Foreigner At Home Vs Foreigners In Thailand

[ttthailand]

It's not a matter of helping out the Gf and giving her some money to stay home and keep you company. The problem starts when the amount you have to give is much more then they really require or could make if they were working ( not as bar girl). They will never be happy and will always be looking for a higher bidder. If they worked in a gogo bar and was a hot girl they were making 50 to 100K a month....they will want that amount. If you have to pay something near that so they have to stay with you they are not really you gf and you are not their bf...you are their sponsor or john or what ever you want to call it but Not BoyFriend.

So lets look at the above post. How many go go girls are there in Thailand earning 100,000 baht per month? 50 at the outside 100. How many single male tourists and INTERNET Romeos? 10 million? So how many guys have the opportunity to hook up with those 100 gold go go dancers? What percent? Do you good Thai Visa folks think this is a normal occurrence? There are 24,000 killed by lightening strikes per year. How many Brits marry go go dancers per year? I'm just saying....

So you think I am pulling this out of the air... look at the numbers for a month...bar pays 10,000 , drinks 6,000 , tips 4,000 , John deals 20 times out average 2,000 each 40,000 . Gifts and money being sent 10,000 Up. total 70,000 a month and many make a lot more then that...most don't get anywhere near that. I know a girl that works at a beer bar who makes 70,000 plus every month and is cute but also is 28 years old...

[cdnvic]

18) Not to discuss the specifics of prostitution.Thailand has a visible sex industry, and acknowledgment of that fact is not forbidden. However ThaiVisa is not the place to seek or give information on this topic, regardless of your sexual habits, preferences or orientation.

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/index.php?app=forums&module=extras&section=boardrules

[TommoPhysicist]

Its easy back home the guys did not have enough money to rent love and here they do. Then they forget they are renting and think its real love and they are a hansum man. The girl cheats or steals too much and then they break up.

Solution get a girl without flashing cash around and you will be ok.

I don't remember it being that much different back home.

The guys with the cash/BMW/mansion always got the most desirable girls, and they always fooled themselves it was 'real love' (whatever that is).

[brit1984]

In the real world, there is far more to (most) relationships than just money, and one person's contribution to a relationship can take many forms (not just financial).

Each couples' financial arrangements depend on their unique circumstances, and making judgments on how others' manage their money is difficult (and pointless).

[F1fanatic]

In the real world, there is far more to (most) relationships than just money, and one person's contribution to a relationship can take many forms (not just financial).

Each couples' financial arrangements depend on their unique circumstances, and making judgments on how others' manage their money is difficult (and pointless).

Anybody that thinks that "one person's contribution to a relationship can take many forms (not just financial)", is trying to justify something odd.

Any relationship that is going to ultimately 'work', relies on the partnership genuinely sharing everything - money, work-load, caring etc.

It has nothing to do with 'different' contributions other than the obvious of a different work-load. As soon as someone is keeping the money and making 'payments' to their partner - it is something entirely different.

[brit1984]

In the real world, there is far more to (most) relationships than just money, and one person's contribution to a relationship can take many forms (not just financial).

Each couples' financial arrangements depend on their unique circumstances, and making judgments on how others' manage their money is difficult (and pointless).

Anybody that thinks that "one person's contribution to a relationship can take many forms (not just financial)", is trying to justify something odd.

Any relationship that is going to ultimately 'work', relies on the partnership genuinely sharing everything - money, work-load, caring etc.

It has nothing to do with 'different' contributions other than the obvious of a different work-load. As soon as someone is keeping the money and making 'payments' to their partner - it is something entirely different.

I agree with you (and I disagree with you). Sharing is normally the best way, and is the way it is done by most couples I know (or at least those I know well enough to know how they manage their money).

However, there are circumstances (for example one or the other partner being financially irresponsible / reckless) when sharing is not optimal. Without knowing all the details about a couples' relationship (i.e. on an anonymous internet forum) it is difficult to pass judgment.

PS: I will assume your first sentence was just a collection of random typos rather than anything worth discussing further.

