A Most Unusual And As Yet Unexplained Disappearance Of My Thai Wife

[keystone]

Having been married to a Thai National for the past 35 years, a most unusual and unexplained event occured.

Since I have been married to a Thai back in 1978, we resided in the UK where she was able to obtain a British passport and also kept her Thai passport up to date.

In January 2002 we decided to relocate to Thailand where I purchased a townhouse for my wife in her name.

Approximately three weeks ago, she sold the house without telling me and disappeared, to where, I have no idea and no contact has been made between myself and my wife. In this respect, I am now searching to purchase a condo/apartment in possibly Hua Hin and I'm on a Retirement extension which I renew annually, and also I have no children so there is not problem for myself to remain in Thailand.

I have initially spoken to Thai friends regarding my seeking a divorce from my wife but I understand both spouses have to be present at Ampur to finalise divorce proceedings.

I further understand that I will have to report all the facts to the police in order that a record can be kept of this occurance. I have also been told that filing this report, I will not be able to divorce my wife and remarry if I decide to do so at sometime in the future, until after five years have elapsed.

As yet, I have done nothing, only to speak to various Thai friends

I would mention that this unusual breakup is nothing to do with being unfaithful, that's the unusual part of it.

Looking forward to anyone out there who can offer some comments on this situation.

PS Marriage to my Thai wife was only in Thailand and not the UK.

[Mario2008]

You should report her disapearence to the police.

After 1 year you can file for a divorce at the Thai courts if she has deserted you. If she has disappeared, it can be after 3 years.

[lopburi3]

Are you in Thailand or the UK now? It would seem very strange that you have not reported this event to the police as she may well have been kidnapped or scammed into this action.

[uptheos]

As it is known that three weeks ago she sold a house, I doubt if she would be classed as a missing person. However, as been said she could be the victim of a scam or something else.

You say you both returned in 2002 and bought a townhouse for her; quote "In January 2002 we decided to relocate to Thailand", which I presume you both lived in?

Did no one come to look at it, were no suspicions aroused, did the new owners kick you out, were you out of the country and what happened when you went there?

The story seems a little incomplete, but I hope you find your wife.

Edited February 26, 2013 by uptheos

[keystone]

No, there was no such scam or kidnapping.

My Thai friends help me move all my personal effects from the house (all of which I paid for and have receipts).

Yes, I am still in Thailand and will remain so.

Whilst moving personal effects, it appears that her friends in the village knew that she had sold the house, in fact, to the next door neighbour. It was only me that was unaware of the sale.

I will today be reporting her as missing to the police and file the necessary report for their record. I will take along to the station, a copies of marriage cert (Thai/English), blue book (house now sold), her ID card and British passport, my British passport together with relevant info, i.e. Retirement extension page.

I was away at the time of her disappearance but noticed that she had taken my video camera (an expensive item).

All her clothes were left in the house.

Furthermore, I know that the proceeds from the house sale was paid to her in cash.

Most unusual and at this time, unexplained.

I will keep you informed once I visit the police station. I will have a Thai friend to accompany me.

[transam]

No, there was no such scam or kidnapping.

My Thai friends help me move all my personal effects from the house (all of which I paid for and have receipts).

Yes, I am still in Thailand and will remain so.

Whilst moving personal effects, it appears that her friends in the village knew that she had sold the house, in fact, to the next door neighbour. It was only me that was unaware of the sale.

I will today be reporting her as missing to the police and file the necessary report for their record. I will take along to the station, a copies of marriage cert (Thai/English), blue book (house now sold), her ID card and British passport, my British passport together with relevant info, i.e. Retirement extension page.

I was away at the time of her disappearance but noticed that she had taken my video camera (an expensive item).

All her clothes were left in the house.

Furthermore, I know that the proceeds from the house sale was paid to her in cash.

Most unusual and at this time, unexplained.

I will keep you informed once I visit the police station. I will have a Thai friend to accompany me.

Half that cash is yours.

[Morakot]

Since she is also a British citizen, you might also like to report this unusual disappearance to the embassy.

[jambco984]

No, there was no such scam or kidnapping.

My Thai friends help me move all my personal effects from the house (all of which I paid for and have receipts).

Yes, I am still in Thailand and will remain so.

Whilst moving personal effects, it appears that her friends in the village knew that she had sold the house, in fact, to the next door neighbour. It was only me that was unaware of the sale.

I will today be reporting her as missing to the police and file the necessary report for their record. I will take along to the station, a copies of marriage cert (Thai/English), blue book (house now sold), her ID card and British passport, my British passport together with relevant info, i.e. Retirement extension page.

I was away at the time of her disappearance but noticed that she had taken my video camera (an expensive item).

