Why Is It Almost Impossible To Meet A Good Girl Here In Thailand?

[Berkshire]

How to find a good girl, and keep her:

a/ Living in an area which isn't full of farang, is definitely a good start. A lot more difficult to find a good girl living in a farang area

b/ Get a job, you'll meet normal people at work or work functions

c/ Internet dating websites can work.

d/ Get some Thai friends, through them you'll no doubt meet some good girls, and your friends can then vouch for them.

e/ Learning Thai definitely lets you cast the net a lot wider soto speak

f/ Don't lower your standards just because she's young and good looking. Look for a girl who has a good education, who has a good job and who isn't burdened with young children.

I've seen people do all of the above, and still find bad girls, likewise you don't need to do all of the above to find a good girl, but each of them definitely increases your chances.

Pretty good list and I'd agree with just about all of your points.

But to be fair, this guy (http://www.stickmanbangkok.com/ReadersSubmissions2012/reader7802.htm) also made a list and he still got screwed. I think his mistake was requiring the Thai girl speak English. Thai girls who can speak English know that there are a lot of inept farangs who can't speak Thai and are ripe for the pickin.

[bdw]

It can be impossible, if you're broke, but that's the same anywhere in the World.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

Pretty good list and I'd agree with just about all of your points.

But to be fair, this guy (http://www.stickmanb.../reader7802.htm) also made a list and he still got screwed. I think his mistake was requiring the Thai girl speak English. Thai girls who can speak English know that there are a lot of inept farangs who can't speak Thai and are ripe for the pickin.

I agree as well, and note he covers that with point E.

I appreciate the subtlety of his phrasing, but some people require more blunt warnings.

But I'm not saying competent English speaking is in itself a warning sign in all cases, just a strong odds-maker as you descend the socio-economic ladder.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

It can be impossible, if you're broke, but that's the same anywhere in the World.

Only assuming you're older and uglier than your target profile.

Old and fugly - and even financially secure - is quite doable for broke guys, especially cute ones willing to be the boy toy, all the factors in the equation cut both ways 8-)

[bdw]

financially secure - is quite doable for broke guys

Talk about an Oxymoron !

[Stradavarius37]

To the OP - Its not impossible, you are just looking in the wrong place. Either that, or you have bad karma, and you are just <Snipped!> lol.

Edited November 14, 2012 by metisdead
: Profanity edited, lol.

[NeverSure]

Pretty good list and I'd agree with just about all of your points.

But to be fair, this guy (http://www.stickmanb.../reader7802.htm) also made a list and he still got screwed. I think his mistake was requiring the Thai girl speak English. Thai girls who can speak English know that there are a lot of inept farangs who can't speak Thai and are ripe for the pickin.

Well, the guy felt like a fool but I disagree. Anyone can be lied to from afar or up close. The guy apprently left with little loss of money; the hurt was mostly emotional which is bad enough.

A gal who has lived in the states, been married to a Harvard guy is IMHO far more of a red flag than speaking English. I wonder how the Harvard guy did in the end with the State's property laws? I'll bet he really got screwed including part of his retirement. I'll bet he has a high IQ too, and I'll always repeat that high IQ doesn't equate to wisdom.

Where were his rules about hanging out with a gal for a long time before committing? Where were his rules about not ever getting emotionally in too deep so that he could walk if needed? He didn't talk about money which is amazing if he lost little, but he didn't have on his list his rules about keeping his finances to himself and under his control.

He had a list like an employment offer - meet these. I don't see the list about self protection after a prospect is hired - the probationary period.

$.02

[BigJohnnyBKK]

financially secure - is quite doable for broke guys

Talk about an Oxymoron !

Read a little more carefully, thought I was being clear that the female sponsor of the broke boy toy's the financially secure one.

[tingtongtourist]

yes that is some story on the stickman page.I also know a girl like this and i think is more common than we think.

