Is It Normal? ...an englishman, T g/f, money...

[Braccobaldo]

Ok..i just want share with us what's happening....

I live upcountry, about nine months ago an englishman (about 65 y/o, not friendly)went to live not far from my home with his thai (really ugly) girlfriend.

Just after one month he bought a second-hand car....one more month and he started to built a very very big home (I think not less than 3 million Bath) on a land that belongs to Thailand (family of lady just pay the rent for it), not sure the englishman knows....

Two more months and lady had a new thai boyfriend and she bought to him a shop..(in absence of falan).

Shortly after this falan sell the second-hand car and buy a new one...

...than buy a relatively small home for her family....

...than gives out the car to her family and buy a new one...

...now lady has another thai boyfriend...

...and also she buy a lot of land...

Needless to say she became a sort of "hero" for the locals here....everybody pay she respect 'cause now she can have everything needed...

...and the englishman is considered very very "good man" that "love her lady for sure"...

....ahhh, Thai way of thinking....

...I really would like to read your comments on it....

[pnustedt]

It's really nobody's business what Falang does with his money

[Ken]

..........................Needless to say she became a sort of "hero" for the locals here....everybody pay she respect 'cause now she can have everything needed...

...and the englishman is considered very very "good man" that "love her lady for sure"...

....ahhh, Thai way of thinking....

...I really would like to read your comments on it....

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Ummmm...well actually I suspect the locals are really saying "what a stupid Farang".

What you describe does happen on occasion I think, sad yea, but true. In fact not far from me.....by the way do you live near me?, 'cause just down the road there is a similar situation.

[britmaveric]

A fool and his money soon part!!!

[Braccobaldo]

..........................Needless to say she became a sort of "hero" for the locals here....everybody pay she respect 'cause now she can have everything needed...

...and the englishman is considered very very "good man" that "love her lady for sure"...

....ahhh, Thai way of thinking....

...I really would like to read your comments on it....

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Ummmm...well actually I suspect the locals are really saying "what a stupid Farang".

What you describe does happen on occasion I think, sad yea, but true. In fact not far from me.....by the way do you live near me?, 'cause just down the road there is a similar situation.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

...no..it is not near Korat....

[lampard10]

Don't forget a lot of old farangs do have the "can't take it with you" theory. They have lived out their lives in horrible old Falang land, probably with their ugly, fat Farang spouse and have amassed a fortune. Now comes the time when they are given an oppertunity to live the life of their dreams with a beautiful ( in his eyes) young thing ( you said she was ugly, in that case how has she so many boy-friends) and get rid of all the money they have stashed away for a rainy day. Now it's pissing down and they are probably a happy as a pig in. So mind your own Goddamn business.

Edited October 11, 2005 by lampard10

[Judge]

I would suspect that this is the first lady to ever pay this gentlemen the least bit of attention in his whole life!

[Braccobaldo]

It's really nobody's business what Falang does with his money

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Absolutely!!!...just making gossips for fun...and also for point out how many differences there are between the farangs and thai "way of thinking"...

[h90]

lol, very very common here!

My wife never wanted a single baht from me and whenever she hears such stories she get a red face and killing everyone arround with sentences like:

"the junk Isaan (needless to tell that she comes from the south and that there are some minor tensions to the eastern and northern ones), discrediting Thailand, only waiting for money, blablabla......."

Saw it many times that she got nearly physically violent when hearing such stories.

There are millions of stories in which the farang spend all his money and after he got kicked (after the house is completed and the money is finished often the status is changing from hero and loved by the community to absolut idiot).

[Neeranam]

QUOTE(pnustedt @ 2005-10-11 09:02:41)

It's really nobody's business what Falang does with his money

Absolutely!!!...just making gossips for fun...and also for point out how many differences there are between the farangs and thai "way of thinking"...

I think it is my business to protect my fellow farnag.

I have seen 4 farnags, in the last year, who bought their wife in Pattaya lose a fortune in Isaan. I saw 2 who met their wife on the internet lose a house and car.

I heard about a few more too. The 2 who met on the internet built a house and the day the house was finished, they were told to leave.

These guys make the rest of us look bad. When I am going about my daily business, it's emabarrassing when I get that f'ng stupid smile from some arse in Tesco Lotus. More often than not he will get a polite smile from the newcomer who has just bought his 'tee rak' a house for 1.5 million and a car for 500,000, after knowing her for 1 year or so. I ask him what the f... he wants or to pi55 off.

