Moving To Chiang Mai Soon And I'M Open For Any Tips

[Tywais]

Inflammatory post and replies to it removed.

[Beetlejuice]

Thailand is no longer cheap.

Indeed. (It's moved up from 'cheap' to 'very affordable and great value for money'. )

Everything is affordable and great value for money providing the money is there to support it.

3 years ago a young couple from the States, friends of my daughter, both in they’re early 30s caught the bug and decided to live the dream in Chiang Mai. They’re aim was to stay for 15 years and perhaps retire here later on. But a few weeks ago, the guy lost his teaching job and his girlfriend who was running an online business work had dried up a year ago. They both had to return to Texas to live with relatives completely broke and the last I heard the couple had broken up.

I have seen this happen over and over again. This couple are asking for tips regarding living in Chiang Mai, and my advice is; before they decide to plonk themselves in Thailand, first make sure that everything is well thought out, planned properly and above all, do some research on what they can do and can’t do under the Immigration laws, because there is a lot more involved to surviving long term in Thailand than many people believe, especially for such a young naive couple like these and I would tell them the same even if they were my own family.

[hellodolly]

Hi. In answer to your queries:Q: Are there any large differences between North, East, West, South areas of Chiang Mai? Is there a section of the city to avoid?A: In general, no. Those streets that are a little shadey should be obvious to you once you are here.Q: I'm aware that it is probably best to stay at a hotel until we find a place to rent, but are there any apartment rental websites I may have missed that'd be good to get an idea of prices from?A: The web sites will only give you an idea of what prices people ask for in English language real estate web sites, not out on the street reality.Q: What is the BEST internet company?A: Depends on the specific street/location you are living inQ: Is there any tips in terms of etiquette as far as interacting with the locals? What should and shouldn't you do in your experiences?A: This sort of general stuff is available in any guide book or tourist web site. Additionally, be open to new ways of doing things and don't continually make assumptions & judgments based on how things are back home.Q: Is there any villages around Chiang Mai that have internet? The reason I ask is that we would like to be very immersed in the culture but we absolutely must have a decent internet connection.A: Almost all have net access, but the range of available providers and account options will be more limited in some areasQ: How much would it cost for classes to learn the Thai language?A: As an example google on AUA Chiang Mai ... but there are many language schools and individual tutors.Q: Which flight company would be best to go with?A: Depends where you are coming from and obviously deals vary from one week to the next

All great ideas particularly"Q: Is there any tips in terms of etiquette as far as interacting with the locals? What should and shouldn't you do in your experiences?A: This sort of general stuff is available in any guide book or tourist web site. Additionally, be open to new ways of doing things and don't continually make assumptions & judgments based on how things are back home."I see more unhappy farongs because that is not the way they do it in the land they choose not to live in. I have been here about 7 years now and still think that is a different way to do it. Not right and Not Wrong just Different. The only exception being they drive on the wrong side of the road most of the time.Also where are you coming from are you already in Thailand say Bangkok for several years or is this going to be all new to you.As for learning the language that is a experience. I enrolled in AUA my,first week here for the beginners class I found my self in with about ten others who had all lived here for at least a year and this was the second time through the class for some of them. Then the teacher started teaching basically the vowels (that was very good). She then proceeded into teaching grammar with few new words thrown in. Basically I was being tought grammar n a language couldn't speak. I hired a one on one teacher twice a week for two hours a session 200 baht a hour. I learned a lot because she did not try to teach me some thing until I was ready to learn it. I did how ever after two weeks find my self looking at the clock for the second hour.My guess is you will probably learn better than myself. Now I find to really learn how to say a word properly I watch my wife's mouth and tongue and it really helps me in pronouncing it. No help in Memory though.How old are you. That can make a difference.

Yes we are very open to different ways of life. I was just wondering cause I have read things like not to touch anyone on the head, I understand this but I also read something like "don't point your feet" I have NO idea what that is supposed to mean.We are in Canada now moving to Thailand in the fall. We are in our mid 20's. We haven't been to Thailand before, but that's how we like it I think getting personal lessons would be a great idea for me as I am a slow learner unfortunately so that's good to know that I could hire someone to personally teach me and take the pressure off.

You thought twice a week was two often for lessons?You have great advice, thanks a million!

