My 7 Year Old Daughter Dancing Like A Lap Dancer

[tinfoilhat]

bleat on. bleat, bleat, bleat.

[Rancid]

Kids are kids and will copy, some mothers think it is OK or funny to do erotic moves and others would stamp it it out real fast. My kids copy Gangman but there is no way my daughter would be allowed to look like she was auditioning for an agogo bar. Different attitudes, in the end who is right, who knows?

[barefoot1988]

i would imagine a lap dancer dance involve grinding and other sexual contact move. that seems really wrong for a 7 years old, certainly i dont feel fine at all if my 7 year old daughter start dancing erotically

seriously, a 7 year old doing erotic dance? i must be a dinosaur or something, i dont find it acceptable in any way

[BigJohnnyBKK]

I have also tried to explain to my son that most of the Thai soaps don't reflect real life also.

The Thais in my house know if they let my kids near their room(s) when that crap's on the satellite's getting pulled for a month. Definitely rots the brain, terrible behaviour models, screeching fights physical domestic violence, wouldn't let any kids I cared about near the stuff, better off watching almost anything else even Mr Bean.

[TommoPhysicist]

I have also tried to explain to my son that most of the Thai soaps don't reflect real life also.

The Thais in my house know if they let my kids near their room(s) when that crap's on the satellite's getting pulled for a month. Definitely rots the brain, terrible behaviour models, screeching fights physical domestic violence, wouldn't let any kids I cared about near the stuff, better off watching almost anything else even Mr Bean.

I thought the Thai soaps reflected hiso reality quite well (excluding the magic bits).

[Bangkokhatter]

Beetlejuice does sometimes over do his posts , but have to agree with him here, the kid is 7 for gods sake !

[mauGR1]

Most of tv is crap, do your children a favour, keep them out of it as much as possible.

[tw25rw]

Many many conservative and religious-minded people feel that mass media has been embedding pornographic sexuality deep into the subconsciousness of our youth for many decades now.

I'm neither, but I agree with them..

[bina]

not a thai reaction;

my husband, a country thai, was not at all pleased when my daughter (not his, not adopted by him, she lving between my house and ex's house in kibbutz) and her girl class mates were all in an extra curriculer jazz/modern dance group. they performed in a well known club that was closed to parents and friends only for their performance on stage... much of the dancing although with full body leaotards (lots of lite religious families here)involved what i considered overly sexual movements including one number to the song ' like my hump bump (or whatever it was really called). husband was horrified with the pelvic moves, belly dance style steps (we are in the mediterreanean so we all do those belly dance type movements in dancing, even in disco/clubs).

he was glad when she dropped out of dance after five years as he often alluded to 'working girls in bangkok' when asked how she danced (she's a good dancer/ballet, etc), and then went on to criticize her clothing when she started going out with girlfriends (actual dating here mostly happens in groups of boys and girls together)... i feel that although the songs were not always appropriate (seems that choreographers dont pay attention to the words but to the music), dance is dance.

if it was up to him, she would be in jeans, t shirt and nothing shorter.

andhe is a thai male.

while he enjoys the youtube pop clips, he often made comments about her watching britney spears, biance, et al.

however whe a little girl dances like that home, of course everyone will clap and carry on... its cute. same as here. its different once they start going out, or performing (if they are in a dance troupe or similar).

if she actually enjoys dancing, try enrolling her in a little girls dance (jazz modern is healhtier then ballet) group/club...

[BigJohnnyBKK]

Many many conservative and religious-minded people feel that mass media has been embedding pornographic sexuality deep into the subconsciousness of our youth for many decades now.

I'm neither, but I agree with them..

Well I'd say your agreeing with that statement pretty much self-identifies you as relatively socially conservative even if you don't see yourself that way. At least on that one issue.

I completely agree with the statement too by the way, I just see that trend as positive, to me the term "pornography" has about as much objective meaning as "race", IOW none.

What I find disgusting is that our sacred sexuality is being put to use in the service of evil consumerism.

not a thai reaction;

<snip>

and he is a thai male.

I've observed the kind of conservatism you're talking about a lot, but more among males than females, and particularly with father wrt their daughters.

Among the women not so much, in fact it sounds outrageous, but what would be prosecuted as "grooming" in the west is pretty common here by mothers and other female relations, are usually dressing the little girls up and encouraging them to do the sexy moves, no harm done all in good fun.

Keep in mind from a social evolutionary POV the importance for a girls future (and therefore that of the family elders she'll have to support) her ability to catch a financially secure male.

Not something the fathers spend much time thinking about. . .

Edited November 13, 2012 by BigJohnnyBKK

[cheechoo]

i know you are one of those who dont want to hear the truth!

Sexualiztion of a 7 year old is criminal. Go live with your kid or suffer the consequences.

I bet just for fun one of your family members JOKINGLY gave the 7 year old some money for her dancing--------i can see it now!

[MrHammer]

To those saying it's normal, yes, it's probably normal in lower class families who'se daughters grow up to be sluts because of no parenting.

To deny that younger and younger children/teens are being sexualized is simply being naive. Go look at how much skin was shown in the 90s by female popstars. It was nowhere near as much as now. Even Britney Spears only showed a bit of her belly to begin. Now Rihanna is wriggling around in an S/M costume practically naked, which I very much enjoy watching, but it's clearly not something young children should be watching. Her first ideas about sex will be that you have to be a massive slut to be popular.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

OP don't mind the reactionary old gits here really, that's what you get posting for advice on such sensitive topic on TV.com, very hard to keep things on a civil track here, I apologize on behalf of the community such as it is.