Edited August 27, 2012 by brit1984

[BKKBobby]

I guess most of these guys sending money, have "girlfriends" who are way outside their age range. In the west most couples with a big age difference are between beautiful women and men with extremely high social status, and usually these relationships dont last more than max 10 years. Of course there are ladies in all countries that genuinely are attracted by "older" men, but they are exceptions to the rule. No one expects women in their 20s in the west to be attracted to "old" men. But many men dont understand that what women wants is pretty much universal. Its like the older European women who sex travels to Gambia and think that the african men "sees the real me, understands my real worth", as if young black men somehow should have a preference for fat ugly older women. Thinking that way might even be considered unintentional racism.

Theres nothing wrong with women being attracted by a high social status or money, its normal in all countries. If you want to get into philosophical questions, then if you really want you can see it as matrimonal prostitution, but hey, its universal.

If you are "young" and look decent or good looking, then a thai girl can be attracted to you, maybe she also falls for your charm and wits. Even if shes subconcsiously also attracted to your social standing and money, if youre in your 20s or 30s its nothing weird, its normal! Its equivalent to the west. But if you are fat, ugly, way outside her age range, then think, and then think again, why she would want you, would she want you in the west? If not, then she probably doesnt really want you in the east. Does these men themselves want older women, no obviously not, why do they expect thai women to be different.

And I dont think its wrong with age differences in relationships, either if its a older man with a younger girl or vice versa. Its up to each person to decide how they want to live their life.

And no, im not old myself, just turning 30 this year.

Edited August 27, 2012 by BKKBobby

[TommoPhysicist]

If you are "young" and look decent or good looking, then a thai girl can be attracted to you, she might like your charm or wits. Even if shes unconsiously also attracted to your social standing and money, if youre in your 20s or 30s its nothing weird, its nothing to think about. Its equivalent to the west. But if you are fat, ugly, way outside her age range, then think, and then think again, why she would want you, would she want you in the west? If not, then she probably doesnt really want you in the east.

Thinking any Thai lady wants you (a white foreigner of any age) is weird (more like delusional).

[pattayadingo]

Why wouldn't someone with money want to financially support someone they love who has far less money?

to a point, this makes sense. but only to a point.

Is it love? Or is it many of the men thinking and being led to believe it is love?

I thought the topic was more about men back in their home country sending money over here to a Thai woman. A woman they maybe see twice a year for a few weeks at a time. A lot of those men think they are in love. They also believe the women are at home being good girlfriends when many are in the bar working.

I speak to many Thai people, both men and women and it is amazing the amount of stories you hear from the women who seem proud to boast their 'boyfriend' is sending them X Baht each month and he believes she is being faithful to him. These are not only b/g's either.

I do think that if you are living with a woman full time who has a limited wage, that there is nothing wrong with supporting her to some degree, the emphasis being on support and not giving money out hand over fist.

If I am living in her house I'd be happy to pay a good share of most living expenses because I'd not be paying any rent for a house or a condo. My food is different to hers in many ways so that is an extra expense too. Then there might be satellite t.v. and internet that are sometimes added extras a woman might not need or want.

At the end of the day it is down to balance.

Yet those living abroad and paying for what is essentially a holiday fling are the men who need their heads looking at. IMHO

[TommoPhysicist]

Yet those living abroad and paying for what is essentially a holiday fling are the men who need their heads looking at. IMHO

I'm thinking that any man who moves in with any woman could be considered mentally borderline.

Paying them not to live with you might be the sanest policy.

Edited August 27, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[BKKBobby]

If you are "young" and look decent or good looking, then a thai girl can be attracted to you, she might like your charm or wits. Even if shes unconsiously also attracted to your social standing and money, if youre in your 20s or 30s its nothing weird, its nothing to think about. Its equivalent to the west. But if you are fat, ugly, way outside her age range, then think, and then think again, why she would want you, would she want you in the west? If not, then she probably doesnt really want you in the east.

Thinking any Thai lady wants you (a white foreigner of any age) is weird (more like delusional).

Why so?

Even if you met her at your workplace, university? You still think she would be ashamed, thinking that she sees it as losing face? Even if you are young, good looking, high social standing by both east and western standards, and got money?

What you are saying is racism. You are implying that all thai women are racists.

Edited August 27, 2012 by BKKBobby

[TommoPhysicist]

Why so?

