25 And Thinking Of Looking To Thailand For A Wife.

[jefisme03]

Is it reasonable to think of bringing a girl over to the states I know id have to make trips to see her but I'm worried that she wouldn't be happy being far away from her family. I also wonder if i am too young to be appealing.

[stoneyboy]

Are you wealthy ?

[endure]

Remins me of someone I used to sail with:

"I've got my Mate's ticket and a sports car. Next on the list is a wife"

[necronx99]

Remins me of someone I used to sail with:

"I've got my Mate's ticket and a sports car. Next on the list is a wife"

I could think of at least 3 other things I would put directly after sports car..

[David48]

Just a word to the future willing posters to this thread.

We have a newbie, who has joined a few hours ago and posting a very open ended question.

Think back to when you first posted ... would you have written something like this?

Almost no detail (no time and no effort) from him as to why he is considering the initial question, yet asking everything in the way of advice for us.

'i am too young to be appealing' ... oh please!

Just saying ...

[jefisme03]

Thanks for the answers I like asking open ended questions when starting in a board to get a feel for the forum. I am not necessarily wealthy but i have a good thing going at this point starting to by a house i have a car good job finishing college. I figure I should start learning now as this will be a years long ordeal. American women haven't been appealing for their spoiled nature. Honestly it seems like this would be the best way to find a woman who has at least some usefulness.

[necronx99]

Thanks for the answers I like asking open ended questions when starting in a board to get a feel for the forum. I am not necessarily wealthy but i have a good thing going at this point starting to by a house i have a car good job finishing college. I figure I should start learning now as this will be a years long ordeal. American women haven't been appealing for their spoiled nature. Honestly it seems like this would be the best way to find a woman who has at least some usefulness.

Getting married is usually something that happens, not a goal to be achieved.

Why would you want to get married at 25?

[jefisme03]

Well I'm pretty sure that there Isn't* an actual rational explanation to that answer but mostly that I want to get settled early I've been on enough adventures for a while. if im going to have kids id like to do it while I'm young so I can properly raise them. I like in the middle of Tulsa Oklahoma and honestly the locals are less than impressive when it comes to personality.

Edited April 9, 2012 by jefisme03

[necronx99]

Well I'm pretty sure that there Isn't* an actual rational explanation to that answer but mostly that I want to get settled early I've been on enough adventures for a while. if im going to have kids id like to do it while I'm young so I can properly raise them. I like in the middle of Tulsa Oklahoma and honestly the locals are less than impressive when it comes to personality.

Well Jeff, it's entirely feasible to come over to LOS, find some sweet thing, marry her and wisk her back stateside. happens all the time.

What's divorce law like in Tulsa and do you know anything about vetinary science as it pertians to water buffalo?

Edited April 9, 2012 by necronx99

[kaspercat]

I also got tired of the selections in the states while I was in my early 20's. I ended up selling everything and moving to Thailand.

I would recommend to moving here. If you bring her to the states, people changes and it will be no different than selecting an American-Thai there.

The living environment here is actually quite good.

[jefisme03]

The only kind of buffalo we have here are the land kind but no alas i am but a simple computer guy tho i could learn just about anything.

[steve187]

Thanks for the answers I like asking open ended questions when starting in a board to get a feel for the forum. I am not necessarily wealthy but i have a good thing going at this point starting to by a house i have a car good job finishing college. I figure I should start learning now as this will be a years long ordeal. American women haven't been appealing for their spoiled nature. Honestly it seems like this would be the best way to find a woman who has at least some usefulness.

Getting married is usually something that happens, not a goal to be achieved.

Why would you want to get married at 25?

I got married at 25, a new job and a move away from home 100 miles, I thought I was old enough, she was a lovely lass, did it last... yes about a year, so that was wife number one gone...

still lots of growing/things to do as a single man at 25, think again at 35.

