Is Your Wife/Partner An X Bar Girl? My Hand Is Up.

[hotandhumid]

I don't have a problem with it at all, a lot of my pals have married a brass. What I think I would find diffulcult though is that if I married a bar girl it would always be at the back of my mind that i've married someone who spread her legs for a living, and more than likely a few fat smelly germans had been up there before you, and you married it! Also, when you have a big row it is always too easy to throw in the 'remember where I found you line' or something similar, which wouldn't be fair on her to have that thrown in her face. An then there's the issue of what you say to your family/pals back home, youa re either honest and say 'yep, I maarried a brass' or you lie and wonder what they are saying behind your back. Another way I l also look at it is if you stayed in your home country would have you married a brass? I think not, so why do it anywhere else?

For the record, my missus is a nurse.

H&H

[gburns57au]

bar girls are not a disease like some people like to think

Perhaps not' date=' but result from my survey is that 50% are infested with diseases,

i rest my case

[/quote']

I would be interested to know how many BGs you have taken for testing?

I would suggest none, and that you are merely propagating nonsense.

I have taken 3 BGs to a local hospital, paid for the results, none of them had any disease.

Two of my friends have done the same, one with 4 girls, one with 3 girls, no disease.

So my personal survey of 10 BGs has found them disease free, a small sample but a significant result.

For the purpose of scientific medical field research, i did test 10, out of which 5 gave me gonorrhea.

My studies for the greater of man kind is thereby over with.

I am done

Try using protection

[HardenedSoul]

I wonder if there is one single guy out there (except of course HardenedSoul) who never had problems engaging with attractive women. I certainly had and still have, although I am very attractive, highly intelligent, good body, oh yeah, and rich. Some attractive women simply don't dig me! Unbelievable but true! Maybe it's my lack of modesty.

Just a question to HardenedSoul: Do you believe that if this pathetic guy would have married an ordinary Thai girl, who has never been a bargirl, their chances of success would be higher?

And how would you rate the behavior of an average married farang guy who pays his wife a monthly allowance, makes her presents and thus gets her affection, loyalty and respect while he has a certain degree of "influence" on her acquaintances? In other words, isn't that the totally normal behavior of any husband anywhere in the world? And how is that different from the situation where she used to work as a bar girl? Right! It isn't.

I think we should stop looking at bar girls like they were a different species with different behavior. The only difference I see between a bar girl and a "normal" girl is that the bar girls do it more in the open. But they all "take" in one way or another. And that's OK. We men are supposed to be providers and the women are in the village taking care of the offspring and thus cannot hunt, they depend on men giving them. We all are products of evolution.

In answer to your question, The farang guy I alluded to in my example probably wouldn't have a higher chance of success if he married an ordinary Thai girl who'd never worked in a bar. The reasons? His mentality - NOT hers. The type of man who sees a woman as a possession, someone to be maintained by way of financial or material incentive rather than by virtue of his consideration, empathy and respect is destined to find his encounters with all women shortlived and, invariably, painful . . . unless, of course, he modifies his behaviour.

Any farang man unable to pursue successful relationships with women in his homeland will most likely find himself similarly hamstrung in Thailand. Even if he does find a Thai partner willing to stand still with him for a while, no amount of money or material largesse is likely to win her genuine affection, loyalty or respect if his mindset compels him to exert control over her life so NO, IT ISN'T normal behaviour. Men who conduct relationships in this manner are nearly always terrified of losing their "possession" and constantly see other men as a threat.

I've lost count of the number of Thai girls (not bargirls) I've met who've had a mobile phone complete with new SIM card bought for them by a jealous, possessive farang guy so that details of phone calls/SMS made/sent or received can be checked via the handset or online. Needless to say, it never stops them acquiring another handset/SIM before working out their frustrations in my company . . . even when the gormless oafs call pre, mid or post-session.

Even those Thai girls who genuinely believe that a man's jealousy verifies the authenticity of his love (a surprisingly high number do) will eventually grow to resent the sacrifices she must make to endure said "love".

A confident, self-assured man fully at ease with his strengths AND weaknesses will win and retain his woman's heartfelt affections, earn her respect and secure her loyalty without needing to spend continually or adorn her with trinkets.

You are right though; bargirls aren't a different species but they do have a predilection for the party, the bottle and the cash. I'm not sure that the effort required to reveal the potentially sweet, compassionate individual beneath the hellraising exterior would be warranted especially when you never know how many of the guys you pass on the soi have had her screaming at the ceiling in the past.