Stickman comment that the girl is not honest with him from start but i think really, this woman believe what she does is just normal day to day thing so no need for a big deal.she probably did think the american would not even be offended is how they think.

i have also met thai lady who believe this in themself..nothing wrong with doing this,if they have chance to get money off some other guy then even you should be happy for her and encourage her to do it!

maybe we should be like the thai guy and ask for a share of the profit!

[BigJohnnyBKK]

i have also met thai lady who believe this in themself..nothing wrong with doing this,if they have chance to get money off some other guy then even you should be happy for her and encourage her to do it!

maybe we should be like the thai guy and ask for a share of the profit!

Sure, even the worst scammers in the financial industry have stories they tell themselves so they can sleep at night.

I know quite a few farang guys that actively help girls scam foreigners, pretty decent living at it too.

Just put up a "translator available at reasonable rates" sign in your local Internet shop and you too can cash in on this fast-growing growth industry.

Edited November 14, 2012 by BigJohnnyBKK

[brewsterbudgen]

i have also met thai lady who believe this in themself..nothing wrong with doing this,if they have chance to get money off some other guy then even you should be happy for her and encourage her to do it!

maybe we should be like the thai guy and ask for a share of the profit!

Sure, even the worst scammers in the financial industry have stories they tell themselves so they can sleep at night.

I know quite a few farang guys that actively help girls scam foreigners, pretty decent living at it too.

Just put up a "translator available at reasonable rates" sign in your local Internet shop and you too can cash in on this fast-growing growth industry.

Nothing wrong with helping a girl communicate with her tilac overseas!

[WebBangkok]

I meet my wife in Australia. I didnt speak Thai at the time and she is a good chick. Totally different to what people describe as the typical girl on Thaivisa.

Although the typical Thai girl is probably very far from Thaivisa reality and probably are just deluded to want to put down Thai girls as much as they can because they got shafted by a bar girl lol... Thats is very true.

Oh, if she is good at pool and can kick all your friends asses and has been undefeated for 6 months, you should probably stay away from her lol

[BigJohnnyBKK]

Nothing wrong with helping a girl communicate with her tilac overseas!

Of course not, until you start helping them translate statements which you know to be false.

Even if you get paid by the word or by the hour or take it in trade.

Then you get those guys that actually organize, recruit the cuties who don't already know the ropes and put them on a commission basis.

Still OK in your lights?

[BigJohnnyBKK]

I meet my wife in Australia. I didnt speak Thai at the time and she is a good chick. Totally different to what people describe as the typical girl on Thaivisa.

Although the typical Thai girl is probably very far from Thaivisa reality and probably are just deluded to want to put down Thai girls as much as they can because they got shafted by a bar girl lol... Thats is very true.

Oh, if she is good at pool and can kick all your friends asses and has been undefeated for 6 months, you should probably stay away from her lol

100% sure you're right, we foreigners in general don't get a fair picture of the average Thai girl, only a very very small percentage have had anything to do with us, and only a (pretty) small percentage of those are anything but normally moral people.

And those of us posting here definitely represent a tiny fraction of guys that have learned our lessons the hard way, no claiming objectivity here.

But I have to say, I haven't met too many average nice moral Thai girls that are good at pool, so I'll take your advice and keep away from yours. . .

[tingtongtourist]

i have also met thai lady who believe this in themself..nothing wrong with doing this,if they have chance to get money off some other guy then even you should be happy for her and encourage her to do it!

maybe we should be like the thai guy and ask for a share of the profit!

Sure, even the worst scammers in the financial industry have stories they tell themselves so they can sleep at night.

I know quite a few farang guys that actively help girls scam foreigners, pretty decent living at it too.

Just put up a "translator available at reasonable rates" sign in your local Internet shop and you too can cash in on this fast-growing growth industry.

hehe i would like to do but actually i am told that uneducated hookers have better english than me, so my product is a hard sell

[chiangmaikelly]

i have also met thai lady who believe this in themself..nothing wrong with doing this,if they have chance to get money off some other guy then even you should be happy for her and encourage her to do it!

maybe we should be like the thai guy and ask for a share of the profit!

