SinglePot Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 So it's OK for you to have your career but not the woman you intend to marry - her duty is just to cook and keep your house - although this is optional? Sorry, but sentiments like that are ridiculous and it's no wonder you're not having much success in finding a partner. Yes, this is what I am looking for. I don't force any woman for this, and if she voluntarily agrees to play this role - what slavery are you talking about? Or you really think any woman in Thailand MUST want to make a career? Somebody choose a marriage, where both marrieds are working and building there own career and somobody choose other types of marriage. For my opinion, it's a choice of two. Believe me I met a bunch of ladies here who would happily agree to this - I didn't choose any of them because they did't met other criteria. Fall in love and maybe the criteria will change? But you yourself said 'I am a type of person who can't get blind when falling in love so...' The opposite end of your spectrum OP is 'If it's not madness, it's not love.' My advice: let your hair down and see where it takes you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loptr Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 I enrolled the uni at the age of 16 (just a few month before my 17th birthday) and finished it at the age of 22. I am 29 y o now. Reasons why I moved to Pattaya, why I am builiding my career here - my diploma is connected to travel industry. If you or your pals did't get a Master Degree on that age does not mean nobody can. Don't consider anything breaking your stereotype is fake I can meet you in person in Pattaya and show you my original diploma with my passport together, if you agree to pay a 100 euro for this entertainment. lol So you enrolled in uni at 16, highly doubtful. 18 is normally the minimum age unless you have a genius pedigree and then you find a uni that has a junior enrollment program for gifted people. That is also not likely, and a tourism connected course is not normally what a uni would expect a super gifted junior to enroll into. When you finish your bachelors, you trying to tell us that you did your masters which is normally reserved for people wishing to teach that particular subject at college level. Then you say you achieved all this by the time you are 21? lol.... you must think we just stepped off the banana boat. Why not show your so called diploma for free? Why do you need to put a 100 Euro obstacle in place before agreeing to confirm your story? I am happy to show my qualifications for free to anyone who cares to see them. Then after all this genius status that you have under your belt, you are still non the wiser for how to look for a girl in a country you have supposidly lived for 7 years? Pull the other one, its got bells on it. Not everyone is a Podunk that just fell off the back of a turnip truck. I have a friend that graduated university at the age of 18. Had his Masters at 20 and his Doctorate at 22. Just because it is not the norm doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 So it's OK for you to have your career but not the woman you intend to marry - her duty is just to cook and keep your house - although this is optional? Sorry, but sentiments like that are ridiculous and it's no wonder you're not having much success in finding a partner. Yes, this is what I am looking for. I don't force any woman for this, and if she voluntarily agrees to play this role - what slavery are you talking about? Or you really think any woman in Thailand MUST want to make a career? Somebody choose a marriage, where both marrieds are working and building there own career and somobody choose other types of marriage. For my opinion, it's a choice of two. Believe me I met a bunch of ladies here who would happily agree to this - I didn't choose any of them because they did't met other criteria. While I may not agree with the comments above ... there is someone for everyone. Our personal preferences shouldn't dictate what other consenting couples concede to. However, if the OP doesn't see the opportunities that present themselves he may end up in a similar situation to this gentleman ... I know it's a tired cliché ... but the search should not be for the perfect woman ... but the woman perfect for you. Same but different ... now where have I heard that before ... . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boosta Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Well Boosta, the OP hasn't really said what he would be providing his wife. He hasn't said what he is bringing to the table that is so great, exciting, lovable, enjoyable, interesting, just nothing at all! It does sound like he wants a housekeeper who will also breed ...in one way his list is of requirements is so low, or lacking that it seems like a robot would do ...if only the robots didn't have so many annoying habits, like smoking, gambling, talking a way he dislikes, etc. I mean, I can understand the list of things he wrote, as being things many people wouldn't like, but it doesn't quite sound like he is talking about humans here. What does he LIKE? And what would make a woman happy in his dream life?? Maybe this part of the equation is missing in his planning, and so, there haven't been many interested parties? - I consider all you're talking about to be besides the point of his question. Look at it like a salesman who only needs to close one customer per quarter, but although it's something everyone may need at some point, it's a very big-ticket item, so he's going to make twenty calls on the phone and three in person every day five days a week in that quarter to make sure he finds that one customer. If someone gives me the criteria that they find important and what resources (time energy money attention language etc) they have to bring to bear on the project, I'm happy to help advise them on a plan of action for a successful campaign to increase the odds they'll find people to fill the top of the pipeline that match their target profile. If someone else wants to concern themselves with closing tactics, script writing, unique selling proposition etc that's all fine and good, but that's not what's being asked for here as far as I can see. