Raising kids in Thailand or Uk

[KunMatt]

Neeranam

 

If i was to live in Thailand  i'd be worried (for my child) about the drivers who are some of the worst in the world and have been proven not to care less about killing people. Hardly neurotic it is a fact that crossing roads in Thailand is like putting ones life in the hands of others.

 

Its aspects of this mindset that is accepted by Thais that is one reason for her spend minimal time there and to be brought up thinking like the English.

 

Though to be brought up nowhere near the new English underclass who are an embarrassment to themselves is obviously a prerequisite.

^^^ This

[Bof]

Do your kids a favor and never let them study in a Thai school.

[KunMatt]

Neeranam

If i was to live in Thailand i'd be worried (for my child) about the drivers who are some of the worst in the world and have been proven not to care less about killing people. Hardly neurotic it is a fact that crossing roads in Thailand is like putting ones life in the hands of others.

Its aspects of this mindset that is accepted by Thais that is one reason for her spend minimal time there and to be brought up thinking like the English.

Though to be brought up nowhere near the new English underclass who are an embarrassment to themselves is obviously a prerequisite.

It's not just the drivers that are a danger here, pedestrians and scooter drivers don't seem to care in the slightest for their own safety. I don't know how many times just this week I've been driving full speed down a highway and a pedestrian (or group of) have decided that they need to cross in the middle of a main road and even though there are no cars behind me they decide that it is worth being hit by a speeding pickup and run out in front of me instead of just waiting 5 seconds for a clear road to walk across. I will never understand that mentality and if I didn't expect it and take precautionary measures to avoid them I would have killed somebody by now.

The same goes for scooter drivers who seem to think they are in an armoured tank. I know that 100% of the time that when I see a scooter coming down a side road at 50km/h to join a main road that they are not going to give way at the junction or even slow down, they are going to pull straight out, come out of the scooter lane and encroach into the inside lane before turning and then checking over their shoulder to see if any cars are coming. 100% OF THE TIME. Again, I make it my responsibility to not kill these people which is ridiculous.

I don't think that this is all about bad drivers. This is about a mindset here of one-upsmanship and people are willing to cause a horrific accident and potential kill themselves, their own family and mine, just for the win of getting in front of me and saving themselves a few seconds in traffic. If anyone drives here you will know exactly what I mean. Selfishness doesn't fully cover it as it is just another extension of this face system where somebody doesn't want to give way to another because it means they've lost. Every time I signal to change lanes the car who has been behind me for miles in the lane I want to go into will all of a sudden speed up so I cannot change lanes and get infront of him (even though I am already infront of him in another lane), what is that if not just pure bloodymindness? That happens every time I try to change lanes.

I see the difference between the UK and Thai drivers as this: In the UK if you flash your lights at someone it means "I am giving you way and letting you go first", in Thailand it means "I am coming and not going to slow down or avoid you so get out of my way". When I do give way to someone and do them a favour in traffic it just confuses people and has nearly caused me accidents because drivers here are not used to selfless acts on the road. If you don't drive selfishly here then you are a danger to others. How ridiculous is that?

That's not to say there aren't bad drivers here, I don't think I've ever seen a woman driver who is not talking on the phone with her right hand holding the phone to her left ear. I've almost been rear ended multiple times by some idiot who has no idea how to predict a few seconds in front of him.

All of this is ONLY the driving side of things in this country, there are many other dangerous aspects to this country. I don't want my kids to have any of this mindset as a driver or as a pedestrian.

[benalibina]

@ Kunmatt.

We all get your point now that education for your kids is not gonna be in LOS.

For your and the readerssake, of this topic, please stop ranting about other aspects of thai society. I fear that, if this topic will not be closed before, next week we read an opinion from you about loud music at 7/11. ( In which you would most likely be correct as well )

Come on, come on, enjoy the day !

[AnotherOneAmerican]

I like Thailand and would like to stay here but not at the detriment of my kid's upbringing, which is what I think will happen to them if they grow up here.

I really thought I'd overstated why in my previous essays I wrote but here's the bulletpoints;

I think it is very dangerous for kids here;

Thai education is nothing compared to the UK;

I think kids here lack a lot of good characteristics that British kids learn early on;

I hate Thai youth culture;

I am at the mercy of immigration and whatever schools/companies I am signed up with for the next 15 years.