No twice a week was fine but after the first few weeks I found myself watching the clock for the second hour. One hour twice a week worked good for me. Many can do the 3 or 4 hour course 5 days a week I am not one of them. I would find myself falling behind . I do not have that great of a memory.

And please find a place in the old city or close to it when you get here. That will give you a chance to ease in to the culture. To live in the Nimmenheimmen, Huay kaew, CMU area you will be in the right area for younger people collage students and the coffee shops scenes. I kind of felt that was not what you were looking for. The old city will give you a idea of the culture and then you can decide how deep you want to immerse your self in the Thai culture.

Pointing your feet at some one is considered a insult by the Buddhist people.

Myself used to be a resident in the Okannogon Valley before moving here.

Edited July 17, 2012 by hellodolly

[TommoPhysicist]

Yes we are very open to different ways of life. I was just wondering cause I have read things like not to touch anyone on the head, I understand this but I also read something like "don't point your feet" I have NO idea what that is supposed to mean.

Best not to touch anyone you don't know, anywhere.

Keeping your feet on the floor prevents most problems.

(Putting your feet up on furniture is considered rude most places in the world)

Edited July 17, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[Tywais]

You might browse through this regarding Thai culture. Some language basics in it also.

Thai Language Manual (pdf)

[jacktrip]

may want to consider the solidity of your relationship with boyfriend. it's nothing like canada here. temptation will be a problem at some point.

[Jelopi]

In your 20s ...... Santhitam Road and surrounding area.

A Thai university area, full of coffee shops, internet cafes and bars with live music.

Condo will cost you 3,500-5,000bht a month (+utils)

About 1km outside the moat, near CM RAM Hospital.

3km from the Zoo and the road to Doi Suthep.

Sounds great, that's definitely the area we will be checking out.

[Jelopi]

1. Are there any large differences between North, East, West, South areas of Chiang Mai? Is there a section of the city to avoid?

I personally prefer this highlighted blue area as they are closer to shops and hospital and near parks and mountain, no flood and not too quiet.

agree with this. north-west definitely my favourite area of chiang mai to live. five minutes from the city on a scooter, easy access to nimmanhaemin and superhighway for grocery shopping, foot of the mountain and a few minutes from huay tung thao lake as well.

I also agree that this is a great area especially for people of your age..But do not commit to a one year lease until you have lived here for at least one month and start to get a feel of the city. One decent condo I know of that will rent by the week or month is Galare Thong.. There are many of us in Chiang Mai from our home and native land.

Hmm yeah we will most likely feel around that area to find the right spot. I'll have to keep the thread open so I can check out those specific areas when we get there. Thank you!

[Jelopi]

"4. Is there any tips in terms of etiquette as far as interacting with the locals? What should and shouldn't you do in your experiences?"

You should expect that some local Thai women will attempt to "steal" your boyfriend from you. Probably many. How you handle it is up to you. If this happens, do not take the law into your own hands. You may have to ignore the "politeness" recommendations in the guidebooks and make it clear that he is yours.

My guess is this will be your number one issue.

Wow really that is so weird 0_0

What kind of things do they try to do? I could see that bugging me but he is an incredibly faithful person, I'm not too sure how I'd react in a situation like that. Maybe I'll just permanently hang off his arm to let them know he's taken? That's just...so strange.

[Jelopi]

Would recommend for apartments (as suggested) looking around the Nimmenheimmen, Huay kaew, CMU way.

Most apartments have net/wifi and you can pay as you go. But shared connection sucks, so if you need better net, enquire at your apartment office if this is possible. Or, can buy a pay as you go dongle thingy..i forget the proper name! As mentioned, best net connection depends on where you live in the city.

Check out the ladies section here for anything female-specific and also chickynet chiang mai (just google!)

Welcome to Chiang mai and best of luck to you both!

Fantastic, thank you it looks like a great site!

I suppose I'll have to do some research into what is the best location for the internet since that does seem to be the leading concern.

Thank you again!

[Jelopi]

Thailand is no longer cheap.

Indeed. (It's moved up from 'cheap' to 'very affordable and great value for money'. )

But I thought this guy already educated us how to live on 100 a day?

We don't want to move cause it's cheaper than here but we want to move to experience other things.

