Successful Relationships With Thai Women

[PattaniMan]

One more point:

Thai women don't want a Beta male. Like PataniMan.

Beta males only have provider status, but are disrespected otherwise.

Alphas and Betas. Two buzzwords that crop up often in the conversation of those who've been reading articles such as "how to get girlfriends".

Let me ask little Snapper Boy two questions:

1. are you the best in Thailand at what you do?

2. are you at the top of your chosen profession / are you considered a leader in your profession?

If you can answer yes to both questions, contact me privately and be prepared to prove it. After that, I will prove why I too can answer yes.

If you can't do this ............ drop the Alpha-Beta nonsense, keep your anonymity, and accept that an Alpha here on Thaivisa is laughing at you.

[TingTawng]

OK -- so why do you think Thai women want farang boyfriends / husbands?

In all of this, money is much less important than some people on this thread have suggested.

So according to you, Thai women do not really consider money when dating/marrying farangs?

No, not in my experience.

Factors such as appearance, cleanliness, confidence, and a positive attitude take precedence.

OK, so Thai women do not consider money when dating / marrying a farang according to you.

You should have a conversation about this with theblether who believes Thai women marry farangs to escape poverty.

I think the truth lies somewhere between your "pure heart" opinion, and theblether's mercenary one.

Edited December 4, 2011 by TingTawng

[TingTawng]

I don't know which country you are from, but I am from the UK. I can guarantee you that many people work away from home and send money home to support their families in the UK. I would lay you odds that just about every Thaivisa member of an age has had to do so at some point in their lives. I would hazard a guess that even you have had to do so in the past too.

I'm also from the UK and I do not recognise the UK you describe. Also you're not even consistent in your comments - before you were saying how independent the west is, and how independent older people are - now you're saying they're just like Thais, relying on money from their children. So, which is to be?

I'm with you TT, you describe exactly the UK I know, TB must be talking about some sub-culture, maybe his family was from Pakistan or he was a squaddie.

I didn't know anyone in the UK that worked away from home and sent money back.

I didn't know any grandparents that looked after their daughters children while the daughter was off working in a bar.

I totally agree withTT and ludditeman.

One have to be blind not to recognise the differences in the social aspects of western and Thai culture.

In the western culture a child is prepared to be able to support him/herself, whereas in Thailand a child is prepared to support the parents. Sometimes I get the impression the child exists for this purpose alone.

This also creates a downward negative spiral; the burden of supporting the parents reduces the ability to build up a base upon which retirement would be feasible, eventually forcing them to rely on their own children for support at one point. Scary stuff.

Yes, it's a different culture. It ties 3 generations together much tighter than western culture. In the west, you generally have 2 generations that are living together.

I know a lot of young Thais in my area who have done well for themselves, and it's their grandparents that move in with them (rather than send money back home) and look after their kids while they work. I suppose in the west, one parent would work, or both would work, and then they'd pay for childcare for 3 to 4 years.

Edited December 4, 2011 by TingTawng

[GreenSnapper]

Let me ask little Snapper Boy two questions:

1. are you the best in Thailand at what you do?

2. are you at the top of your chosen profession / are you considered a leader in your profession?

If you can answer yes to both questions, contact me privately and be prepared to prove it. After that, I will prove why I too can answer yes.

If you can't do this ............ drop the Alpha-Beta nonsense, keep your anonymity, and accept that an Alpha here on Thaivisa is laughing at you.

Seems I hit a nerve here.

Being easily upset is another typical Beta trait.

Women hate it, and Thai women in particular.

There is nothing wrong being beta. But Betas have provider status. Women will cheat on them if they have a chance. And/or will divorce, as it is common in the West because of the high beta rate of men.

As long men don't understand the basics of relationships and female psychology, they will lose in the end. If you want a successful relationship, with Thai or other women, get rid of the most typical beta behaviours.

[thaibeachlovers]

I asked my Thai teacher if there was a course where I could learn to understand Thai women, he said to me Kun Philip us men will never truly understand women know matter where they come from but a successful relationship has to built on and not just paid for.

After working with thousands of women from many different cultures in a nursing career lasting 28 years I'd second the Thai teacher. No man will ever truly understand women.

Of course it also holds true that no woman will ever really understand men, but I found few willing to accept that truth.