[TommoPhysicist]

Thanks for the answers I like asking open ended questions when starting in a board to get a feel for the forum. I am not necessarily wealthy but i have a good thing going at this point starting to by a house i have a car good job finishing college. I figure I should start learning now as this will be a years long ordeal. American women haven't been appealing for their spoiled nature. Honestly it seems like this would be the best way to find a woman who has at least some usefulness.

Here is some advice for you.

NEVER date a woman (from any country) unless she has her own home.

Rented or purchased, not important.

NEVER allow her to give up her own home and move in with you.

Else it will soon be her home, and you will be homeless.

Importing a woman from another country wouldn't be a good idea, as she would soon be owning your home.

Not so important if you are renting a place, of course.

[jefisme03]

Thanks for the answers I like asking open ended questions when starting in a board to get a feel for the forum. I am not necessarily wealthy but i have a good thing going at this point starting to by a house i have a car good job finishing college. I figure I should start learning now as this will be a years long ordeal. American women haven't been appealing for their spoiled nature. Honestly it seems like this would be the best way to find a woman who has at least some usefulness.

Here is some advice for you.

NEVER date a woman (from any country) unless she has her own home.

Rented or purchased, not important.

NEVER allow her to give up her own home and move in with you.

Else it will soon be her home, and you will be homeless.

Importing a woman from another country wouldn't be a good idea, as she would soon be owning your home.

Not so important if you are renting a place, of course.

What makes you say this I'm fairly compitent when maintaining legal documentation and being safe around women who have nefarious intentions.

[jefisme03]

Thanks for the answers I like asking open ended questions when starting in a board to get a feel for the forum. I am not necessarily wealthy but i have a good thing going at this point starting to by a house i have a car good job finishing college. I figure I should start learning now as this will be a years long ordeal. American women haven't been appealing for their spoiled nature. Honestly it seems like this would be the best way to find a woman who has at least some usefulness.

Getting married is usually something that happens, not a goal to be achieved.

Why would you want to get married at 25?

I got married at 25, a new job and a move away from home 100 miles, I thought I was old enough, she was a lovely lass, did it last... yes about a year, so that was wife number one gone...

still lots of growing/things to do as a single man at 25, think again at 35.

35 is a bit too old for me and besides I'm wise beyond my years. Compare me to most of the adults I know and I have my head on straight hence the research before I just threw $4000 in to goting to thailand for a week or 2. I usually take the whole "you are immature" line to mean that the person who is saying it was foolish at my age is trying to say "I was foolish at that age.". When I was 19 I was told I wasn't ready for college now im almost graduated. I have learned never to listen when I am told I am unable to do something.

[transam]

Thanks for the answers I like asking open ended questions when starting in a board to get a feel for the forum. I am not necessarily wealthy but i have a good thing going at this point starting to by a house i have a car good job finishing college. I figure I should start learning now as this will be a years long ordeal. American women haven't been appealing for their spoiled nature. Honestly it seems like this would be the best way to find a woman who has at least some usefulness.

Getting married is usually something that happens, not a goal to be achieved.

Why would you want to get married at 25?

I got married at 25, a new job and a move away from home 100 miles, I thought I was old enough, she was a lovely lass, did it last... yes about a year, so that was wife number one gone...

still lots of growing/things to do as a single man at 25, think again at 35.

35 is a bit too old for me and besides I'm wise beyond my years. Compare me to most of the adults I know and I have my head on straight hence the research before I just threw $4000 in to goting to thailand for a week or 2. I usually take the whole "you are immature" line to mean that the person who is saying it was foolish at my age is trying to say "I was foolish at that age.". When I was 19 I was told I wasn't ready for college now im almost graduated. I have learned never to listen when I am told I am unable to do something.

Hmmm, but l think your heading to disaster if you need to look to LOS for a lady.

[IsaanUSA]

There are plenty of Asian ladies in your area. You need to move to Oklahoma City, Stillwater or Norman. Enroll in some courses at the university. Get a job at a Thai restaurant.