We both have very stable jobs, so that won't be a problem. If it is, we will have back up money saved to return to Canada.

[elektrified]

Thailand is no longer cheap.

Indeed. (It's moved up from 'cheap' to 'very affordable and great value for money'. )

Everything is affordable and great value for money providing the money is there to support it.

3 years ago a young couple from the States, friends of my daughter, both in they’re early 30s caught the bug and decided to live the dream in Chiang Mai. They’re aim was to stay for 15 years and perhaps retire here later on. But a few weeks ago, the guy lost his teaching job and his girlfriend who was running an online business work had dried up a year ago. They both had to return to Texas to live with relatives completely broke and the last I heard the couple had broken up.

I have seen this happen over and over again. This couple are asking for tips regarding living in Chiang Mai, and my advice is; before they decide to plonk themselves in Thailand, first make sure that everything is well thought out, planned properly and above all, do some research on what they can do and can’t do under the Immigration laws, because there is a lot more involved to surviving long term in Thailand than many people believe, especially for such a young naive couple like these and I would tell them the same even if they were my own family.

I usually don't agree with you on too much, but in this case I do. I have seen many people come to live here with what seemed like a good plan to support themselves but due to what is happening in the global economy, things went terribly wrong for them. I too, have seen a number of people have to leave here quickly because they were flat broke. OP, bring a ton of cash!

[Ulysses G.]

You should expect that some local Thai women will attempt to "steal" your boyfriend from you. Probably many.

Wow really that is so weird 0_0

What kind of things do they try to do?

They just do what comes naturally - that is plenty - and most men are not used to large numbers of petite, attractive, feminine females paying them so much attention. IMHO young women flirting with men - even old farts - is part of the culture and most Western men have a very hard time resisting.

[WinnieTheKhwai]

You should expect that some local Thai women will attempt to "steal" your boyfriend from you. Probably many.

Wow really that is so weird 0_0

What kind of things do they try to do?

They just do what comes naturally - that is plenty - and most men are not used to large numbers of petite, attractive, feminine females paying them so much attention. IMHO young women flirting with men - even old farts - is part of the culture and most Western men have a very hard time resisting.

It does depend partly on which circles you move around in. But at the same time I also believe that in any circles, many Thai women are more open to at least a flirt even knowing he's taken.

It's almost funny because time and again it's Thai men who get a bad rap for being notorious philanderers, where at least 50% (if not more) of that picture is the Thai women enabling it very proactively.

Overall tough I wouldn't be overly concerned, though it doesn't hurt to be aware of it a little.

[Jelopi]

You should expect that some local Thai women will attempt to "steal" your boyfriend from you. Probably many.

Wow really that is so weird 0_0

What kind of things do they try to do?

They just do what comes naturally - that is plenty - and most men are not used to large numbers of petite, attractive, feminine females paying them so much attention. IMHO young women flirting with men - even old farts - is part of the culture and most Western men have a very hard time resisting.

It does depend partly on which circles you move around in. But at the same time I also believe that in any circles, many Thai women are more open to at least a flirt even knowing he's taken.

It's almost funny because time and again it's Thai men who get a bad rap for being notorious philanderers, where at least 50% (if not more) of that picture is the Thai women enabling it very proactively.

Overall tough I wouldn't be overly concerned, though it doesn't hurt to be aware of it a little.

Wow the men are bad too? Yeah I don't really involve myself with people I don't trust, but sometimes it can't be helped. I will be aware, but I trust him, otherwise I wouldn't date him. I don't like weak willed men ;D I'm sure we'll be fine haha, we mostly keep to ourselves anyways, but it is good to know none the less.

[StevieH]

most Western men have a very hard time resisting.

don't think that's true at all. huge generalisation in fact.

jelopi, i'd take comments about thai women and 'temptation' in chiang mai from the vast majority of posters on this forum with an enormous pinch of salt. they're more often than not nowhere near representative of what it's like to live in chiang mai as a 20 or 30-something farang couple.

[ChiangMai101]

Hi Jelopi. Welcome. I think you will love living in Chiang Mai. There are a some organised groups where expat ladies get together for a meal and a bit of a natter. It's great for networking, sorting out visa issues, making new friendships and finding out day to day things about making a life here. You should do fine as long as you remember that you'll need a good supply of patience.

