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How Do Parents Feel When Their Son ( Or Daughter ) Is Gay

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Of the people I know well enough in Thailand to discuss the topic most agree they're less likely to willingly accept homosexuality in their own children, but are much more accepting of gays otherwise. My own personal guess would be that they feel they failed, made some mistake in child rearing or created a child with defects, but those can be common beliefs in most any country. I'd also say they were all mistaken thoughts, too.

For a while I'd wondered if the blanket rejection of a gay child there had to do with the "Westernization" of the families involved, but that didn't seem to fit. You know - the influence of Western culture, religions and other pig-headed ignorance that passes for logical thinking within some groups.

Not many of my gay Thai friends are "out" to their families, but I'm glad that some can be. Most are afraid of rejection, and with family being such a big part of life there I can't blame them for being skittish about it. In a presentation I heard 20 years ago by speaker Brian McNaught he proposed that we gay people carry a secret, and that is "if you knew I was gay you wouldn't love me any more". That's a very, very powerful fear.

If my children came to me and said they were gay I'd be so thankful that I could help share, inform, support and perhaps smooth the way for them a bit. Parents who reject their children for being gay are more than foolish, in my opinion. I'd go so far as to say shameful, but the world is changing, little by little, so there's hope.

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I think it's time for me to jump in here as a mod and remind our straight guests that insinuations that gays are not normal, are 'weak', etc. are not permitted here; they are a form of gay-bashing stereotype. To those of you whose posts were deleted: you clearly know little about gay people and I feel sorry for your children if any of them are gay, because you will obviously be completely taken by surprise and unprepared if they are. Most likely if they were, they would have already learned this about you and you will probably not find out about their real lives until many years after they have left your home, if ever. A very sad prognosis.

Sam- check the subforum guidelines; otherwise, I'm not interested and this is the last implied warning.

Since my implied hints and last warnings were not enough, I am now closing this thread.

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