Marrying a student is a thousand times easier/better than marrying a gal living in Thailand.

1. Visa/green card situation is much better. For the overseas gal you will have to wait 6-10 months before she can even come over.

2. She is already familiar with our culture and will feel more comfortable

3. She comes from a family with some money if she's going to college here

4. Better English language skills

5. She already has a desire (or somebody in her family does) for her to be in the USA

6. You save a TON of money marrying a girl that's already here

7. You save a TON of hearthache marrying a girl that's already here

8. You have the ability to date and live together in the US while you're working, and there's no commitment.

Biggest advice for dating a Thai in your area (I'm talking the OP's area) is to not make any enemies, hurt feelings, or say anything bad about them. The Thais talk about you when you're not around and word will get around that you did XYZ or you only like her for sex or whatever.

Also if she (a foreign student) starts getting serious with you, then she is probably looking (expecting) to get married. So make sure you have good communication with her and she knows what you are thinking. She could be expecting to get married, and then living in the US with you. But if you string her along and at the last moment tell her you don't want to get married, well she is going to be pissed off and then have to go back to Thailand forever with a broken heart.

EDIT: Whoops, I forgot OKC. Even more Asians there numbers wise, but Stillwater has more Asians per capita.

Edited April 10, 2012 by IsaanUSA

[IsaanUSA]

Hmmm, but l think your heading to disaster if you need to look to LOS for a lady.

Agreed. Why the need for Thailand? Plenty of sexy Latina girls!

I know what you're saying about being 25. The Bible Belt has trained you well

Edited April 10, 2012 by IsaanUSA

[KeyserSoze01]

35 is a bit too old for me and besides I'm wise beyond my years. Compare me to most of the adults I know and I have my head on straight hence the research before I just threw $4000 in to goting to thailand for a week or 2. I usually take the whole "you are immature" line to mean that the person who is saying it was foolish at my age is trying to say "I was foolish at that age.". When I was 19 I was told I wasn't ready for college now im almost graduated. I have learned never to listen when I am told I am unable to do something.

If you were wise beyond your years, you wouldn't be here asking very naive questions about finding a wife in Thailand.

My advice is to spend the cash and take your 2 week holiday to Thailand as so many have done before you. The path is well worn and the Thais make indoctrination of newbies rather painless. You will catch jasmine fever, screw everything in sight and fall in love with the country and people. The LAST thing you should do is to set off on some mission to find a bride to take back to the west. The internet and this forum are littered with horror stories of this nature. So read a few thousand of these stories to learn the ropes and enjoy your time in Thailand for what it is.

As far as getting married, it is an outdated social construct which has run it's course. The only reason for getting married is if you want to have children. Even then, with the failure rate of marriages in the west where both parties have common ancestry, culture, philosophies and goals, it is a losing bet to try and "import" a foreign model with the hopes that she will be different. With the vast difference in Thai / farang cultures, you are fighting the odds. The only "good" Thai / farang relationships I know of are where the foreigner (you) moved to Thailand and adopted their mates way of life.

I do know how you feel as I was 27 when I got married the first time. You feel that the clock is ticking and you need to find a mate to spend the rest of your life with. My only advice here is to not rush into anything, build some wealth while you are young, travel and enjoy all that this world has to offer.

[cardholder]

Come to Thailand on regular holidays to sample the wares.

Don't get bitten on the arse and then come back for real in about 25 years when the house is paid for and you have cash in the bank.

You will have no trouble finding a wife.

[IsaanUSA]

As far as getting married, it is an outdated social construct which has run it's course. The only reason for getting married is if you want to have children. Even then, with the failure rate of marriages in the west where both parties have common ancestry, culture, philosophies and goals, it is a losing bet to try and "import" a foreign model with the hopes that she will be different.

Obviously never been to Oklahoma.

Regarding American ladies and their spoiled nature...I agree, however the Thais are very spoiled as well. American women expect everything, while most Thai ladies only expect like 87%. But Thai ladies generally have a high sanook factor, and that is very nice.

