Never Lend Money

[su-b-doo]

Hi Members

Any advice, apart from don’t lend any money. About 6 month ago I lent 15,000 Baht to a friend who was in great need. Since he has had money to go out drinking, but never offered to repay my money. I have since asked for him to pay me back, and in return he made serious threats to my life, of course I reported this to the police, and to my horror they simply said for me to carry a knife for protection. The worst thing of all is that he is my neighbour in an open plan complex; I have since made myself a hermit, keeping out of his way. Well some good news and bad, he is about to go home, but I will not see my money, for which I need to pay lawyers fees for a custody case for my 5 year old son.

Is there anything I can do to get my money back, there is no contract I lent the money in good faith.

[bkkmadness]

I think legally you are screwed dude, coz no contract at all. You made a mistake, and unless you want to take illegal action against this dude which I wouldn't advise then better just forget it.

[britmaveric]

Right it off as a lesson learned. Lending dosh is a not adviseable without a contract/collateral, and even then thats not a guaranteed of repayment.

[davethailand]

Well luckily its only 15000bht but personally i'd see that he gets a slap so whilst he sits on the plane hurting he'll realize what a bastard he's been.

When i first came i lent a guy i'd met and drank with for 6 months a grand (sterling), we had a proper deal set up and everything, he went back to the UK and i stayed in pattaya, it took 2 years to get it back plus 400 quid interest that he promised and was made to pay.

To top all this we've been friendly since and he still owes me 2000bht which is ok for a while but he had the cheek to drink in the soi where my bar is and use my name as a guarantee for paying his bill another day (which he has'nt) .

He's a <deleted> because he told me himself that he has 3 months overstay.

Shame if he gets caught though?

Edited March 6, 2006 by davethailand

[Gary74]

FYI, you are one of many who have done this and got shafted.

15,000 bhat isn't that bad. I know of 2 cases from the same guy who lent 100,00 and 150,000 bhat to another farang from the goodness of his heart and expected both of them to pay it back but they never did. The plan was to make monthly payments but they just never came back and avoided him like the plague. Going to police isn't going to do anything. They will just laugh at you.

Even 100K and 150K isn't that bad compare to several farangs that I know who lost everything including houses, trucks, cars and bank accounts to their former bar girl wives who put everything under their names. These fools are too embarassed to come back and be seen and be rediculed by other farangs.

Don't expect him to pay 15K back but tell others who know him what he did so that others don't get screwed as well. This will piss that guy off and get some steam off of you.

This goes to tell you, NEVER and I mean NEVER let others borough money from you. This goes for farangs and Thais as well.

Edited March 6, 2006 by Gary74

[Super Villian]

Not everyone is the same, i think i probably owe my TGF around 200,000 batt and she has never asked for it back and when i tried to pay her see didn't even want it, she hates her own culture because of people like this. It is very sad to see that even when you think you know a person they can turn on you.

If i was in your shoes, i would make sure he learn't to never bite the hand that feeds you.

Edited March 6, 2006 by Super Villian

[BambinA]

Never Lend Money

no never .... money makes people have prob with friend relative ..etc ..

its hard to ask friend .."hey ..its the deal, date line ,u need to paid me back" ..etc..and he /she says.."oh no ... could u wait a while?" after that no news from him, her..but new news = you are stingy

never talk about religion 'n politic also

[bkkmadness]

Not everyone is the same, i think i probably owe my TGF around 200,000 baht

And the half time score is: Farangs 1 - Thais 64928865

Well done that man!

yeah yeah yeah, you know I'm all joking, no flames please.

[englishoak]

if money was not a problem I'm sure the local boy's would be pleased to teach a lesson.

guy A I knew lent out about £1,000 to a long standing resident in bkk... after about 6mths with all the excuses and finally a couple of threats to his person guy A has had enough.... spent about 3000bht on drugs planted it in the offenders condo & called the police there is a dealer living there....

It could have been nasty but the t***er got off with deportation only

[paulfr]

Well I must be the lucky one.

I loaned 20,000THB to someone and got it back just as promised.

It was a friend of my wife who had done her some wonderful favors

in the past and we felt we owed her.

However, I first made my wife find out EXACTLY how she planned to repay us

and the answer made sense.

In general, the advice here is good though.

I think my case was unusual.

Be very careful when considering loaning money to anyone.

[lampard10]

I think our case may be worse, although not so much money. About the time we opened, a Swedish guy, one of our friends, lets call him Magnus, only because that was his real name, fell short of money, and had his bank card eaten bt the ATM. We lent him enough to get himself sorted out, with the promise that as his bank card had been lost, as soon as his new one came he would re-pay us. We also let him eat and drink free in the pub during this time.After he had gone, we found out that he had borrowed money off of about 20 different people in the pub. Now this is where it gets nasty.

People started coming to us for their money. It seems he had telephoned everybody that he owed money to, and told them he had sent us all the money he owed in one package. Anyone know a chap like that?

[pnustedt]

My wife's father used to lend money when she was a child. He was murdered by his creditors - apparently this was more expedient than paying back the debt.

[wolf5370]

I only ever lend money to dear friends who I wouldn't mind not paying back (and only lend them what I can afford to loose) - always been paid back to date. Also have borrowed from the same people and paid them back too. Only one friend never paid me back - and I don't lend to him any more (he;s Thai, but them so are many of the others I'm talking about in this para).

I have some "friends" that make a mint out of lending money. They are Thais. They lend money, but hold land as deposits. Its incredible how some people will loose their land for not paying back 200 Baht!