[Geekfreaklover]

I recall from reading the OP's past post that life hasn't been a bed of roses and I am interested in this sudden turnaround of heart.

Basically marrying a working girl is not something I'd encourage anyone to do. In, fact getting married is not something I'd encourage any one to do. Having spent many years observing these marriages and having had one myself I would say the success rate is about ten percent. By success I mean a realtionship where both partners respect each other and nothing is hinged on money.

I've had enough of the sob stories too. Thailand has food. It's falling off the branches and swimming in the rivers. These people do not starve. Most farangs think that are helping a third world family by marrying into them, when what they are usually doing is just feeding a greedy monster.

[Berkshire]

I think most farang/bg marriages fail because of the type of farang the Bg's marry!

You just have to admit bg's aren't the "Cream of Thai Society"...and neither are their customers

RAZZ

Very provocative. I've never thought of it that way. Perhaps the reason that so many farang/BG marriages fail is because of the farang in the equation, not the BG. Fruit for thought.

[scorpio]

scropio please refrain from creating fake threads about me wanting to get married quick and answer me. How did you tell your family and friends that your wife spread her legs for 30$ a pop? You said you were proud of her being a bar girl. If you havnt told everyone then you're ashamed. This thread isnt about me, im just a young guy with a young chick whos giving you a reality check. you dont need to know more.

as i said before i have no problem with desperate people marrying bargirls. But these thread where you act proud and unashamed are just pure annoying bs.

your last thread, if you go back and look, clearly says you were in a hurry to get married in thailand, why? and to whom? maybe your little tee rak has allready fkd you right up and left you well scorched lol those who marry in haste lol you know the proverb? your the bstter! !! Btw if you think the thread is annoying bs then do 1, easy :-)

[gburns57au]

Previously dated farm girl, vet and paying off education working for the dept of pollution, Thai girl in Oz, two bar girls. first trip to LOS in 1993 so not a newbie. Spent time in rural areas as well as tourist areas.

Farm girl was the most materialistic

Vet would not be involved in anyone who earnt less than her

Thai girl in Oz was mentally unstable

One BG was very insecure and went to the UK.

My wife is 17 years younger with a son, the only scare of disease was an abnormal pap smear test which affects 750,000 US women per year(clear now). We have been together since 2004 and married for 4.5 years, she has been here for 4 years. She is not highly educated but after school here speaks reasonable english. As far as I know she hasnt been unfaithful but then I couldnt tell you if my ex farang wife was faithful or not, however it doesnt seem to be in her make up. 2 years ago I was diagnosed with terminal cancer, there is no thought of her bailing out in her mind even though she knows that our future is limited and some parts of our life have changed. I am not rich but we live a comfortable lifestyle. She can mix with people from all levels of society even attending a revue night with lawyers and judges attending. Shes had a bottle of Jacks in the cupboard untouched for 3+ months

She was BG number 2......She worked daytime in a bar but still went with guys that she chose to go with and was paid for her time.

So I guess I found a pretty good one.....mind you it took 11 years to find the "right" one with a few false starts along the way, it then another 3 years to get to know her including bringing her here about 4 times.

There is nothing wrong with marrying a BG.....just take the time to get to know them first....too many farang go and fall for the first girl they see (sleep with) and then try make a relationship out of it.

Edited December 3, 2011 by gburns57au

[luckizuchinni]

Yes she has a temper and you have to run from her.. Cant wait to hear the story when the money stops or when she meets a richer person or when she starts hitting the children because they cost too much of her beer money allowance. Even if she's faithfull, she is a bargirl. Her character and non-existent virtues will be transferred to your children. I would never have children or date a bargirl even if she was hotter than jessica alba, had a PH.D and could take care of me financially. It's not about pride or the job, its about the character of the person. a working girl is a working girl.

They deserve the same things we do but personally i don't want to have my energy sucked out by someone who thinks spreading her legs for money and getting drunk every night is a way to appreciate the beauty of this world and the good charm of life we were given.

Sincerly hope we dont see you on stickman or bangkokpost for having had your penis cut up by magic and eaten by buffalo while you were flying off a balcony in pattaya

I don't know you, so I am not accusing one way or the other. But I have to ask, have you ever in your life paid for sex? If so, do you think you can be good husband material?

FOr every bar girl, there are more men who are willing to play that game. And just as I would hate to dam_n each and every one of those men to failed marriages, I would also hate to dam_n any bargirl to a failed marriage, too.