Come on guys, if you have met a woman who you are madly in love with, just step back for a moment and gather your senses. Are you being conned?

Could she really love you after 10 years? Why not wait for a while, is there such a rush for you to show your love to her in the form of a house. Rent for a couple of years to make sure

Being lovestuck is the cause, in 3 years the woman will look very different.

Unfotunately to the OP this happens all the time and will probably happen for years to come. Are those of us who know the score going to sit back and watch these, usually decent enough blokes, be made fools of? It does affect our lives too.

I bought a drink in a park a week ago and she asked for 10 baht and then asked the next Thai guy for 9 baht. not the money, of course but the principle. Too many guys, usually elderly never question this, and worse neither do their women.

The norm for these newcomers is about 1 year, maybe 1 and a half and the average money is maybe 2 million baht. Ask yourself, if you are in this category, is she worth 4,000 baht a day, 28,000 a week, 130,000 a month?!

I know 3 guys, who bought their wives, nothing wrong with it, whose relationship turned for the good and they have been married over 10 years, one 25+ years.

They are the minority!

Remember, you buying a house for 1 million baht for a poor country girl is like buying a house for a British girl for 400,000 pounds. Minimum wage in Khon Kaen for example is 150 baht for a 12 hour day.

In UK, 60 pounds.

1 million Baht is equivalent to 400,000 pounds!

If an old woman wanted to marry me in the UK and build me a house for 400,000 pounds I would have let her 15 years ago, when I was in my early 20s, especially if I knew I could ask her to leave as soon as it was bought. If I asked her to buy a new car that no one in my family had ever dreamed of owning too, and she agreed, then I am worth some thing like 1/2 a million pounds. I would have done it. Then I could dump her and go get another old woman and go for the bigger jackpot. I wouldn't mind the embarrassment of going around with an old woman older than my mother, and all my friends would know what was going on. Every one would actually except the poor old woman, but she has unlimited money obviously.

There is not much difference in my way of thinking than the Thai.

Edited October 11, 2005 by Neeranam

[Sir Burr]

Even if you told them; they wouldn't believe you, or, they would think that their wife/GF was different. You would be the "villain".

I see where you are coming from, but, realisticly, there's nothing you can constructively do.

[calibanjr.]

I agree with the above sentiment expressed that it is nobody else's business what someone does fairly/legally with their own money. The only thing that irks me is that when TG's get together, they always talk about how much this or that they get from their BF's and these guys kind of screw up the market and make pikers (like me) look bad. Ups the expectations all around, you might say.

[lampard10]

If an old woman wanted to marry me in the UK and build me a house for 400,000 pounds I would have let her 15 years ago, when I was in my early 20s, especially if I knew I could ask her to leave as soon as it was bought. If I asked her to buy a  new car that no one in my family had ever dreamed of owning too, and she agreed, then I am worth some thing like 1/2 a million pounds. I would have done it. Then I could dump her and go get another old woman and go for the bigger jackpot. I wouldn't mind the embarrassment of going around with an old woman older than my mother, and all my friends would know what was going on. Every one would actually except the poor old woman, but she has unlimited money obviously.

There is not much difference in my way of thinking than the Thai.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I have heard about a thousand more stories of guys in Falang land that have been taken to the cleaners by the woman of their dreams. Some of them after 30-40 years of bliss, some of them after the vows. Look closley at the facts. So many Falangs in Thailand treat the purchase of a woman like the purchase of a car. Something that is theirs to do what they like with, because they paid for it.They can drive anyone elses, but woe betide any one getting behind the wheel of theirs.

That is a pretty useless way of looking at life. Some of my most respected friends are not averse to going off for a short time every now and again, and even frown at me when I say I am not interested. Why should I be. I respect the woman I married. And before around 135% of the readers of this come back with " I'm not one of them" I did say some, not all. Well that's just my point of view.

[Neeranam]

Some of my most respected friends are not averse to going off for a short time every now and again, and even frown at me when I say I am not interested.

They wouldn't get any of my respect I suppose they say that there wife doesn't mind! &lt;deleted&gt;, they are hurting her, selfish bastards.

