongly doubt it.

[ChiangMaiFun]

Make no mistake, I don't believe this makes everything OK, because it doesn't. It simply shows one mother reaching out to another. She has some realization of the pain that has been caused by her own daughter. Her efforts are probably meant to protect her daughter as well.

The family could have sent someone on their behalf. They didn't. Somewhere in the convoluted situation, we have someone who is acknowledging some responsibility. 30,000 baht is just a token. It will help pay for the funeral and some food for those involved.

Plenty of people in the past have taken no responsibility. It's a small step, but a step in the right direction.

It would have been more impressive if the family had turned up - maybe even the daughter - and where is the Father? and BTW any Thai funeral I have ever been to was 100k minimum

I have been wonder about the father too but am not going to pass judgement at this point not knowing the facts especially given about three other members of the family (brother, uncle and aunt) have all been involved positively. For all I know the father may be suffering some health issues that prevent his being involved or the media is just not mentioning him since the mother appears to be acting as the family lead and spokesperson.

The girl is still hospitalized and has received a number of threats but she did meet with with 5 of the families and/or victims at one hospital already (3 or 4 -days after the accident). She also stated she wants to attend the funerals of all those who died .. however that is probably not possible given the publicity and threats against her life. At least two of the 5 families said they accepted her apologies and there was no reports of any family refusing to meet with them or not taking the token offerings. So, again I am going to give much more credibility to these victims and their families than posters here regarding her and her family's sincerity.

without appearing overly cynical it's 'deferrential' the family's would not dream of saying 'don't come to the funeral' because the family were their 'betters' - my whole attention and sympathy is with the victims - no one else

[rixalex]

It would have been more impressive if the family had turned up - maybe even the daughter - and where is the Father? and BTW any Thai funeral I have ever been to was 100k minimum

Indeed. Shouldn't the token amount have at least taken care of funeral expenses?

[GuyLee]

"token compensation" is not full compensation or even meant as compensation but as what it says .. a "token" gesture less than a week after the crash. Lets not turn a good gesture into a bad one .. none of the families have yet rejected these token offerings and their opinions certainly weigh more than ours.

There is nothing yet to indicate the parents knew she was driving and in fact the mother denied they knew and believed used words to the effect of being shocked. It has been reported this was a friends car. The police have said they are looking into both things.

My point is... the parents 'should' have know where there 16 year old was - my problem is the Thai's lack of responsibility - for just about anything from driving to animal welfare to their kids.

In this case the answer 'I didn't know'

I don't think this is a Thai only issue. Parents all over the world don't know where their 16-year olds are once they leave the house. I will reserve my judgement about the parents blame in this until more facts come out but do believe the family has been doing the best they can to address this tragic event and there is not more we can ask for at this point (less than a week after the accident).

It is not a Thai only problem some time ago schools were being vandalized in NSW Australia and get the parents was an initial response. But then the reality of the parents were not allowed to discipline the children "you now can not hit the child, can not lock the sh-t in there room etc". The girl should face the full consequences of her actions and if the parents did let her drive then they must face this. But all need to take responsibility for what has happened starting with the Police, schools and parents.

[onnut]

These are Thais, and they do things different from most of us. If 30k token makes them feel better along with an apology then that's how it is. It is very nice and a change to see then the normal running away from there mess.

We have had idiots in the UK driving underage and killing somebody, the law deals with them though. In the eyes of the law here, she has driven without a license and was under age. Plus the reckless driving bit which is just a fine. The family then have to negotiate to pay the victims families off! It's Thai, it seems to work for them.

For the record, if somebody offered me 30 million baht as an offer for my son, they would still get it shoved up there never regions.

[stevecm]

"I am sorry for losing my son who was a good man. You still have your child who joins you for dinner, but I no longer have any," she said."

Send a signal.

Certainly does & it is a very fair comment.

Since others are so quick to pull 'poor offender' card & look for excuses on how much everything else is to blame, HERE we have a poor innocent victim (A victims mother). Just stop and take a look at that poor woman, she's lost her only son & is now left with nothing. Now there is someone that gets my deepest sympathy.

Couldn't agree more. All this saying sorry and loosing face doesn't change the reality. I really do feel for the victims family's, lets not confuse the victims with the perpetrators. Many family's have been deeply hurt and affected forever and no sum of money is going to fix that. My thoughts are with this poor women and the rest of the victims.