[luckizuchinni]

I don't have a problem with it at all, a lot of my pals have married a brass. What I think I would find diffulcult though is that if I married a bar girl it would always be at the back of my mind that i've married someone who spread her legs for a living, and more than likely a few fat smelly germans had been up there before you, and you married it! Also, when you have a big row it is always too easy to throw in the 'remember where I found you line' or something similar, which wouldn't be fair on her to have that thrown in her face. An then there's the issue of what you say to your family/pals back home, youa re either honest and say 'yep, I maarried a brass' or you lie and wonder what they are saying behind your back. Another way I l also look at it is if you stayed in your home country would have you married a brass? I think not, so why do it anywhere else?

For the record, my missus is a nurse.

H&H

I've known a couple of nurses who have turned a few tricks.

What's your point?

i haven't got a point. Just stating that I knew a couple of nurses who turned tricks.

You don't have to have a name badge with "Bar Girl" to sell your mutton for money.

As has been said before, many students, masseuses - and even nurses - have financed their life-style by selling their bodies.

I knew an attractive Chula girl who was going for her masters who helped pay the bills with a weekly assignation. How do I know this? Well, yes, I was one of her occasional companions, and while she still took her "gift" each time, she also liked to give me her schoolwork to check.

She has long since graduated, took a good job, and to my knowledge, doesn't play that game anymore. So technically, she may have been a working girl, but she probably is a good wife now to someone.

Edited December 3, 2011 by luckizuchinni

[MRTELLYOUSTRAIGHT]

Is Your Wife/Partner An X Bar Girl? YES

Is Your Wife/Partner An X Bar Girl? NO

[dominique355]

I wonder if there is one single guy out there (except of course HardenedSoul) who never had problems engaging with attractive women. I certainly had and still have, although I am very attractive, highly intelligent, good body, oh yeah, and rich. Some attractive women simply don't dig me! Unbelievable but true! Maybe it's my lack of modesty.

Just a question to HardenedSoul: Do you believe that if this pathetic guy would have married an ordinary Thai girl, who has never been a bargirl, their chances of success would be higher?

And how would you rate the behavior of an average married farang guy who pays his wife a monthly allowance, makes her presents and thus gets her affection, loyalty and respect while he has a certain degree of "influence" on her acquaintances? In other words, isn't that the totally normal behavior of any husband anywhere in the world? And how is that different from the situation where she used to work as a bar girl? Right! It isn't.

I think we should stop looking at bar girls like they were a different species with different behavior. The only difference I see between a bar girl and a "normal" girl is that the bar girls do it more in the open. But they all "take" in one way or another. And that's OK. We men are supposed to be providers and the women are in the village taking care of the offspring and thus cannot hunt, they depend on men giving them. We all are products of evolution.

In answer to your question, The farang guy I alluded to in my example probably wouldn't have a higher chance of success if he married an ordinary Thai girl who'd never worked in a bar. The reasons? His mentality - NOT hers. The type of man who sees a woman as a possession, someone to be maintained by way of financial or material incentive rather than by virtue of his consideration, empathy and respect is destined to find his encounters with all women shortlived and, invariably, painful . . . unless, of course, he modifies his behaviour.

Any farang man unable to pursue successful relationships with women in his homeland will most likely find himself similarly hamstrung in Thailand. Even if he does find a Thai partner willing to stand still with him for a while, no amount of money or material largesse is likely to win her genuine affection, loyalty or respect if his mindset compels him to exert control over her life so NO, IT ISN'T normal behaviour. Men who conduct relationships in this manner are nearly always terrified of losing their "possession" and constantly see other men as a threat.

I've lost count of the number of Thai girls (not bargirls) I've met who've had a mobile phone complete with new SIM card bought for them by a jealous, possessive farang guy so that details of phone calls/SMS made/sent or received can be checked via the handset or online. Needless to say, it never stops them acquiring another handset/SIM before working out their frustrations in my company . . . even when the gormless oafs call pre, mid or post-session.

Even those Thai girls who genuinely believe that a man's jealousy verifies the authenticity of his love (a surprisingly high number do) will eventually grow to resent the sacrifices she must make to endure said "love".

A confident, self-assured man fully at ease with his strengths AND weaknesses will win and retain his woman's heartfelt affections, earn her respect and secure her loyalty without needing to spend continually or adorn her with trinkets.