Have you talked with your family about this? Does your family approve of you marrying a non-believer? Will you raise your children Christian, Buddhist or no religion? Does your family approve of that?

Edited April 10, 2012 by IsaanUSA

[jefisme03]

Hmmm, but l think your heading to disaster if you need to look to LOS for a lady.

i get these sorts of answers and they usually mean it would of been a disaster when I was 25. im looking more at the logistics of it all. the incling i get is that any thai woman that is willing to move out of country is the kind that has loose ties with their family and probably have their priorities all wrong.

[jefisme03]

There are plenty of Asian ladies in your area. You need to move to Oklahoma City, Stillwater or Norman. Enroll in some courses at the university. Get a job at a Thai restaurant.

Marrying a student is a thousand times easier/better than marrying a gal living in Thailand.

1. Visa/green card situation is much better. For the overseas gal you will have to wait 6-10 months before she can even come over.

2. She is already familiar with our culture and will feel more comfortable

3. She comes from a family with some money if she's going to college here

4. Better English language skills

5. She already has a desire (or somebody in her family does) for her to be in the USA

6. You save a TON of money marrying a girl that's already here

7. You save a TON of hearthache marrying a girl that's already here

8. You have the ability to date and live together in the US while you're working, and there's no commitment.

Biggest advice for dating a Thai in your area (I'm talking the OP's area) is to not make any enemies, hurt feelings, or say anything bad about them. The Thais talk about you when you're not around and word will get around that you did XYZ or you only like her for sex or whatever.

Also if she (a foreign student) starts getting serious with you, then she is probably looking (expecting) to get married. So make sure you have good communication with her and she knows what you are thinking. She could be expecting to get married, and then living in the US with you. But if you string her along and at the last moment tell her you don't want to get married, well she is going to be pissed off and then have to go back to Thailand forever with a broken heart.

EDIT: Whoops, I forgot OKC. Even more Asians there numbers wise, but Stillwater has more Asians per capita.

while most of this information is certainly true it seems like it would be hard to just get acquainted with an Asian girl with out her knowing thats specifically what i am looking for.

Edited April 10, 2012 by jefisme03

[jefisme03]

Hmmm, but l think your heading to disaster if you need to look to LOS for a lady.

Agreed. Why the need for Thailand? Plenty of sexy Latina girls!

I know what you're saying about being 25. The Bible Belt has trained you well

A lot of what i am trying to do is escape much of the american misandry that seems to prevail its not skin color im worried about its mind set.

Edited April 10, 2012 by jefisme03

[jefisme03]

35 is a bit too old for me and besides I'm wise beyond my years. Compare me to most of the adults I know and I have my head on straight hence the research before I just threw $4000 in to goting to thailand for a week or 2. I usually take the whole "you are immature" line to mean that the person who is saying it was foolish at my age is trying to say "I was foolish at that age.". When I was 19 I was told I wasn't ready for college now im almost graduated. I have learned never to listen when I am told I am unable to do something.

If you were wise beyond your years, you wouldn't be here asking very naive questions about finding a wife in Thailand.

My advice is to spend the cash and take your 2 week holiday to Thailand as so many have done before you. The path is well worn and the Thais make indoctrination of newbies rather painless. You will catch jasmine fever, screw everything in sight and fall in love with the country and people. The LAST thing you should do is to set off on some mission to find a bride to take back to the west. The internet and this forum are littered with horror stories of this nature. So read a few thousand of these stories to learn the ropes and enjoy your time in Thailand for what it is.

As far as getting married, it is an outdated social construct which has run it's course. The only reason for getting married is if you want to have children. Even then, with the failure rate of marriages in the west where both parties have common ancestry, culture, philosophies and goals, it is a losing bet to try and "import" a foreign model with the hopes that she will be different. With the vast difference in Thai / farang cultures, you are fighting the odds. The only "good" Thai / farang relationships I know of are where the foreigner (you) moved to Thailand and adopted their mates way of life.