[thaibeachlovers]

Let me ask little Snapper Boy two questions:

1. are you the best in Thailand at what you do?

2. are you at the top of your chosen profession / are you considered a leader in your profession?

If you can answer yes to both questions, contact me privately and be prepared to prove it. After that, I will prove why I too can answer yes.

If you can't do this ............ drop the Alpha-Beta nonsense, keep your anonymity, and accept that an Alpha here on Thaivisa is laughing at you.

Seems I hit a nerve here.

Being easily upset is another typical Beta trait.

Women hate it, and Thai women in particular.

There is nothing wrong being beta. But Betas have provider status. Women will cheat on them if they have a chance. And/or will divorce, as it is common in the West because of the high beta rate of men.

As long men don't understand the basics of relationships and female psychology, they will lose in the end. If you want a successful relationship, with Thai or other women, get rid of the most typical beta behaviours.

Goes back to the origin of the species. A woman looks to a dominant ( alpha ) male to provide the most successful genetic material for survival of her children, but as dominant males are only interested in fathering as many children as possible, she needs an undominant ( beta ) male to look after her and the child.

Mankind may have left the caves long ago, but genetically, we're still cavemen.

[thaibeachlovers]

After reading this, I have come to the conclusion that all farang living in Thailand are mental.

Hmmmm. IMO, after many years of observing people at their most vulnerable, all people are "mental". It's just that some are less mental than others.

[F1fanatic]

Let me ask little Snapper Boy two questions:

1. are you the best in Thailand at what you do?

2. are you at the top of your chosen profession / are you considered a leader in your profession?

If you can answer yes to both questions, contact me privately and be prepared to prove it. After that, I will prove why I too can answer yes.

If you can't do this ............ drop the Alpha-Beta nonsense, keep your anonymity, and accept that an Alpha here on Thaivisa is laughing at you.

Seems I hit a nerve here.

Being easily upset is another typical Beta trait.

Women hate it, and Thai women in particular.

There is nothing wrong being beta. But Betas have provider status. Women will cheat on them if they have a chance. And/or will divorce, as it is common in the West because of the high beta rate of men.

As long men don't understand the basics of relationships and female psychology, they will lose in the end. If you want a successful relationship, with Thai or other women, get rid of the most typical beta behaviours.

Goes back to the origin of the species. A woman looks to a dominant ( alpha ) male to provide the most successful genetic material for survival of her children, but as dominant males are only interested in fathering as many children as possible, she needs an undominant ( beta ) male to look after her and the child.

Mankind may have left the caves long ago, but genetically, we're still cavemen.

So women ignore the alpha men to procreate with beta males?

[thaibeachlovers]

Let me ask little Snapper Boy two questions:

1. are you the best in Thailand at what you do?

2. are you at the top of your chosen profession / are you considered a leader in your profession?

If you can answer yes to both questions, contact me privately and be prepared to prove it. After that, I will prove why I too can answer yes.

If you can't do this ............ drop the Alpha-Beta nonsense, keep your anonymity, and accept that an Alpha here on Thaivisa is laughing at you.

Seems I hit a nerve here.

Being easily upset is another typical Beta trait.

Women hate it, and Thai women in particular.

There is nothing wrong being beta. But Betas have provider status. Women will cheat on them if they have a chance. And/or will divorce, as it is common in the West because of the high beta rate of men.

As long men don't understand the basics of relationships and female psychology, they will lose in the end. If you want a successful relationship, with Thai or other women, get rid of the most typical beta behaviours.

Goes back to the origin of the species. A woman looks to a dominant ( alpha ) male to provide the most successful genetic material for survival of her children, but as dominant males are only interested in fathering as many children as possible, she needs an undominant ( beta ) male to look after her and the child.

Mankind may have left the caves long ago, but genetically, we're still cavemen.

So women ignore the alpha men to procreate with beta males?

Read my reply again. I am saying that women desire to gain alpha genetic material for their children, and a beta male to protect them. In simple language- sleep with alphas to get pregnant and find a sucker to look after the resulting offspring.

I can say that I was once one of those suckers, but never again. Even a beta male will turn given bad enough behaviour by the female.

[TingTawng]

Mankind may have left the caves long ago, but genetically, we're still cavemen.

