What Causes A Small %age Of Thai Girls To Lie?

[Noel]

My sister in law had a baby boy a few years back.  I was told that he was quite sick but I didn't know exactly what it was.  A couple of months later I was told he had passed away.  I still always wonder if things would have been different if she has had more money in her pocket.  And I do blame myself for not having tried better to offer help.  She has always been very reluctant to ask for money from us.

She now works in Bangkok in a factory with no less than 12 hrs a day for a few thousand baht and hardly has the luxury of spending time together with her son(about 10yrs old living in Isaan).  She had to stop working for half a month last month due to a back pain and had to borrow a few thousand baht from my wife. 

I feel so proud of having such a wonderful woman as a sister in law.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

And so you should...

[zaz]

When it comes down to it I think we people with our backgrounds of living relatively comfortably and with the backup of a good social welfare system (here in the UK anyway) see the poorer people in Thailand for example and obviously feel sorry for them. But we must realise that there is poverty in many many parts of the world and often worse than Thailand. Other countries and their people deal with it differently. Other countries also have a lot less to offer to the rest of the world in way of trade and tourism. Thailand has a lot to offer and it is also a beautiful tourist destination. It just so happens that Thailand is also home to women that are extremely attractive too and that has by hook or crook become an economy in itself. All these factors make it individual but by far not the worst situation it's poorest people can be in.

[Noel]

Would you not be better off spending the money that you would have spent on the girl on a refuge or charity to help these girls out of the situation that they are in?

In the end these girls do it out of a need for survival not intentionally for greed and deceit although i am sure it probably looks that way.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hmm..., Please Click Here

[zaz]

In the end these girls do it out of a need for survival not intentionally for greed and deceit although i am sure it probably looks that way.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

dayleyboy, I think that can be said for some of the girls but I think other girls are so accustomed to their lifestyle of drinking, hanging out with their girlfriends, meeting foreign guys all the time and just generally having a good time that it's too good to give up. It's a life of complete leisure and it's not even their money.

Let's not forget there are many people who survive on what pitifull earnings they get without resorting to selling their bodies. Hence the reason for the girls choosing that way of life is actually greed and not necessarily survival.

[GuestHouse]

dayleyboy, I think that can be said for some of the girls but I think other girls are so accustomed to their lifestyle of drinking, hanging out with their girlfriends, meeting foreign guys all the time and just generally having a good time that it's too good to give up. It's a life of complete leisure and it's not even their money.

Absolutely true.

You can take the girl out of the bar....

[daleyboy]

Would you not be better off spending the money that you would have spent on the girl on a refuge or charity to help these girls out of the situation that they are in?

In the end these girls do it out of a need for survival not intentionally for greed and deceit although i am sure it probably looks that way.

Hmm..., Please Click Here

Thats all very well directing me to your charity page but how come you dont direct people to your favourite website?

http://www.bahtbus.com/bars/

Which is just helping to promote these problems. You have pictures of young kids on a site with an a to z of the best gogo bars in Pattaya.

HMM suffering double standards there Noel?

This is the same as marlboro sponsering a quit smoking program.

[Noel]

Would you not be better off spending the money that you would have spent on the girl on a refuge or charity to help these girls out of the situation that they are in?

In the end these girls do it out of a need for survival not intentionally for greed and deceit although i am sure it probably looks that way.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hmm..., Please Click Here

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Thats all very well directing me to your charity page but how come you dont direct people to your favourite website?

http://www.bahtbus.com/bars/

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Why bark when you have a dog?

[daleyboy]

Would you not be better off spending the money that you would have spent on the girl on a refuge or charity to help these girls out of the situation that they are in?

In the end these girls do it out of a need for survival not intentionally for greed and deceit although i am sure it probably looks that way.

Hmm..., Please Click Here

Thats all very well directing me to your charity page but how come you dont direct people to your favourite website?

http://www.bahtbus.com/bars/

Why bark when you have a dog?

Yeah nice attitute Noel. Happy to tell everyone what a fine upstanding citizen you are by helping with the charity, and all the while advertising the best gogo bars in Pattaya, one of the largest reasons the charity exists in the first place Do you help with the charity so you can sleep better at night?

[Sir Burr]

All morals are luxuries if life's necessities haven't been gained.