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JJttttt1 Posted June 17, 2013 Author Share Posted June 17, 2013 Well Boosta, the OP hasn't really said what he would be providing his wife. He hasn't said what he is bringing to the table that is so great, exciting, lovable, enjoyable, interesting, just nothing at all! It does sound like he wants a housekeeper who will also breed ...in one way his list is of requirements is so low, or lacking that it seems like a robot would do ...if only the robots didn't have so many annoying habits, like smoking, gambling, talking a way he dislikes, etc. I mean, I can understand the list of things he wrote, as being things many people wouldn't like, but it doesn't quite sound like he is talking about humans here. What does he LIKE? And what would make a woman happy in his dream life?? Maybe this part of the equation is missing in his planning, and so, there haven't been many interested parties? I did't mention what I am going "to bring to the table" because I had no intention to attract any ladies on this forum. I was just asking for an advice... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SinglePot Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 sorry boosta. You are beginning to sound like the OP. Less brain, more heart....? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JJttttt1 Posted June 17, 2013 Author Share Posted June 17, 2013 Fall in love and maybe the criteria will change?But you yourself said 'I am a type of person who can't get blind when falling in love so...' The opposite end of your spectrum OP is 'If it's not madness, it's not love.' My advice: let your hair down and see where it takes you. In accordance with modern ideas, love is somewhat madness: it forces a person to get blind and notice only positive features of the object of love and not notice the manipulation. A wishful thinking. So in relationship "wins" the one who is less in love. Sad but true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ravip Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Can't remember if I have posted here yet , OP, ALL Thais are family orientated, in each others pocket, this is something none of us want, it is the Thai way BUT. After many years I am dealing with my mrs Thai family and now I only have one who is a problem. That problem may make or break my life here, BUT.............................we will see. The ''family'' will try and control stuff, you MUST be in control from day one. . "you MUST be in control from day one." When the "family" try to control "you" it is wrong - but "you" must be in control from day one. What are we talking about? Remote control toys? What are Thai females supposed to be? Confusing...confusing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SinglePot Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Falling in love does not necessarily mean you will be on the receiving end of manipulation. It can do, but it's not always the case. If that has been your experience in the past, it doesn't necessarily mean it will be in the future. Good luck. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ravip Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Just thinking... How to find a family oriented Thai wife? Suggestions? What if we re-phrase the question to read as "How to find a family oriented wife? Suggestions?" Would the answers differ? If yes, why bother to find "Thai"? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arthurwait Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Maternity clinic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Banzai99 Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 You have been here 7 years and you need to ask on here where to find a decent girl? I agree with Klubex99, why on earth would you ask a bunch of strangers on an anonymous forum on where to meet someone. You claim to be in your late 20’s and you're asking advice from people, many of whom where in their 20’s decades ago, for advice ? Just ask your Grandfather, at least you know him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boosta Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 sorry boosta. You are beginning to sound like the OP. Less brain, more heart....?- In accordance with modern ideas, love is somewhat madness: it forces a person to get blind and notice only positive features of the object of love and not notice the manipulation. A wishful thinking. So in relationship "wins" the one who is less in love. Sad but true. - Perhaps some may think it unfortunate but it's true I'm with JJ on this one. The pheromone-based sexual attraction "romantic" stuff, being "in love, nice as it is when it comes along, is not IMO a valid basis for a successful long-term relationship. True "love" is something that emerges from getting to know each other inside out, helping the other to grow into becoming the full person they have the potential to be, lots of time spent together, working together. The starting point for the relationship doesn't matter. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ravip Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 sorry boosta. You are beginning to sound like the OP. Less brain, more heart....?- In accordance with modern ideas, love is somewhat madness: it forces a person to get blind and notice only positive features of the object of love and not notice the manipulation. A wishful thinking. So in relationship "wins" the one who is less in love. Sad but true. -Perhaps some may think it unfortunate but it's true I'm with JJ on this one. The pheromone-based sexual attraction "romantic" stuff, being "in love, nice as it is when it comes along, is not IMO a valid basis for a successful long-term relationship. True "love" is something that emerges from getting to know each other inside out, helping the other to grow into becoming the full person they have the potential to be, lots of time spent together, working together. The starting point for the relationship doesn't matter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doontp Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 OP you have received some good advice (going local - make yourself known in the best light, being seen as a proper gentleman in the neighborhood, etc.. And some biased advice ... Despite the nay sayers... if you do it the right way you can find quality women on dating sites. If you are seeking an educated woman from a good family, who also seeks to have a family - it can be done