All her clothes were left in the house.

Furthermore, I know that the proceeds from the house sale was paid to her in cash.

Most unusual and at this time, unexplained.

I will keep you informed once I visit the police station. I will have a Thai friend to accompany me.

Half that cash is yours.

True and not in the you cant buy or own a house sense but your married and it "SHOULD" be a 50/50 split. If she has sold the house already.

Good luck in finding her and getting some answers.

[SteeleJoe]

I would mention that this unusual breakup is nothing to do with being unfaithful, that's the unusual part of it.

No disrespect intended, but how do you know?

I'm not interested in prying but if you want useful input, people need as much info as you care to give: it seems to me that an understanding of WHY this happened might be helpful - have you no idea whatsoever? Again, not wishing to intrude on your privacy but the health and nature of the relationship would seem relevant.

If your neighbors knew the house was sold, I'm betting some of them and/or your wife's friends/family know where she went and why. I should you or certainly a professional investigator could get answers or find a trail...

On the other hand's not entirely clear to me what you want - do you even CARE where she is?

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

[keystone]

So what you guys have told me, I should have received half of the proceeds on the sale of the house.

For your information, I have proof, i,e, bank papers that I transferred the money to my wife's account to purchase the house which was back in 2002..

Can anybody confirm for sure that I am entitled to half of the proceeds? If this is the case, that is something I can add to the police report.

[transam]

So what you guys have told me, I should have received half of the proceeds on the sale of the house.

For your information, I have proof, i,e, bank papers that I transferred the money to my wife's account to purchase the house which was back in 2002..

Can anybody confirm for sure that I am entitled to half of the proceeds? If this is the case, that is something I can add to the police report.

Get divorced at your Amphur, though she must be present and reveal your combined assets during marriage. 50/50. BUT, as she isn't around then yes show all to the police.

[keystone]

I would mention that this unusual breakup is nothing to do with being unfaithful, that's the unusual part of it.

No disrespect intended, but how do you know?

I'm not interested in prying but if you want useful input, people need as much info as you care to give: it seems to me that an understanding of WHY this happened might be helpful - have you no idea whatsoever? Again, not wishing to intrude on your privacy but the health and nature of the relationship would seem relevant.

If your neighbors knew the house was sold, I'm betting some of them and/or your wife's friends/family know where she went and why. I should you or certainly a professional investigator could get answers or find a trail...

On the other hand's not entirely clear to me what you want - do you even CARE where she is?

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

Hi SteeleJoe.

I should have said that it wasn't a case of being unfaithful on MY PART. I would also say that the same applied to my wife as she very rarely left the house other than to carry out shopping trips.

How can I give an understanding as to what really happened when I don't know. I would suggest you re-read the subject heading of this thread. To me it's a complete mystery.

With reference to any of the persons that live in the village know where my wife is, only one person has said that she is possibly with a friend in Bangna and I understand, if I so wish, there is no problem to hire a PI if it ever comes to that and yes, I do care.

I would suggest SJ you do no reply.

[wooloomooloo]

So what you guys have told me, I should have received half of the proceeds on the sale of the house.

For your information, I have proof, i,e, bank papers that I transferred the money to my wife's account to purchase the house which was back in 2002..

Can anybody confirm for sure that I am entitled to half of the proceeds? If this is the case, that is something I can add to the police report.

Get divorced at your Amphur, though she must be present and reveal your combined assets during marriage. 50/50. BUT, as she isn't around then yes show all to the police.

This could actually be more expensive for you, keystone. 50/50 of everything.

Effectively you are not entitled to half of the proceeds if the house was in your wife's name, which it appears to have been.

I would think this through.

[Mario2008]

Division of assets does not take place until there is a divorce.

[wooloomooloo]

That's my point, Mario. If keystone's wife were to be located and they divorce then she is entitled to 50% of everything.

Keystone - do the math.

[SteeleJoe]

I would mention that this unusual breakup is nothing to do with being unfaithful, that's the unusual part of it.

No disrespect intended, but how do you know?

I'm not interested in prying but if you want useful input, people need as much info as you care to give: it seems to me that an understanding of WHY this happened might be helpful - have you no idea whatsoever? Again, not wishing to intrude on your privacy but the health and nature of the relationship would seem relevant.

If your neighbors knew the house was sold, I'm betting some of them and/or your wife's friends/family know where she went and why. I should you or certainly a professional investigator could get answers or find a trail...

On the other hand's not entirely clear to me what you want - do you even CARE where she is?

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

Hi SteeleJoe.

I should have said that it wasn't a case of being unfaithful on MY PART. I would also say that the same applied to my wife as she very rarely left the house other than to carry out shopping trips.