Even if you met her at your workplace, university? You still think she would be ashamed, thinking that she sees it as losing face? Even if you are young, good looking, high social standing by both east and western standards, and got money?

Unless you are small and girly looking, it is unlikely a Thai girl will find you attractive (do a google search for Korean pop stars). Trust me on this one, all Thai girls think you are too big, and your nose is too big ...... you are not attractive to them in the slightest. Most of Thai society looks down on Thai women who date white men. Thai girls are brought up to believe Thai men are best. As a white foreigner your social standing is zero (even if you speak Thai, which is unlikely). Thais are nationalists (as Thai isn't a race, it can't be called racism)

You are batting against the odds on all fronts ....... apart from the attraction of your money and foreign passport.

Edited August 27, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[BKKBobby]

Why so?

Even if you met her at your workplace, university? You still think she would be ashamed, thinking that she sees it as losing face? Even if you are young, good looking, high social standing by both east and western standards, and got money?

Unless you are small and girly looking, it is unlikely a Thai girl will find you attractive (do a google search for Korean pop stars). Trust me on this one, all Thai girls think you are too big, and your nose is too big ...... you are not attractive to them in the slightest. Most of Thai society looks down on Thai women who date white men. Thai girls are brought up to believe Thai men are best. As a white foreigner your social standing is zero (even if you speak Thai, which is unlikely). Thais are nationalists (as Thai isn't a race, it can't be called racism)

You are batting against the odds on all fronts ....... apart from the attraction of your money and foreign passport.

Social standing is universal, and im not talking about the elder of a tribe in some hut, that cant be translated to high social standing in other countries, I mean if youre for example a yuppie, then youre a yuppie wherever you go. People recognize it wherever you chose to go. But according to a lot of people on Thai forums, somehow Thais are different from 99,9% of all other countries. No one would say these things about south koreans, chinese, japanese etc, but according to people on the forums thai people are different from all other nationalities, asian, middle eastern, europeans, americans etc.

For example, in the US, if youre middle eastern and have high social standing, as being successfull in business etc, the girls outside the bible belt couldnt care less about your ethnicity.

You say they prefer petite koreans, well think this way. You might mostly be attracted to lets say white western europeans, but you probably recognize and get interested if you see a universally good looking japanese or indian girl? Isnt that what it normally is? Most people recognize good looks even if its not the race that they prefer. A guy might mostly be triggered by good looking african women but he would most likely be triggered by universally good looks even if shes not that race.

You say that most thai women like the korean popstar look. But are you not talking about thai teens who have funny clothes like a lot of young japanese girls? If you look at the famous popstars in the west, in their early twenties often look feminine, but they are popstars, and their millions of millions big fanbase are mostly teeens. They are chosen cause they attract teens, who are the people that buy the cds and go to the concerts.

The majority of adult women whether in North Korea or Saudi Arabia dont prefer, that is - get sexually attracted by outright feminine looking men.

If the girl has a universally high social standing she wouldnt care about a foreign passport. But yes you are right if youre talking about the overwhelming majority of thai girls that farang men hook up with.

Edited August 27, 2012 by BKKBobby

[siampreggers]

If you are "young" and look decent or good looking, then a thai girl can be attracted to you, she might like your charm or wits. Even if shes unconsiously also attracted to your social standing and money, if youre in your 20s or 30s its nothing weird, its nothing to think about. Its equivalent to the west. But if you are fat, ugly, way outside her age range, then think, and then think again, why she would want you, would she want you in the west? If not, then she probably doesnt really want you in the east.

Thinking any Thai lady wants you (a white foreigner of any age) is weird (more like delusional).

I dunno. I'm mid 30s, moved here in my mid 20s.

I certainly did alright.

[TommoPhysicist]

No one would say these things about south koreans, chinese, japanese etc, but according to people on the forums thai people are different from all other nationalities, asian, middle eastern, europeans, americans etc.

Japanese, Koreans and Chinese are also very nationalistic ........ they won't accept you as anything other than a 'barbarian foreigner' either.

But please, don't let me burst your little fantasy about being a very handsome man.

You believe what makes you happy, buy her a house and a car, why not.

Edited August 27, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[siampreggers]

^ Sounds like the making of a good porno... that I'd like to be in.

[arthurwait]

Why so?