The area you decide to live in will depend on what mode of transport you intend to use. Other posters suggested staying in different areas for a couple of weeks at a time before you make a firm decision. That is very good advice.

[TommoPhysicist]

Wow really that is so weird 0_0

What kind of things do they try to do? I could see that bugging me but he is an incredibly faithful person, I'm not too sure how I'd react in a situation like that. Maybe I'll just permanently hang off his arm to let them know he's taken? That's just...so strange.

Things like, sitting in your seat and pressing against him, when you disappear to the toilet.

Passing him their 'business card' when you aren't looking.

Accidentally brushing against him.

Then the team players get a friend to chat to you, while they make their move.

Some fairly aggressive 'farang hunters' in the CM area.

[elektrified]

We are in Canada now moving to Thailand in the fall. We are in our mid 20's. We haven't been to Thailand before, but that's how we like it

How do you know you will like it here to commit to moving here without checking it out first??? I'm just curious as sometimes (mostly on this website and this forum in particular) I hear people say that they are moving to Thailand even though they have never been here before. It can be quite a culture shock from that of the West and not for everyone. It is hot most of the time, there are millions of mosquitoes, packs of soi dogs running loose, questionable food handling/preparation, snakes, scorpions and centipedes that get in the house and garden, and on and on.

I consider myself pretty adventurous but I came to Thailand perhaps 12 times over a 17 year period of time before I decided to move here. I visited the European cities I lived in 3-5 times each before deciding to move to them. I'm not trying to discourage you in any way and think you will like Chiang Mai but really curious how a 20ish couple makes a decision like that.

[BlackArtemis]

"4. Is there any tips in terms of etiquette as far as interacting with the locals? What should and shouldn't you do in your experiences?"

You should expect that some local Thai women will attempt to "steal" your boyfriend from you. Probably many. How you handle it is up to you. If this happens, do not take the law into your own hands. You may have to ignore the "politeness" recommendations in the guidebooks and make it clear that he is yours.

My guess is this will be your number one issue.

Wow really that is so weird 0_0

What kind of things do they try to do? I could see that bugging me but he is an incredibly faithful person, I'm not too sure how I'd react in a situation like that. Maybe I'll just permanently hang off his arm to let them know he's taken? That's just...so strange.

Taken doesn't mean anything here, cheating is VERY common. THey even have a word for "The person your screwing who isn't your BF/GF" which is gik.

I highly doubt anyone will be trying to take him, easier to find a single meal ticket

But do be careful with your first friends, you are coming here blind, I think that more than a few of us can say that some of the first friends we made here turned out to be the types of people we stay far away from now.

I think if you guys can manage to make 60,000b between the two of you per month, you will be fine. You won't save much money the first few months, but once you get things sorted like scooters or a car, you can easily live on 30-40k a month and save the rest.

[WinnieTheKhwai]

Everything is affordable and great value for money providing the money is there to support it.

And yet, you can objectively say that it requires more funds to live in Zurich, Tokyo, Moscow or Shanghai. And it's not just because those are big expensive first world cities; most third world cities too are either more expensive or don't nearly provide the same value for money or standard of living at the same amount. Most African towns fall in that category too; the country may be messed up and poor beyond belief, but to live the regular expat lifestyle that we enjoy in Chiang Mai, you'd have to spend really a lot.

3 years ago a young couple from the States, friends of my daughter, both in they’re early 30s caught the bug and decided to live the dream in Chiang Mai. They’re aim was to stay for 15 years and perhaps retire here later on. But a few weeks ago, the guy lost his teaching job and his girlfriend who was running an online business work had dried up a year ago. They both had to return to Texas to live with relatives completely broke and the last I heard the couple had broken up.

That is a good argument for making sensible financial planning decisions in life, and I would agree with that. But it has nothing to do with Thailand being cheap or not. At any definition of 'cheap', this couple would need to make a lifestyle change. If this happened to them at any point in the past (let's say, Chiang Mai in 1985), they would still needed to make that same lifestyle change.