It's true without a conservative senior male around to keep things in check, the mainstream mores of extremely erotic femininity be encouraged by our current pop culture will also be encouraged to be imitated by the girls.

But that's just the way the modern world rolls by default these days, not much you can do about it long-distance and IMO no real harm done, or at least there are much more serious potential sources of harm in kids' lives than this to worry about.

Obviously the key is the love and care those responsible for kids exercise day to day, and lots of kids raised in imperfect situations end up just fine, others raised by "perfect parents" end up all messed up.

Don't fret over stuff you don't have control over, let go and let live a bit and it'll all be OK.

[endure]

Your 7 year old daughter is copying something she saw on TV. It's you (and all the other horrified posters) on this thread who are making a big deal out of nothing. If she'd been watching Swan Lake she'd be dancing like a wounded swan. She's 7 years old. She likes to watch people who dance. She doesn't understand what 'Lap Dancing' is.

[jimbobs1]

Thank you Big Johny and most others for their comments i will certainly think again about adding a controversial topic without prior thought , it has been insightful though and seems to be of the popular opinion that this needs addressing but should not cause major concern, and is definately not the Thai way in general,There has been a few hurtful comments directed at me and my family which in hindsight i should of expected, but with such a personal topic and with many parents going through the same thing as me, regarding working away from your family so you can give them a better life

.I do not have the relevant skills to earn a good living in Thailand so i am forced to work in various shit holes around the world. I am somewhat concerned that these people should make a point of being rude about what is essentially a topic which surrounds a little girls well being.

Thank you to the people who have tried to administer me constructive advice and for your valuable insight into the Thai psyche , i love my wife dearly but the Thai way still baffles me at times, it is just different not wrong.

Jim

[poanoi]

Nuffin compared to this HORROR.

btw i wish i could dance like this, or in fact i wish i could dance at all,

also wish my gf could dance

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAhMFd5uWa4

[Rimmer]

Some inflammatory posts removed also a quoted reply

[Semper]

It's not too different from when I was a kid in the 1980's

So, you must be pushing 40 by now.

[tw25rw]

Many many conservative and religious-minded people feel that mass media has been embedding pornographic sexuality deep into the subconsciousness of our youth for many decades now.

I'm neither, but I agree with them..

Well I'd say your agreeing with that statement pretty much self-identifies you as relatively socially conservative even if you don't see yourself that way. At least on that one issue.

Maybe socially conservative in that one narrow way. I don't like seeing under-age girls behaving in an overtly sexual way.

Won't be much conserving when I hit Soi Cowboy next week though.

[mike123ca]

Being a father isn't easy. From what I've read from this thread, he said he is a step father

and also works away from home. I suspect being away from home will reduce his ability to

influence change on his family's behavior. If he is uncomfortable with something

then he should express his concern.

He was also confronted with a 2nd problem and that being

his family are all Thai and he is not. He will always be told to do things the "Thai way".

[poanoi]

If he is really lucky, that include a 2nd wife

[BigJohnnyBKK]

In this case it not being his daughter combined with his not being their in person combined with his being the cultural outsider, makes his opinion functionally irrelevant, and even expressing it will result simply in such displays no longer being shown to him, to prevent the behavior from occurring when he's not around.

Maybe socially conservative in that one narrow way. I don't like seeing under-age girls behaving in an overtly sexual way.

Won't be much conserving when I hit Soi Cowboy next week though.

I meant the general statement about the sexuality permeating pop culture to be pornographic; what you express is perfectly appropriate IMO, but although I may be personally disturbed by it as long as proper care is being taken that nothing actually comes of it until they're of age then no actual harm done.

[teatree]

To those saying it's normal, yes, it's probably normal in lower class families who'se daughters grow up to be sluts because of no parenting.

To deny that younger and younger children/teens are being sexualized is simply being naive. Go look at how much skin was shown in the 90s by female popstars. It was nowhere near as much as now. Even Britney Spears only showed a bit of her belly to begin. Now Rihanna is wriggling around in an S/M costume practically naked, which I very much enjoy watching, but it's clearly not something young children should be watching. Her first ideas about sex will be that you have to be a massive slut to be popular.

Not to mention the lyrics:

From 'Rude Boy'

Come on rude boy are you big enough,

Come on rude boy can you get it up,

etc etc etc

[rene123]

I think it is normal here in Thailand. I've seen children on stage during Thai festivals that dance the same way. Dance seems to be taught in Thai schools and it's understandable that children will mimic what they see on television.

[pbeieio]

Chill out, at least she can dance!

3 years of Ballet lessons and mine still dances like a "fairy elephant"!!!!!!!

[tinfoilhat]

what a load o' &lt;deleted&gt;.

when i was 7 we were holding kiss concerts in our underwear.

kids will be kids and the "lap dance" is pure hyperbole, i highly doubt the child was grinding her butt against anybody's junk.

Every generation has something the curmudgeons object to from Elvis to Madge and beyond

Edited November 15, 2012 by tinfoilhat

[BigJohnnyBKK]

Every generation has something the curmudgeons object to from Elvis to Madge and beyond

Madge?

[tinfoilhat]

madonna

[jimbobs1]

ok i dont think you are a gang of wrongins here is the video

IMG_1125 (1).MOV

[tinfoilhat]

got to admit i wouldn't be too thrilled about it, it is a little over the top