Just Back From My Second Visit To Thailand

[jamesdoe1234]

jamesdoe 1234 quote.we are all fools,we are doomed,doomed please lord let me have another 25yrs with my money grabbing wf.

If you were 20 years apart already, you'd be implying in your statement above that you've been with your wife 25 years. That makes 45 years. For you to have 25 years apart your wife would needed to of been 20. That's 65 years - that's on my assumption it's only 20 years apart and not 30 and you married your wife when she was only 20! You being 45 and probably as old as her dad - based around mutual physical attraction and love - HONESTLY. Hope you make it to 90/100 - otherwise someone else can enjoy the later years with your wife - my statement was not just about money.

[jamesdoe1234]

Sorry mate I just read what I wrote again and please don't think I put you in that boat with the fools marrying 20/30 years younger.

What's wrong with marrying 20/30 years younger?

i didnt actually write that, it just came out that way after i edited a reply to a multiquote

Wooloomooloo

I wrote it - see my post above. If you want me to go into detail I will but rest assured it will get ugly and painful - and for what ? To waste my time on an anonymous public forum? No thanks mate.

[jamesdoe1234]

OP, I don't plan to ever get married again unless there is a whole lot for me to gain as well. I won't be the only financial provider and wouldn't in my home country. Never was.

I have put some gals to a test and every one of them failed it. I simply told them I didn't have any money. I told them I didn't have any way of getting any. I think I told the last one that my total income was 25,000 baht per month as a retirement income. I told her I would have no money to invest in the family (small, losing) farm, or a house, or anything. I told her she would need to work to help. Every one of them was gone like a shot.

It is true that there are many, many Thai women who hope to snag a farang to improve their lot in life. Many see no other way out. Not all, but too many, and you need to be careful.

To some Thai's having lighter skin is important. I do know one S. Isaan gal who wants a farang so she can introduce some height and lighter skin into the family. She's dark skinned and just under 5 feet tall. (150 cm) I'm reminded always from that what the beautiful Princess Diana brought to the Royal Family in height and beauty, and of the two big strong handsome sons she bore. Now there is the gorgeous Kate who will have a child with one of Diana's sons. The Royal Family is forever changed, and even in the US they are stars. They are loved and draw huge crowds. So did Diana.

Some Thai women dream of doing something similar, even though they may know little of which I speak.

But none of these Thai motives are what we think of as romantic love for the sake of love. They are all calculated.

Be careful and the best to you.

Good advice that Rik, really good advice. There are plenty of good women with families with land, money, political power, and more. If I brought something to the table financially, I'd want it to be a fair deal all round. I think women/men are equal and ironically there was a topic on getting someones wife to run downstairs and grab a beer - I will find it for you if you like?. I notice so many posters that have dived in here, not live on that thread!

This is a public board and for all I know my friend whom I am about to speak may be a poster so I am going to be very vague. He's met a lovely uni girl, her daddy has cars, trucks, land, a very very successful business, houses, and more. His job is good but he has zero cash. They accept him and he's part of the team already. Marriage is not going to be expensive for him but he stands to gain a great deal. Fair play to him I say. Why should he burden himself with heartache and a wife to take care of AND pay for her to live as well?

Thailand is what you want to make of it, not what others tell you it is, and that especially applies to the majority of posters on TV.

[jamesdoe1234]

we met online over a year ago and chatted and got to know each other for about 6 months before we even decided we wanted to meet !

Dear God have mercy!

While I like your no nonsense approach, zero time wasting policy, don't you think your being a bit of a prick? or because it's an anonymous forum you don't care because there are no repercussions to putting people down? If you want to help the guy give him logic, examples, and experience? No?

[MarkCyr]

Looks great!!

[StaffsShot]

Good luck Rick, you sound a level headed guy, unfortunately a lot of posters are so negative about Thai women, because they chose the wrong one

I wish u well with your lady, she's making her restaurant business work by the sounds

[meatboy]

jamesdoe 1234 quote.we are all fools,we are doomed,doomed please lord let me have another 25yrs with my money grabbing wf.

If you were 20 years apart already, you'd be implying in your statement above that you've been with your wife 25 years. That makes 45 years. For you to have 25 years apart your wife would needed to of been 20. That's 65 years - that's on my assumption it's only 20 years apart and not 30 and you married your wife when she was only 20! You being 45 and probably as old as her dad - based around mutual physical attraction and love - HONESTLY. Hope you make it to 90/100 - otherwise someone else can enjoy the later years with your wife - my statement was not just about money.

are you mowlaa-ou?

[SteeleJoe]

...unfortunately a lot of posters are so negative about Thai women, because they chose the wrong one...

There it is.

[F4UCorsair]

This old line comes to mind:

My wife and I were perfectly happy for 25 years.............then we met each other!!