So true. Consider the fight or flight response - triggered several times a day by most people, and unless you're being chased by the Thai police with truncheons, each and every time it's utterly redundant - a remnant of our caveman days where we had to be alert to danger all day long. Also, our digestive systems - still stuck in the past expecting our caveman diet that LACKS dairy and grain products (look up "paleo diet" in Google - ever more popular these days). And so it is with our innate needs - they haven't changed much in hundreds of thousands of years. I truly hope men and women can live lives of equal opportunity, but 10,000 years of feminism and social engineering won't change human behaviour.

Edited December 4, 2011 by TingTawng

[F1fanatic]

Goes back to the origin of the species. A woman looks to a dominant ( alpha ) male to provide the most successful genetic material for survival of her children, but as dominant males are only interested in fathering as many children as possible, she needs an undominant ( beta ) male to look after her and the child.

Mankind may have left the caves long ago, but genetically, we're still cavemen.

So women ignore the alpha men to procreate with beta males?

Read my reply again. I am saying that women desire to gain alpha genetic material for their children, and a beta male to protect them. In simple language- sleep with alphas to get pregnant and find a sucker to look after the resulting offspring.

I can say that I was once one of those suckers, but never again. Even a beta male will turn given bad enough behaviour by the female.

I'm truly sorry that you have had such bad experiences.

But you are in a minority. Most women (in the West), marry for love and have children with their chosen partner.

Edited December 4, 2011 by F1fanatic

[TingTawng]

Most women (in the West), marry for love

If that's really true, why aren't homeless guys just as eligible as rich guys in the west? What's a trifling thing like money and ability-to-provide ♫ got to do, got to do, got to do with it? ♫

Edited December 4, 2011 by TingTawng

[thaibeachlovers]

Goes back to the origin of the species. A woman looks to a dominant ( alpha ) male to provide the most successful genetic material for survival of her children, but as dominant males are only interested in fathering as many children as possible, she needs an undominant ( beta ) male to look after her and the child.

Mankind may have left the caves long ago, but genetically, we're still cavemen.

So women ignore the alpha men to procreate with beta males?

Read my reply again. I am saying that women desire to gain alpha genetic material for their children, and a beta male to protect them. In simple language- sleep with alphas to get pregnant and find a sucker to look after the resulting offspring.

I can say that I was once one of those suckers, but never again. Even a beta male will turn given bad enough behaviour by the female.

I'm truly sorry that you have had such bad experiences.

But you are in a minority. Most women (in the West), marry for love and have children with their chosen partner.

Quote edited to allow posting

Hmmmm. Sorry, but in my experience it's because men fall for the first woman that doesn't have to be drunk to sleep with them. Goes back to men and women being different. Given the divorce rate, I'm hardly in a minority ( and definitely in a majority amongst farang males ), and love doesn't last long anyway. Being friends with someone is much more important for a successful marriage than being in "love", "whatever that is" ( to quote Prince Charles ).

Edited December 4, 2011 by thaibeachlovers

[F1fanatic]

Most women (in the West), marry for love

If that's really true, why aren't homeless guys just as eligible as rich guys in the west? What's a trifling thing like money and ability-to-provide ♫ got to do, got to do, got to do with it? ♫

Uuum, perhaps its cos most women aren't homeless?

Amazingly enough though, there are homeless men and women in relationships...

[F1fanatic]

Goes back to the origin of the species. A woman looks to a dominant ( alpha ) male to provide the most successful genetic material for survival of her children, but as dominant males are only interested in fathering as many children as possible, she needs an undominant ( beta ) male to look after her and the child.

Mankind may have left the caves long ago, but genetically, we're still cavemen.

So women ignore the alpha men to procreate with beta males?

Read my reply again. I am saying that women desire to gain alpha genetic material for their children, and a beta male to protect them. In simple language- sleep with alphas to get pregnant and find a sucker to look after the resulting offspring.

I can say that I was once one of those suckers, but never again. Even a beta male will turn given bad enough behaviour by the female.

I'm truly sorry that you have had such bad experiences.

But you are in a minority. Most women (in the West), marry for love and have children with their chosen partner.