What pros are there for raising my kids in a 3rd world country which hates foreigners?

It's as if everyone here has forgotten their own school days.

I remember mine, bullying, gang fights, turf wars and racial attacks and insults (I'm not white).

Fighting nearly every week. As a kid I was seriously unhappy in the west.

From what I hear now it hasn't got any better (USA or UK).

[GuestHouse]

I'm guessing most people going back to their home country would be broke and living in a poor area.

I'm guessing you need to widen your social circle.

[Neeranam]

Neeranam

 

If i was to live in Thailand  i'd be worried (for my child) about the drivers who are some of the worst in the world and have been proven not to care less about killing people. Hardly neurotic it is a fact that crossing roads in Thailand is like putting ones life in the hands of others.

 

Its aspects of this mindset that is accepted by Thais that is one reason for her spend minimal time there and to be brought up thinking like the English.

 

Though to be brought up nowhere near the new English underclass who are an embarrassment to themselves is obviously a prerequisite.

 

It's not just the drivers that are a danger here, pedestrians and scooter drivers don't seem to care in the slightest for their own safety. I don't know how many times just this week I've been driving full speed down a highway and a pedestrian (or group of) have decided that they need to cross in the middle of a main road and even though there are no cars behind me they decide that it is worth being hit by a speeding pickup and run out in front of me instead of just waiting 5 seconds for a clear road to walk across.  I will never understand that mentality and if I didn't expect it and take precautionary measures to avoid them I would have killed somebody by now.

 

The same goes for scooter drivers who seem to think they are in an armoured tank.  I know that 100% of the time that when I see a scooter coming down a side road at 50km/h to join a main road that they are not going to give way at the junction or even slow down, they are going to pull straight out, come out of the scooter lane and encroach into the inside lane before turning and then checking over their shoulder to see if any cars are coming. 100% OF THE TIME. Again, I make it my responsibility to not kill these people which is ridiculous.

 

I don't think that this is all about bad drivers. This is about a mindset here of one-upsmanship and people are willing to cause a horrific accident and potential kill themselves, their own family and mine, just for the win of getting in front of me and saving themselves a few seconds in traffic.  If anyone drives here you will know exactly what I mean. Selfishness doesn't fully cover it as it is just another extension of this face system where somebody doesn't want to give way to another because it means they've lost. Every time I signal to change lanes the car who has been behind me for miles in the lane I want to go into will all of a sudden speed up so I cannot change lanes and get infront of him (even though I am already infront of him in another lane), what is that if not just pure bloodymindness? That happens every time I try to change lanes.

 

I see the difference between the UK and Thai drivers as this: In the UK if you flash your lights at someone it means "I am giving you way and letting you go first", in Thailand it means "I am coming and not going to slow down or avoid you so get out of my way".  When I do give way to someone and do them a favour in traffic it just confuses people and has nearly caused me accidents because drivers here are not used to selfless acts on the road. If you don't drive selfishly here then you are a danger to others. How ridiculous is that?

 

That's not to say there aren't bad drivers here,  I don't think I've ever seen a woman driver who is not talking on the phone with her right hand holding the phone to her left ear.  I've almost been rear ended multiple times by some idiot who has no idea how to predict a few seconds in front of him.

 

All of this is ONLY the driving side of things in this country, there are many other dangerous aspects to this country.  I don't want my kids to have any of this mindset as a driver or as a pedestrian.

Maybe 'your'real fear is seeing your half thai kids being more Thai than your nationality.

Think a minute about the psychological effect of telling your kids that half of their being is no good. I'm no psychologist but seen the results - low self esteem, depression, drug addiction etc.

You can do this in many ways - for example taking them to playgroups that speak English, shielding them from Thai TV, and general racist comments based on your own ignorance of the society. Remember, whether you like it or not, your kids are 50 % Thai.

[ChrisB87]

Just to let you know the background Kids 5 and 8. I am divorced so no pressure. Solely my idea, although their mother is Thai so would probably live near her as better for the children to have contact with both parents.

Oldest boy not too happy living in Uk after living in Thailand previously.