I just started watching the movie My Thai Bride with David, the Welsh sucker, starring. Only the first few minutes were available, then blank, but the crap that he spoke...."You can be anything you want to be here...." What does that mean?? It was obvious he had little experience in any of the far eastern countries, and set about to 'save' a poor Isaan girl. As they say, the rest is history, but it's been history a million times before, and many aren't listening.

I raised my kids telling them they can't make all the mistakes themselves because there are just too many, and some are very painful. It's better they learn from others' mistakes.

[SteeleJoe]

This old line comes to mind:

I just started watching the movie My Thai Bride with David, the Welsh sucker, starring. Only the first few minutes were available, then, but the crap that he spoke...."You can be anything you want to be here...." What does that mean?? It was obvious he had little experience in any of the far eastern countries, and set about to 'save' a poor Isaan girl. As they say, the rest is history, but it's been history a million times before, and many aren't listening.

I raised my kids telling them they can't make all the mistakes themselves because there are just too many, and some are very painful. It's better they learn from others' mistakes.

He says a LOT of crap throughout. And what the Thai woman says -- by no means all self - serving or evasive -- really completes the picture. The guy is a CLASSIC example of what I'm always talking about: choices. But another thing I've said for years: guys who believe (sometimes unconsciously) they can buy someone's love and/or loyalty are at best fools - and at worst kind of twisted exploiters and racist creeps; sure enough at the end his wife refers to some of that - 'Farangs think they can buy love but they can't'.

So, people meet a woman and within a short time feel they have found someone they can invest in emotionally and financially (for one especially bitter poster on this thread it was only two weeks to believe a woman 40 years younger had fallen in love with him and he with her). They proceed to throw more money at the person than that person has ever had but, by their actions, demonstrate they have no genuine interest in that person in anything but a superficial way (and a limited chance to learn without the requisite language skills and so limited time) and then when the honeymoon/ holiday phase is over - often accompanied by a need to now regulate spending, something their new companion hadn't anticipated - suddenly things start changing...

What a shock. The relationship based on very little other than some fun and easily earned affection with person whom they barely know and who is from a culture that is starkly different*, turns out to be unsustainable...it's those horrible Thai women! Taking money that was given to them voluntarily and somehow that didn't magically create love and a genuine bond. Is it that easy ANYWHERE to find someone to share a life with?

* And OF COURSE some or many of the women these guys are meeting are deceitful, manipulative, and ruthless in their effort to get what they want or even need. The mercilessness of their deeds comes easier as the victim has behaved in a way that is, in their eyes, is in some regards contemptible and undeserving of respect. Obviously among these women who exploit and deceive - but I argue not all - are some people of very low character; which one might have found that out with enough time and effort (and ability) to REALLY get to know them.

Edited May 13, 2013 by SteeleJoe

[irishken]

Integration ?? you will be tolerated but never accepted .So with houses being built ,businesses being thought about ,brother in law wine bar etc etc,i sense your in a world of hurt within 2 yrs ,i could be wrong but good luck with all that buddy

why would he never be accepted? going by your own bad experience ?

Wise up, "paddy ken", farangs are never accepted, just tolerated for their atm. Only a fool would build houses and buy trucks for the wifes brother

ha ha paddy ken,i like that and sooooo original.i like you name munger,what does that stand for? i think by reading your post i can see your about 15 years old in the head and wack off to the lingerie photo's in littlewoods magazine.

seems i have been accepted very easily,and i wish i could have some of the OP's skills and pass more time when i am about in the village. you just keeps spending your time turning tricks in pattaya young lad and have nothing but a high beer tolerance and a empty bank balance at the end of it,enjoy

Edited May 13, 2013 by irishken

[irishken]

ohhh my god ..... second timer to thailand ....... will the never learn about the truth behind the land of smiles ....... ric/ remember the ..... 3 F'S ok and it will save you milllions in the future .........................just like some poor lamb to the slaughter ....... will they never learn ........

thailand ====== lieland ........

so people loose millions and some loose millions sitting in bars all day,whats the difference,the first one still has his liver at the end of his life

Edited May 13, 2013 by irishken

[transam]

ohhh my god ..... second timer to thailand ....... will the never learn about the truth behind the land of smiles ....... ric/ remember the ..... 3 F'S ok and it will save you milllions in the future .........................just like some poor lamb to the slaughter ....... will they never learn ........

thailand ====== lieland ........

so people loose millions and some loose millions sitting in bars all day,whats the difference,the first one still has his liver at the end of his life

But his brain in a shambles. ..........................

[David48]

Sorry mate I just read what I wrote again and please don't think I put you in that boat with the fools marrying 20/30 years younger.

What's wrong with marrying 20/30 years younger?

