Oh goddam me, and my curiosity gene..i just googled to see if it is in fact even possible.

..it is.

Sure. It is...

But still requires an extraordinarily limber and well-endowed guy.

Most [regardless of how they consider themselves] are ill-equipped to do so.

no good....I only like women.

Is doing your own any different to doing some one else's?

I guess the poll results for this would be a very small group indeed.

As an aside when I was a lad it seemed like I was walking around with a couple of tins of condensed milk permanently replacing my testicles. They must have needed "draining" at least 3 times a day. One day my folks were going out so it was a case of fire up the old Ferguson Videostar and spend a bit of time in the company of some grainy VHS Color Climax smut brought over from the continent by my mate's dad who was an artic driver.

Close curtains in the living room and settle back for some thrapping when to my consternation I heard my mum bang on the window saying that she'd forgotten something. Mild panic turned to horror when I looked up and saw i hadn't closed the curtains properly and my mum was peering through the gap.....

As an aside when I was a lad it seemed like I was walking around with a couple of tins of condensed milk permanently replacing my testicles. They must have needed "draining" at least 3 times a day. One day my folks were going out so it was a case of fire up the old Ferguson Videostar and spend a bit of time in the company of some grainy VHS Color Climax smut brought over from the continent by my mate's dad who was an artic driver.

Close curtains in the living room and settle back for some thrapping when to my consternation I heard my mum bang on the window saying that she'd forgotten something. Mild panic turned to horror when I looked up and saw i hadn't closed the curtains properly and my mum was peering through the gap.....

haha I had a similar experience whilst listening to Pink Floyd on 33' with my headphones on!

Is doing your own any different to doing some one else's?

I guess the benefit would be knowing where its been.

Is doing your own any different to doing some one else's?

I guess the benefit would be knowing where its been.

Not necessarily a benefit

At least you can make an informed decision.

My missus only gets angry if I smile while doing it.

Depends who is masturbating, who.....

i wonder what kind of people would ask a question like

Does Your Wife Get Angry If You Masturbate ?

My missus only gets angry if I smile while doing it.

Is she Japanese?

My missus only gets angry if I smile while doing it.

Is she Japanese?

No.

But speaking of Japanese. She always told me that size did not matter, a small penis is fine as long as you can use it properly.

That's fine, but I still wish she did not have one.

i wonder what kind of people would ask a question like

Does Your Wife Get Angry If You Masturbate ?

I wonder what kind of people ask what kind of people ask....

My missus only gets angry if I smile while doing it.

Is she Japanese?

No.

But speaking of Japanese. She always told me that size did not matter, a small penis is fine as long as you can use it properly.

That's fine, but I still wish she did not have one.

He he he,,,, sooooo funny.

Edited May 12, 201214 yr by Zpete

Seconded Pete - almost as funny as poor old Taddy's rant...

Seconded Pete - almost as funny as poor old Taddy's rant...

Do you want another one...... my internet connection went down last Thursday and only came back on an hour ago, so I'm in the mood.

I have a pet monkey that masturbates and his partner does not get angry with him...she just lets him go at it every other quarter hour.

well...you know...with the MiL and the SiL I don't mind if they walk in on me downstairs in my 'study' (either together or individually) when in front of the laptop screen and 'compromised' and I then often request that they 'lend a hand' in my endeavors as they are very attractive women...and they then laugh and decline assistance...

but then I haveta watch out for the teenaged nieces and the younger kids (the house can get very crowded sometimes); and when at the top of the stairs the nieces stomp and shout: 'uncle tutsi!...uncle tutsi! ...' so that I have an opportunity to hide the equipment and change the screen on the laptop before they descend...they're mostly wanting 40 baht for some khanom or something innocuous but it may be their evil plan to disrupt their uncle tutsi's pleasure...

and then, the little niece who is still a little 9 y.o. girl likes to silently 'sneak up' on folks and surprise them for fun and then I haveta be really careful when she gets home from school after 4pm as I can't hear or see her coming down the stairs...she's never caught me yet but I usually conclude my laptop business in that regard in the mornings after she's left for school with the fear that I may be discovered later...

the wife she just folds her arms and looks at the ceiling...

when I was 11-12 y.o at my grandparents house in Nashville my grandma (who was a very proper victorian woman) walked in, looked and then chortled: 'you are a masturbator' (it was her way of expressing disapproval) and I was ashamed...I should have learned my lesson then...

well...you know...with the MiL and the SiL I don't mind if they walk in on me downstairs in my 'study' (either together or individually) when in front of the laptop screen and 'compromised' and I then often request that they 'lend a hand' in my endeavors as they are very attractive women...and they then laugh and decline assistance...

but then I haveta watch out for the teenaged nieces and the younger kids (the house can get very crowded sometimes); and when at the top of the stairs the nieces stomp and shout: 'uncle tutsi!...uncle tutsi! ...' so that I have an opportunity to hide the equipment and change the screen on the laptop before they descend...they're mostly wanting 40 baht for some khanom or something innocuous but it may be their evil plan to disrupt their uncle tutsi's pleasure...