Sure, even the worst scammers in the financial industry have stories they tell themselves so they can sleep at night.

I know quite a few farang guys that actively help girls scam foreigners, pretty decent living at it too.

Just put up a "translator available at reasonable rates" sign in your local Internet shop and you too can cash in on this fast-growing growth industry.

hehe i would like to do but actually i am told that uneducated hookers have better english than me, so my product is a hard sell

Try the educated ones. They hang out at universities. Maybe you will have better luck.

[PookieLittlePuppy]

8. All the "good" foreign men are in their home countries married, me thinks.

I wonder if you really know just how right you are and just how much foreign women (and "good" foreign men) agree with you.

Your comment is PERFECT.

EDIT. I clicked your "like" button once. I'd like to click it a million times. You really are absolutely spot on.

Excuse me, Are you sure? I have american mate who has everything all women want ; rich handsome young ( 34 ) highly educated, bright future lie ahead and married to a beautiful highly educated american woman who was born in wealthy family and 8 years his junior.

But they have fight every other day because he still fool around with other women he meets. Is this "good" foreign man you referring to? If the married foreign men living abroad considered "good" are really good as you say, there will be no such high divorce rate in the US.

[NeverSure]

8. All the "good" foreign men are in their home countries married, me thinks.

I wonder if you really know just how right you are and just how much foreign women (and "good" foreign men) agree with you.

Your comment is PERFECT.

EDIT. I clicked your "like" button once. I'd like to click it a million times. You really are absolutely spot on.

Excuse me, Are you sure? I have american mate who has everything all women want ; rich handsome young ( 34 ) highly educated, bright future lie ahead and married to a beautiful highly educated american woman who was born in wealthy family and 8 years his junior.

But they have fight every other day because he still fool around with other women he meets. Is this "good" foreign man you referring to? If the married foreign men living abroad considered "good" are really good as you say, there will be no such high divorce rate in the US.

In my limited experience not nearly all divorces are caused by infidelity. Many divorce over what's called incompatibility or "irreconcilable differences." People fight over in-laws and money and drinking too much and you-name-it. When they are tired of fighting they get divorced.

I don't think you proved your point, and I don't think things are a lot different in a lot of countries.

[rene123]

I don't think the majority of men want to meet a "good" girl. They only want her to change to "good" after they've met her and want her for themselves exclusively.

[eek]

8. All the "good" foreign men are in their home countries married, me thinks.

I wonder if you really know just how right you are and just how much foreign women (and "good" foreign men) agree with you.

Your comment is PERFECT.

EDIT. I clicked your "like" button once. I'd like to click it a million times. You really are absolutely spot on.

Excuse me, Are you sure? I have american mate who has everything all women want ; rich handsome young ( 34 ) highly educated, bright future lie ahead and married to a beautiful highly educated american woman who was born in wealthy family and 8 years his junior.

But they have fight every other day because he still fool around with other women he meets. Is this "good" foreign man you referring to? If the married foreign men living abroad considered "good" are really good as you say, there will be no such high divorce rate in the US.

Just as an aside, so many talk about the divorce rate in the west.

Thailand has a lot of unofficial marriages, and separations. It also has a mia noi culture (so no official divorce in order to save face). Also gigs and liaisons.

Really think official western divorce statistics cannot be realistically used as a comparison to the Thai way of doing things.

[TommoPhysicist]

In my limited experience not nearly all divorces are caused by infidelity. Many divorce over what's called incompatibility or "irreconcilable differences." People fight over in-laws and money and drinking too much and you-name-it. When they are tired of fighting they get divorced.

In my wide experience most marriages end when the wife no longer has sex with her husband.

(Usually sometime between the birth of her first child and/or her age reaching 45). The drinking, arguing or womanizing on the man's part is merely his natural response to sexual frustration.

Edited November 17, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[NewlyMintedThai]

Maybe a better question would be, "what do I have going for me that might be attractive to a quality Thai woman?"

[BigJohnnyBKK]

Just as an aside, so many talk about the divorce rate in the west.