[meemiathai]

In the end these girls do it out of a need for survival not intentionally for greed and deceit although i am sure it probably looks that way.

dayleyboy, I think that can be said for some of the girls but I think other girls are so accustomed to their lifestyle of drinking, hanging out with their girlfriends, meeting foreign guys all the time and just generally having a good time that it's too good to give up. It's a life of complete leisure and it's not even their money.

Let's not forget there are many people who survive on what pitifull earnings they get without resorting to selling their bodies. Hence the reason for the girls choosing that way of life is actually greed and not necessarily survival.

Let's not forget that no human being is flawless. We all commit sin from time to time. Let's try to understand that it's easier for them to choose the wrong route in life. And once they have chosen the wrong route, it's difficult for them to realize themselves in the wrong direction. And more to add is that they get used and harmed by a lot of bad men so too often which results in them losing faith towards the possibility of finding a real man that they can trust.

Give them more love and respect instead of money, you will find a lot of good nature in them. They have feelings too.

[meemiathai]

All morals are luxuries if life's necessities haven't been gained.

Short and clear, Sir.

[Noel]

Would you not be better off spending the money that you would have spent on the girl on a refuge or charity to help these girls out of the situation that they are in?

In the end these girls do it out of a need for survival not intentionally for greed and deceit although i am sure it probably looks that way.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hmm..., Please Click Here

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Thats all very well directing me to your charity page but how come you dont direct people to your favourite website?

http://www.bahtbus.com/bars/

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Why bark when you have a dog?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Yeah nice attitute Noel. Happy to tell everyone what a fine upstanding citizen you are by helping with the charity, and all the while advertising the best gogo bars in Pattaya, one of the largest reasons the charity exists in the first place Do you help with the charity so you can sleep better at night?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I have no wish to get into a spat with you daleyboy, I prefer to just continue living in the real world.

[zaz]

Let's not forget that no human being is flawless.  We all commit sin from time to time.  Let's try to understand that it's easier for them to choose the wrong route in life.  And once they have chosen the wrong route, it's difficult for them to realize themselves in the wrong direction.  And more to add is that they get used and harmed by a lot of bad men so too often which results in them losing faith towards the possibility of finding a real man that they can trust. 

Give them more love and respect instead of money, you will find a lot of good nature in them.  They have feelings too. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Totally agree with you. They are at the end of the day human too and there can be no substitute to treating a person as a person and not an item that can be bought off a shelf.

Give them more love and respect instead of money, you will find a lot of good nature in them.  They have feelings too. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

This is the one thing that I always hope is the life line for them. Some of my TV friends will know that I support the view that, given the chance, these girls have hope if they meet the right guy. Can't guarantee that for 100% of them as I've read many cases of it all being a facade, on their part, from begining to end but, I'd take my chances any day by playing it as carefully as I could. Not saying that that's the type of girl I'd go looking for in the first place, why make life more difficult for myself? But should I end up in that situation I'd just be me (= gullible/naive..?).

Like you say there are many guys that treat them like crap and they have been driven into treating guys as ATM machines in return but who knows? I'd really like to know what goes through their minds and what their outlook on life is.

[meom]

The money/financial security aspect is a little overdone if that's what they really want.  As many western women may agree a lasting relationship is not dependant on money.  The casual attitude to sex in Thailand and/or Asia can only be down to the culture in this part of the world because I for one just cannot get my head round just how casual it is.  If it's all about money, which a high percentage will be, then it really is sad.

I think initially it's all about money and only later in the relation (couple of years or whatever) the money aspect fades to the background and love as we know it in the west might develop.

In the west it's the other way around; ia relation starts with love and later the bitching about money etc. pushes love in the background.

[Sir Burr]

I think initially it's all about money and only later in the relation (couple of years or whatever) the money aspect fades to the background and love as we know it in the west might develop.

Hit the nail on the head.

In India where most marriages are arranged, the saying is "You love the man you marry, you don't marry the man you love".

[OlRedEyes]

All morals are luxuries if life's necessities haven't been gained.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

A great truth, truly realized by few.

Coming from a relatively much more fortunate background, or a downright privileged one, many Farang look at the poverty in which so many of these girls have grown up, and declare that they 'understand' the need the girls have for improvement but despite this judge them as bad, greedy, without morals etc.

Looking at poverty and being caught in it with very little hope of escape, facing a pretty desolate future, are vastly different things.

Simple, if you have not been in it, boots and all, 100%, don't judge.