Even if you met her at your workplace, university? You still think she would be ashamed, thinking that she sees it as losing face? Even if you are young, good looking, high social standing by both east and western standards, and got money?

Unless you are small and girly looking, it is unlikely a Thai girl will find you attractive (do a google search for Korean pop stars). Trust me on this one, all Thai girls think you are too big, and your nose is too big ...... you are not attractive to them in the slightest. Most of Thai society looks down on Thai women who date white men. Thai girls are brought up to believe Thai men are best. As a white foreigner your social standing is zero (even if you speak Thai, which is unlikely). Thais are nationalists (as Thai isn't a race, it can't be called racism)

You are batting against the odds on all fronts ....... apart from the attraction of your money and foreign passport.

Having a big nose or high bridged nose is seen as one of the 'wanting what you haven't got ' attractive features as I found out with people complimenting my sons. Along with blue eyes, light or blond hair, muscles, big chest, stocky build, etc, white skin for some, dimples and the stranger ones low- amount of moles, blonde body hair. Or for the men blonde hair and big boossoms which was the main reason it seemed my old housemate did his masters in the UK.

Not too menton the girls that have plastic surgery to make their noses bigger especially Thai TV stars and Korean pop and soap stars etc. Or all the Thai guys in the gym body building with the girls oggling them, they aren't little feminine men.

You need to try the central Thai citys where the girls with money (of some degree) or a career/decent job met farangs at universities abroad or through real jobs. You'll find the opinion is a lot different to some country place where the only girls that meet farangs are bar girls.

[jacktrip]

I think its a fettish! They get shafted at home, come here and think wow lets get shafted in Thailand. If your 50 + years old, having a young lady young enough to be your daughter, tell you she loves you, wants to be with you long time! Well you can see my point! That doesnt happen ever back home, they would look at you as a perv. But here in Thailand!!!!!

Sent from my GT-P6200 using Thaivisa Connect App

your a perv here too.

[BKKBobby]

No one would say these things about south koreans, chinese, japanese etc, but according to people on the forums thai people are different from all other nationalities, asian, middle eastern, europeans, americans etc.

Japanese, Koreans and Chinese are also very nationalistic ........ they won't accept you as anything other than a 'barbarian foreigner' either.

But please, don't let me burst your little fantasy about being a very handsome man.

You believe what makes you happy, buy her a house and a car, why not.

If I would pay, then I would pay a lady of the night for the night. Having fun, no strings or emotional attachment, and a <deleted>*k. Ladies of the night are exotic and fun! I dont fall in love with western wh*res and accordingly doesnt fall in love with eastern wh*res. A wh*re is a wh*re is a wh*re. I find the girl repulsive besides on a physical level, and having short time fun - barfining her to go get drunk and clubbing for the night. I wouldnt pay anyone to be my girlfriend. Seeing it as having a girlfriend but just actually paying a prostitute to be your long term company is stupid. If she wants and/or have a family that wants her to sell herself to being able to provide extra money to her family rather than provide less via a normal job then shes not girlfriend material. I only buy houses and cars in my own name, and when/if I marry Im going to have a prenuptional agreement, western or eastern women or not, doesnt matter. As a foreigner I cant own land in Thailand so I wouldnt buy a house either way. I can own a condo, and If I would buy one it would be in my own name and no one else.

Edited August 27, 2012 by BKKBobby

[DP25]

If you are "young" and look decent or good looking, then a thai girl can be attracted to you, she might like your charm or wits. Even if shes unconsiously also attracted to your social standing and money, if youre in your 20s or 30s its nothing weird, its nothing to think about. Its equivalent to the west. But if you are fat, ugly, way outside her age range, then think, and then think again, why she would want you, would she want you in the west? If not, then she probably doesnt really want you in the east.

Thinking any Thai lady wants you (a white foreigner of any age) is weird (more like delusional).

If you had come to Thailand at a different point in your life, you might realize how retarded that statement is. Sorry you missed out dude

[culicine]

I pay my wife each month. I've lived here for 5 years so I know how it's works. It's only stupid when you're not getting anything in return for it(for example living abroad while your bar "girlfriend" is still giving jobs). In my case I get plenty of companionship and sex with the deal.

