Seen on a toilet wall in Basle:

Brittannia's are better than DC 10"s

Because four screws beats three blow jobs any day.

Funny!

Are there Britannias still flying?

I last flew on one in 1960.

(But I do know that a DC4 that I flew on then (and it had already quite a long and hard life) is still flying as a tanker in the Canadian Arctic.

Well I enjoyed it and understood it.

I don't think there are any whispering giants flying any more. Shame ! Always prefered the DC-10 to the L1011 but I suppose I'm being a bit of an anorak.

Well I enjoyed it and understood it.

I don't think there are any whispering giants flying any more. Shame ! Always prefered the DC-10 to the L1011 but I suppose I'm being a bit of an anorak.

Er, yes you are

I have been searching back down Memory Lane, and recall that it was in June 1960 that I last flew on a Britannia. It was from Montreal to London, via refuelling stops at Gander and Prestwick.

Two weeks later, I flew back on a 707.

Admittedly, it was very lightly loaded, (only half-a-dozen passengers and little fuel, as it was to pick up fuel at Prestwick), but the rate of climb on take-off from Heathrow was breathtaking to a young man who was used to lumbering off behind props.

BOAC had just put that flight on, and so there hadn't been time for the travel agents to get them many customers, hence the empty seats.

And so it was a dream----up front on the flight deck chatting with the flight engineer whilst on the ground at Prestwick, and then again over the Atlantic for a good spell.

And then back in the rear, showing the lasses pictures of eskimos and telling them what it was like in the land of miles and miles of nothing but miles and miles.

'Twas a good time to be twentyfive.

At Dorval, I looked back at the apron and compared the 707 and a Britannia.

Although the Brit was prettier to my eye, I knew that I had seen the future---and it belonged to the big jets.

I have been searching back down Memory Lane, and recall that it was in June 1960 that I last flew on a Britannia. It was from Montreal to London, via refuelling stops at Gander and Prestwick.

If it was that route it would have more than likely been a CL44, built by Canadair to Bristol standards. Did you also know that the old jigs and bits left over from the Brittannia were used to build the Belfast? That was one reason why they only ever made 12 or 13.

This is the last photo of a flying Brittania I can find.

http://www.airliners.net/open.file/0545313/M/

1997 on it's last day of service.

If you want to fly a real classic, Saha Air in Iran still flys regular schedualed 707 passenger service. These aren't like the hush-kitted cargo conversions, they are the original ear-splitting smokey engines that first equipped the aircraft.

Here's a photo taken just over a month ago.

http://www.airliners.net/open.file/1012789/M/

cv

This is the last photo of a flying Brittania I can find.

http://www.airliners.net/open.file/0545313/M/

1997 on it's last day of service.

If you want to fly a real classic, Saha Air in Iran still flys regular schedualed 707 passenger service. These aren't like the hush-kitted cargo conversions, they are the original ear-splitting smokey engines that first equipped the aircraft.

Here's a photo taken just over a month ago.

http://www.airliners.net/open.file/1012789/M/

cv

Couldn't view these Links cv, are they members only?

For 'lampard10', re #7:

It was a BOAC flight, so I assume it was Bristol, rather than Canadair, built.

I never knew much about the Belfast, but re-using those jigs would have made sense.

I believe that the Ambassador car that is/was so popular in India started with the Morris Oxford drawings, jigs, production line and all being shipped out there when the British production ceases.

The IH B250 tractor production carried on in India, after it ceased in Bradford in the former-Jowett factory in the early 1980's, and I saw a new one near Silguri in 1997.

Also, at the auction when IH packed in in Bradford, there were pre-WWII machine tools being purchased to go to India for re-furbishment.

It had been used on the 1930s Jowett cars, munitions work, the Javelin and the Jupiter and then B250 tractors, and I wouldn't be surprised if some is still earning its keep 70 years from new (unlike me!).

Which reminds me of a story that went the rounds a few years ago.

When the DVLC got its computer facilities at Swansea, a newspaper reporter asked who was the oldest person with a driving licence.

It was a 94-year-old man.

He explained that he needed the licence, as he had to drive to work each day.

Re #8 & #9:

The links worked for me; and I have 'bookmarked' that site.

You chaps put some superb photos on the web.

But this old boy still re-reads 'Fate Is The Hunter', too.

As to 707s. About ten years ago, the best (most comfortable and cheap) way from LHR to SIN was via Karachi with PIA.

They were still flying 707s, but had a weight restriction and were leaving a big block of seats empty.

By getting a seat next to that block, one could make a swift move as soon as the 'belts' sign went off, and then go the rest of the sector sleeping stretched out full length.

For 'lampard10', re #7:

It was a BOAC flight, so I assume it was Bristol, rather than Canadair, built.

I never knew much about the Belfast, but re-using those jigs would have made sense.

I believe that the Ambassador car that is/was so popular in India started with the Morris Oxford drawings, jigs, production line and all being shipped out there when the British production ceases.

The IH B250 tractor production carried on in India, after it ceased in Bradford in the former-Jowett factory in the early 1980's, and I saw a new one near Silguri in 1997.

Also, at the auction when IH packed in in Bradford, there were pre-WWII machine tools being purchased to go to India for re-furbishment.

It had been used on the 1930s Jowett cars, munitions work, the Javelin and the Jupiter and then B250 tractors, and I wouldn't be surprised if some is still earning its keep 70 years from new (unlike me!).

Which reminds me of a story that went the rounds a few years ago.

When the DVLC got its computer facilities at Swansea, a newspaper reporter asked who was the oldest person with a driving licence.

It was a 94-year-old man.

He explained that he needed the licence, as he had to drive to work each day.

Re #8 & #9:

The links worked for me; and I have 'bookmarked' that site.

You chaps put some superb photos on the web.

But this old boy still re-reads 'Fate Is The Hunter', too.

As to 707s. About ten years ago, the best (most comfortable and cheap) way from LHR to SIN was via Karachi with PIA.

They were still flying 707s, but had a weight restriction and were leaving a big block of seats empty.

By getting a seat next to that block, one could make a swift move as soon as the 'belts' sign went off, and then go the rest of the sector sleeping stretched out full length.

It's funny we are on about these two types of Aircraft, as I was both a Brittannia and a 707 ground engineer. For many years I worked at Manston, nr Ramsgate, which was a plane spotters paradise for old kites. There are still a few 70's flying, but few fitted with the original JT3D's. Most now, like the DC8's are fitted with CF56's. Saying that, the 707's I used to work on at first were fitted with Conways. I always thought that the 707 was the finest kite ever built, but a senior Boeing Engineer that is in Surin for a few days now, reckons the DC8 is a better all round machine. I suppose he should know.

Couldn't view these Links cv, are they members only?

Maybe. Try this one. and this one.

The search page is open to non-members. http://www.airliners.net/search/

cv

I didn't get it at first. Thought britannia was a ship and only had two screws, but now I know better.

We seem to have gone a bit far from the joke-puzzles-riddles category.

Are aircraft enthusiasts a community? Maybe the mods would give us our own forum????

We seem to have gone a bit far from the joke-puzzles-riddles category.

Are aircraft enthusiasts a community? Maybe the mods would give us our own forum????

Now that would be a joke!