folium Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 You are all probably well aware that at 6pm local time (everywhere on Earth, like some Mexican wave) on Saturday 21 May 2011, rapture will occur and the righteous will be beamed up to heaven. God will then destroy the Earth and entire universe on October 21st 2011. So you can stop fretting about earthquakes in Chiang Mai, this is far more worrying. Who will be gone at 6pm tomorrow, who will still be here (apart from sexpat Taksinophobes), and what do we do between then and October 21? PS. Thank you Harold Camping (shame about September 1994, better luck this time). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WinnieTheKhwai Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 (edited) XKCD.com : Edited May 20, 2011 by WinnieTheKhwai Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onionluke Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 I was blissfully unaware . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mallmagician Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 What an idiot, I've just paid to have my air con serviced, and insurance on the car. Should have waited. I'll feel a right fool if I'm beamed to heaven, and if in left behind and destroyed tomorrow, then it will have been a waste of money too. You're damned if u do, and damned if u dont! Ahem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrclough Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Maybe Chiang Mai FC will get a win tomorrow then. Where exactly does this leave the people that don't have heaven and hell in their religions then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaddeus Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Yay...... no more 90 reporting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doggie888888 Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Maybe Chiang Mai FC will get a win tomorrow then. Where exactly does this leave the people that don't have heaven and hell in their religions then? With their feet firmly planted on Planet Earth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lannarebirth Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 The bars will still be open though, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KRS1 Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 it would be seriously disturbing if it really happened.....but nah, i dont think so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
folium Posted May 20, 2011 Author Share Posted May 20, 2011 What an idiot, I've just paid to have my air con serviced, and insurance on the car. Should have waited. I'll feel a right fool if I'm beamed to heaven, and if in left behind and destroyed tomorrow, then it will have been a waste of money too. You're damned if u do, and damned if u dont! Ahem. Relax. If you don't get the ticket to heaven you've still got 5 months to get the most out of your ac and car, and then we all die. So it's not all bad news! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
folium Posted May 20, 2011 Author Share Posted May 20, 2011 Maybe Chiang Mai FC will get a win tomorrow then. Where exactly does this leave the people that don't have heaven and hell in their religions then? Re the football; could be interesting if either team has any righteous Christian players and they are on the pitch at 6pm. What would the ref do about that? No heaven or hell in your belief? Looks like you are in the mix with the "sexpat Taksinophobes", and you better start counting down the days to Oct 21. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weary Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Just use lube and you should be ok. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priceless Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Maybe Chiang Mai FC will get a win tomorrow then. Where exactly does this leave the people that don't have heaven and hell in their religions then? I'm sure that you can find your answer here: http://www.venganza.org/ / Priceless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozzieovaseas Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Im glad you told me this..id better start packing Do you think they will let me take a 5 litre drum of Bundaberg rum?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pillion Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 This Rapture business could be a load of rubbish. There is one thing concerning me though. On the off chance that this does happen, is it possible to get there on the back of a motorbike? I'll get a lift there, sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heybruce Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 (edited) Since it happens 6 p.m. everywhere, we will be raptured several hours before Europe, and a half day ahead of the Americas. That should give us a good head start on apartment hunting in heaven, or wherever we end up. Oh wait, I just remembered, the most populous parts of China will get there ahead of us. Oh boy, the lines at Immigration will take forever, but I guess we'll have time. Edited May 20, 2011 by heybruce Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jez56 Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Since it happens 6 p.m. everywhere, we will be raptured several hours before Europe, and a half day ahead of the Americas. That should give us a good head start on apartment hunting in heaven, or wherever we end up. Oh wait, I just remembered, the most populous parts of China will get there ahead of us. Oh boy, the lines at Immigration will take forever, but I guess we'll have time. Yeah, but you'll be in rapture, won't you? A billion Chinese in the immigration queue ahead of you will cause not the slightest furrow to crease your brow. I really hope it happens. I can't remember the last time I was in rapture. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uptheos Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Is there no depth low enough, that these evil religious prophetic loons will sink to in order to scare the shit out of gullible people.......especially children? I suppose after it doesn't happen and it won't, it will be because the all loving almighty decided to postpone it for a while. If it does happen, please feel free to tell me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricardo Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 I once almost raptured myself, picking up a heavy box, but now I wear a truss, so "I'm alright Jack" ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doppa Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 why hasnt there been anyone moaning on here' whats this got do with chiangmai'......wait for it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uptheos Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 why hasnt there been anyone moaning on here' whats this got do with chiangmai'......wait for it! Are you are referring to the Chiang Mai 'centre of the universe police squad' who believe they are already in paradise and nowhere else exists? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dellboy218 Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 why hasnt there been anyone moaning on here' whats this got do with chiangmai'......wait for it! Well, if anyone feels like it, they could leave all their money to me before the world expires which would then be deposited in a CHIANG MAI bank! The Daily Mail says it all ends at 6pm but they didnt say whether that was GMT or not! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ulysses G. Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 The Rapture only happens to good Christians. I would guess that almost no expats in Chiang Mai will vanish and we will not even know that it happened. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patronus Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Where will we be beamed up from and do we need a 'portkey' like in Harry Potter ? Is it happening Thai time, or GMT ? Do I need to pack anything ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uptheos Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 The Rapture only happens to good Christians. I would guess that almost no expats in Chiang Mai will vanish and we will not even know that it happened. That's going to be a face loser at church. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
folium Posted May 20, 2011 Author Share Posted May 20, 2011 Where will we be beamed up from and do we need a 'portkey' like in Harry Potter ? Is it happening Thai time, or GMT ? Do I need to pack anything ? The rapture is due to happen at 6pm local time wherever you are in the world, a sort of righteous Mexican wave effect as all the true believers are beamed up to heaven. It would be one heck of a queue if they all transported in one lift. What's it got to do with Chiang Mai? Well if this is the "hub for missionaries" that people like to claim, it looks like there will be lots of vacant properties in World Club Land come 6.01pm tomorrow and one empty school in that area come Monday morning. Re the packing question; for lordy's sake you are going to heaven (if you make the grade) where everything is on the house. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rasseru Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 If any would-be enraptured forum members out there would like to make an open and strong expression of their faith, whether or not with a view to improving their chances of leaving tomorrow for heavenly bliss rather than in five more months in much less pleasant and happy circumstances and for a more hellish future, I wold be willing to accept from you now irrevocable, legally binding pledges of all your assets to be effective from and after October 21st, 2011. :jap: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
folium Posted May 20, 2011 Author Share Posted May 20, 2011 Here's the latest update from the BBC on this life changing, uplifting event due tomorrow: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-13468131 and the prize of the century (until Oct 21 2011 obviously) goes to Bart from New Hampshire; "An atheist and entrepreneur from New Hampshire, Bart Centre, is enjoying a boost in business for Eternal Earth-bound Pets, which he set up to look after the pets of those who believe they will be raptured. He has more than 250 clients who are paying up to $135 to have their pets picked up and cared for after the rapture. They will be disappointed twice, he told the Wall Street Journal. "Once because they weren't raptured and again because I don't do refunds." Good on you Bart, capitalism in action. " A fool and their money are soon parted". Amen to that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mestizo Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 why hasnt there been anyone moaning on here' whats this got do with chiangmai'......wait for it! Not to mention the repeated racist comments about Mexicans. And the insinuation that those opposed to the corrupt criminal Thaksin must be "sexpat Taksinophobes". Nice troll OP, nice troll. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
folium Posted May 20, 2011 Author Share Posted May 20, 2011 why hasnt there been anyone moaning on here' whats this got do with chiangmai'......wait for it! Not to mention the repeated racist comments about Mexicans. And the insinuation that those opposed to the corrupt criminal Thaksin must be "sexpat Taksinophobes". Nice troll OP, nice troll. Oh dear. Nice try. Show me/us one, let alone "repeated racist comments"; and as for insinuations, nice trolling yourself. Can't see you being raptured tomorrow, sweety. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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