You are right though; bargirls aren't a different species but they do have a predilection for the party, the bottle and the cash. I'm not sure that the effort required to reveal the potentially sweet, compassionate individual beneath the hellraising exterior would be warranted especially when you never know how many of the guys you pass on the soi have had her screaming at the ceiling in the past.

I would agree with most of what you say here, except the part where you talk about the woman's heartfelt affection etc. I may be an old cynic but it seems to me that you see the world (and women in particular) a bit too idealistic.

87.3% of all divorces are because of financial problems. Even a self-assured man fully at ease with his strength and weaknesses will lose his wife's affection and respect when he is to stingy, when he cannot provide. These are the sad facts or experiences of life.

And all women are like that, no matter their origin or background. But, as I said before, I am an old cynic, but am also hopelessly optimistic and maybe you have found this one woman who proves me wrong.

[richard_smith237]

If you had a choice between three women of identical looks, character, intelligence etc...

One was a Lawyer, One was a teacher, One was a Bar Girl... Would anyone choose the Bar Girl ?

I guess the issue here is that making the above comparison is like comparing apples and oranges...

While there are many reasons a girl ends up selling herself, there are far fewer reasons why men end up marrying them.

I suspect one of the main reasons is simply lack of viable alternative for companionship...

Others think a BG is a viable source of companionship... I suspect that the reality is that the BG is the only source of companionship remaining.... He was paying, she was taking payment, both are hardly morally virtuous. Building a foundation of trust from this is am impressive feat.

[drdaveperry]

Hanlon's Razor

is an adage

that reads: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

[thaiIand]

scropio please refrain from creating fake threads about me wanting to get married quick and answer me. How did you tell your family and friends that your wife spread her legs for 30$ a pop? You said you were proud of her being a bar girl. If you havnt told everyone then you're ashamed. This thread isnt about me, im just a young guy with a young chick whos giving you a reality check. you dont need to know more.

as i said before i have no problem with desperate people marrying bargirls. But these thread where you act proud and unashamed are just pure annoying bs.

your last thread, if you go back and look, clearly says you were in a hurry to get married in thailand, why? and to whom? maybe your little tee rak has allready fkd you right up and left you well scorched lol those who marry in haste lol you know the proverb? your the bstter! !! Btw if you think the thread is annoying bs then do 1, easy :-)

thats not me, i am thaiiand with a capital i not L.

I never made any such thread, we have traveled half way across the world(something a bargirl cant do) and have kids, no problem here.

this is the link to my last threads: http://www.thaivisa....ge__tab__topics

nothing about getting married.

guess you're as drunk as your working girl if you cant click on my name and click 'topics'

Edited December 3, 2011 by thaiIand

[GuestHouse]

I have absolutely no problem with guys marrying prostitutes - Their life, their choice and besides I've known one guy who did just that and wound up living a very happy life.

I do however have a problem with guys who having moved their social/sex/romantic life into paying for sex/company from prostitutes claiming that all women are prostitutes.

Appart from being a blatant fallacy, it clearly a rationalisation of their own behaviour.

If they are happy and see nothing wrong with their choices they need offer no justification.

Edited December 3, 2011 by GuestHouse

[cardholder]

I have absolutely no problem with guys marrying prostitutes - Their life, their choice and besides I've known one guy who did just that and wound up living a very happy life.

I do however have a problem with guys who having moved their social/sex/romantic life into paying for sex/company from prostitutes claiming that all women are prostitutes.

Appart from being a blatant fallacy, it clearly a rationalisation of their own behaviour.

If they are happy and see nothing wrong with their choices they need offer no justification.

I don't think anyone could claim that "all women are prostitutes".

I think the phrase that I have heard (often by those with ex-BG partners) is that 'everyone pays for sex, one way or another'.

I would use neither. You make your choice/s in life and if these bring happiness then you are blessed. Your respective 'pasts' are only relevant for the impact they have had in shaping what you are now.

[GuestHouse]

I don't think anyone could claim that "all women are prostitutes".

Refer Wallaby Post 189

All women are prostitutes, it's only the price the varies.

[cardholder]

I don't think anyone could claim that "all women are prostitutes".

Refer Wallaby Post 189

All women are prostitutes, it's only the price the varies.

I have to say that I don't share his view.

[GuestHouse]

I don't think anyone could claim that "all women are prostitutes".

Refer Wallaby Post 189

All women are prostitutes, it's only the price the varies.

I have to say that I don't share his view.