Quote edited to allow posting

Hmmmm. Sorry, but in my experience it's because men fall for the first woman that doesn't have to be drunk to sleep with them. Goes back to men and women being different. Given the divorce rate, I'm hardly in a minority ( and definitely in a majority amongst farang males ), and love doesn't last long anyway. Being friends with someone is much more important for a successful marriage than being in "love", "whatever that is" ( to quote Prince Charles ).

I'll take your word for it.

I agree about "being friends", but that's a bit difficult to achieve with someone with whom you cannot communicate, let alone understand or agree with their values.

[thaibeachlovers]

Goes back to the origin of the species. A woman looks to a dominant ( alpha ) male to provide the most successful genetic material for survival of her children, but as dominant males are only interested in fathering as many children as possible, she needs an undominant ( beta ) male to look after her and the child.

Mankind may have left the caves long ago, but genetically, we're still cavemen.

So women ignore the alpha men to procreate with beta males?

Read my reply again. I am saying that women desire to gain alpha genetic material for their children, and a beta male to protect them. In simple language- sleep with alphas to get pregnant and find a sucker to look after the resulting offspring.

I can say that I was once one of those suckers, but never again. Even a beta male will turn given bad enough behaviour by the female.

I'm truly sorry that you have had such bad experiences.

But you are in a minority. Most women (in the West), marry for love and have children with their chosen partner.

Quote edited to allow posting

Hmmmm. Sorry, but in my experience it's because men fall for the first woman that doesn't have to be drunk to sleep with them. Goes back to men and women being different. Given the divorce rate, I'm hardly in a minority ( and definitely in a majority amongst farang males ), and love doesn't last long anyway. Being friends with someone is much more important for a successful marriage than being in "love", "whatever that is" ( to quote Prince Charles ).

I'll take your word for it.

I agree about "being friends", but that's a bit difficult to achieve with someone with whom you cannot communicate, let alone understand or agree with their values.

Sorry that I have to go soon, so can't continue the debate. Have just "communicated" with my Thai wife and she's waiting in the market.

[TingTawng]

Most women (in the West), marry for love

If that's really true, why aren't homeless guys just as eligible as rich guys in the west? What's a trifling thing like money and ability-to-provide ♫ got to do, got to do, got to do with it? ♫

Uuum, perhaps its cos most women aren't homeless?

Amazingly enough though, there are homeless men and women in relationships...

So what you're saying is - only a homeless woman would date a homeless man? Because? It's not because he's hard to find, that's for sure.

[lovelaos]

Most women (in the West), marry for love

If that's really true, why aren't homeless guys just as eligible as rich guys in the west? What's a trifling thing like money and ability-to-provide ♫ got to do, got to do, got to do with it? ♫

Uuum, perhaps its cos most women aren't homeless?

Amazingly enough though, there are homeless men and women in relationships...

So what you're saying is - only a homeless woman would date a homeless man? Because? It's not because he's hard to find, that's for sure.

I rest my case

[F1fanatic]

Most women (in the West), marry for love

If that's really true, why aren't homeless guys just as eligible as rich guys in the west? What's a trifling thing like money and ability-to-provide ♫ got to do, got to do, got to do with it? ♫

Uuum, perhaps its cos most women aren't homeless?

Amazingly enough though, there are homeless men and women in relationships...

So what you're saying is - only a homeless woman would date a homeless man? Because? It's not because he's hard to find, that's for sure.

Obviously . Other women are unlikely to have dealings with a homeless man.

But, I tried to help a homeless Westerner that I met here. But he still ended up committing suicide.. His problems had nothing to do with Western women, he lost all his money locally, but hey - that is nowhere near as entertaining a story - albeit tragic.

[travelmann]

I married my wife for her big T**s

[theblether]

I don't know which country you are from, but I am from the UK. I can guarantee you that many people work away from home and send money home to support their families in the UK. I would lay you odds that just about every Thaivisa member of an age has had to do so at some point in their lives. I would hazard a guess that even you have had to do so in the past too.

I'm also from the UK and I do not recognise the UK you describe. Also you're not even consistent in your comments - before you were saying how independent the west is, and how independent older people are - now you're saying they're just like Thais, relying on money from their children. So, which is to be?

I'm with you TT, you describe exactly the UK I know, TB must be talking about some sub-culture, maybe his family was from Pakistan or he was a squaddie.

I didn't know anyone in the UK that worked away from home and sent money back.

I didn't know any grandparents that looked after their daughters children while the daughter was off working in a bar.