I have seen this happen over and over again. This couple are asking for tips regarding living in Chiang Mai, and my advice is; before they decide to plonk themselves in Thailand, first make sure that everything is well thought out, planned properly and above all, do some research on what they can do and can’t do under the Immigration laws, because there is a lot more involved to surviving long term in Thailand than many people believe, especially for such a young naive couple like these and I would tell them the same even if they were my own family.

Agreed. If they approach it as more of an extended gap year with a good Plan B (and Plan C) in place, along with proper health insurance they will be fine. Moving to a different spot on the globe for a while isn't rocket science either, these days.

[eek]

Jelopi, regarding what men are saying about the flirt factor..

Maybe just mention to your partner that quite a lot of Thai women enjoy the flirt game (often without any desire to be with the man. I guess its an insecurity thing) and ask him how he would handle that and how it might make you feel. Work out some bounderies and whats ok and not ok (and guys will hit on you too, just that Thai guys are generally a bit more shy and the kind of girls that are used to Farangs, arent.)

Once youve had a discussion, then forget about it!

If you have a great guy, and a great partnership, a man with any real intelligence is going to see through the empty headed flattery techniques.

Ive always felt sad that there seems to be little "sisterhood" amongst a lot of Thai women with regards to men. I would hate to be a Thai woman and worry about my so-called best friend stabbing me in the back over a guy. You might get sized-up too. I hadnt even noticed women were doing that to me, until my bf pointed it out. Rather pathetic imo..but there you go.

Now thats just one negative aspect. Not ALL thai women are like that! If you are both happy. If your partner shows you respect. Then just take it in your stride.

To be honest, a lot of Thai women are quite intimidated by farang girls. You are the unknown quantity lol.

Most guys only fall for the drivel if they desperately need the ego boosting and havent had much attention in the past.

Just dont be looking out for it..dont let this negative talk plant a seed in your head, otherwise you might see things that arent even there!

As for just taking the plunge and moving here, its exactly what i did. No major regrets. Some things would have done differently. But im a taking the plunge kinda person, so that suited me fine!

There are MANY farang/farang couples living here (some who met here such as myself and my partner, and some who came together) and are very happy together.

Have a great time and look for the positives, but yes, as mentioned, just make sure you have a good backup plan finances wise.

[hellodolly]

Everything is affordable and great value for money providing the money is there to support it.

And yet, you can objectively say that it requires more funds to live in Zurich, Tokyo, Moscow or Shanghai. And it's not just because those are big expensive first world cities; most third world cities too are either more expensive or don't nearly provide the same value for money or standard of living at the same amount. Most African towns fall in that category too; the country may be messed up and poor beyond belief, but to live the regular expat lifestyle that we enjoy in Chiang Mai, you'd have to spend really a lot.

3 years ago a young couple from the States, friends of my daughter, both in they’re early 30s caught the bug and decided to live the dream in Chiang Mai. They’re aim was to stay for 15 years and perhaps retire here later on. But a few weeks ago, the guy lost his teaching job and his girlfriend who was running an online business work had dried up a year ago. They both had to return to Texas to live with relatives completely broke and the last I heard the couple had broken up.

That is a good argument for making sensible financial planning decisions in life, and I would agree with that. But it has nothing to do with Thailand being cheap or not. At any definition of 'cheap', this couple would need to make a lifestyle change. If this happened to them at any point in the past (let's say, Chiang Mai in 1985), they would still needed to make that same lifestyle change.

I have seen this happen over and over again. This couple are asking for tips regarding living in Chiang Mai, and my advice is; before they decide to plonk themselves in Thailand, first make sure that everything is well thought out, planned properly and above all, do some research on what they can do and can’t do under the Immigration laws, because there is a lot more involved to surviving long term in Thailand than many people believe, especially for such a young naive couple like these and I would tell them the same even if they were my own family.

Agreed. If they approach it as more of an extended gap year with a good Plan B (and Plan C) in place, along with proper health insurance they will be fine. Moving to a different spot on the globe for a while isn't rocket science either, these days.

In my 70 years on this planet I have discovered that often plan z was the best after all. Just so the plan prepares for the idea that some thing beyond your control can go wrong one will be OK.

[TommoPhysicist]

Ive always felt sad that there seems to be little "sisterhood" amongst a lot of Thai women with regards to men. I would hate to be a Thai woman and worry about my so-called best friend stabbing me in the back over a guy. You might get sized-up too. I hadnt even noticed women were doing that to me, until my bf pointed it out. Rather pathetic imo..but there you go.