Wooloomooloo

I wrote it - see my post above. If you want me to go into detail I will but rest assured it will get ugly and painful - and for what ? To waste my time on an anonymous public forum? No thanks mate.

jamesdoe 1234 ... I've just cracked a beer and kicking back ... so please "If you want me to go into detail I will but rest assured it will get ugly and painful - and for what ?" ... should be an interesting read.

I salivate at your reply.

.

[kannot]

hey rik i forgot to ask do you have a w.p.

m.m.who rattled your cage.

no, i dont have a w.p., why would i need one, i wasnt paid for anything i did, i was just helping the family out so technically speaking wasnt employed and thus have no need of a work permit, the question did come up however and the gfs brother in law who is a policeman told us not to worry about it

I also do my own jobs around my house but have on occasions recieved some cautionary advice from a local family friend

who is also a policeman, a work permit is apparently required to do any work that would normally incur a payment, so you

not recieving any payment would not matter just that if a Thai did the work they would recieve payment and the fact you are

doing it for free would be seenas you doing somebody out of a job, i never have got ome to do my own jobs, but i suppose

if somebody wanted to cause problems they could.

They ought to say " do a job properly" as I've found no one capable yet, I do 99% of ANY work that needs doing..

[SinglePot]

OP, I don't plan to ever get married again unless there is a whole lot for me to gain as well. I won't be the only financial provider and wouldn't in my home country. Never was.

I have put some gals to a test and every one of them failed it. I simply told them I didn't have any money. I told them I didn't have any way of getting any. I think I told the last one that my total income was 25,000 baht per month as a retirement income. I told her I would have no money to invest in the family (small, losing) farm, or a house, or anything. I told her she would need to work to help. Every one of them was gone like a shot.

It is true that there are many, many Thai women who hope to snag a farang to improve their lot in life. Many see no other way out. Not all, but too many, and you need to be careful.

To some Thai's having lighter skin is important. I do know one S. Isaan gal who wants a farang so she can introduce some height and lighter skin into the family. She's dark skinned and just under 5 feet tall. (150 cm) I'm reminded always from that what the beautiful Princess Diana brought to the Royal Family in height and beauty, and of the two big strong handsome sons she bore. Now there is the gorgeous Kate who will have a child with one of Diana's sons. The Royal Family is forever changed, and even in the US they are stars. They are loved and draw huge crowds. So did Diana.

Some Thai women dream of doing something similar, even though they may know little of which I speak.

But none of these Thai motives are what we think of as romantic love for the sake of love. They are all calculated.

Be careful and the best to you.

"Some Thai women dream of doing something similar, even though they may know little of which I speak."

Yep, they haven't got a clue what you are talking about.

[ozziebloke]

It is so funny that so many talk about friends that have been burned? And then again there are so many that have been burned by their Ex's but most are not Thai but from their homeland. All I can see is that you have joined in a relationship and enjoying it so far and really that is just normal life no matter where on this earth you are. Congrats to you, your story sounds similar to mine and I have been with my missus 7 years now just married the last year. You sound like you already know all you need to know my advice is just enjoy everything if it dosn't work out that is life, if all works out thats a real bonus. Cheers

[cardholder]

Sorry mate I just read what I wrote again and please don't think I put you in that boat with the fools marrying 20/30 years younger.

What's wrong with marrying 20/30 years younger?

i didnt actually write that, it just came out that way after i edited a reply to a multiquote

Wooloomooloo

I wrote it - see my post above. If you want me to go into detail I will but rest assured it will get ugly and painful - and for what ? To waste my time on an anonymous public forum? No thanks mate.

I think that is exactly what you have been doing...........

[SinglePot]

OP. You are useful.

Cheers

[ALFREDO]

One of her other boyfriends, will be there next week.

Great cheap labourers Farangland visitors.

Nasty!

[ALFREDO]

Same old story , Farang who cannot get a decent woman in his own country comes to Thailand and suddenly finds LOVE with a young and pretty lady who makes him believe that he is the most handsome man she has ever seen, as long as he is willing to finance whatever project she or her family have in mind !!

Just wait and see what comes after that !!

EGO MAKES MEN DEAF & BLIND & In Thailand even Morons !!

we met online over a year ago and chatted and got to know each other for about 6 months before we even decided we wanted to meet !

A long, "deliberation phase"

[wooloomooloo]

Sorry mate I just read what I wrote again and please don't think I put you in that boat with the fools marrying 20/30 years younger.

What's wrong with marrying 20/30 years younger?

Wooloomooloo

I wrote it - see my post above. If you want me to go into detail I will but rest assured it will get ugly and painful - and for what ? To waste my time on an anonymous public forum? No thanks mate.

jamesdoe 1234 ... I've just cracked a beer and kicking back ... so please "If you want me to go into detail I will but rest assured it will get ugly and painful - and for what ?" ... should be an interesting read.

