Missing British Thailand Traveller Tom Armstrong Found Safe And Well

[stiggy]

Glad hes fine.

We are not owed any explanation as to why or where, despite the interest.

End of the day he was not a minor he's 22, as long as he hadn't broke local laws IE visa etc, why should anyone expect that he reports his actions.

It was inconsiderate to his family who was obviously concerned and like others I feel for them, but do any of us know the history etc.

Many people go missing, who do not wish to be found as adults that is there choice.

Before internet took off I used to disappear for months at a time, in India the outback or elsewhere.Calling home approx every 3 months or so.

[tominbkk]

Missing Brit found alive in Thailand

Tom Armstrong.

21 going on 40....yikes! Looks like he got a bad case of the herps!

[kennedy]

I wonder how much money this cost daddy (police etc). Maybe the next missing person's family will not have the resourses, so yes it is everyones business.

[Pimay1]

I wonder how much money this cost daddy (police etc). Maybe the next missing person's family will not have the resourses, so yes it is everyones business.

No idea but the son should have to pay the total cost everyone incurred due to his dissapearing act. And I feel the same way about these hikers and mountain climbers that get lost or become distressed and have to be rescued. They know the risks and should be responsible for their own actions. Something that rarely happens today. Edited February 19, 2013 by Pimay1

[Briggsy]

I think that is acne rather than a herpes sore.

[MaxLee]

We know he has been found, but still we don't know, ...

1. What really happened?

2. Why didn't he contact his parents?

3. What trouble did he run into (IF any)?

Or maybe his parents have a reason not to tell the public about this, since it'll be family business from now on???

[harber8]

Selfish or blinded by the fun and freedom of Thailand.

Suffolk is like watching paint dry compared with this place.

[SparklingCascades]

Takes a particular IQ-level for a guy to stay silent & hidden away even whilst parents are at breaking point & in full flight from the U.K. to try find the man.

[ragamuffin]

I'm a bit pissed off by not getting any info, to be honest. Not even the Facebook page mentions what actually happened. A lot of people tried to help the family and now Tom was found and that's it?

[HerbalEd]

And.......?

Don't we get any explanation as to where/why he went missing?

Sent from my GT-I9100T

Most likely because he is a self centered, selfish and uncaring young man.

[Pimay1]

I wouldn't mind betting he has been balls deep in the new found love of his life! The smell of that ole pussy can do funny things to a guys perspective

Not sure about the smell I never go that far down.

Sometimes new vistas result in great rewards.

[CecilEugene]

If a person wants to drop out and tune in and flop on a beach smoking weed or whatever other nonsense Tomw was up to, go for it, but for God's sake (and those that may worry about you), frickin' let them know that is your intention, so that an international man-hunt isn't generated looking for your selfish ass.

Amen

[rct99q]

Maybe they are waiting to exit the country before any other statements are made.

[jamhar]

I know what his dad is thinking

" i'm glad he's not dead

So i can kill him when i see him!!"

lol

He's got a lot of 'splain to do

[joepattaya1961]

Now concern turns to anger ...

Amazing.......and that without knowing the exact reason for his "missing"-situation.

Judging without knowing any back-ground, that's what people good at here!!

[Briggsy]

He could well be on overstay by now.

[ragamuffin]

Well, Joe, what do you think happened? He wasn't abducted, he's been in Bangkok all the time and even visited Khao Sarn, he's used ATMs and he did neither call nor email nor text his family. What justifies this behaviour in your opinion?

I find it quite interesting that even on Facebook the family only says he's "alive and uninjured but that does not mean he is well".

[GentlemanJim]

So he wasn't lost in Thailand he just had failed to phone home and inform his parents of his change of plans?

Pretty inconsiderate but hardly news worthy for the BBC me thinks.

But they have only just found out it was not news worthy! Meanwhile everyone was conducting a manhunt.

There seems to be an undercurrent of controling attitude about the father.