I could perhaps home teach for 6 months but if the children are going to live in and work in Thailand then they would need to go to a Thai school and learn to write Thai as well as speak it.

I believe as well as education social wellbeing and happiness has to be considered also.

I think social well being and happiness are more important than education. And being educated in the UK doesn't guarantee anything in life; there are a lot of dummies there too.

[KunMatt]

Neeranam

 

If i was to live in Thailand  i'd be worried (for my child) about the drivers who are some of the worst in the world and have been proven not to care less about killing people. Hardly neurotic it is a fact that crossing roads in Thailand is like putting ones life in the hands of others.

 

Its aspects of this mindset that is accepted by Thais that is one reason for her spend minimal time there and to be brought up thinking like the English.

 

Though to be brought up nowhere near the new English underclass who are an embarrassment to themselves is obviously a prerequisite.

 

It's not just the drivers that are a danger here, pedestrians and scooter drivers don't seem to care in the slightest for their own safety. I don't know how many times just this week I've been driving full speed down a highway and a pedestrian (or group of) have decided that they need to cross in the middle of a main road and even though there are no cars behind me they decide that it is worth being hit by a speeding pickup and run out in front of me instead of just waiting 5 seconds for a clear road to walk across.  I will never understand that mentality and if I didn't expect it and take precautionary measures to avoid them I would have killed somebody by now.

 

The same goes for scooter drivers who seem to think they are in an armoured tank.  I know that 100% of the time that when I see a scooter coming down a side road at 50km/h to join a main road that they are not going to give way at the junction or even slow down, they are going to pull straight out, come out of the scooter lane and encroach into the inside lane before turning and then checking over their shoulder to see if any cars are coming. 100% OF THE TIME. Again, I make it my responsibility to not kill these people which is ridiculous.

 

I don't think that this is all about bad drivers. This is about a mindset here of one-upsmanship and people are willing to cause a horrific accident and potential kill themselves, their own family and mine, just for the win of getting in front of me and saving themselves a few seconds in traffic.  If anyone drives here you will know exactly what I mean. Selfishness doesn't fully cover it as it is just another extension of this face system where somebody doesn't want to give way to another because it means they've lost. Every time I signal to change lanes the car who has been behind me for miles in the lane I want to go into will all of a sudden speed up so I cannot change lanes and get infront of him (even though I am already infront of him in another lane), what is that if not just pure bloodymindness? That happens every time I try to change lanes.

 

I see the difference between the UK and Thai drivers as this: In the UK if you flash your lights at someone it means "I am giving you way and letting you go first", in Thailand it means "I am coming and not going to slow down or avoid you so get out of my way".  When I do give way to someone and do them a favour in traffic it just confuses people and has nearly caused me accidents because drivers here are not used to selfless acts on the road. If you don't drive selfishly here then you are a danger to others. How ridiculous is that?

 

That's not to say there aren't bad drivers here,  I don't think I've ever seen a woman driver who is not talking on the phone with her right hand holding the phone to her left ear.  I've almost been rear ended multiple times by some idiot who has no idea how to predict a few seconds in front of him.

 

All of this is ONLY the driving side of things in this country, there are many other dangerous aspects to this country.  I don't want my kids to have any of this mindset as a driver or as a pedestrian.

Maybe 'your'real fear is seeing your half thai kids being more Thai than your nationality.

Think a minute about the psychological effect of telling your kids that half of their being is no good. I'm no psychologist but seen the results - low self esteem, depression, drug addiction etc.

You can do this in many ways - for example taking them to playgroups that speak English, shielding them from Thai TV, and general racist comments based on your own ignorance of the society. Remember, whether you like it or not, your kids are 50 % Thai.

No. You keep trying to over analyse this and apply some deep psychological misgiving on my behalf but I can assure you, I literally am afraid that my kids will be injured or killed here before they reach school leaving age because I see the dangers everywhere. Do you ever read the news here?? That's just what is reported. My partner's cousin's 3 family members who were killed by a drunk hit and run wasn't in the news, the police didn't even make a report about it until her family complained. The 13 year old shot in the head in this small village was also not in any news. The deaths and accidents here are much higher than reported and what's reported is already horrific enough.