How can I give an understanding as to what really happened when I don't know. I would suggest you re-read the subject heading of this thread. To me it's a complete mystery.

With reference to any of the persons that live in the village know where my wife is, only one person has said that she is possibly with a friend in Bangna and I understand, if I so wish, there is no problem to hire a PI if it ever comes to that and yes, I do care.

I would suggest SJ you do no reply.

Sorry, I don't understand why you don't want me to reply, I reserve the right to respond to what people post publicly and especially if it's addressed to me.

I read the topic heading. I simply wondered if you could not give any more info or some sort of context.

Given that you made no mention of concern and mentioned only practicalities of tour situation it wasn't clear to me if you were interested in what your wife has done and why but were being admirably calm and collected (more than I'd be able to manage in such a situation) or if the relationship was not a good one and you were merely interested in the legalities and finances I and such (nothing wrong with that). Sorry if that bothered you for some reason but I didn't make any assumptions about you, your wife, or the relationship and I wasn't rude to you.

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

[Mario2008]

He cannot divorce at the amphur, as for that both must consent. Since she cannot be found, the only way to divorce at this moment is through the courts.

That means a division of assets gained during the marriage, inlcuding debts. What one had before is left out.

At the amphur, one can negotiate a different divion of assets and enter that into the divorce register.

[wooloomooloo]

Indeed, Mario. I want keystone to think broader than half of the money from the sale of the house.

And seeing as he has been married for 35 years now, I'm sure he has potentially more to lose than just the sale of said house.

[TommoPhysicist]

Furthermore, I know that the proceeds from the house sale was paid to her in cash.

Most unusual and at this time, unexplained.

I will keep you informed once I visit the police station. I will have a Thai friend to accompany me.

Not unusual, the house was a joint asset, and you could have insisted on half the money, if it were traceable.

She did cash to steal your half of the joint asset.

Not to mention, if you buy a condo she will have half of that too.

After a marriage of 35 years everything discoverable is a joint asset.

Move any money you have, sell any property you have.

Edited February 26, 2013 by TommoPhysicist

[rijb]

The op is searching for a place to live. But, has he really searched for her?

[keystone]

Thanks Wool and Mario.

I am still proceeding to the police station today to file this report and I will let you know what transpires.

The way I see it is if my wife has permanently disappeared and there is no way that I/we can file for divorce until after 3 years then I will not get my 50% sale proceeds until that time and of course I will have to give her 50% of all my assets at that time.

To repeat my story, my wife sold the house, pocketed all of the proceeds and disappeared. She told friends in the village that she sold the house but definitely did not tell me.

Having said that, Okay I am going to file a police report in the meanwhile, what if she spends all of the house proceeds or even opens a business (it wont last forever) and in the future and makes contact with me asking for money?

[wooloomooloo]

Thanks, keystone. That was the point I was trying to convey. I've had too much of the PHS sun on my head this morning.

Anyway, good luck.

[TommoPhysicist]

Thanks Wool and Mario.

I am still proceeding to the police station today to file this report and I will let you know what transpires.

The way I see it is if my wife has permanently disappeared and there is no way that I/we can file for divorce until after 3 years then I will not get my 50% sale proceeds until that time and of course I will have to give her 50% of all my assets at that time.

To repeat my story, my wife sold the house, pocketed all of the proceeds and disappeared. She told friends in the village that she sold the house but definitely did not tell me.

Having said that, Okay I am going to file a police report in the meanwhile, what if she spends all of the house proceeds or even opens a business (it wont last forever) and in the future and makes contact with me asking for money?

After a marriage this long, your best bet is to cash everything in, move your money outside Thailand or your home country, and move leaving no forwarding address. After 1 year you can divorce her for abandonment.

[Morakot]

Most people in their mid-fifties[+] don't just disappear after 35 years of marriage. Most unusual, indeed!

Edited February 26, 2013 by Morakot

[keystone]

Thanks Wool and Mario.

I am still proceeding to the police station today to file this report and I will let you know what transpires.

The way I see it is if my wife has permanently disappeared and there is no way that I/we can file for divorce until after 3 years then I will not get my 50% sale proceeds until that time and of course I will have to give her 50% of all my assets at that time.

To repeat my story, my wife sold the house, pocketed all of the proceeds and disappeared. She told friends in the village that she sold the house but definitely did not tell me.

Having said that, Okay I am going to file a police report in the meanwhile, what if she spends all of the house proceeds or even opens a business (it wont last forever) and in the future and makes contact with me asking for money?

After a marriage this long, your best bet is to cash everything in, move your money outside Thailand or your home country, and move leaving no forwarding address. After 1 year you can divorce her for abandonment.

I will not be leaving Thailand, I will remain here.