I totally agree withTT and ludditeman.

One have to be blind not to recognise the differences in the social aspects of western and Thai culture.

In the western culture a child is prepared to be able to support him/herself, whereas in Thailand a child is prepared to support the parents. Sometimes I get the impression the child exists for this purpose alone.

This also creates a downward negative spiral; the burden of supporting the parents reduces the ability to build up a base upon which retirement would be feasible, eventually forcing them to rely on their own children for support at one point. Scary stuff.

One would also have to be blind to not recognize the similarities between Western and Thai culture too, and here we go on the magic roundabout again

The primary difference between Western culture and Thai culture now is, and I know you are not going to like this.............the different points in the respective development and urbanization of the economies.

There is virtually nothing, and I mean nothing, that you could ascribe to Thai culture that was not mirrored in the West. That includes religious and monastic imperatives, the need for families ( large families ) to ensure that people were looked after into old age etc etc etc. Urbanization and the creation of the welfare state reduced this dependence on families as your pension scheme hence there has been a rapid shift in familial relationships in the West!!!

To deny this is to deny history, look beyond your nose!!! TingTawng made a valid point about the state of life in Japan, I agree with him ( shock development huh? ) that the Japanese lifestyle is to be pitied, and I don't want to see that replicated anywhere, especially Thailand. I love Thailand just the way it is and I wish I had seen it 30 years ago.

However!! Thailand doesn't want to be an agrarian economy any more, it is on a headlong rush to industrialization and urbanization, and that will bring with it exactly the same problems that have been encountered in the West.

If you don't agree with that then up to you, only time will tell who is right and who is wrong

[theblether]

I don't know which country you are from, but I am from the UK. I can guarantee you that many people work away from home and send money home to support their families in the UK. I would lay you odds that just about every Thaivisa member of an age has had to do so at some point in their lives. I would hazard a guess that even you have had to do so in the past too.

I'm also from the UK and I do not recognise the UK you describe. Also you're not even consistent in your comments - before you were saying how independent the west is, and how independent older people are - now you're saying they're just like Thais, relying on money from their children. So, which is to be?

I'm with you TT, you describe exactly the UK I know, TB must be talking about some sub-culture, maybe his family was from Pakistan or he was a squaddie.

I didn't know anyone in the UK that worked away from home and sent money back.

I didn't know any grandparents that looked after their daughters children while the daughter was off working in a bar.

I think we've just reached the point where theblether has simply become a contrarian. A few pages back, he said that the west is full of free spirited, independent people who have been emancipated by wealth, and freed from the yoke of the family. But then - just to disagree with my most recent comment - says that the UK is like Thailand - people sending money "back home", and grandparents in full-time custody of grandchildren. The only reaction you can have to that is: <deleted>.

Or maybe his comparison is sleight of hand in that perhaps he thinks sending a one-off amount of money to mum or dad is the same as sending your pay cheque week in week out, and maybe he's comparing your grandparents baby-sitting once a week for 2 hours to being the same as your kids actually in the full-time custody of your grandparents (often the case in Thailand). Fact is - and we all know it - there are big differences between family life in Thailand and the UK.

theblether is entrenched in his views - or his convictions as he calls them - so there's not much more to say other than repeat the obvious.

I do wonder at times if your serious in your responses. I used the word convictions in regards to the amount of people prosecuted in the UK for domestic violence ( you may remember the figure was 93% male on female violence ) and for domestic murder, ( off the top of my head 82% male on female murder ). If your going to use the word convictions use it in the correct and appropriate context.

[theblether]

TingTawng said

QuoteOK, so Thai women do not consider money when dating / marrying a farang according to you.

You should have a conversation about this with theblether who believes Thai women marry farangs to escape poverty.

I think the truth lies somewhere between your "pure heart" opinion, and theblether's mercenary one.

so finally TingTawng, let's look at your childish and pejorative statement about my so called mercenary view. On my post I said...........

quote

The topic is about successful relationships in Thailand.........I think you will find that one of the most attractive attributes a Farang has to a Thai lady is..........his ability to lift her and her family from a life of poverty.

quote

I said "one of the most attractive attributes", I did not say "the only attractive attribute"

Get a grip on your stupid misrepresentation of what is said, if you are in denial that finances are not a factor in many ( again not all ) Farang/ Thai relationships then up to you.

