Are You Faithful To Your Partner?

[george]

Valentines Day Poll: Are you faithful to your partner?

Three of four Thai husbands unfaithful: poll

BANGKOK : A survey has revealed that some 75 percent of Thai husbands are unfaithful to their wives, a report said on Saturday in a Valentine's Day blow to the sanctity of marriage.

The survey of 1,069 men conducted by the respected ABAC university polling agency showed that 75 percent of respondents admitted to extramarital relations, either sexual or non-sexual, the Bangkok Post reported.

About 66 percent said they had sex with other women, including 21 percent boasting they had sex outside of marriage more than 20 times last year, while 53 percent put their annual extramarital romps at five or fewer.

The partners in the trysts included sex workers, friends and work colleagues, according to poll results released in the English-language daily.

More than one if four said they buy sex, while 10 percent keep mistresses.

Just 68 percent of the philandering men said they used contraception every time, while about 10 percent of them admitted they faced unwanted pregnancies, eight percent contracted sexual disease and 35 percent said they encountered financial problems after involvement in an affair.

Asked what drove them to their extramarital affairs, 41 percent said they sought change and excitement, 19 percent complained of their wife's behaviour, and 14 per cent cited family problems.

One in 11 men said their wives knew of their behaviour, while 11 percent predicted they faced divorce if their spouse discovered the liaisons.

Despite their apparent rampant infedility, more than 80 percent of the men said they found it "unacceptable" for married women to have affairs.

A global survey in September by condom manufacturer Durex showed that Thailand's racy reputation is apparently well-earned, with the kingdom's citizens ranked the happiest with their sex lives in the world.

- AFP 2004-02-14

[Bluecat]

Valentines Day Poll: Are you faithful to your partner?

Three of four Thai husbands unfaithful: poll

BANGKOK : A survey has revealed that some 75 percent of Thai husbands are unfaithful to their wives, a report said on Saturday in a Valentine's Day blow to the sanctity of marriage.

The survey of 1,069 men conducted by the respected ABAC university polling agency showed that 75 percent of respondents admitted to extramarital relations, either sexual or non-sexual, the Bangkok Post reported.

About 66 percent said they had sex with other women, including 21 percent boasting they had sex outside of marriage more than 20 times last year, while 53 percent put their annual extramarital romps at five or fewer.

The partners in the trysts included sex workers, friends and work colleagues, according to poll results released in the English-language daily.

More than one if four said they buy sex, while 10 percent keep mistresses.

Just 68 percent of the philandering men said they used contraception every time, while about 10 percent of them admitted they faced unwanted pregnancies, eight percent contracted sexual disease and 35 percent said they encountered financial problems after involvement in an affair.

Asked what drove them to their extramarital affairs, 41 percent said they sought change and excitement, 19 percent complained of their wife's behaviour, and 14 per cent cited family problems.

One in 11 men said their wives knew of their behaviour, while 11 percent predicted they faced divorce if their spouse discovered the liaisons.

Despite their apparent rampant infedility, more than 80 percent of the men said they found it "unacceptable" for married women to have affairs.

A global survey in September by condom manufacturer Durex showed that Thailand's racy reputation is apparently well-earned, with the kingdom's citizens ranked the happiest with their sex lives in the world.

- AFP 2004-02-14

Surprise, surprise,...

[Bluecat]

Having mia noi was made illegal in Thailand in the 1930s.

Drinking alcohol was made illegal in US in the 1920s.

Did the American stop drinking?

[Girlfrombar]

know what and what knows,

personally i would not mind if my husband would sometimes have sexual intercourse with a service girl

just becoz it is like trading. **(in which not as unrespectful sense)

as long as it's about 'money' factor

when u are in demand (sex) and u get the supply (service girl)

supply meets demand, the result is satisfaction.

i know i know,

things always go more complicated than that shallow example

but pls narrow down a bit

anyway

having minor wifes or secret lovers, is unacceptable

what is the reason for couple tied the knot?

as for mine, to be lifetime friends.. to live to love to life of each other!

so everything will break down if i found that i was cheated (and shitted also)

opposite to having found my guy with sex trade, i would feel the psychological love and fedelity are still.

last of all,

i think i think..

regardless to thai or farang or any nationalities of every corners of the world,

they are all alike

it's just the matter of MALE.

luv luv luv to my bloody valentine!