using the Internet. People who think that only money grubbers, con artist and bar girls are on dating sites either didn't do it right or are just passing on hearsay. Using badoo.com and others, I have found women who are of high caliber, educated, good jobs, wholesome family members and much more... Examples....I have met women with the following credentials... Masters Degree educated lady from Udon Thani, school officer - curriculum development and Scout director; Nurse in Nong Khai... works for a government clinic / hospital - community outreach, owns her own home, son in University in Udon Thani, family farm in Udon... School Teacher in Central Thailand, has a secondary business that she works diligently, has two daughters who are in University in Bkk, ... All are proper ladies - plus they speak English well I could go on for pages listing fine Thai women in my age group. All one has to do is filter out the wheat from the chaff. And if you can't do that on a dating site - then you should not be meeting women randomly in your greater neighborhood. If you create an on line account on a dating site - state your objectives, read the profiles of the women carefully, do not respond to the frivolous or messages of a sexual nature... After meeting a few - make contact with Skype ... Using Skype I have met the womens' friends, children, sisters, brothers, coworkers, even their bosses. After this you can make a wise decision for face to face follow up. Remember - many young women in your age group are working full time - going to University part time, taking care of her family, etc. They may not have time for a traditional social scene ... I agree fully............I met 5 women in-person within a month from badoo.com. It was easy. I simply chose one I liked the most and asked the others to quit calling me. Badoo.com is almost like a menu. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MacWalen Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Residing and working in Thailand for 7 years and you don't know the ropes. That's what I"m thinkin too. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jbrain Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 OP you have received some good advice (going local - make yourself known in the best light, being seen as a proper gentleman in the neighborhood, etc.. And some biased advice ... Despite the nay sayers... if you do it the right way you can find quality women on dating sites. If you are seeking an educated woman from a good family, who also seeks to have a family - it can be done using the Internet. People who think that only money grubbers, con artist and bar girls are on dating sites either didn't do it right or are just passing on hearsay. Using badoo.com and others, I have found women who are of high caliber, educated, good jobs, wholesome family members and much more... Examples....I have met women with the following credentials... Masters Degree educated lady from Udon Thani, school officer - curriculum development and Scout director; Nurse in Nong Khai... works for a government clinic / hospital - community outreach, owns her own home, son in University in Udon Thani, family farm in Udon... School Teacher in Central Thailand, has a secondary business that she works diligently, has two daughters who are in University in Bkk, ... All are proper ladies - plus they speak English well I could go on for pages listing fine Thai women in my age group. All one has to do is filter out the wheat from the chaff. And if you can't do that on a dating site - then you should not be meeting women randomly in your greater neighborhood. If you create an on line account on a dating site - state your objectives, read the profiles of the women carefully, do not respond to the frivolous or messages of a sexual nature... After meeting a few - make contact with Skype ... Using Skype I have met the womens' friends, children, sisters, brothers, coworkers, even their bosses. After this you can make a wise decision for face to face follow up. Remember - many young women in your age group are working full time - going to University part time, taking care of her family, etc. They may not have time for a traditional social scene ... I agree fully............I met 5 women in-person within a month from badoo.com. It was easy. I simply chose one I liked the most and asked the others to quit calling me. Badoo.com is almost like a menu. So I take it that you're married 5 times now ? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 OP you have received some good advice snip> I agree fully............<snip> So I take it that you're married 5 times now ? Hey jbrain ... the member doontp is alright ... No need for bagging there ... more deserving candidates then him. Just saying like ... . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaideeguy Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Simply get on a bus/train to Issan and hang out a few days in each of the many towns and cities and you will find what you are looking for......or more than likely, they will find you. After mongoring in the sleaze of the bar towns I came to the decision that I wanted the same as you and went to Issan and found a great woman that I'm still with after 11 yrs. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SinglePot Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 sorry boosta. You are beginning to sound like the OP. Less brain, more heart....?- In accordance with modern ideas, love is somewhat madness: it forces a person to get blind and notice only positive features of the object of love and not notice the manipulation. A wishful thinking. So in relationship "wins" the one who is less in love. Sad but true.-Perhaps some may think it unfortunate but it's true I'm with JJ on this one. The pheromone-based sexual attraction "romantic" stuff, being "in love, nice as it is when it comes along, is not IMO a valid basis for a successful long-term relationship.True "love" is something that emerges from getting to know each other inside out, helping the other to grow into becoming the full person they have the potential to be, lots of time spent together, working together.The starting point for the relationship doesn't matter. Fair enough boosta. The pheromone bit is there for a reason though. Otherwise it's just intellectual. Chemistry kicks in from day 1. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boosta Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 So c'mon JJ I'm chafing at the bit here to help you in your quest - I'm still waiting for you to "choose your own adventure" back on the first page. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanLaew Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Well Boosta, the OP hasn't really said what he would be providing his wife. He hasn't said what he is bringing to the table that is so great, exciting, lovable, enjoyable, interesting, just nothing at all! It does sound like he wants a housekeeper who will also breed ...in one way his list is of requirements is so low, or lacking that it seems like a robot would do ...if only the robots didn't have so many annoying habits, like smoking, gambling, talking a way he dislikes, etc. I mean, I can understand the list of things he wrote, as being things many people wouldn't like, but it doesn't quite sound like he is talking about humans here. What does he LIKE? And what would make a woman happy in his dream life?? Maybe this part of the equation is missing in his planning, and so, there haven't been many interested parties? I did't mention what I am going "to bring to the table" because I had no intention to attract any ladies on this forum. I was just asking for an advice... It's hard enough to give advice based on what you want. It's harder to do so when we don't know what you are giving. I doubt the lovely TV ladies use the forum for seeking a life partner either so get over yourself! (plus it would probably give your thread a good chance of hitting the magic 12-page mark!) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boosta Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 (edited) Fair enough boosta. The pheromone bit is there for a reason though. Otherwise it's just intellectual. Chemistry kicks in from day 1. - Well maybe I'm just an easy mark that way, I find my chemistry mixes just fine with any number of girls that fit a certain profile, the romantic/physical attraction side really has never been a problem. The hard part for me is finding girls willing to fit in with my more practical requirements of finances, lifestyle and allow me to remain in control of my life. I've found it much more productive to start with the latter criteria and then select within that pool rather than just randomly wait for lightning to strike out in the general population, where too many girls are already set into a lifestyle that will bring their preferences into conflict with my needs. That lightning does strike me all the time as I'm out and about, I just don't pay it much attention anymore, when the time comes for me to go out and find a partner I do it very consciously with a target profile and a structured plan for increasing the odds of finding what I'm looking for. But that's just me, in this case seems to be in some alignment with the OP's style as well. Edited June 18, 2013 by boosta 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveReilly Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Why bother raising a kid in this corrupt country? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pigeonjake Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Why bother raising a kid in this corrupt country? maybe, just maybe, some of us love children and the joy we get out of them!! jake 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Why bother raising a kid in this corrupt country? maybe, just maybe, some of us love children and the joy we get out of them!! jake Thanks Jake ... Just one of a thousand reasons! . 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berkshire Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Why bother raising a kid in this corrupt country? With that sort of attitude, it's great that YOU don't have any kids. Less ignorant bigots in the gene pool is certainly a good thing. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SJN Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 I think it's best to look through neighbors and friends. Reaching for people out there on internet dating site or anything related to it is only mmm..hard to say lucky all time. Education means something but not everything when it comes to relationship. But personality and attitude do mean something:) Good luck. And you are still young...late twenties..still young:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SinglePot Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Why bother raising a kid in this corrupt country? Because they are innocent, without cynicism and they like pizza. Just like you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JJttttt1 Posted June 18, 2013 Author Share Posted June 18, 2013 -Well maybe I'm just an easy mark that way, I find my chemistry mixes just fine with any number of girls that fit a certain profile, the romantic/physical attraction side really has never been a problem. The hard part for me is finding girls willing to fit in with my more practical requirements of finances, lifestyle and allow me to remain in control of my life. I've found it much more productive to start with the latter criteria and then select within that pool rather than just randomly wait for lightning to strike out in the general population, where too many girls are already set into a lifestyle that will bring their preferences into conflict with my needs. That lightning does strike me all the time as I'm out and about, I just don't pay it much attention anymore, when the time comes for me to go out and find a partner I do it very consciously with a target profile and a structured plan for increasing the odds of finding what I'm looking for. But that's just me, in this case seems to be in some alignment with the OP's style as well. This is what I am talking about! marriage of convenience can be successful, if you choose a right person... So c'mon JJ I'm chafing at the bit here to help you in your quest - I'm still waiting for you to "choose your own adventure" back on the first page. sorry, I have quite a different background than yours, so had now idea what does "choose your own adventure" mean. So I have read about this in wiki, but still don't get the point.. So could you please explain what do you actually mean? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.png.3b3332cc2256ad0edbc2fe9404feeef0.png)
Recommended Posts