and then, the little niece who is still a little 9 y.o. girl likes to silently 'sneak up' on folks and surprise them for fun and then I haveta be really careful when she gets home from school after 4pm as I can't hear or see her coming down the stairs...she's never caught me yet but I usually conclude my laptop business in that regard in the mornings after she's left for school with the fear that I may be discovered later...

the wife she just folds her arms and looks at the ceiling...

when I was 11-12 y.o at my grandparents house in Nashville my grandma (who was a very proper victorian woman) walked in, looked and then chortled: 'you are a masturbator' (it was her way of expressing disapproval) and I was ashamed...I should have learned my lesson then...

well...you know...with the MiL and the SiL I don't mind if they walk in on me downstairs in my 'study' (either together or individually) when in front of the laptop screen and 'compromised' and I then often request that they 'lend a hand' in my endeavors as they are very attractive women...and they then laugh and decline assistance...

but then I haveta watch out for the teenaged nieces and the younger kids (the house can get very crowded sometimes); and when at the top of the stairs the nieces stomp and shout: 'uncle tutsi!...uncle tutsi! ...' so that I have an opportunity to hide the equipment and change the screen on the laptop before they descend...they're mostly wanting 40 baht for some khanom or something innocuous but it may be their evil plan to disrupt their uncle tutsi's pleasure...

and then, the little niece who is still a little 9 y.o. girl likes to silently 'sneak up' on folks and surprise them for fun and then I haveta be really careful when she gets home from school after 4pm as I can't hear or see her coming down the stairs...she's never caught me yet but I usually conclude my laptop business in that regard in the mornings after she's left for school with the fear that I may be discovered later...

the wife she just folds her arms and looks at the ceiling...

when I was 11-12 y.o at my grandparents house in Nashville my grandma (who was a very proper victorian woman) walked in, looked and then chortled: 'you are a masturbator' (it was her way of expressing disapproval) and I was ashamed...I should have learned my lesson then...

Only could such words come from someone who has got meat beating down to a fine art. I dub you Sir Tutsi Whack-A-Lot Warrior.

well...you know...with the MiL and the SiL I don't mind if they walk in on me downstairs in my 'study' (either together or individually) when in front of the laptop screen and 'compromised' and I then often request that they 'lend a hand' in my endeavors as they are very attractive women...and they then laugh and decline assistance...

but then I haveta watch out for the teenaged nieces and the younger kids (the house can get very crowded sometimes); and when at the top of the stairs the nieces stomp and shout: 'uncle tutsi!...uncle tutsi! ...' so that I have an opportunity to hide the equipment and change the screen on the laptop before they descend...they're mostly wanting 40 baht for some khanom or something innocuous but it may be their evil plan to disrupt their uncle tutsi's pleasure...

and then, the little niece who is still a little 9 y.o. girl likes to silently 'sneak up' on folks and surprise them for fun and then I haveta be really careful when she gets home from school after 4pm as I can't hear or see her coming down the stairs...she's never caught me yet but I usually conclude my laptop business in that regard in the mornings after she's left for school with the fear that I may be discovered later...

the wife she just folds her arms and looks at the ceiling...

when I was 11-12 y.o at my grandparents house in Nashville my grandma (who was a very proper victorian woman) walked in, looked and then chortled: 'you are a masturbator' (it was her way of expressing disapproval) and I was ashamed...I should have learned my lesson then...

Only could such words come from someone who has got meat beating down to a fine art. I dub you Sir Tutsi Whack-A-Lot Warrior.

yeah...tutsiwarrior has endured 4 generations of female opprobrium (except for the odd wanton that would enthusiastically hand stimulate prior to vigorous fellatio); from my grandma down to the littlest niece so that someone should say: 'is it worth it, tutsi?...' and we all know what the reply to that one is...

Edited May 29, 201214 yr by tutsiwarrior

I had an ex who seemed pretty happy if i masturbated a few times of week if it meant she didn't have to go through the effort of sex. She would even lie next to me and hold my hand or kiss me to get things happening.

I had an ex who seemed pretty happy if i masturbated a few times of week if it meant she didn't have to go through the effort of sex. She would even lie next to me and hold my hand or kiss me to get things happening.

I was going to say something....but then remembered you would probably be offended and chastise me for it...as with that other thread......which you still owe me an apology for.

I had an ex who seemed pretty happy if i masturbated a few times of week if it meant she didn't have to go through the effort of sex. She would even lie next to me and hold my hand or kiss me to get things happening.

I was going to say something....but then remembered you would probably be offended and chastise me for it...as with that other thread......which you still owe me an apology for.

oh for farks sake!

Ive read through some of your other posts and can see you are consistent in your style of humour and at times esoteric content.

With the subject of bought/brought your 'joke' made more sense.. in that context, although i still think it was poor taste considering the subject, i concede you meant no ill will.

if you had quoted the offending sentence it would have made things much clearer at the time.

There ya go.

You could put that first sentence in Eeks other thread.

Have to go look up esoteric....hope you dun owe me another apology.

There ya go.

You could put that first sentence in Eeks other thread.

Have to go look up esoteric....hope you dun owe me another apology.

It wasn't meant as an insult. I have nothing against esoteric comments, nor esoteric people, they make the world a more interesting place