GFB.

"hubby ka, if u have minor wife.. can i have that so?"

[DaveYo]

Who me????? Never!!!!!!!

Always looking for something fresh daily.

Daveyoti

[the gentleman]

Voted yes, but then candyflip asked some advice, so "its all up in the air" - hang on, no its not, Doc P threw Georgies name into the equation and now the desire is gone

[Guest IT Manager]

Two points, or perhaps 3;

• I would like an extra button, "if you have 2 partners are you faithful to them?"
  
• George I think would be a quite reasonable addition to a group
  
• Dr PP not sure about
  
• Candy is welcome
  
• Roses are appreciated by all members of the menage' a trois
  

As to Daveyo's roving eye, can't see that in the near future. Wife keeps a very hairy eye on him.

[ChiangMaiThai]

I don't think its altogether natural to be with one person your entire life. If it was, then the vast majority of married people would be perfectly content and the desire to 'cheat' would never arise.

[Nat]

I don't think its altogether natural to be with one person your entire life.

I lived with a partner once, who argued that monogamy was not natural and that it was instinctual for a man to plant as many seeds as possible . He would try and use Darwinism as the basis of his argument - my response was that his thought patterns were interesting.

[Bluecat]

I don't think its altogether natural to be with one person your entire life.

I lived with a partner once, who argued that monogamy was not natural and that it was instinctual for a man to plant as many seeds as possible . He would try and use Darwinism as the basis of his argument

This is true for men AND women.

The survival of the species is enhanced by the dispersion of genes, the more dispersion there is, the better will be the chances of the specie to evolve and survive.

Did we (the human race) succeed?

Is our future survival at risk?

No further comment,...

[markt]

Did the American stop drinking?

Which one?

[Bluecat]

Did the American stop drinking?

Which one?

Sure not the ones I know,...

[djinn]

Sorry,

Can't vote.Too big butterfly No partner

[Bluecat]

personally i would not mind if my husband would sometimes have sexual intercourse with a service girl

just becoz it is like trading. **(in which not as unrespectful sense)

so?"

Excellent education if I may say.

Do you have sisters?

[Axel]

Can somebody give a definition please?

What is faithful?

Only after that is clarified, I think we can give a clear vote.

[ChiangMaiThai]

I don't think its altogether natural to be with one person your entire life.

I lived with a partner once, who argued that monogamy was not natural and that it was instinctual for a man to plant as many seeds as possible . He would try and use Darwinism as the basis of his argument - my response was that his thought patterns were interesting.

Nat, please refer to Bluecat's remarks. Its undeniable that there is a biological instinct to procreate in order to further the human race. This instinct does not dissapear when one becomes a husband, a wife, a boyfriend or a girlfriend. However, we have been taught that it is wrong to be with more than one person. Inevitably then, there will be problems...

[cdnvic]

Nat, please refer to Bluecat's remarks. Its undeniable that there is a biological instinct to procreate in order to further the human race. This instinct does not dissapear when one becomes a husband, a wife, a boyfriend or a girlfriend. However, we have been taught that it is wrong to be with more than one person. Inevitably then, there will be problems...

If we judged our current behavior by how nature built us then it would be perfectly acceptable to take a dump on the street, in the park, restraunt floor, or wherever you were when the need hit you. Fortunately we learned to control that 'instinct', and built toilets. Learning to control one's instincts is what makes you human. Blindly following them is what makes animals animals.