Thailand has a lot of unofficial marriages, and separations. It also has a mia noi culture (so no official divorce in order to save face). Also gigs and liaisons.

Really think official western divorce statistics cannot be realistically used as a comparison to the Thai way of doing things.

And I personally would consider a marriage that's only "officially" still together where the husband and wife only make appearances at social and business-related functions once in a while to maintain appearances just as successful as the many more where they're miserably living together under one roof hating each other.

To me the Thai model results in a much higher likelihood of success in keeping the family unit intact, just as raising children should be more of a group effort, the whole judeo-christian 1:1 model is IMO fundamentally flawed.

[tinfoilhat]

its not, simple as that.

[HardenedSoul]

In my wide experience most marriages end when the wife no longer has sex with her husband.

(Usually sometime between the birth of her first child and/or her age reaching 45). The drinking, arguing or womanizing on the man's part is merely his natural response to sexual frustration.

Is that what happened to you, then?

[BigJohnnyBKK]

I don't think the majority of men want to meet a "good" girl. They only want her to change to "good" after they've met her and want her for themselves exclusively.

It really is pointless doing the "air quotes" thing, let's just use more precise terms please.

A I believe most men (wisely) want a girl with integrity and character, who won't lie to them or steal from them.

B I also believe most men (foolishly) want a girl who won't fool around with other men. Obviously, it's not foolish to want that, if you believe you can also commit to be faithful to her as well as expecting the same from her -- in other words, if you believe that monogamy is a practical arrangement, likely to succeed in your case.

Note my preference is to agree to be completely honest with each other (A) about the fact that you'd like to have other partners, and negotiate the terms required to make each other feel completely secure in your relationship despite that openness. This of course makes B irrelevant.

C Now if you're defining your "good" as a girl with little sexual experience, then I agree, few men want that. I personally do, but for purely practical reasons, not moral ones, in fact I don't think quantity of sexual experience has anything to do with morality (A above) nor likelihood to be faithful (B above).

Edited November 17, 2012 by BigJohnnyBKK

[Semper]

Why is it almost impossible to meet a good girl here in Thailand?

Obviously you didn't find one in your home country. What made you think it would be more easy here?

[rene123]

I don't think the majority of men want to meet a "good" girl. They only want her to change to "good" after they've met her and want her for themselves exclusively.

It really is pointless doing the "air quotes" thing, let's just use more precise terms please.

A I believe most men (wisely) want a girl with integrity and character, who won't lie to them or steal from them.

B I also believe most men (foolishly) want a girl who won't fool around with other men. Obviously, it's not foolish to want that, if you believe you can also commit to be faithful to her as well as expecting the same from her -- in other words, if you believe that monogamy is a practical arrangement, likely to succeed in your case.

Note my preference is to agree to be completely honest with each other (A) about the fact that you'd like to have other partners, and negotiate the terms required to make each other feel completely secure in your relationship despite that openness. This of course makes B irrelevant.

C Now if you're defining your "good" as a girl with little sexual experience, then I agree, few men want that. I personally do, but for purely practical reasons, not moral ones, in fact I don't think quantity of sexual experience has anything to do with morality (A above) nor likelihood to be faithful (B above).

I think there is still an ingrained, puritanical thought process going on here. Men want women they can get into bed as quickly as possible, and then have the temerity to say she is a slut. Boys like to brag about their "conquests" like it is some sort of achievement. But, after they finally find the sexually inexperienced woman they say they want, they then want her to be a vixen, but only for them. You can't have it both ways, guys.

[Mosha]

Define a good girl. Teacher maybe,? I know one who has stabbed 2 Thai husbands, 1 a policeman, and tried it with a Farang husband. Personal experience, a bar girl saved my life getting me to hospital and rounding my mates up to let them know. These topics are tedious.

[SiameseCurios]

Maybe a better question would be, "what do I have going for me that might be attractive to a quality Thai woman?"

Mmmm. Maybe that warrants a whole new thread.

Edited November 17, 2012 by SiameseCurios