He has a 21 year old adult son, who doesn't do what he is told and goes into

an international panic and flies to Thailand in search of his prodigal.

I get the sense the kid purposely, ignored the home front to get a long over due break from them.

Never imagining daddy dearest would go multi-national panic button.

When he's lost control of little boy blue, daddy blows his horn long and loud.

Thinking to publicly shame the lad back under his thumb.

I think son found his first taste of real freedom in his whole life,

and just couldn't face getting back home, and return to the unwanted gaunlet of daddy's plans for his life.

That explains the obviously intentional lack of contacts to home and the rather fast panic button hit.

Just my 2 cents, but it fits the facts as presented IMHO.

I think that's a completely unfair assessment of the situation, and does not fit in with the facts does it. The guy emailed his parents on Jan 6 saying he was flying home on Jan 9. So there you are as the father, go to pick your son up from the airport.....no show...<deleted>! What do you mean he never boarded the aircraft...he said he was flying back on this flight. Wait several nerve racking days and nothing, you call the embassy, call the Thai police...nothing. Is it really an over controlling Father that then hits the panic button, or someone who cares for the welfare of their now missing son? I am sometimes amazed as to how peoples perceptions of a situation can be so far apart when it's the same information available.

I think it's a perfect assessment of the situation, coming from a dysfunctional family myself. We HAD to email our dad EVERYTHING we were doing. When you grow up under this amount of control, it's difficult to wrest back control of your own life and make decisions for yourself. What PROBABLY happened here is that Tom did what he was PROBABLY 'programmed' to do by his father by sending that last email, and then realised "Wait... THIS is my chance... it's now or never... who gives a shit if I am disowned? I can easily make a living here... all by myself. Freedom at last!" So he decides to bolt. Of course the dad is concerned -- any control freak will be. My dad would have done the same, rest his soul. There's something that needs to be understood about the nature of parents that are absolute control freaks. Most people don't understand this... these parents are NOT f*ing normal. They have it in their sick minds that they OWN you. Don't matter that you're already old enough to look after yourself. These parents believe that they've invested enough time and money in their offspring that ultimately make them mere objects to control. Sadly this condition cannot be treated -- you cannot tell such a parent that it is WRONG to treat their kids like that. They simply DO NOT understand and they will just be offended all the more like: "<deleted> do YOU know about my kids... _I_ am his dad... not you, go f-- off!".

That is, if I'm right about this guy's relationship with his dad. If I'm wrong, I'll take off my tinfoil hat and would gladly apologise to his folks (and kick the shit out of Tom for being such a jerk).

You say in your previous post 'but hey... we don't know all the details yet, do we? ', yet here you are saying what 'probably happened' because you came from a dysfunctional family. You don't know the situation, so all I am saying is stick to the facts. A control freak may well be concerned for their son, but so would a loving parent who has a good relationship with their son. Maybe the son just didn't want to go back to Uni, or didn't want to go back to work or whatever, but its a bit rich labeling the Father a control freak because he was concerned for the sons safety. If this young guy had been murdered you would all be saying..'I can't believe it took the Father so long to raise the alarm, I mean blimey he told them he was flying home two days before the flight'.

By the way as you are an Ajarn, be aware from your last two posts, you are sounding like you have tourette's, are you teaching English?

[Halion]

As far as I am concerned this article is taking the piss. Perhaps the next article will be "Marrie Celleste" arrives safely in Liverpool.

Absolutely the worst peice of reporting i have seen.

[JetsetBkk]

Now concern turns to anger ...

And then retribution...

But of course. It's normal. And he deserves to be given a good smacking.

[renrut salohcin]

And.......?

Don't we get any explanation as to where/why he went missing?

Sent from my GT-I9100T

You do know that he's not obliged to explain his actions to you or anyone?

[Fortunate1]

An irresponsible young man. He needs to grow up.

[Arkady]

What a prat!