Bluecat has an excuse, what with the fur and the tail and all....

cv

[Bluecat]

Nat, please refer to Bluecat's remarks. Its undeniable that there is a biological instinct to procreate in order to further the human race. This instinct does not dissapear when one becomes a husband, a wife, a boyfriend or a girlfriend. However, we have been taught that it is wrong to be with more than one person. Inevitably then, there will be problems...

If we judged our current behavior by how nature built us then it would be perfectly acceptable to take a dump on the street, in the park, restraunt floor, or wherever you were when the need hit you. Fortunately we learned to control that 'instinct', and built toilets. Learning to control one's instincts is what makes you human. Blindly following them is what makes animals animals.

Bluecat has an excuse, what with the fur and the tail and all....

cv

Do not worry, Nat understand.

I was actually making up an excuse for her,...

(Nat @ Sun 2004-02-15,11:16:56)

QUOTE (Boo @ Fri 2004-02-13, 14:07:57)

I had a crap shag with an Englsih, Australian & south African bloke. (Not at the same time though  )

What a coincidence...so have I!! 

The stats are rising

[ChiangMaiThai]

Nat, please refer to Bluecat's remarks. Its undeniable that there is a biological instinct to procreate in order to further the human race. This instinct does not dissapear when one becomes a husband, a wife, a boyfriend or a girlfriend. However, we have been taught that it is wrong to be with more than one person. Inevitably then, there will be problems...

If we judged our current behavior by how nature built us then it would be perfectly acceptable to take a dump on the street, in the park, restraunt floor, or wherever you were when the need hit you. Fortunately we learned to control that 'instinct', and built toilets. Learning to control one's instincts is what makes you human. Blindly following them is what makes animals animals.

Bluecat has an excuse, what with the fur and the tail and all....

cv

Fair enough. Let me put it another way then. Our natural instincts tell us to procreate. Agree? Ok then. So we do just that and there's no problem yet. But then this person becomes a girlfriend or a wife, a boyfriend or a husband. Now she is MY girlfriend. Or I am HER boyfriend. Something beautiful has been reduced to ownership. You tell her you will love her forever. You are lying to yourself. The most honest thing you can say is that you love her now. Tomorrow? A year from now? How do you know? You decide in this moment that you will love one person forever? You're a different person now than you were a year ago. And you will be a different person a year from now. But we crave stability and control. And so the impossible expectations begin. Now you can not become close with other's of the opposite sex without either experiencing feelings of guilt or risking hurting another.

Millions and millions of other people out there with endless experiences to offer, but you artificially isolate yourself from them because society tells you that it is wrong. You must control your emotions, your instincts. That is afterall, what makes you human.

And the relationship continues, all along both parties knowing that there is no way that they can be everything to their counterpart. They may be loving. They may be beautiful. They may be smart. But they can not be everything. They know that at some point the other will seek what is missing somewhere else. Instead of understanding this simple fact and welcoming it as a reality, our insecurity drives us to jealousy. You tell her you love her. She is obliged to reply with like words. You further cement your ownership.

And the discontentment grows. Some remain in this state til the day they die, telling themselves all the while that they must control themselves and feeling guilty if they ever find themselves close to losing control. And others choose to experience relationships with others. But society is generally unaccepting of this and in most cases, ultimately the orginal relationship must end. This, society accepts. You can only love one individual. This is the rule of society, not of nature.

The entire state of affairs amounts to nothing short of mass neurosis.

[TizMe]

I voted yes. I am faithful to both my girlfriends.

Sharing is caring..

[djinn]

TizMe;

Lollllll

[NedKelly]

If you put yourself in your partners shoes and try to imagine how it feels to discover that your loved one has been shagging someone else behind your back, is a good way to keep the fidelity.

Picture this....you arrive home one day, go to check the email but discover a whole cache of emails from your partners lover.......complete with all the saucy details of their tryst. You are so shocked u dont know what to do, so you decide to make sure it is really happenning. As the days role along and you put the feelers out for signs of something, but nothing. So you fall into the trap of curiosity. You tap into your partners email account. Their you find not one but a handful of other sex partners and their spicy emails to and fro.