Having heard all your very helpful comments and having spoken to some of my Thai friends, I believe and I think the courts, if it comes to that will believe that my wife was very bad in that SHE SOLD THE HOUSE WITHOUT TELLING ME, RECEIVED THE WHOLE OF THE PROCEEDS IN CASH AND DISAPPEARED. Would you then expect your wife to receive half of your assets on divorce......think about it.

[keystone]

Most people in their mid-fifties[+] don't just disappear after 35 years of marriage. Most unusual, indeed!

Yes Morakot, agree, very unusual as per the subject of this thread and yet to be explained. I believe there is a lot more to this. Something on her part is very very wrong and I don't know as yet what this is.

[wooloomooloo]

The rest aside, keystone, it's a horrible situation for you, the not knowing why, the deceit, particularly after thirty-five years of marriage. I was still in junior school in 1978.

I wouldn't wish your present situation on my enemies. Take care.

[TommoPhysicist]

Having heard all your very helpful comments and having spoken to some of my Thai friends, I believe and I think the courts, if it comes to that will believe that my wife was very bad in that SHE SOLD THE HOUSE WITHOUT TELLING ME, RECEIVED THE WHOLE OF THE PROCEEDS IN CASH AND DISAPPEARED. Would you then expect your wife to receive half of your assets on divorce......think about it.

I think the courts would still split the remaining discoverable assets 50/50, that's Thai law. Thai law only considers assets owned at the time of divorce, so a previously sold house (one year in the past) won't be taken into account. While still married there is no set limit on her spending, and the proceeds from a house sale could be spent PDQ.

You also probably signed a document at the land office declaring the property was purchased by her money alone, Sin Suan Tua. which although can be overturned on divorce, won't be if the asset has already gone.

The Thai courts don't care who is good and who is bad, they split assets on divorce using a set formula.

PS

Sorry to hear of your loss after 35 years.If she is in her early 50's, she could be going through menopause, which can cause a complete and irreversible personality change. In effect she is a completely different woman, maybe one that actively dislikes or hates you. Happened to me in the UK after a 25 year marriage, she was given almost all my UK assets plus half my pension by a UK court. I thought "No they can't give her the whole house", but they did.

PPS

Not too good an idea taking advice from Thai friends

1) They may not be such good friends as you think, Thai rak Thai.

2) Thai people are usually completely (and surprisingly) ignorant of Thai laws.

3) Thai people like to tell others what they want to hear ..... i.e. your remaining assets are safe.

Edited February 26, 2013 by TommoPhysicist

[keystone]

Yes, I am still going to file that report today.

Having carefully thought thru this, the only asset I had in Thailand was the townhouse which I purchased for my wife and every year (in good time before my retirement extension expires) I transfer from my UK bank account to a bank in Thailand an amount to satisfy the renewal of my retirement extension. This money is then transferred back to the UK until the next time.

My assets are in the UK, cash and shares and I live here on my government pension and two personal pensions.

I have decided therefore to RENT a decent condo/apartment in Hua Hin rather than buy.

Am I correct therefore that only assets in Thailand can be shared equally and not assets in the UK?

I must go, the police station awaits.

[keystone]

Having heard all your very helpful comments and having spoken to some of my Thai friends, I believe and I think the courts, if it comes to that will believe that my wife was very bad in that SHE SOLD THE HOUSE WITHOUT TELLING ME, RECEIVED THE WHOLE OF THE PROCEEDS IN CASH AND DISAPPEARED. Would you then expect your wife to receive half of your assets on divorce......think about it.

I think the courts would still split the remaining discoverable assets 50/50, that's Thai law. Thai law only considers assets owned at the time of divorce, so a previously sold house (one year in the past) won't be taken into account. While still married there is no set limit on her spending, and the proceeds from a house sale could be spent PDQ.

You also probably signed a document at the land office declaring the property was purchased by her money alone, Sin Suan Tua. which although can be overturned on divorce, won't be if the asset has already gone.

The Thai courts don't care who is good and who is bad, they split assets on divorce using a set formula.

PS

Sorry to hear of your loss after 35 years.If she is in her early 50's, she could be going through menopause, which can cause a complete and irreversible personality change. In effect she is a completely different woman, maybe one that actively dislikes or hates you. Happened to me in the UK after a 25 year marriage, she was given almost all my UK assets plus half my pension by a UK court. I thought "No they can't give her the whole house", but they did.

PPS

Not too good an idea taking advice from Thai friends

1) They may not be such good friends as you think, Thai rak Thai.

2) Thai people are usually completely (and surprisingly) ignorant of Thai laws.

3) Thai people like to tell others what they want to hear ..... i.e. your remaining assets are safe.

Cheers for that Tommo