cardholder Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well I have a pet fly and we are so happy together, shall I open a topic too ? No, I wouldn't bother - it wouldn't be interesting. Unlike this topic which you found so interesting that you were compelled to post 3 times in 15 minutes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Wife's best friend. Married to a 61 yr old Brit. Kid is just over 1 yr old. They are happy. I don't get it Why would not they be happy ? They chose each others and they are together. why would age gap make people unhappy? I think this topic/the OP is trying to get approval ie ; they are happy therefore it's right/better to have age gap / it should be the norm. Age gap as shown in developed countries is only popular when women are in no position to make decent living for themselves. Give women rights and opportunities to work and get decent wages and they don't consider old farts anymore. So no, age gap is never going to be the norm. It's only popular here because you have extra cash compared to locals. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 (edited) Well I have a pet fly and we are so happy together, shall I open a topic too ? His parents don't approve and so do most of our friends ... People can be so judgmental You do know that you are replying to yourself ... . Shhh, I think he's looking in the mirror. Who is HE ? Edited June 4, 2013 by Kitsune Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well I have a pet fly and we are so happy together, shall I open a topic too ? No, I wouldn't bother - it wouldn't be interesting. Unlike this topic which you found so interesting that you were compelled to post 3 times in 15 minutes Why not? happiness is a huge topic here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Why not? happiness is a huge topic here Happiness is always welcome on the Forum. Indeed ... I've missed you posting here. The Forum will be a more colourful place with you here ... . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardholder Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well I have a pet fly and we are so happy together, shall I open a topic too ? No, I wouldn't bother - it wouldn't be interesting. Unlike this topic which you found so interesting that you were compelled to post 3 times in 15 minutes Why not? happiness is a huge topic here I don't think the OP was necessarily expecting this to be 100% a 'happiness' thread. There are a number of people who have opposing views to (a farang) starting another family late in life. A friend who is considering such family planning was told ny his daughter in the UK that he should concentrate on his more important responsibilities of being a grandfather........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well I have a pet fly and we are so happy together, shall I open a topic too ? No, I wouldn't bother - it wouldn't be interesting. Unlike this topic which you found so interesting that you were compelled to post 3 times in 15 minutes Why not? happiness is a huge topic here I don't think the OP was necessarily expecting this to be 100% a 'happiness' thread. There are a number of people who have opposing views to (a farang) starting another family late in life. A friend who is considering such family planning was told ny his daughter in the UK that he should concentrate on his more important responsibilities of being a grandfather........ That's what I meant Behind this "they are happy" statement, the OP is searching for approval (In a forum full of aging expats with young Thai wives) A need for reassurance Well I think his daughter has a point, it's kinda selfish to make a new family if you don't take care of your own Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehelmsman Posted June 4, 2013 Author Share Posted June 4, 2013 Threads on here are simply started by someone writing what one is thinking at the moment. I had no agenda. My pops was in his mid 50's when i was born so I know some of the pitfalls ahead, but believe the good outweighs the bad. About to get off work - going back to sea tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardholder Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 (edited) Why not? happiness is a huge topic here I don't think the OP was necessarily expecting this to be 100% a 'happiness' thread. There are a number of people who have opposing views to (a farang) starting another family late in life. A friend who is considering such family planning was told ny his daughter in the UK that he should concentrate on his more important responsibilities of being a grandfather........ That's what I meant Behind this "they are happy" statement, the OP is searching for approval (In a forum full of aging expats with young Thai wives) A need for reassurance Well I think his daughter has a point, it's kinda selfish to make a new family if you don't take care of your own His daughter has no point at all. It is HIS life and he has chosen to spend it in Thailand. If he chooses to start a family here - up to him. If his daughter cannot deal with that then it is her problem. Edited June 4, 2013 by cardholder 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BookMan Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 ...' Well I think his daughter has a point, it's kinda selfish to make a new family if you don't take care of your own Where does the 'taking care of your own' start and finish though? If the guy referred to has another child, then that child is 100% equally his as much as the first daughter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Why not? happiness is a huge topic here Happiness is always welcome on the Forum. Indeed ... I've missed you posting here. The Forum will be a more colourful place with you here ... . Well... Thank you ! I have been crazy busy My dog is in Kidney failure and that's a 24/7 job to get creatinin and BUN rates down Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BookMan Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family Yes the daughter is his family, and so are any other sons or daughters he has at any stage in the future, or has had at any stage in the past. As for doing a bad job with his daughter, and we do not know at all that he has done a bad job, then surely that daughter wouldn't want him doing a bad job of the grand daughter, yes? My point is that it is all shades of grey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FDog Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 (edited) Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family What a load of tosh. His daughter, if an adult, must take care of herself. His job is complete with her. Her children are for her to care for, nothing to do with him if he doesn't want to. As his current child is not of age then he has MORE responsibility to that one. The law won't compel him to care for his grandchildren, not his problem. Edit: If the daughter wants to shame him into taking care of the grandkids then she is a complete <deleted>. Her kids are her responsibility and hers and the fathers responsibility only. Edited June 4, 2013 by FDog 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supaprik Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Children are a blessing no matter what age the parents are. Good on you Helmsman I wish you and your family every happiness and a very bright future..... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family What a load of tosh. His daughter, if an adult, must take care of herself. His job is complete with her. Her children are for her to care for, nothing to do with him if he doesn't want to. As his current child is not of age then he has MORE responsibility to that one. The law won't compel him to care for his grandchildren, not his problem. Edit: If the daughter wants to shame him into taking care of the grandkids then she is a complete <deleted>. Her kids are her responsibility and hers and the fathers responsibility only. Erm it's called "reciprocal duty of support between parents and children" If your children are in need regardless of age, a court can force you to pay for support and reciprocally Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post cardholder Posted June 4, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family What a load of tosh. His daughter, if an adult, must take care of herself. His job is complete with her. Her children are for her to care for, nothing to do with him if he doesn't want to. As his current child is not of age then he has MORE responsibility to that one. The law won't compel him to care for his grandchildren, not his problem. Edit: If the daughter wants to shame him into taking care of the grandkids then she is a complete <deleted>. Her kids are her responsibility and hers and the fathers responsibility only. Erm it's called "reciprocal duty of support between parents and children" If your children are in need regardless of age, a court can force you to pay for support and reciprocally You do talk <deleted> - not sure if it is deliberate or accidental ! Apart from being 100% wrong your comments are also made in ignorance of the fact that he has provided very nicely for his daughter (and grandchild). His daughter may jeopardise her inheritance if she becomes too stubborn. As you should be aware (under the Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act 1975) his only dependent is now his Thai wife - maybe later a child as well) 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FDog Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family What a load of tosh. His daughter, if an adult, must take care of herself. His job is complete with her. Her children are for her to care for, nothing to do with him if he doesn't want to. As his current child is not of age then he has MORE responsibility to that one. The law won't compel him to care for his grandchildren, not his problem. Edit: If the daughter wants to shame him into taking care of the grandkids then she is a complete <deleted>. Her kids are her responsibility and hers and the fathers responsibility only. Erm it's called "reciprocal duty of support between parents and children" If your children are in need regardless of age, a court can force you to pay for support and reciprocally You do talk <deleted> - not sure if it is deliberate or accidental ! Apart from being 100% wrong your comments are also made in ignorance of the fact that he has provided very nicely for his daughter (and grandchild). His daughter may jeopardise her inheritance if she becomes too stubborn. As you should be aware (under the Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act 1975) his only dependent is now his Thai wife - maybe later a child as well) In addition, the daughter is not talking about support for HER. She is talking about the guy supporting her kids. That is her responsibility only. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family What a load of tosh. His daughter, if an adult, must take care of herself. His job is complete with her. Her children are for her to care for, nothing to do with him if he doesn't want to. As his current child is not of age then he has MORE responsibility to that one. The law won't compel him to care for his grandchildren, not his problem. Edit: If the daughter wants to shame him into taking care of the grandkids then she is a complete <deleted>. Her kids are her responsibility and hers and the fathers responsibility only. Erm it's called "reciprocal duty of support between parents and children" If your children are in need regardless of age, a court can force you to pay for support and reciprocally You do talk <deleted> - not sure if it is deliberate or accidental ! Apart from being 100% wrong your comments are also made in ignorance of the fact that he has provided very nicely for his daughter (and grandchild). His daughter may jeopardise her inheritance if she becomes too stubborn. As you should be aware (under the Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act 1975) his only dependent is now his Thai wife - maybe later a child as well) Ignorance of his family's business certainly The law remains ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family What a load of tosh. His daughter, if an adult, must take care of herself. His job is complete with her. Her children are for her to care for, nothing to do with him if he doesn't want to. As his current child is not of age then he has MORE responsibility to that one. The law won't compel him to care for his grandchildren, not his problem. Edit: If the daughter wants to shame him into taking care of the grandkids then she is a complete <deleted>. Her kids are her responsibility and hers and the fathers responsibility only. Touched a nerve ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RakJungTorlae Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 ive herd that having kids over 50 can course mental health issues plus other genetic problems, my friends dad is 50 years older then him and i can say that boy is not right in the head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FDog Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 (edited) Touched a nerve? I don't know how. I've never been married nor do I have kids. But I do have a law degree. Edited June 4, 2013 by FDog Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardholder Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family