Crazy/Funny/Stupid Lies Thai Salespeople Tell To Make A Sale?

[Jingthing]

OK, this thread was inspired by an encounter I had the other night with a Thai clothing vendor. This was a cart operation and not a good place to try on the pants I was shopping for. So I asked for my size in inches (as the pants are sized here) and she came up with an item bearing the correct size number. But experience has shown me never to trust the printed sizes here. So I measured them with a tape measure and sure enough they were 2" smaller. I wanted to buy the shorts but they wouldn't fit, so that was it. Then the fun begins. The saleslady still tries to push the shorts, with two hilarious ploys

-- She shows me how she measures the shorts, with 2" starting out in the blank space before the garment begins. She then says "This is how we measure in Thailand" (how that was going to make the shorts magically fit me she didn't address)

When that didn't work she then tries

-- In Thailand we use centimeters (staring at shorts clearly marked in INCHES)

(BTW, as a general rule in Thailand, DO NOT trust the printed sizes.)

I found the blank space measurement quite entertaining, so starting this thread to solicit other possibly amusing true life stories on this topic --

Crazy/funny/stupid lies Thai salespeople tell to make a sale?

Edited April 4, 2011 by Jingthing

[JusMe]

Of course you can return it if it doesn't fit or work as intended.

[Jingthing]

Of course you can return it if it doesn't fit or work as intended.

Well sometimes you can if they have stock of your size for clothes. I recently had success with that with a small vendor. However, if they don't have stock of your size, I would say very hard to get cash back.

[Jebhead]

It comes with lifetime warranty.....yeah, right!

JH

[Boater]

you go out shopping with a tape measure

[Samuian]

never forget that sizes - even "unisizes" like s, m, l, xl on local markets, shops etc. are manufactured according to the general physique, measurements of the locals!

[slapout]

I like the vendors selling fruit, etc, out of the back of a pickup truck along the various highways leading to CM. The conversation goes something like this.

I want ripe sweet watermelon, all are sweet and ripe

For sure, yes, no problem, this good one, if not bring back

You guarantee, yes sir

Lets cut open just to make sure i don't have to bring back, so sorry no knife today

I have knife in my pocket you cut , ok, no problem

Its not red but more white its not ripe, no problem you pay me for this one and I pick another one for you

how much for this one, same price sir.

[BngkkB]

I went into a bank I had recently opened an account at to pick up my ATM card I had ordered with my name printed on it.

When I looked at the card they had my full first name and full middle name but only half of my last name. I pointed this out the customer service agent.

His Reply: "That is perfectly alright sir, the last name is not important in Thailand, only the first middle name"

I said: "I got this card to use on the Internet"

His Answer: "Last name is not needed when purchasing on the Internet"

I said: "What about buying an airline ticket online?"

He said: "You don't need to give name to airline when buying ticket"

At this point I asked him if he could just change it for me using only my middle initial instead of my whole middle name?

He informed me that that was illegal to do in Thailand. Knowing that this was going no place, I thanked him for his time and left. I went back the next day when the lady that opened my account was there, showed her the card with missing letters in the last name and she corrected it at once, replacing my middle name with my middle initial only. When I told her what had happened with the young man she said, "Yes I believe it, most of the young people don't bother to learn the proper way to do things or do they care about it".

[p_brownstone]

Some years ago we were having a Fitted Kitchen installed.

I specifically told the Designer that only 1 thing was fixed and essential – that the Cooking Hob must be in a certain place, the only part of the one wall in the kitchen which had no other rooms behind it, so the exhaust from the Hood could vent into the outside air.

Sure enough when the first Drawing was supplied the Hob and Hood were on the opposite side of the room, the other side of the wall there was the Dining Room.

I patiently pointed this out and the “Designer” said “no problem” - he would run a 6” x 6” x 23 foot tunnel from the Hob vent, running through all the fitted cupboards of course, to the wall I had originally specified, and out into the open air.

Patrick

[Thaddeus]

She shows me how she measures the shorts, with 2" starting out in the blank space before the garment begins.

Is that where your cock goes?

[kunjet]

it hasn't happened in a while, but there was a period last year where almost every time i ordered a bottle of red (johnnie walker) at a club i got a bottle of black, and the server would uncap it immediately and when i pointed out that it was a bottle of black he would say, sorry, but i can not take it back now that it is open or my manager will be really mad at me if you send it back or they will deduct it from my salary if you send it back...

earlier this year there was a period of about two weeks when it seemed that every taxi ride i took, the driver did something wrong and it always cost me: like when going to RCA from where i live on phetchaburi road, the driver would speed past the small soi that connects to RCA and then say, oh, i am sorry, i passed the entrance, which required a really long loop around different sets of roads to get back to the same spot or required going up to Pra Ram 9 to enter RCA from there, which is exactly what i tell them not to do when i get in the cab since it is must shorter and faster to go through the back entrance...

[zzaa09]

Of course you can return it if it doesn't fit or work as intended.

You can, in many instances. Depending on the locale and situation. As everything is not the same......

[Jingthing]

This is more of the "funny" variety.

Shopping for luggage at a shophouse luggage shop selling non-name brand merchandise.

The first salesman is trying hard but he is very tired. During ten minutes talking to him he literally nods off three times. Still I was communicating with him OK, and making jokes like this must be a boring job.

Anyway, he just vanishes without warning and nowhere to be seen and is replaced by a very silly teenage girl with no English.

There is one item I am very interested in and it is their only one of that model. So I touch it firmly to get some idea of it's build quality. Then the fun really begins. The silly girl starts PUNCHING it very hard and then sits on it. How often would that happen in the west? While I appreciate people might want to see a demo or video of an elephant stepping on some item you wanted to buy and see it not breaking, but this was the SPECIFIC item I was considering, and she was abusing it. She clearly had no concept that might not be a good thing.

Edited April 28, 2011 by Jingthing

[MaiChai]

The Benmore lady trying to con me that Benmore is still 5 year whisky when it isn't. Guess 5 year is more expensive than normal 3 year, so Benmore gave up on the 5yr as the Thais don't know (appreciate/care) the difference. What makes me laugh is that they blatantly lie to get you to buy whatever it is! It you ask them anything about the product they will agree that the product does whatever you asked!

Then there is the promo girls trying to steer you away from what you want to what they are selling! Its very difficult telling them you don't want whatever she is selling and you can choose your own products!

The gf does alot of promo work; lets just say Thais are easy to sell to...

I don't buy good quality luggage anymore. A couple of trips and the airlines have bashed, scratched and ripped it. Thus save your money and buy cheap luggage.

Edited May 3, 2011 by MaiChai

[CanInBKK]

A few months back I was looking at Bluetooth headsets for my phone. I picked up two nearly identical looking units, both were the one-piece in ear type except one was a name brand and the other wasn't - the price difference was nearly double. I asked the salesperson why the difference in price, she pointed to the expensive one and said "this one is stereo"! Wow, why didn't she just reply Dolby 5.1 while we are already on the topic of spewing nonsense???