Now thats just one negative aspect. Not ALL thai women are like that! If you are both happy. If your partner shows you respect. Then just take it in your stride.

Almost every one of my wife's friends and relatives that felt they had a chance, gave it a go ........ from age 14 to age 50.

One night at a party I was sitting at a table, all girls, during the course of the evening they all managed to feel my leg, tell me their bf/husband didn't understand them, and tried to slip me their phone numbers. My wife has permanently banned her best friend from our house due to 'excessive interest'.

Once they got to know me, all the 'shyness' completely disappeared.

Eek, you're not a guy, you can't begin to understand how hit on, us 'decent?' white guys are. I don't make any pretense to be rich or handsome, but they just don't give up.

Most guys only fall for the drivel if they desperately need the ego boosting and havent had much attention in the past.

You are talking about almost every white guy in Thailand, suddenly we are the hunted instead of being the hunters.

Edited July 18, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[WinnieTheKhwai]

LOL. I liked Eek's post, I also appreciated Tommo's post how he has to beat women off him with a big pointy stick.

But let's skip back to what I think is the elephant in the room, which is that neither you or your boyfriend have every been to Thailand. Of course there is always a first time for everything, but if people at least holidayed here for a week or two then they have had their first impression, and a reasonable impression if they would feel comfortable living full time here. (Which may still turn out wrong, but having had feet on the ground remains better than Google)

Speaking from experience of having first-timers visit me in Thailand, I am always amazed how some people just 'click' with the place almost instantly, whereas others need a lot more time to start to feel comfortable, or never really get comfortable. It's not even the case that the most out-going, eager to try anything, can-do people necessarily click faster than those who are normally more cautious and reserved; there is absolutely no telling. From what you write you of course think that you will have an easier time adjusting, just be prepared that this may not be the case. So both of you have to be prepared to take thing as little slower when you find that the other isn't quite comfortable with the surroundings yet. It could potentially put a strain on the relatioship much more than any flirting by locals; heck, the more cautious partner will be scared to death of flirting locals. (Or tell him they all have Aids. )

So especially if this is a first plunge then you need a Plan B, and not feel like it's 'giving up' to actually move on to it. Stay flexible, don't commit to renting anything for a year from the get-go, live in a guesthouse or hotel for a couple weeks, then move on to something a bit more long term if you all still like the place. But if not, or feel that you like travel and exploring more than spending effort on rebuilding your lives, then just do so; move on, check out other parts of Thailand, other parts of Asia, or other parts of the world.

Edited July 18, 2012 by WinnieTheKhwai

[stacks]

Watching this thread, I'm headed out there in Sept and had a lot of the same questions. Right on!

[Tywais]

Right on!

My guess, California?

Welcome to the CM forum and Thaivisa. There have been several topics recently of others making the move so good place to start reviewing information in them. Just remember, sometimes need to read between the lines of member's posts here.

[eek]

A plan B is always a good idea, no matter what the circumstances!

Ive always felt sad that there seems to be little "sisterhood" amongst a lot of Thai women with regards to men. I would hate to be a Thai woman and worry about my so-called best friend stabbing me in the back over a guy. You might get sized-up too. I hadnt even noticed women were doing that to me, until my bf pointed it out. Rather pathetic imo..but there you go.

Now thats just one negative aspect. Not ALL thai women are like that! If you are both happy. If your partner shows you respect. Then just take it in your stride.

Almost every one of my wife's friends and relatives that felt they had a chance, gave it a go ........ from age 14 to age 50.

One night at a party I was sitting at a table, all girls, during the course of the evening they all managed to feel my leg, tell me their bf/husband didn't understand them, and tried to slip me their phone numbers. My wife has permanently banned her best friend from our house due to 'excessive interest'.

Once they got to know me, all the 'shyness' completely disappeared.

Eek, you're not a guy, you can't begin to understand how hit on, us 'decent?' white guys are. I don't make any pretense to be rich or handsome, but they just don't give up.