[slimdog]

If an old woman wanted to marry me in the UK and build me a house for 400,000 pounds I would have let her 15 years ago, when I was in my early 20s, especially if I knew I could ask her to leave as soon as it was bought. If I asked her to buy a  new car that no one in my family had ever dreamed of owning too, and she agreed, then I am worth some thing like 1/2 a million pounds. I would have done it. Then I could dump her and go get another old woman and go for the bigger jackpot. I wouldn't mind the embarrassment of going around with an old woman older than my mother, and all my friends would know what was going on. Every one would actually except the poor old woman, but she has unlimited money obviously.

There is not much difference in my way of thinking than the Thai.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I have heard about a thousand more stories of guys in Falang land that have been taken to the cleaners by the woman of their dreams. Some of them after 30-40 years of bliss, some of them after the vows. Look closley at the facts. So many Falangs in Thailand treat the purchase of a woman like the purchase of a car. Something that is theirs to do what they like with, because they paid for it.They can drive anyone elses, but woe betide any one getting behind the wheel of theirs.

That is a pretty useless way of looking at life. Some of my most respected friends are not averse to going off for a short time every now and again, and even frown at me when I say I am not interested. Why should I be. I respect the woman I married. And before around 135% of the readers of this come back with " I'm not one of them" I did say some, not all. Well that's just my point of view.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[Sir Burr]

If an old woman wanted to marry me in the UK and build me a house for 400,000 pounds I would have let her 15 years ago, when I was in my early 20s, especially if I knew I could ask her to leave as soon as it was bought. If I asked her to buy a  new car that no one in my family had ever dreamed of owning too, and she agreed, then I am worth some thing like 1/2 a million pounds. I would have done it. Then I could dump her and go get another old woman and go for the bigger jackpot. I wouldn't mind the embarrassment of going around with an old woman older than my mother, and all my friends would know what was going on. Every one would actually except the poor old woman, but she has unlimited money obviously.

There is not much difference in my way of thinking than the Thai.

They would'nt get any of my respect, I suppose they say that there wife doesn't mind! &lt;deleted&gt;, they are hurting her, selfish bastards.

You are being a bit hypocritical, don't you think?

[Neeranam]

You are being a bit hypocritical, don't you think?

No.

I was talking about 15 years ago when I was a young single man.

We are supposed to grow up when we get older.

[Braccobaldo]

well...very interesting posts...I'm happy for those happily married with Thai lady...sure is that more often these "transoceanic" relationship failed...in Italy we used to say "wife and cows from your country"...

[Sir Burr]

Your last sentence was in the present tense, which lead me to believe you feel the same way.

[Neeranam]

I hope this is not going to turn into a "justifying cheating on my wife thread"

Your last sentence was in the present tense, which lead me to believe you feel the same way.

Sorry Sir, it was my mistake. It was actually nothing to do with what a had just written immediately previous.

Edited October 11, 2005 by Neeranam

[Sir Burr]

Sorry Sir, it was my mistake. It was actually nothing to do with what a had just written immediately previous.

Okey, dokey. Just a misunderstanding.

[Braccobaldo]

Your last sentence was in the present tense, which lead me to believe you feel the same way.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Yes, i think so....but anyway also with "farang lady" can have problems....but it's always better "to play at home" this kind of match.

[Neeranam]

QUOTE(Sir Burr @ 2005-10-11 15:26:30)

Your last sentence was in the present tense, which lead me to believe you feel the same way.

Yes, i think so....but anyway also with "farang lady" can have problems....but it's always better "to play at home" this kind of match.

mai cow jai

[Braccobaldo]

QUOTE(Sir Burr @ 2005-10-11 15:26:30)

Your last sentence was in the present tense, which lead me to believe you feel the same way.

Yes, i think so....but anyway also with "farang lady" can have problems....but it's always better "to play at home" this kind of match.

mai cow jai

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

...I thought he was referring to me....pom pit nik noi...

[chang35baht]

I think that most failed marriages arise from the vast age differences tha occur in so many of the relationships formed in Thailand. There are very few of us living here that didn,t meet their GF/future wife in a bar somewhere. That,s not to say that a relationship with these origins will not work.

I think that older people should think long and hard about why a particular girl has the hots for him. It`s not that they find you attractive.