You may find your in a small minority on this one.

[garrfeild]

HiSo= good family, rich, well-educated, best school, best university, succesful career, beautiful house(s), expensive cars, wear the right clothes, to shopping in the right shops, class.

2% have. 98% want.

Huh.... I always thought owning an iPhone makes you HiSo.

Your not far wrong with that, too many people think HiSo is related to wealth and displays of it. I think they are better known as the Nouvea Riche in the West, in too many cases they might have the cash but they ain't got the class.

IMHO class is nothing to do with wealth, it's rooted in self respect and dignity, along with respect and dignity given to others. Hence the poor as a field mouse farm girl can easily have more class in one little finger than some of the well connected so called HiSo.

The 98% figure is nonsense too, most people I know are happy to have enough to lead the lifestyle they want to enjoy. They don't seek more money, they retire early in many cases and go fishing or golfing or whatever. Money is not the be all and end of all for more people than you would believe.

On the subject of money, and going back to the OP.........one of the most common and fundamental mistakes made by farangs in this country is to lead relationships with their wallet. That is crazy and people that do that are making a rod for their own back.

To make it even worse 99% of those same guys would never ever even entertain doing that in their own country.

The following scene takes place in a bar in your own country.

"Hi my name is Mandy, I'm a divorcee, with three kids. If you want to be my boyfriend you must buy me a house, look after all my family and buy me a house in my name."

Now lets go to Thailand

"Hi my name is Mandy, I'm a hooker. If you want to be my boyfriend you must buy me a house, look after all my family and buy me a house in my name, oh and you must pay my Mom Sin Sod so you can marry me. You must do all this, it is Thai culture".

Come on, you wouldn't marry a hooker in your own country so don't do it here.

You wouldn't pay a sin sod in your own country so don't do it here.

You wouldn't buy a house in your girlfriends name in your own country so don't do it here.

You wouldn't set up a direct debit to your girlfriends family in your own country so don't do it here.

...........and if your intended says you must do this as it is Thai culture, your reply is........I'm sorry, I am farang, I do not do Thai relationship culture. If you want to be my girlfriend you must learn farang culture.

Get the rules set early and you'll have a chance, possibly a good chance of a lasting relationship. There is one thing to remember which is a good rule of thumb, if your a decent guy and you treat your Thai girl decently, she won't want to lose you.

So you equate a divorcee in which ever country with, as you say a hooker in Thailand! Your perception of women is well somewhat messed up . It might have been better had you said a relationship isn't based on money and left it at that.

[TingTawng]

Other women are unlikely to have dealings with a homeless man.

So what you're saying is - women seem to have no imagination and range when looking for a partner. They lazily look no further than their own nose, but it's also nothing to do with ability-to-provide?

Edited December 4, 2011 by TingTawng

[theblether]

HiSo= good family, rich, well-educated, best school, best university, succesful career, beautiful house(s), expensive cars, wear the right clothes, to shopping in the right shops, class.

2% have. 98% want.

Huh.... I always thought owning an iPhone makes you HiSo.

Your not far wrong with that, too many people think HiSo is related to wealth and displays of it. I think they are better known as the Nouvea Riche in the West, in too many cases they might have the cash but they ain't got the class.

IMHO class is nothing to do with wealth, it's rooted in self respect and dignity, along with respect and dignity given to others. Hence the poor as a field mouse farm girl can easily have more class in one little finger than some of the well connected so called HiSo.

The 98% figure is nonsense too, most people I know are happy to have enough to lead the lifestyle they want to enjoy. They don't seek more money, they retire early in many cases and go fishing or golfing or whatever. Money is not the be all and end of all for more people than you would believe.

On the subject of money, and going back to the OP.........one of the most common and fundamental mistakes made by farangs in this country is to lead relationships with their wallet. That is crazy and people that do that are making a rod for their own back.

To make it even worse 99% of those same guys would never ever even entertain doing that in their own country.

The following scene takes place in a bar in your own country.

"Hi my name is Mandy, I'm a divorcee, with three kids. If you want to be my boyfriend you must buy me a house, look after all my family and buy me a house in my name."