I don't think anyone with a normal balance of mind and personality does.

[Ulysses G.]

If you had a choice between three women of identical looks, character, intelligence etc...

One was a Lawyer, One was a teacher, One was a Bar Girl... Would anyone choose the Bar Girl ?

That is never going to happen, but if the bar girl was better looking, had a better character, was more intelligent and had a better personality who wouldn't choose her? If she was good to me and I wanted a commited relationship, I could care less how many times she had been pronged before I met her.

Edited December 3, 2011 by Ulysses G.

[cardholder]

If you had a choice between three women of identical looks, character, intelligence etc...

One was a Lawyer, One was a teacher, One was a Bar Girl... Would anyone choose the Bar Girl ?

That is never going to happen, but if the bar girl was better looking, had a better character, wasmore intelligent and had a better personality who wouldn't choose her? If she was good to me and I wanted a commited relationship, I could care less how many times she had been pronged before I met her.

That was the choice I made.

Although I have to admit that I don't recall seeing any lawyers or teachers in Pattaya Soi 8 !!

[travelmann]

I dont care if your wife is a 1 legged pygmy transexual budgie, sheesh this is a load of crap!

[thaimate]

Most bar girls ive known and Hookers in the UK ,(no not as a customer and dont ask how i knew them ) did it for one thing ,money ,easy money without having to work hard for it ,now while i have absolutely no problem with their way of earning money ,it really makes me laugh at the excuses made for them ,like having to look after the familly ,ect, do as others do girls ,get a job or be honest about why you do it and to you guys who make excuses for them ,get real.Hookers can settle down and get married ,but its not many that make good wives after being shafted by all and sundry.

[metisdead]

Some profanity posts have been removed. An insulting and baiting post has been removed as well as the session that ensued.

[theblether]

If you had a choice between three women of identical looks, character, intelligence etc...

One was a Lawyer, One was a teacher, One was a Bar Girl... Would anyone choose the Bar Girl ?

That is never going to happen, but if the bar girl was better looking, had a better character, was more intelligent and had a better personality who wouldn't choose her? If she was good to me and I wanted a commited relationship, I could care less how many times she had been pronged before I met her.

Very good and in a strange way so romantic

[sham69]

I have bedded many married woman who were never bg's in Thailand (so they told me and their husbands) they are by far the best in the sack when the old man is away at work or when she is out with her mates.

[theblether]

If you had a choice between three women of identical looks, character, intelligence etc...

One was a Lawyer, One was a teacher, One was a Bar Girl... Would anyone choose the Bar Girl ?

That is never going to happen, but if the bar girl was better looking, had a better character, was more intelligent and had a better personality who wouldn't choose her? If she was good to me and I wanted a commited relationship, I could care less how many times she had been pronged before I met her.

On a related note........who really wants to investigate the sexual history of their potential girlfriend/wife? equally who really wants to tell your own sexual history to your potential wife / girlfriend? I know some willing amateurs that would make many prostitutes blush with their antics.

Some things are left better unsaid.

[rgs2001uk]

If you had a choice between three women of identical looks, character, intelligence etc...

One was a Lawyer, One was a teacher, One was a Bar Girl... Would anyone choose the Bar Girl ?

That is never going to happen, but if the bar girl was better looking, had a better character, was more intelligent and had a better personality who wouldn't choose her? If she was good to me and I wanted a commited relationship, I could care less how many times she had been pronged before I met her.

On a related note........who really wants to investigate the sexual history of their potential girlfriend/wife? equally who really wants to tell your own sexual history to your potential wife / girlfriend? I know some willing amateurs that would make many prostitutes blush with their antics.

Some things are left better unsaid.

Yes but the willing amateurs are usually free, prostitutes by definition aint.

Never had an amateur ask me for money in the morning before I left to go to the shops for a pint of milk and loaf of bread.

As others have mentioned, how do you define a "working girl" , had a teacher tell me that if I paid the cost of her MBA I could move in with her, that would have cost me 100k baht.

There used to be a bar on soi Cowboy full of uni students from Ram, Dino snooker hall in Prakhanong (Suk 71) is also full of uni students, they dont go by the name of sopanee, but are known as markee or prettee.

[Boo]

Just checking in...yep the same old delusions & arrogance alive & kicking on thaivisa.

[endure]

I wonder if the OP's wife knows he's parading her past history for a bunch of strangers to read about? I bet he'd be seeing a bit more of that fiery temper if she found out