Famous Quotes

[alvino]

Having sex is like playing bridge.

If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand."

Woody Allen

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"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday

night."

Rodney Dangerfield

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"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal,

particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."

Lynn Lavner

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"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."

Camille Paglia

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"Sex is one of the nine reasons for incarnation.

The other eight are unimportant."

George Burns

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"Women might be able to fake orgasms.

But men can fake a whole relationship."

Sharon Stone

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"Hockey is a sport for white men.

Basketball is a sport for black men.

Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."

Tiger Woods

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"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."

Jack Nicholson

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" Clinton lied.

A man might forget where he parks or where he lives,

but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."

Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a

sense of humor )

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"Ah, yes, divorce,

from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his

wallet."

Robin Williams

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"Women need a reason to have sex.

Men just need a place."

Billy Crystal

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"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable

undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other

women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are

just grateful."

Robert De Niro

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"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are

having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe

swelling. So what's the problem?"

Dustin Hoffman

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"There's very littl e advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I

know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked'."

Jerry Seinfeld

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"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only

enough blood to run one at a time."

Robin Williams

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"It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom."

Joan Rivers

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"Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences money

can buy."

Steve Martin

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" You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older.

Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff

you pay good money for in later life."

Elmo Phillips

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" Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."

Oscar Wilde

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" It isn' t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married."

George Burns

[FlyingDutchman]

A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.

Sir Winston Churchill

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A love for tradition has never weakened a nation, indeed it has strengthened nations in their hour of peril.

Sir Winston Churchill

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All great things are simple, and many can be expressed in single words: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Although prepared for martyrdom, I preferred that it be postponed.

Sir Winston Churchill

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An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile - hoping it will eat him last.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Broadly speaking, the short words are the best, and the old words best of all.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb.

Sir Winston Churchill

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From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put.

Sir Winston Churchill

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He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

Sir Winston Churchill

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History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.

Sir Winston Churchill

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I cannot pretend to feel impartial about colours. I rejoice with the brilliant ones and am genuinely sorry for the poor browns.

Sir Winston Churchill

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I have always felt that a politician is to be judged by the animosities he excites among his opponents.

Sir Winston Churchill

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I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.

Sir Winston Churchill

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It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried.

Sir Winston Churchill

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It is a mistake to try to look too far ahead. The chain of destiny can only be grasped one link at a time.

Sir Winston Churchill

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It's not enough that we do our best; sometimes we have to do what's required.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Never, never, never believe any war will be smooth and easy, or that anyone who embarks on the strange voyage can measure the tides and hurricanes he will encounter. The statesman who yields to war fever must realize that once the signal is given, he is no longer the master of policy but the slave of unforeseeable and uncontrollable events.

Sir Winston Churchill

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One ought never to turn one's back on a threatened danger and try to run away from it. If you do that, you will double the danger. But if you meet it promptly and without flinching, you will reduce the danger by half.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Personally I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.

Sir Winston Churchill

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The price of greatness is responsibility.

Sir Winston Churchill

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The reserve of modern assertions is sometimes pushed to extremes, in which the fear of being contradicted leads the writer to strip himself of almost all sense and meaning.

Sir Winston Churchill

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There are a terrible lot of lies going around the world, and the worst of it is half of them are true.

Sir Winston Churchill

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To build may have to be the slow and laborious task of years. To destroy can be the thoughtless act of a single day.

Sir Winston Churchill

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We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.

Sir Winston Churchill

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When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my own country. I make up for lost time when I come home.

Sir Winston Churchill

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When the eagles are silent, the parrots begin to jabber.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Don't talk to me about naval tradition. It's nothing but rum, sodomy and the lash. []

Sir Winston Churchill

[suegha]

Wow!!!

[alvino]

-Chris Rock's Quote of the Year

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a

white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in

the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is

accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war,

and the three most powerful men in America are named Bush, Dick,

and Colon.

Need I say more?"

[johnh101]

Never, never, never believe any war will be smooth and easy, or that anyone who embarks on the strange voyage can measure the tides and hurricanes he will encounter. The statesman who yields to war fever must realize that once the signal is given, he is no longer the master of policy but the slave of unforeseeable and uncontrollable events.

Sir Winston Churchill

Very apt for current events.

[suegha]

-Chris Rock's Quote of the Year

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a

white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in

the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is

accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war,

and the three most powerful men in America are named Bush, Dick,

and Colon.

Need I say more?"

Absolutely brilliant!!!