If you want to have a woman, you have to pay. Some pay it through giving their house or assets up after divorce. Some pay it through a monthly allowance. Same same.

It might be strange to you but i know many guys who are not paying their g/f's actually their gf is sharing in the costs and has her own job. I know it a real novel idea for many guys an independent woman.

Mine has a job c8 civil service, earns close to my salary, has the same education as me too. Things work out for some people. Also I met her in Australia, and a number of my friends also met their missus overseas, rather than in Thailand.

[ggold]

I think its a fettish! They get shafted at home, come here and think wow lets get shafted in Thailand. If your 50 + years old, having a young lady young enough to be your daughter, tell you she loves you, wants to be with you long time! Well you can see my point! That doesnt happen ever back home, they would look at you as a perv. But here in Thailand!!!!!

Sent from my GT-P6200 using Thaivisa Connect App

your a perv here too.

Indeed, the reality is that the only reason a young lady would be with a much older guy is money, and nothing to do with love.

But it is fair to say that what ever relationship you are in, be it with someone much younger, older or whatever. You pay for it one way or another. Not that money should be what it is all about. As long as you can see the reality, be honest with yourself! Then you can't have any complaints if it turns bad.

Sent from my GT-P6200 using Thaivisa Connect App

[chiangmaikelly]

I think its a fettish! They get shafted at home, come here and think wow lets get shafted in Thailand. If your 50 + years old, having a young lady young enough to be your daughter, tell you she loves you, wants to be with you long time! Well you can see my point! That doesnt happen ever back home, they would look at you as a perv. But here in Thailand!!!!!

Sent from my GT-P6200 using Thaivisa Connect App

your a perv here too.

Jack I think what you should say is you think it is perverted. Because coming to Thailand and not thinking a 30 year age difference is normal or not thinking that paying for companionship is normal is kind of like going to France and telling everyone you don't like wine and cheese the PM having an affair.

[StreetCowboy]

I think its a fettish! They get shafted at home, come here and think wow lets get shafted in Thailand. If your 50 + years old, having a young lady young enough to be your daughter, tell you she loves you, wants to be with you long time! Well you can see my point! That doesnt happen ever back home, they would look at you as a perv. But here in Thailand!!!!!

Sent from my GT-P6200 using Thaivisa Connect App

your a perv here too.

Indeed, the reality is that the only reason a young lady would be with a much older guy is money, and nothing to do with love.

But it is fair to say that what ever relationship you are in, be it with someone much younger, older or whatever. You pay for it one way or another. Not that money should be what it is all about. As long as you can see the reality, be honest with yourself! Then you can't have any complaints if it turns bad.

Sent from my GT-P6200 using Thaivisa Connect App

So the only thing old fellas have going for them is money?

All this "sense of humour", "thoughtfulness", that's all a load of oldcobblers then?

All that matters is age? And perhaps looks?

Just as well I've got more money than sense, then...*

SC

* To be fair, I reached that stage fairly early in my career, when I took the second paper round...

Edited August 27, 2012 by StreetCowboy

[KeyserSoze01]

Its a special favour for those of us who have no-one else we can feel superior to.

I can't remember the last time I heard such a story, but I am sick of people going on about how many such stories there are. Perhaps if you asked stupid questions about your own situation, instead of stupid questions about hypothetical others, you might get more entertaining answers.

Alternatively, if you must persist, why not ask stupid questions about someone who does not correspond to such a tired and worn out stereotype?

SC

I have to agree. She bought our house (100% loan, nothing down). I make the payments. It is less than I paid in rent when I was alone for 50% more space and convenience. She has a 30 year loan. In 30 years I'll be 100 years old.

It reminds me of the young and old threads. Or the paid sex vs I don't know I am paying for sex threads.

There must be some need to denigrate others that is rampant among certain sectors of Thai Visa members. That nice guy from Scotland has tried to start two positive threads lately without any success. It just can't be done here.

Your post does not sound like the ChiangMaiKelly I've been reading on another site for years. Are you "the" ChiangMaiKelly or someone that is just using the nic?

[StreetCowboy]

Its a special favour for those of us who have no-one else we can feel superior to.