Now lets go to Thailand

"Hi my name is Mandy, I'm a hooker. If you want to be my boyfriend you must buy me a house, look after all my family and buy me a house in my name, oh and you must pay my Mom Sin Sod so you can marry me. You must do all this, it is Thai culture".

Come on, you wouldn't marry a hooker in your own country so don't do it here.

You wouldn't pay a sin sod in your own country so don't do it here.

You wouldn't buy a house in your girlfriends name in your own country so don't do it here.

You wouldn't set up a direct debit to your girlfriends family in your own country so don't do it here.

...........and if your intended says you must do this as it is Thai culture, your reply is........I'm sorry, I am farang, I do not do Thai relationship culture. If you want to be my girlfriend you must learn farang culture.

Get the rules set early and you'll have a chance, possibly a good chance of a lasting relationship. There is one thing to remember which is a good rule of thumb, if your a decent guy and you treat your Thai girl decently, she won't want to lose you.

So you equate a divorcee in which ever country with, as you say a hooker in Thailand! Your perception of women is well somewhat messed up . It might have been better had you said a relationship isn't based on money and left it at that.

Nonsense, I am demonstrating a scenario that many farangs in Thailand are familiar with. The whole point is you wouldn't entertain getting as quickly and deeply financially involved with a potential new girlfriend in the West so don't do it here.

If you have a problem with that then you should go review the thousands of stories of Westerners falling into that trap I described. Too many people ( by the way, many of whom are vulnerable people ) have been financially wiped out in a short space of time in Thailand. If one person reads this post or thread and avoids that trap then it was worth it.

Edited December 4, 2011 by theblether

[TingTawng]

To deny this is to deny history, look beyond your nose!!! TingTawng made a valid point about the state of life in Japan, I agree with him ( shock development huh? ) that the Japanese lifestyle is to be pitied, and I don't want to see that replicated anywhere, especially Thailand. I love Thailand just the way it is and I wish I had seen it 30 years ago.

However!! Thailand doesn't want to be an agrarian economy any more, it is on a headlong rush to industrialization and urbanization, and that will bring with it exactly the same problems that have been encountered in the West.

Well it's nice to see we agree about some things (seriously, I was beginning to take you for a contrarian).

However, let me spoil the love-in somewhat. I disagree that Thailand is somehow getting rid of its position as no.1 rice exporter to the world (amongst many other food exports). Actually agriculture is a huge part of Thailand's economy:-

Recent developments in agriculture have meant that since the 1960s, unemployment has fallen from over 60% to under 10% in the early 2000s.[1] In the same period: food prices halved, hunger decreased (from 2.55 million households in 1988 to 418,000 in 2007) and child malnutrition have greatly reduced (from 17% in 1987 to 7% in 2006).[1] This has been achieved (a) through a mixture of a strong and positive state role in ensuring investment in infrastructure, education and access to credit and ( successful private initiatives in the agribusiness sector.[1] This has supported Thailand's transition to a[n] industrialised economy

Link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agriculture_in_Thailand

Note that "industrialised economy" is referring in context to industrialisation of agriculture scaling up to deal with external demand.

So agriculture is actually responsible for much of the employment in Thailand, and is responsible for Thailand being the no.1 rice exporter to the world (ahead of China).

Agriculture is by far Thailand's biggest contributer to its economy.

Edited December 4, 2011 by TingTawng

[onionluke]

I am not convinced that a combine harvester driving Thai woman will have any more success in a relationship , with a farang , than your old fashioned cut it out with a scycle type . I could imagine some IT boys selling them hand held GPS gadgets to keep them in a straight line whilst harvesting .

[theblether]

To deny this is to deny history, look beyond your nose!!! TingTawng made a valid point about the state of life in Japan, I agree with him ( shock development huh? ) that the Japanese lifestyle is to be pitied, and I don't want to see that replicated anywhere, especially Thailand. I love Thailand just the way it is and I wish I had seen it 30 years ago.

However!! Thailand doesn't want to be an agrarian economy any more, it is on a headlong rush to industrialization and urbanization, and that will bring with it exactly the same problems that have been encountered in the West.

Well it's nice to see we agree about some things (seriously, I was beginning to take you for a contrarian).