I do know how you feel as I was 27 when I got married the first time. You feel that the clock is ticking and you need to find a mate to spend the rest of your life with. My only advice here is to not rush into anything, build some wealth while you are young, travel and enjoy all that this world has to offer.

a wise person admits they don't know and asks the naive questions to better understand. Many people my age would have just jumped before looking. how much do you think a 2 week vacation would cost there?

[jefisme03]

Hmmm, but l think your heading to disaster if you need to look to LOS for a lady.

Agreed. Why the need for Thailand? Plenty of sexy Latina girls!

I know what you're saying about being 25. The Bible Belt has trained you well

A lot of what i am trying to do is escape much of the american misandry that seems to prevail its not skin color im worried about its mind set.

also im an in the closet atheist.

[jefisme03]

As far as getting married, it is an outdated social construct which has run it's course. The only reason for getting married is if you want to have children. Even then, with the failure rate of marriages in the west where both parties have common ancestry, culture, philosophies and goals, it is a losing bet to try and "import" a foreign model with the hopes that she will be different.

Obviously never been to Oklahoma.

Regarding American ladies and their spoiled nature...I agree, however the Thais are very spoiled as well. American women expect everything, while most Thai ladies only expect like 87%. But Thai ladies generally have a high sanook factor, and that is very nice.

Have you talked with your family about this? Does your family approve of you marrying a non-believer? Will you raise your children Christian, Buddhist or no religion? Does your family approve of that?

well my family knows my atheist-hood and accept it best as they can. For all intent and purposes the only family I have are my grand parents and they are 80 years old i guarantee they would accept any woman I brought in to my life unless they believe them to be malicious in nature.

[IsaanUSA]

So why Thailand? Do you have a lot of experience with Thailand and the people? You're not making any solid arguements on why you believe this is a good idea.

Have you looked into the visa situation? It costs thousands of dollars and takes many months to complete. visajourney.com has EXCELLENT information about the whole process. Not to mention the thousands of dollars you will be spending on airfare.

How do you intend to meet Thai ladies? Just fly over to Thailand and start wandering around? Dating takes months and usually years before marriage occurs. In fact, you need it to take awhile to have your fiance visa approved. Oh by the way, you can't just stay in Thailand for several months as a tourist. They have laws against that. You have to do visa runs, or attend school full time in Thailand to get an educational visa.

It sounds like you want a more "traditional" wife. Well part of being a traditional wife is love of family. You expect her just to leave her family and move to Oklahoma? Are you ready to deal with people in Tulsa giving you looks because of your interracial marriage to a non-believer? Is Oklahoma to a point where you can just tell those people, "It's ok, I'm an aethiest"?

You're making a very big decision at an early age. There are many emotional issues as well as financial issues that you WILL run into. I'm just trying to throw out some questions that will make you think more about this decision. But please tell us this, why Thailand?

[TommoPhysicist]

How do you intend to meet Thai ladies? Just fly over to Thailand and start wandering around? Dating takes months and usually years before marriage occurs. In fact, you need it to take awhile to have your fiance visa approved. Oh by the way, you can't just stay in Thailand for several months as a tourist. They have laws against that. You have to do visa runs, or attend school full time in Thailand to get an educational visa.

It took me 4 weeks from meeting a girl to marrying her (once I had seen her farm, there was no going back)

I was then on a married persons Visa extension .............

Not really all that hard to do.

But I do agree that a two week vacation is probably a tad short for wife hunting.

Edited April 11, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[JAS21]

How about finding someone who is married to a Thai in your area … chat to them … maybe they know a nice girl who would be interested in meeting you.

In all seriousness it can be wonderful having a Thai wife, mine is just nine years younger than me, the best thing I ever did in my whole life was to marry her ten years ago. However get the wrong one and like any other marriage it can be a nightmare, so I’m told.