A very confident James Bond walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very

attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his

watch for a moment.

The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?"

"No," he replies, "Q has just given me this state-of-the-art watch. I was

just testing it."

The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about

it?"

Bond explains, "It uses alpha waves to talk to me telepathically."

The lady says, "What's it telling you now?"

"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties."

The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken because I am wearing

panties!"

Bond smirks, taps his watch and says, "Bloody thing's an hour fast.

do not blame pierce brosnan , i love him , i will kick u

I don't think he's blaming anyone. It's a classic Bond Joke...

Great Joke, but I picture the best Bond, Sean Connery when I read it

We all picture our favorite Bond. Mine also is Connery!

Film director Tamahori arrested on sex charge

Saturday February 4 2006 16:46 IST

Reuters

LOS ANGELES: New Zealand-born director Lee Tamahori, whose films include the James Bond hit "Die Another Day," has been arrested on a sex charge while wearing a woman's dress and a wig, officials said on Friday.

Tamahori, 55, was arrested January 8 in a police sting operation and charged with prostitution and loitering in a public place, City Attorney spokesman Frank Mateljan said.

The filmmaker is accused of offering to perform oral sex on an undercover police officer in exchange for money.

Tamahori had been set to be arraigned on Thursday, but the hearing was postponed until February 24. If convicted of the misdemeanour charges, he faces a maximum of six months in jail and a $1,000 fine (570 pounds), Mateljan said.

Tamahori gained notice for directing the 1994 drama "Once Were Warriors," a film set in New Zealand about a family of native Maori whose lives have been plagued by alcohol, drugs and violence. Tamahori's father is Maori.

He followed that film with the 1950s crime drama "Mulholland Falls" and thriller "The Edge," starring Anthony Hopkins and Alec Baldwin.

Tamahori went on to make a splash with 2002's "Die Another Day," which starred Pierce Brosnan as British secret agent 007 and Halle Berry as an American agent named Jinx. The movie raked in more than $430 million worldwide.

But his action film "xXx: State of the Union," starring rapper Ice Cube bombed at the box office last year.

Media reports said he was being represented by famed Los Angeles defence attorney Mark Geragos, who has worked for pop singer Michael Jackson and actress Winona Ryder.

maybe he just want to do a research for new Bond's girl who is an oldie ho

Film director Tamahori arrested on sex charge

Saturday February 4 2006 16:46 IST

Reuters

LOS ANGELES: New Zealand-born director Lee Tamahori, whose films include the James Bond hit "Die Another Day," has been arrested on a sex charge while wearing a woman's dress and a wig, officials said on Friday.

Tamahori, 55, was arrested January 8 in a police sting operation and charged with prostitution and loitering in a public place, City Attorney spokesman Frank Mateljan said.

The filmmaker is accused of offering to perform oral sex on an undercover police officer in exchange for money.

Tamahori had been set to be arraigned on Thursday, but the hearing was postponed until February 24. If convicted of the misdemeanour charges, he faces a maximum of six months in jail and a $1,000 fine (570 pounds), Mateljan said.

Tamahori gained notice for directing the 1994 drama "Once Were Warriors," a film set in New Zealand about a family of native Maori whose lives have been plagued by alcohol, drugs and violence. Tamahori's father is Maori.

He followed that film with the 1950s crime drama "Mulholland Falls" and thriller "The Edge," starring Anthony Hopkins and Alec Baldwin.

Tamahori went on to make a splash with 2002's "Die Another Day," which starred Pierce Brosnan as British secret agent 007 and Halle Berry as an American agent named Jinx. The movie raked in more than $430 million worldwide.

But his action film "xXx: State of the Union," starring rapper Ice Cube bombed at the box office last year.

Media reports said he was being represented by famed Los Angeles defence attorney Mark Geragos, who has worked for pop singer Michael Jackson and actress Winona Ryder.

maybe he just want to do a research for new Bond's girl who is an oldie ho

Rumour has it, he slept with all his leading stars, including Bronson.