What a load of tosh. His daughter, if an adult, must take care of herself. His job is complete with her. Her children are for her to care for, nothing to do with him if he doesn't want to. As his current child is not of age then he has MORE responsibility to that one. The law won't compel him to care for his grandchildren, not his problem. Edit: If the daughter wants to shame him into taking care of the grandkids then she is a complete <deleted>. Her kids are her responsibility and hers and the fathers responsibility only. Erm it's called "reciprocal duty of support between parents and children" If your children are in need regardless of age, a court can force you to pay for support and reciprocally You do talk <deleted> - not sure if it is deliberate or accidental ! Apart from being 100% wrong your comments are also made in ignorance of the fact that he has provided very nicely for his daughter (and grandchild). His daughter may jeopardise her inheritance if she becomes too stubborn. As you should be aware (under the Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act 1975) his only dependent is now his Thai wife - maybe later a child as well) Ignorance of his family's business certainly The law remains ... .... a mystery to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theblether Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 I agree with FDog Well the law and I beg to disagree His daughter IS his family and he has a responsibility to her and her children. If she would be in need regardless her age, by law he has to help her. So if he's already doing a bad job at taking care of her, very selfish indeed to start a new family What a load of tosh. His daughter, if an adult, must take care of herself. His job is complete with her. Her children are for her to care for, nothing to do with him if he doesn't want to. As his current child is not of age then he has MORE responsibility to that one. The law won't compel him to care for his grandchildren, not his problem. Edit: If the daughter wants to shame him into taking care of the grandkids then she is a complete <deleted>. Her kids are her responsibility and hers and the fathers responsibility only. Touched a nerve ? FDog is correct and your response is laughable, far too many " Kidults " seem to think that there parents owe them a living for the rest of their lives. Older parents, especially one's with previous families, had better take care of the legal situation in regards to their families. I know of one young girl in Chiang Mai who has been abandoned without assistance by her Farang family since the death of her father last year. The father made no provision for his daughter in his will. It doesn't look like the family in question are prepared to send a penny her way to help out with school fees and the like. I reckon the OP was a bit passive aggressive in challenging out the " haters ", but if anything comes from this topic then it should be that you older parents will ensure that your young new baby will not be left high and dry in the event of your untimely death. Guys in their 50's tend to be closer to the end than the beginning, how many of you even have a will in place? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
falkan Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 dont old farts +50 want to see their kids grow up and get married before they die? putting a life in to this world comes with responsibility and not leaving you kid with some young thai girl.. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neeranam Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 (edited) I've met many happy older dads with young kids. Unfortunately 10 years on only a few are still with the woman and/or kids, and some are dead. I'm a bit under 50 and my kids are at a private prathom school, one soon going to mattayom. When I decided to have kids I had no idea how large a part of my life has been taken over and how happy I am now, however I also never envisaged how much of a financial burden they can be for decent schools, holidays etc. Edited June 4, 2013 by Neeranam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theblether Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 dont old farts +50 want to see their kids grow up and get married before they die? putting a life in to this world comes with responsibility and not leaving you kid with some young thai girl.. That's what's effectively happened in the case I referred to, although the mother is not all that young. The mother is now scrabbling around the place on the Thai economy earning a pittance, and the child is suffering due to the abandonment. I heard the other week that's she's looking underfed. I cannot believe this was ever the intention of her father. Setting aside the emotional trauma of a child losing a parent, what have you older fathers actually done to secure your child's well being? Have you at least written a will? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theblether Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Can I add one more point, I fell out with a girlfriend in Scotland who I was very fond of as she did not press for her rightful share of the assets when she got divorced. She was convinced that the father of her two sons would always do the right thing by them. I pointed out that he was still a young man and unlikely to go through the rest of his life without remarrying, that went down like a ton of bricks. Lo and behold, he's now remarried, and adopted another two son's. To be fair to my ex, she did call me and say to me that everything I had predicted would happen has happened. So there begs a question for you older gents, what guarantee do you have that any assets you leave to your wife will still be there for your kids when they come of age? If you don't ring fence the assets then you are taking the same risk that my ex took and it has back fired on her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tchooptip Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Well I have a pet fly and we are so happy together, shall I open a topic too ? His parents don't approve and so do most of our friends ... People can be so judgmental You do know that you are replying to yourself ... . Not replying...talking to himself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tchooptip Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 dont old farts +50 want to see their kids grow up and get married before they die? putting a life in to this world comes with responsibility and not leaving you kid with some young thai girl.. +50 old farts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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