What do you do ? Well, you arrange for all your friends to get together and storm into the apartment you have followed the partner to.......to find the partner in a naked embrace with another. Its the best way to rid yourself of a $%#@^& !!

[12call]

Or toss her out the window in Pattaya Condo !!!!!!

[cdnvic]

I'll agree that fidelity is an artificial boundry, sort of like the room with the toilet in it (see last post). Like in my previous post, I will state that these are boundries that define us as civilized humans. Not that being unfaithful to your partner makes you uncivilized, just less so in my personal opinion.

I think when you acknowlage that you are preventing yourself from doing whats natural, but don't care because you would rather have that barrier than not have the one you love, you then have at least an inkling what real love is, and how great it can be. If you don't have, or have never had this, then I could understand your thinking, because you have yet to experience what causes the rest of us animals to senslessly cut ourselves off from the rest of the flock.

Everyone has a neurosis or two. This one's mine by choice. I wish you good luck with yours. (your choice, not neurosis)

cv

[the gentleman]

A lot less people are getting married these days, if you want to be a free person, good luck to you, your not being unfaithfull to anyone and probably have less head aches (not hangover headaches). If you get married, why be unfaithfull?, It is probably because the person is not the right one for you. Marriage is a commitment/contract to be taken seriously and be commited to each other - if you cant adhere to that - why do it.

My Father (RIP), once said to me - If a man cheats on his wife, he should not be trusted in business as if he treats his wife/mother of his children with contempt, what will he do to you!

[pnustedt]

What is faithful?

Quite . . . my wife has told me that she would not mind if I had sex with another girl as long as I used a condom and did not do it in her bed. So, if I did, I believe that I would be acting in good faith as long as I met with her conditions.

[impy_la_blimpy]

If you put yourself in your partners shoes and try to imagine how it feels to discover that your loved one has been shagging someone else behind your back, is a good way to keep the fidelity. 

Like your style Ned

Man - surely life's too busy to be shaggin' around . . .and life's definitely too short not to be happy.

Surely if you feel the need to shag around you can't be happy.

Man - I couldn't be doin with all the hassle of juggling all those balls in the air ['scuse the pun!] - and if I ever felt the desire to be 'unfatihful' - then I'd knock it on the head with the guy I was with!

Imp

[issan2]

Quite . . . my wife has told me that she would not mind if I had sex with another girl as long as I used a condom and did not do it in her bed. So, if I did, I believe that I would be acting in good faith as long as I met with her conditions.

My wife said the same to me a couple of times. But I dont think she really means it. My view is that I have a son now and Im happy with my wife. I didnt get married lightly and I believe that chldren need a secure future. When I was younger I went to loads of clubs and had loads of girl friends. But now Ive settled down. I voted yes.

[impy_la_blimpy]

My view is that I have a son now and Im happy with my wife. I didnt get married lightly and I believe that chldren need a secure future. When I was younger I went to loads of clubs and had loads of girl friends. But now Ive settled down. I voted yes.

Respect! . . .and how refreshing

[ChiangMaiThai]

If you put yourself in your partners shoes and try to imagine how it feels to discover that your loved one has been shagging someone else behind your back, is a good way to keep the fidelity.

And that is the problem exactly. Once you are 'taken' you can't just say 'honey, I'm going to see my other honey. Be back later.' Its not accepted.

For any two people who are content and happy with eachother, that is great! I wish you all the best. But the fact is that over 50% of married couples in the West divorce and I dont think we're so naive to believe that the other 50% are in beautiful, happy and romantic marriages. i would venture to say that half of the remaining 50% would divorce if they felt they could. (Fear of hurting the other. Fear of being alone. The kids. Financial reasons.) SO it should be more than clear that this notion that one person will be with another exclusively simply does not work. Its a nice idea, but just look at the facts... So we should accept this and understand it as a reality rather than expecting that our partner should be 'with me and only me' forever.