[Guest endure]

The money/financial security aspect is a little overdone if that's what they really want.  As many western women may agree a lasting relationship is not dependant on money.  The casual attitude to sex in Thailand and/or Asia can only be down to the culture in this part of the world because I for one just cannot get my head round just how casual it is.  If it's all about money, which a high percentage will be, then it really is sad.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I think initially it's all about money and only later in the relation (couple of years or whatever) the money aspect fades to the background and love as we know it in the west might develop.

In the west it's the other way around; ia relation starts with love and later the bitching about money etc. pushes love in the background.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I think there's a basic difference in attitude to love & money between the east and the west. In the west , if you love somone, you prove that love by not wanting any of their money. In the east if you love someone you prove it by sharing what you have with them.

[Johpa]

....How many Western women would do the same. What's the average wage? I'm sure there would be a lot more "prossie" in my country if the same relative jackpots were so easily available there.

It's not that Thai women are liars or cheats, it's because the poor ones just can't refuse the easy big money.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Do you not think the same things does not happen in western countries? The only difference is that the western women who want to snag a rich boy usually don't have to work in the sex industry, altough it certainly helps.

In Thailand it is not easy money. The women have to sleep with countless low life Farangs whose understanding of Thai culture is from reading Stickman, hanging out in the smoke filled bars until they find one stupid enough to believe that a young woman half their age actually thinks they are handsome and that she loves them.

My sister-inlaw recently tool some foolish middle aged English bloke to the cleaners and I was very happy for her and had no sympathy for his children who wrote the our family to bemoan their father's fate. I am equally happy for every bar girl who either finds true love or takes the idiot for all he is worth. In the past, I had no qualms about writing the "your my superman" letters for the girls to assist in the fleecing. And these same women have been all to honest in their relationships with me. So you mileage may vary when it comes to defining honesty.

[Ice Maiden]

The money/financial security aspect is a little overdone if that's what they really want.  As many western women may agree a lasting relationship is not dependant on money.  The casual attitude to sex in Thailand and/or Asia can only be down to the culture in this part of the world because I for one just cannot get my head round just how casual it is.  If it's all about money, which a high percentage will be, then it really is sad.

Today whilst I was at school (learning the Thai language) my teacher and I got onto a discussion about the Thai culture.

I took a pen and some paper and drew a picture. A man in the middle and money at one side and love at the other. I asked him what meant more to him and he answered:

"Money, because you carn't be happy without money"

I was quite shocked, I asked him why carn't a poor person still be happy? And he said that you carn't have what you want etc. So I drew another picture, one of a person in a small house, a dead man on the floor and a man on the street. I told him the man in the house can be happy because he isn't on the streets, the man on the streets is happy because he isn't dead.

Thailand is called The Land Of Smiles for a reason and I always thought poorer people such as Thais were happy with their "Mai bpen rai" attitudes.

He looked very shocked but agreed with me.

I asked him what meant the most to him I told him to write out a list. You know what he wrote?

1. Money

2. Motorbike, telephone, house etc

3. Love

I went on to tell him he carn't buy love if he has all the money in the world but he went on to say you can, I asked him why and he said because if you have money females love you which made me laugh! Okay some but not all. I asked him if he had any questions so I wrote them all down and I said to him the answer to these are not money but he told me they were

I asked the same question to the teacher next door she said the same as him. I went home and asked my Step-mum but she said everyone in Thailand are different but most Thais believe money comes first.

I think the Thais are brought up by their mothers and fathers to believe that money is the answer to all their problems. And I've seen the higher earns in the family to have more respect like my Step-mum for example, everyone basicaly kisses her feet. So they have this goal to go out there and earn as much money as they can so they have respect which I think is very important to them and all the answers to many of their questions will be answered with money.

This is just my opinion though.

[Rj 81]

The money/financial security aspect is a little overdone if that's what they really want.  As many western women may agree a lasting relationship is not dependant on money.  The casual attitude to sex in Thailand and/or Asia can only be down to the culture in this part of the world because I for one just cannot get my head round just how casual it is.  If it's all about money, which a high percentage will be, then it really is sad.

Today whilst I was at school (learning the Thai language) my teacher and I got onto a discussion about the Thai culture.

I took a pen and some paper and drew a picture. A man in the middle and money at one side and love at the other. I asked him what meant more to him and he answered:

"Money, because you carn't be happy without money"

I was quite shocked, I asked him why carn't a poor person still be happy? And he said that you carn't have what you want etc. So I drew another picture, one of a person in a small house, a dead man on the floor and a man on the street. I told him the man in the house can be happy because he isn't on the streets, the man on the streets is happy because he isn't dead.