Shakespeare knew all about it:

"Neither a borrower, nor a lender be; For loan oft loses both itself and friend" - Hamlet Act I, Scene III

[Gary A]

A friend of my wife needed money. My wife asked me to make the loan. I asked my wife to find out what the gal had for security. I loaned the lady 12,000 baht and held 1 1/2 baht of gold until she paid the money back. (She did pay it back). The lady wanted 15,000 and I told her that the gold was only worth 12,000 to me.

[Larryst]

Never loan money to anyone. Good way to lose friends. My livein loan money to the next door neighbor 10,000 baht. He's a policeman. He said he would pay it back within 1 or 2 months. 12 months later he still owes 4,000 baht. He always says he has some problems. Eventually she will get the money from him. She and a couple other thais complained to his boss. I think they will get the money out of him. One way or the other.

One way to lose a friend. Loan money to him. Also never work with a relative. Another way to get screwed. I did and my brother ######ed me over. Worked for him for awhole summer and when it was time to get paid, he said he has problems. He then told me to ###### off.

You can pick out your friends, but you can't pick out your relatives.

[English Noodles]

I think it's a personal thing, you should certainly be careful about who you loan money to if you decide to. It all depends on your relationship with the person and circumstances at the time.

I agree with wolf, if you cant afford to lose it then dont loan it to anyone.

Hey i once gave a person a loan of B5000 knowing i would never get it back. The reason i did this was because to me B5000 was a fair price to have this person avoid me in the future.

[donna]

never lend anything you cant afford to not get back

[Thaising]

A friend try to borrow money from me. I told him no problem, but first let me take a foto of him, when he asks me why. I just say if he didn't repay the loan I will put his picture on the internet. Immediately his turn face red and walk away.

[Swelters]

And teach your wife/gf not to lend any either.

Made about half a dozen major loans in my life, never been paid back by anyone.

[the gent]

And teach your wife/gf not to lend any either.

Made about half a dozen major loans in my life, never been paid back by anyone.

Hey Buddy,

Would you like to make that 7 ?

[danone]

never lend without being given some collateral, such as car registration book, tabien baan, whatever. and let them sign a paper signed by at least three witnesses. paper has to be written in thai. even though lawyers and police may not convince the guy who owes you, you got something more in your hand than a simple promise.

[GuestHouse]

I have no problem at all telling anyone "I DO NOT LEND MONEY". I say this right up front as soon as the subject is brought up.

But here's a caution. A neighbour of mine nearly lost everything he had when he discovered to his horror that his wife had stood as guarantor for her sister and her brother-in-law.

They borrowed money, my neighbour's wife singed the credit with her and her husband's house as collateral and the rest was a sorry tale of having to pay off someone else’s loans and a huge set of legal/bank charges.

So it is not just a matter of do not lend money, far more important is...

NEVER STAND AS GUARANTOR FOR ANYONE.

and make sure your wife doesn’t either.

Lending money puts the money at risk, perhaps a risk you are willing to take, but standing as Guarantor puts everything at risk... something many people seem to not understand. And something Thais don't always consider when 'Helping the family'.

Edited March 7, 2006 by GuestHouse

[Swelters]

And teach your wife/gf not to lend any either.

Made about half a dozen major loans in my life, never been paid back by anyone.

Hey Buddy,

Would you like to make that 7 ?

I'm on full alert. Guy I drink beer with, he's always giving me cigarettes, I know there's gotta be an angle.

[COBBER]

Never lend money to friends. Only lend money to people you want to get rid of.

Any layabout freeloading thai relatives that you might want to get rid of , just lend them a small amount of money and there is a good chance you will never see them again. It works a treat and a lot cheaper in the long run.

Also when the subject of lending money to someone in need comes up you can use this as a good reason to say no.

[astral]

There is one born every day.

"Neither a borrower, nor a lender be", is what my good old Mum taught me.

[stumonster]

I will lend money to whom I wish , and when I wish.

I have had a mate help me out of the shit before , and because I appreciated his assistance I made sure I paid.

If you have scum for mates - get new ones

or maybe you need to evaluate yourself and wonder why friends you have....

[bkkmadness]

I will lend money to whom I wish , and when I wish.

I have had a mate help me out of the shit before , and because I appreciated his assistance I made sure I paid.

If you have scum for mates - get new ones

or maybe you need to evaluate yourself and wonder why friends you have....

I agree. All these people who will not lend money to friends makes me think that they haven't chosen very good friends.

[su-b-doo]

This guy is British and looks like a brick shit house, no matter what I do, I think it will come back to me, as although he is going back to the UK he is coming back to thailand. I don't want to move but I hate the fact that because of his size he acts like he owns the place.

[Noel]

I will lend money to whom I wish , and when I wish.

I have had a mate help me out of the shit before , and because I appreciated his assistance I made sure I paid.

If you have scum for mates - get new ones

or maybe you need to evaluate yourself and wonder why friends you have....

Brave words indeed!

Whilst I can appreciate your point of view to a certain extent, it is not quite as simple as that IMHO.

You may be surprised to learn that not everyone treads the same moral high ground as yourself.

There are many possible causal factors as to why an otherwise good friend will behave in a way that you would never have imagined. One obvious point to bear in mind is that the friendship may not actually be as mutual as first thought.

At the end of the day, different people may have different value systems concerning friendship.

On the basis that only a good friend would come to a perceived mutually good friend and ask for money when they are desperate, why is the friend approached not aware of the problems and able to advise well in advance of the crisis point?

Perhaps they were not such good friends after all...

[lampard10]

I had a good mate of mine run drastically short of funds in Israel. He asked me for a loan.

I said " When will I see it again ?"

" He said " How should I know that. Maybe never"

I lent him it.

I ran into him five years later at Lasham in Hampshire, when I was short. He repaid me in full and lent me some more on top.