I can't remember the last time I heard such a story, but I am sick of people going on about how many such stories there are. Perhaps if you asked stupid questions about your own situation, instead of stupid questions about hypothetical others, you might get more entertaining answers.

Alternatively, if you must persist, why not ask stupid questions about someone who does not correspond to such a tired and worn out stereotype?

SC

I have to agree. She bought our house (100% loan, nothing down). I make the payments. It is less than I paid in rent when I was alone for 50% more space and convenience. She has a 30 year loan. In 30 years I'll be 100 years old.

It reminds me of the young and old threads. Or the paid sex vs I don't know I am paying for sex threads.

There must be some need to denigrate others that is rampant among certain sectors of Thai Visa members. That nice guy from Scotland has tried to start two positive threads lately without any success. It just can't be done here.

Your post does not sound like the ChiangMaiKelly I've been reading on another site for years. Are you "the" ChiangMaiKelly or someone that is just using the nic?

Where I come from, there's loads of Kellys, and some of them are not related. Similarly, Ingles, Blacks, etc. Maybe there's two kellys in Chiang Mai. I never checked to see if there was any Streetcowboys on any other fora.

SC

[chiangmaikelly]

Its a special favour for those of us who have no-one else we can feel superior to.

I can't remember the last time I heard such a story, but I am sick of people going on about how many such stories there are. Perhaps if you asked stupid questions about your own situation, instead of stupid questions about hypothetical others, you might get more entertaining answers.

Alternatively, if you must persist, why not ask stupid questions about someone who does not correspond to such a tired and worn out stereotype?

SC

I have to agree. She bought our house (100% loan, nothing down). I make the payments. It is less than I paid in rent when I was alone for 50% more space and convenience. She has a 30 year loan. In 30 years I'll be 100 years old.

It reminds me of the young and old threads. Or the paid sex vs I don't know I am paying for sex threads.

There must be some need to denigrate others that is rampant among certain sectors of Thai Visa members. That nice guy from Scotland has tried to start two positive threads lately without any success. It just can't be done here.

Your post does not sound like the ChiangMaiKelly I've been reading on another site for years. Are you "the" ChiangMaiKelly or someone that is just using the nic?

What do you think the difference is Keyser?

[siampreggers]

Men, I'm sorry to say, will never be able to understand women.

[KeyserSoze01]

The crazy thing is that many foreigners come to Thailand and use the money-angle to try and snatch a Thai girl. Then they act all surprised and stunned to learn later that she's only interested in their money. Bizarre.

And here we have the chicken and the egg scenario. If there were no sirens of the night beckoning to love-lorn farang, then there would be fewer farang losing the plot, along with all their dosh to the sirens sweet song.

No, my contention is the fleecing farang is an industry in Thailand. One that has been going on as long as men have been traveling to Thailand on R&R. You don't hear these types of stories about any other country with the frequency that it happens in Thailand. So is it the Thai culture that lends itself to taking advantage of anyone naive or is it the farang for believing the lies they are told about their little poo ying loving them?

[KeyserSoze01]

Its a special favour for those of us who have no-one else we can feel superior to.

I can't remember the last time I heard such a story, but I am sick of people going on about how many such stories there are. Perhaps if you asked stupid questions about your own situation, instead of stupid questions about hypothetical others, you might get more entertaining answers.

Alternatively, if you must persist, why not ask stupid questions about someone who does not correspond to such a tired and worn out stereotype?

SC

I have to agree. She bought our house (100% loan, nothing down). I make the payments. It is less than I paid in rent when I was alone for 50% more space and convenience. She has a 30 year loan. In 30 years I'll be 100 years old.

It reminds me of the young and old threads. Or the paid sex vs I don't know I am paying for sex threads.

There must be some need to denigrate others that is rampant among certain sectors of Thai Visa members. That nice guy from Scotland has tried to start two positive threads lately without any success. It just can't be done here.

Your post does not sound like the ChiangMaiKelly I've been reading on another site for years. Are you "the" ChiangMaiKelly or someone that is just using the nic?

What do you think the difference is Keyser?

I think not, as your tone and opinions do not resemble the opinions from the real ChiangMaiKelly. And here I had hoped that CMK has chosen to grace the page of TV with his wit and wisdom. Much like many things in Thailand, it's all an illusion.