Thailand is called The Land Of Smiles for a reason and I always thought poorer people such as Thais were happy with their "Mai bpen rai" attitudes.

He looked very shocked but agreed with me.

I asked him what meant the most to him I told him to write out a list. You know what he wrote?

1. Money

2. Motorbike, telephone, house etc

3. Love

I went on to tell him he carn't buy love if he has all the money in the world but he went on to say you can, I asked him why and he said because if you have money females love you which made me laugh! Okay some but not all. I asked him if he had any questions so I wrote them all down and I said to him the answer to these are not money but he told me they were

I asked the same question to the teacher next door she said the same as him. I went home and asked my Step-mum but she said everyone in Thailand are different but most Thais believe money comes first.

I think the Thais are brought up by their mothers and fathers to believe that money is the answer to all their problems. And I've seen the higher earns in the family to have more respect like my Step-mum for example, everyone basicaly kisses her feet. So they have this goal to go out there and earn as much money as they can so they have respect which I think is very important to them and all the answers to many of their questions will be answered with money.

This is just my opinion though.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hey, who was teaching who?

Well in there Ice!

Rj

[Ice Maiden]

Rj 81 - He's not my type

We are always having these long discussions about our cultures aswell as me learning Thai

[Rj 81]

Rj 81 - He's not my type 

We are always having these long discussions about our cultures aswell as me learning Thai

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I didn't mean in that sort of way, I meant you being the student and him being the teacher, but you asking him the questions

Do you know what I mean?

err am getting confused now

Rj

[Ice Maiden]

Rj 81 - He's not my type 

We are always having these long discussions about our cultures aswell as me learning Thai

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I didn't mean in that sort of way, I meant you being the student and him being the teacher, but you asking him the questions

Do you know what I mean?

err am getting confused now

Rj

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sowwie, misunderstood you there.

It's not like secondary school I don't have to wear a uniform and that kind of thing. It's a language school, lots of men with thai girlfriends go there to learn Thai and a couple of tourists go.

I know what you mean but the teacher sort of becomes your friend because it's private lessons and I think who better to ask about Thai culture than a Thai person. I have many questions I ask every now and then. To learn the language I think you should learn about the culture too.

Edited October 31, 2005 by Ice Maiden

[Mighty Mouse]

It's not that Thai women are liars or cheats, it's because the poor ones just can't refuse the easy big money.

Anna Nicole Smith married an 89 year old billionaire. She told him that she loved his cotton socks. He fell for it. Was she lying?

I stroll down Walking Street and can hear them calling out: "Hey handsome man; hello sexy; I love you big time...etc. Are they lying? I hope not !

There is no social welfare system in Thailand. Parents therefore rely on their children to take care of them in their fading years. Most children grow up with the understanding that they are the family providers and they go about this task as best they can.

Do they marry for love, do they marry for security or do they marry into as much money as they possibly can? A debatable question.

Love doesn't put food on the table.

[Fast Eddie]

My sister-inlaw recently tool some foolish middle aged English bloke to the cleaners and I was very happy for her and had no sympathy for his children who wrote the our family to bemoan their father's fate.  I am equally happy for every bar girl who either finds true love or takes the idiot for all he is worth.  In the past, I had no qualms about writing the "your my superman" letters for the girls to assist in the fleecing.  And these same women have been all to honest in their relationships with me.  So you mileage may vary when it comes to defining honesty.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

If you truly do take such delight in seeing other people deceived and ruined, then i guess it would be very fitting for someone who you trust to take you to the cleaners one day.

It would be interesting to hear how happy you are with such conduct then.

Edited November 1, 2005 by Fast Eddie

[Rj 81]

Have to agree

[mbkudu]

What understanding do you have of Asian culture in general Neeranam?

This is a good question. From many of his long past posts he has given the impression that he is 'Mr. Intheknow' of Thailand, but recently he has been posting things that are puzzling to say the least. I'm too lazy to go back and find the posts, but there are a few that made me think, "Why is he asking these questions when he has lived in Thailand for years?" No disrespect Neeranam, I'm certain you're a dandy bloke and a good teacher.