Fortunately my wife and I are only two years apart in age and she is quite well educated which makes it easier for us to communicate. whereas someone who is 30-35 years older than their Gf/wife who still hasn,t had to many life experiences yet will come up against a lot of pregnant pauses when they are having their little romantic quiet nights in. Communication is a major cause of arguments in most relationships. Even back in our home countries, let alone when their are 2 different pasaa`s involved. I,m all for people who want to enjoy themselves in their formative years. But innevitably some will get hurt. It`s a fact of life

Anna Nicole Smith is the example from the western world. It`s just that there`s more of it over here.

Also It`s harder for older gentlemen to meet people closer to their own age over hear especially when they are freshmen so to speak. It`s not impossible for someone who speaks a little bit of Thai to strike up a conversation with someone in a restaraunt or at a social gathering.

What`s the point of my blabbering? I don`t really know because most of you guys have been here for enough years to know what I`m talking about. But maybe someone who is thinking of coming her to retire will read this and the other posts from people who(hopefully) know what they are talking about(not necassarily me) and tread carefully when they do decide to make the move the land of smiles and that it continues to beam on theirs and our faces.

Goodnight and God bless.

[Tywais]

What`s the point of my blabbering? I don`t really know because most of you guys have been here for enough years to know what I`m talking about. But maybe someone who is thinking of coming her to retire will read this and the other posts from people who(hopefully) know what they are talking about(not necassarily me) and tread carefully when they do decide to make the move the land of smiles and that it continues to beam on theirs and our faces.

It reminds me of a friend of mine. We were both going to Thailand at the same time and decided to meet up in Bangkok. This is when I had sold everything and committed to living in Thailand. He was coming over for a few months to see if he could retire here. He was in his 60's me in my 40's. In our many discussions about the whys and hows of living here some alarm bells were going off about his reasons. I gave him a discourse on my reasons for coming (women were a very small part of the equation for me - HONESTLY) and that coming here for only the women would eventually lead to a unhappy life.

He immediately took exception and incensed about my statement and basically told me to piss off, that wasn't why he was here. I decided to back off. The next day he told me he had a marvelous night with two young lasses in his room. For the next 3-4 months he was still showing this behaviour and rarely did I see him without a beer in his hand. Because of the effect (weather) on his health he decided he couldn't live here.

Moral, some people will not listen to the opinions of people with experience. In my case I had already been coming to Thailand for over 20 years and pretty much knew my reasons for coming to stay.

[Neeranam]

There are very few of us living here that didn,t meet their GF/future wife in a bar somewhere.

I think that there might be quite a few who didn't.

There is nothing abnormal about meeting in a bar, the type of bar makes a huge difference though and the reason for being there.

I think that most failed marriages arise from the vast age differences tha occur in so many of the relationships formed in Thailand.

My opinion is different here. I think it is to do with the huge difference in finances and the fact that the marriage is not thought through.

You made some good points, certainly not blabbering.

[pnustedt]

I think it is my business to protect my fellow farnag.

Oh no - not the cape crusader English teaching super protector of the dumb farangs!

[opothai]

who is stupid, falang or thai

in my travels i have come across this situation twice, and both falangs has lost upwards of 2 million baht, which luckily to them was nothing, so the falang has had his fun and been happy for a year or two so no problem.

the thai girls that extract the money and take the piss have been left with a house they can not afford a community that now look upon her as stupid as she can not parade around the village buying all and sunder drinks, food and parties. she is forever ringing up ex falang for money and the usual im am sorry my love it was not my fault but my friends tell me what to do. inevitably she sells the house and goes back to her old ways.

the falang moves on and if he gets lucky he finds a sensible girl and he can see out his days in comfort and happiness and the girl is also happy and not stupid.

i'm afraid it's the luck of the draw. but the final decision comes down to the person who holds the purse strings,

if the falang does not have 2 mllion to waste then he must be very careful.

[Neeranam]

QUOTE(Neeranam @ 2005-10-11 14:08:29)

I think it is my business to protect my fellow farnag.

Oh no - not the cape crusader English teaching super protector of the dumb farangs! ohmy.gif

Worrying that you may have been ripped off, or she wants you for more than your looks and nice personality? Do you think she loves your "poong"?

Aren't you the guy who gives the family millions, just bought her 2 brothers brand new pick-ups?

I'd like to ask how much you have given the family, but it's not any of my business, as someone said, you just won't listen.

BTW I am not an English teacher. What the f.. has an English teacher got to do with anything anyway? Are you trying to say that you are somehow better as you are making more money? Or maybe just because someone teaches English they should be laughed at?