However, let me spoil the love-in somewhat. I disagree that Thailand is somehow getting rid of its position as no.1 rice exporter to the world (amongst many other food exports). Actually agriculture is a huge part of Thailand's economy:-

Recent developments in agriculture have meant that since the 1960s, unemployment has fallen from over 60% to under 10% in the early 2000s.[1] In the same period: food prices halved, hunger decreased (from 2.55 million households in 1988 to 418,000 in 2007) and child malnutrition have greatly reduced (from 17% in 1987 to 7% in 2006).[1] This has been achieved (a) through a mixture of a strong and positive state role in ensuring investment in infrastructure, education and access to credit and ( successful private initiatives in the agribusiness sector.[1] This has supported Thailand's transition to a[n] industrialised economy

Link: http://en.wikipedia....ure_in_Thailand

Note that "industrialised economy" is referring in context to industrialisation of agriculture scaling up to deal with external demand.

So agriculture is actually responsible for much of the employment in Thailand, and is responsible for Thailand being the no.1 rice exporter to the world (ahead of China).

Agriculture is by far Thailand's biggest contributer to its economy.

Your too good to me

I'm not denying that agriculture will not continue to be a vastly important part of the Thai economy, but as onionluke points in in his own inimitable fashion there will be more mechanization and therefore less labour intensity. ( I know it doesn't apply to every branch of agriculture blah blah,).

The rush to urbanization and industrialization are the main factors here. We've had it in the West, it's happened at breakneck speed on the Eastern Seaboard of China, South Korea went from an agrarian economy to economic superpower in less than 40 years and you know what happened to Japan as you lived there.

You noted that the quality of life in Japan is poor, with high stress levels all round, South Korean teenagers are recognized as being the most stressed and pressurized in the world, and that other beacon of financial progress, Singapore is recognized as being another of the more stressful places on earth to live.

My point is Thailand should be careful what it asks for, because sometimes it will get it. IMHO It will not avoid the stresses and pressures that come with urbanization, and that will badly hit family life.

Incidentally on that note I see a news article on Thaivisa today that they are planning to move the factories to higher ground, so new urbanization is on it's way.

[TingTawng]

I'm not denying that agriculture will not continue to be a vastly important part of the Thai economy, but as onionluke points in in his own inimitable fashion there will be more mechanization and therefore less labour intensity. ( I know it doesn't apply to every branch of agriculture blah blah,).

That's not the point he was making - it was that industrialisation isn't going to change a woman (that's what I took from his comment anyway).

And the industrialisation of agriculture has been on-going for the last 50 years in Thailand (read my link) - it's nothing new. And it's actually the very thing that put Thailand on the map and continues to do so (not tourism, not hard drives, not the car industry which I live near (on eastern seaboard)) - BUT AGRICULTURE - perhaps I'm not being clear here but let me quote you again:-

Thailand doesn't want to be an agrarian economy any more

You know nothing to say such a thing. AGRICULTURE IS THAILAND'S BIGGEST ECONOMY AND EMPLOYER BAR NONE. It definitely does NOT want to lose its agrarian economy - it depends on it, and it's the lifeblood of Thailand.

You noted that the quality of life in Japan is poor, with high stress levels all round, South Korean teenagers are recognized as being the most stressed and pressurized in the world, and that other beacon of financial progress, Singapore is recognized as being another of the more stressful places on earth to live.

My point is Thailand should be careful what it asks for, because sometimes it will get it. IMHO It will not avoid the stresses and pressures that come with urbanization, and that will badly hit family life.

So is your beloved west suffering economic problems, stress, a poor quality of life, and a cultural vacuum (witness riots around the UK this year). Not a model for Thailand to follow, I am 100% sure you agree.

I can't see the future, but I can guess like you. I think the Thais have stronger family ties than you think they have - the last 50 years have shown this to be the case. Industrialisation is nothing new in Thailand - been happening since the 60s and the family (in Thailand) seems pretty robust in December 2011 to me.

Commodity markets do well when economies suffer since we always need food and the basics, and service markets suffer - no wonder the Thai baht is strong, and no wonder countries with no manufacturing base are suffering. Thailand is a commodity rich country with good infrastructure for exports and has a surprising export scale given its modest size of country and population.

Incidentally on that note I see a news article on Thaivisa today that they are planning to move the factories to higher ground, so new urbanization is on it's way.

So - you mean they're moving factories, not "new urbanization".

Edited December 4, 2011 by TingTawng