I hope the Thai police will present him for a bill for their wasted time, even though they probably didn't bother to do much. Likewise, his father should get him to reimburse his travel expenses. An email informing them of his change of plan would have made things a lot easier.

[Samuimike1]

That's what they meant by "diving school," I guess...

[SteeleJoe]

one can't help but begin to think that perhaps, for whatever personal reasons he may have, that he isn't truly missing, but that he simply doesn't wish to have contact.

While I suspected this was the situation nearly three weeks ago, I was still willing to give him the final benefit and made only my tentative post then only speculative. Tom is certainly not alone in what he did. I've seen the same happen several times before and that is where my suspicions with him originated. It's an incredibly selfish thing to just drop out like that. Not only does it affect his family and friends strongly, it impacts even on complete strangers, who are less experienced in what humans are capable of.

Well, we still don't know whether it was really him and without info on the withdrawals it is impossible to tell if HE was taking money from his account or someone else. I am in Bangkok and would like to help - can't someone just please post the ATM locations and dates they were used at?

Read that, too. Still: we don't know if it's true, if it actually happened, if it really was him.

I find it difficult to help being in Bangkok and not having any further info locationwise.

Just drove past that soi yesterday after the football match - could be he only went there once, you could tell a lot from his withdrawals.

The other results from these selfish actions is that it taints the authorities into being lackadaisical when the next missing person report is filed. Potentially quite dangerous when that one may very well be legitimately missing. It also wastes a tremendous amount of manpower and resources.

If a person wants to drop out and tune in and flop on a beach smoking weed or whatever other nonsense Tomw was up to, go for it, but for God's sake (and those that may worry about you), frickin' let them know that is your intention, so that an international man-hunt isn't generated looking for your selfish ass.

Didn't read the ret of the thread but I want to heartily agree to the above and with those who called him a selfish prick. I feel I am in a position to do so having done the same as he did when I was 19 - long before I had kids of my own I knew what an awful thing it was to do. So while I obviously can see how it happened, I don't think there's any excuse for it.

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

[renrut salohcin]

If this was my son I would see to it he inlisted in the military. After a short time he would find out what respect and responsibility meant. Obviously he is lacking in both.

You couldn't, he's an adult beyond his parents control if that's what he wants.

And having a father with an attitude like yours might explain his actions.

[MaxLee]

Well in the end, it'll be a personal family matter, because on the other hand, it would be understandable why his parents wouldn't want to reveal any personal secret matters to the public, I mean, things that a lot of us are anxious to know, like "background, son-to-parents-relationship, reason for his disappearance, etc...

[crazykopite]

The lad has a lot of explaining to do for putting his family through such an ordeal If he were mine I would be kicking his arse big time but suppose that is the young people of today do not give a hoot about others I always used to say to my kids is if your going to be delayed a simple txt or phonecall will put us at our ease !!!!!!!!!!

[Tanlic]

Now concern turns to anger ...

"Thank God you are OK"

"Why the f didn't you tell us that is what you wanted to do, you selfish @H?????"

I think that is quite a natural reaction for his family and friends to have.

The guy is not a 12 yo kid deciding to play hide and seek at the mall and taking it too far. He is old enough to decide what he wanted to do, but if he had a brain he would have cared about not making others suffer.

Having said all that, there may still be some information that we don't know and might explain things, but it seems highly unlikely.

That's exactly where I'm coming from. I have a 23 yr old son. If he pulled a stunt like this I'd be beside myself until I knew he was ok. But if it turns out he was goofing off without any regard for his family it would turn to anger very quickly.

But "my boy" would never do anything like this ....... Says naive parent ....

Love It

[sfbandung]

Now concern turns to anger ...

Amazing.......and that without knowing the exact reason for his "missing"-situation.

Judging without knowing any back-ground, that's what people good at here!!

Not judging at all Joe. Just following what the logical progression would be from a parent's perspective.

You're right. We know only a small percentage of the whole story. But if I was a betting man ... Missing, big search, found "safe and well" ...