I salivate at your reply.

Agreed, David. I await jamesdoe's ugly and painful outpouring with bated breath.

It'll be cathartic for you, jamesdoe, and pure entertainment for the rest of us.

[irishken]

It is so funny that so many talk about friends that have been burned? And then again there are so many that have been burned by their Ex's but most are not Thai but from their homeland. All I can see is that you have joined in a relationship and enjoying it so far and really that is just normal life no matter where on this earth you are. Congrats to you, your story sounds similar to mine and I have been with my missus 7 years now just married the last year. You sound like you already know all you need to know my advice is just enjoy everything if it dosn't work out that is life, if all works out thats a real bonus. Cheers

its always easier to say it was a friend, more likely it was themselves and just can't face the reality of way it happened

[jamesdoe1234]

Wooloomooloo

I wrote it - see my post above. If you want me to go into detail I will but rest assured it will get ugly and painful - and for what ? To waste my time on an anonymous public forum? No thanks mate.

jamesdoe 1234 ... I've just cracked a beer and kicking back ... so please "If you want me to go into detail I will but rest assured it will get ugly and painful - and for what ?" ... should be an interesting read.

I salivate at your reply.

Agreed, David. I await jamesdoe's ugly and painful outpouring with bated breath.

It'll be cathartic for you, jamesdoe, and pure entertainment for the rest of us.

What watching one of my Dad's friends spend the end of his life worrying about what his wifes going to do when he's not here rather than enjoying what he's got now? Sad stories I could waste my time on.

[David48]

What watching one of my Dad's friends spend the end of his life worrying about what his wifes going to do when he's not here rather than enjoying what he's got now? Sad stories I could waste my time on.

"If you want me to go into detail I will but rest assured it will get ugly and painful - and for what ?" ...

So, what I was hoping for was your insightful story of relationships in Thailand with an age difference.

Before you cast a line my way, my gf doesn't fall into the age group you refer to.

So get cracking ... I'd love to read your musings ...

.

[smokie36]

Voulez Vous....my first trip to Thailand.....I can only dream......!

[MrWorldwide]

One of the great (?) things about joining a Thai-based board over ten years ago (different board name) is that I get to confront some of my more naive postings. I recall posting some nonsense about how I had survived that first trip and had not had any desire to return, instead exploring other parts of Asia in the years that followed. An older, wiser hand piped in with the observation that he had felt similarly 'invlulnerable' after the first trip, but was a 'goner' from his second trip onwards : whether it was a self-fulfilling prophecy or not, that became my experience, to the point where I have found myself in hotel rooms in HK or KL idly looking for flights to BKK - it's an affliction. In most cities, the taxi from the airport to the hotel is accompanied by nothing more than 'Cant wait to pass out in that hotel room' - only BKK and KL have me staring out the window with anticipation building all the way to the city centre. I get into that cab with a smile from one ear to the other, even at 1am, and all thought of sleep is erased from my mind : it's Disneyland, and they've just let me through the turnstiles.

[PalMan]

Yes I too find the knee-jerk cynicism here tiresome and offensive.

And IMO there's nothing wrong with an old fool spending time with and money on his pretty younger SO, as long as he keeps his wits about him, doesn't let himself get deluded, makes sure his long-term personal financial viability isn't threatened, ideally makes sure he continues to get good value for time/energy/devotion and money spent.

The fact that so many do let themselves get deluded is IMO their own fault, and most of the time the girls have earned every s'tang they've been able to scam.

And real love (as I see it) often still emerges over time even in that context, as long as the money doesn't run out.

People so few generations from hunger need to have a more practical approach to mate selection, silly disney ideas about "til death do us part" no matter what are as much a luxury of wealthy societies as fast ambulance services available to all.

[ozziebloke]

Yes I too find the knee-jerk cynicism here tiresome and offensive.

And IMO there's nothing wrong with an old fool spending time with and money on his pretty younger SO, as long as he keeps his wits about him, doesn't let himself get deluded, makes sure his long-term personal financial viability isn't threatened, ideally makes sure he continues to get good value for time/energy/devotion and money spent.

The fact that so many do let themselves get deluded is IMO their own fault, and most of the time the girls have earned every s'tang they've been able to scam.

And real love (as I see it) often still emerges over time even in that context, as long as the money doesn't run out.

People so few generations from hunger need to have a more practical approach to mate selection, silly disney ideas about "til death do us part" no matter what are as much a luxury of wealthy societies as fast ambulance services available to all.

"Yes I too find the knee-jerk cynicism here tiresome and offensive."

Yet you add your own cynicism and lecturing

[Hedghog]

What occurred on your first visit?

Was that all visiting Temples and kitchen furniture retailers.