Ok, im not a guy..but i did live for a stint in Argentina, and guys there are VERY forward. Very attentative. Flirtatious. Sexy. Attractive. On my first visit there i had a long term partner. I was on my own visiting family. If i had wanted to mess around i could have, but being a "decent" woman, it didnt enter my mind. I may not be a guy, but im still a red-blooded female with desires. Attention from attractive men doesnt have my brain or respect for my partner going out the window. I suppose the attention i got there would somewhat equal the attention guys get here.

I also have an attractive young (in fact younger than me) partner. Girls come on to him all the time, and hes a bit of a flirt himself. We have had to work out between us what we both consider OK and not OK. He was a single guy for a long time (serial dater...aka "playboy'), so we have had a lot of adjustments together! He does the occasional boys night out thing and when with his male friends he can ogle and smile or whatever else he wants to do, and i do occasional nights out without him and appreciate good looking guys when he isnt around. When together, if we are people watching we aim to do it without ogling . But with a lot of female eye-candy around here, its obviously harder for him than me..lol. But for me it boils down to respect, thats all. Im not in the least intimidated by girls here, but i do feel deflated by the competative aspect. The western side of me has a hard time getting my head around the idea of a woman out to get another womans man. Sure it happens in the west too, but the women would be vilified. ..here it seems par the course. Thats hard for relationships. I wish it didnt seem so cut-throat.

Edit: but sorry OP if this is veering too much off topic!

Edited July 18, 2012 by eek

[mesquite]

"4. Is there any tips in terms of etiquette as far as interacting with the locals? What should and shouldn't you do in your experiences?"

You should expect that some local Thai women will attempt to "steal" your boyfriend from you. Probably many. How you handle it is up to you. If this happens, do not take the law into your own hands. You may have to ignore the "politeness" recommendations in the guidebooks and make it clear that he is yours.

My guess is this will be your number one issue.

Wow really that is so weird 0_0

What kind of things do they try to do? I could see that bugging me but he is an incredibly faithful person, I'm not too sure how I'd react in a situation like that. Maybe I'll just permanently hang off his arm to let them know he's taken? That's just...so strange.

Well, the others have pretty much summed it up. My guess is unless your boyfriend has a deep religious conviction against infidelity (as opposed to just a social one) or simply finds Asian women unattractive, he will not be able to resist the temptation.

And, the reverse is not true. Young attractive farang women are all over Chiang Mai, and are not highly sought after by either Thai or farang men. So you will probably not get much attention from the opposite sex, other than your boyfriend.

I'm not saying your stay here can't work out, but as others have stated, Thai women will go after you boyfriend.

[eek]

"4. Is there any tips in terms of etiquette as far as interacting with the locals? What should and shouldn't you do in your experiences?"

You should expect that some local Thai women will attempt to "steal" your boyfriend from you. Probably many. How you handle it is up to you. If this happens, do not take the law into your own hands. You may have to ignore the "politeness" recommendations in the guidebooks and make it clear that he is yours.

My guess is this will be your number one issue.

Wow really that is so weird 0_0

What kind of things do they try to do? I could see that bugging me but he is an incredibly faithful person, I'm not too sure how I'd react in a situation like that. Maybe I'll just permanently hang off his arm to let them know he's taken? That's just...so strange.

Well, the others have pretty much summed it up. My guess is unless your boyfriend has a deep religious conviction against infidelity (as opposed to just a social one) or simply finds Asian women unattractive, he will not be able to resist the temptation.

And, the reverse is not true. Young attractive farang women are all over Chiang Mai, and are not highly sought after by either Thai or farang men. So you will probably not get much attention from the opposite sex, other than your boyfriend.

I'm not saying your stay here can't work out, but as others have stated, Thai women will go after you boyfriend.

Sorry..but totally disagree. Men who find Asian (and another nationalities) attractive, can and have been, faithful. Maybe its impossible for YOU.

Tommy said i cannot speak for farang men..in that light, can you really speak for farang women? Personally i havent had an issue with attention and im not even that great. I HAVE seen near traffic accidents when pretty farang girls pass by on bicycles. A lot of expats that come here purely for the women, because they have a specific taste in Asian women, or merely available women, likely have the mindset that non-Asian women are not on the radar. Maybe they arent on the radar as much as non-Asian countries, but an attractive woman will get attention, no matter where she is from.

Edited July 18, 2012 by eek