[Guest endure]

My sister-inlaw recently tool some foolish middle aged English bloke to the cleaners and I was very happy for her and had no sympathy for his children who wrote the our family to bemoan their father's fate.  I am equally happy for every bar girl who either finds true love or takes the idiot for all he is worth.  In the past, I had no qualms about writing the "your my superman" letters for the girls to assist in the fleecing.  And these same women have been all to honest in their relationships with me.  So you mileage may vary when it comes to defining honesty.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

If you truly do take such delight in seeing other people deceived and ruined, then i guess it would be very fitting for someone who you trust to take you to the cleaners one day.

It would be interesting to hear how happy you are with such conduct then.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Johpa has spent years bragging about writing letters that shaft gullible farangs. It's only a pity that the woman he married didn't turn out to be a whore who did the same to him. Then he could have spent a little time in the Buddhism forum instructing us on the effects of kamma instead of laying out before us his smug hypocrisy.

[Johpa]

My sister-inlaw recently tool some foolish middle aged English bloke to the cleaners and I was very happy for her and had no sympathy for his children who wrote the our family to bemoan their father's fate.  I am equally happy for every bar girl who either finds true love or takes the idiot for all he is worth.  In the past, I had no qualms about writing the "your my superman" letters for the girls to assist in the fleecing.  And these same women have been all to honest in their relationships with me.  So you mileage may vary when it comes to defining honesty.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

If you truly do take such delight in seeing other people deceived and ruined, then i guess it would be very fitting for someone who you trust to take you to the cleaners one day.

It would be interesting to hear how happy you are with such conduct then.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

If I ever get to the point where I believe such fantasies, that I become so naive, pen seubeu thung khanaat nan ko, then I will have deserved to have been taken to the cleaners. I might not be too happy about it, but I have received my just rewards. I am going to tell my son right now that if I ever fall in love with a Thai girl his sister's age who claims she loves me then he has my permission to shoot me dead and protect his meagre inheritance. I will have a lawyer draw up a no liability agreement tomorrow.

The funny thing about the English bloke that was financially injured is that if he hadn't been such a pervert she might have stayed with him. But his stupidity was but one of his failings. Really, after some 25 years, I have rarely met the Farang man in Thailand who didn't deserve his fate. And that includes moi.

[Neeranam]

I started this thread for what reason? To be honest, I'm not sure, but there had been a lot of posts about how bad Thai women are, and I wanted to try and show how much cash is at stake here and most people I know would tell a lie or three to get so much more than they have ever known, especially when in dire straights.

Most new farang I meet just haven't a clue as to how much their money means to the average Thai from the countryside - sex-worker, or shop assistant, whatever. I was trying to say that if you put yourself into their position, you would probably do exactly the same, I know I would.

Through my work in a governmental institution in Isaan, I have heard lots of heart-breaking stories, and come to see that most, but not all, girls are decent underneath. The gist of the stories are they can't make any money in there home town, maybe 2000 baht a month if they are lucky. Some are lazy, some get abused by there family members, some have a brother dying from AIDS related disease or a sick parent who can't get hospital treatment(or don't want to die using the 30 baht scheme), some have a sick buffalo(the main family earner), father has been shot by the local gambling mafia(police) and they are threatening mum and uncle now unless they get some cash. Generally they are not happy with their life, and are looking for a way out, or got into big debt. Pattaya is the destination for many of them. When they are offered 10,000 baht a month by some gullible tourist, they really can't understand it. They think all farang are like that - either way too much money or insane, or both. They don't like ripping someone off, but the jackpot is so big.

Imagine a Thai country girl - 2000 baht a month, getting 10,000 baht a month.

In my country an un-eduacted girl may get 1000 pounds a month, what would she do for 5000 pounds a month especially if her family couldn't afford clothes, or her ex husband had a huge gambling debt?

Thai country girl gets a house built for her, worth 1 million baht. Her father's house is worth 200,000 baht. Same as a girl in my country getting a house built for her for 1 million pounds by some rich fat hairy Arab gentleman with a strange smell. No offense to Arabs, just an example of how some Thai women see farang.

If she can get rid of the lovestruck guy and keep the house that will support her family for years to come, without working, she is tempted.

It was so bloody easy, maybe she could do the same again with another one, but now she is experienced, can speak a bit of English and knows more about these guys who come to Thailand for sex and maybe marriage. Maybe she could tell a few white lies to keep things going smoothly for a couple of years until the guy gains her trust - then bang hit him for all he is worth.

Is she a bad person? Whose fault is it?

She is a small minority of Thai women.