If I had some problems with having half Thai kids because I hate Thai people like you are insinuating then I wouldn't have had 2 kids with a Thai girl and we wouldn't spend all of our days with all of her Thai family.

So no, its much more simple than you are trying to make it. It is exactly what I have explained here.

[Neeranam]

Many years ago my friends' kids went to the best international school in Bangkok.

Cost him over 1 million baht a year for 2 of them.

One day, whilst taking to the 17 year old a Thai woman walked in the front gate. I asked who it was told her grandmother but she never talked to her. She lived in a house next door.

why not speak to your gran?

She is thai.

But you are half thai.

No I am American.

But you live in Thailand and your mum's thai.

But my dad's American and I've been brought up that way.

Then I thought these kids were going to have problems.

Now in their mid - late 20s, both attend 12 step groups, for different conditions.

Their dad is the nicest guy you could meet and sacrificed everything for his kids. Foreign universities etc.

One thing I think he missed was to educate them in their thai roots and to be proud of being Thai and not ashamed.

Edited July 27, 2013 by Neeranam

[KunMatt]

Many years ago my friends' kids went to the best international school in Bangkok.

Cost him over 1 million baht a year for 2 of them.

One day, whilst taking to the 17 year old a Thai woman walked in the front gate. I asked who it was told her grandmother but she never talked to her. She lived in a house next door.

why not speak to your gran?

She is thai.

But you are half thai.

No I am American.

But you live in Thailand and your mum's thai.

But my dad's American and I've been brought up that way.

Then I thought these kids were going to have problems.

Now in their mid - late 20s, both attend 12 step groups, for different conditions.

Their dad is the nicest guy you could meet and sacrificed everything for his kids. Foreign universities etc.

One thing I think he missed was to educate them in their thai roots.

OK. Is that story supposed to apply to my situation somehow?

I said from the beginning that we are extremely close to my partner's family, there are 7 of them and 4 kids sitting in our house having lunch right now, and I also said from the beginning that the biggest reason for staying in Thailand or not wanting to move to the UK is that I don't want to break up our family.

So you're trying to make me out to be something I'm not and I'm telling you are wrong with this assumption.

[Neeranam]

Neeranam

If i was to live in Thailand i'd be worried (for my child) about the drivers who are some of the worst in the world and have been proven not to care less about killing people. Hardly neurotic it is a fact that crossing roads in Thailand is like putting ones life in the hands of others.

Its aspects of this mindset that is accepted by Thais that is one reason for her spend minimal time there and to be brought up thinking like the English.

Though to be brought up nowhere near the new English underclass who are an embarrassment to themselves is obviously a prerequisite.

It's not just the drivers that are a danger here, pedestrians and scooter drivers don't seem to care in the slightest for their own safety. I don't know how many times just this week I've been driving full speed down a highway and a pedestrian (or group of) have decided that they need to cross in the middle of a main road and even though there are no cars behind me they decide that it is worth being hit by a speeding pickup and run out in front of me instead of just waiting 5 seconds for a clear road to walk across. I will never understand that mentality and if I didn't expect it and take precautionary measures to avoid them I would have killed somebody by now.

The same goes for scooter drivers who seem to think they are in an armoured tank. I know that 100% of the time that when I see a scooter coming down a side road at 50km/h to join a main road that they are not going to give way at the junction or even slow down, they are going to pull straight out, come out of the scooter lane and encroach into the inside lane before turning and then checking over their shoulder to see if any cars are coming. 100% OF THE TIME. Again, I make it my responsibility to not kill these people which is ridiculous.

I don't think that this is all about bad drivers. This is about a mindset here of one-upsmanship and people are willing to cause a horrific accident and potential kill themselves, their own family and mine, just for the win of getting in front of me and saving themselves a few seconds in traffic. If anyone drives here you will know exactly what I mean. Selfishness doesn't fully cover it as it is just another extension of this face system where somebody doesn't want to give way to another because it means they've lost. Every time I signal to change lanes the car who has been behind me for miles in the lane I want to go into will all of a sudden speed up so I cannot change lanes and get infront of him (even though I am already infront of him in another lane), what is that if not just pure bloodymindness? That happens every time I try to change lanes.

I see the difference between the UK and Thai drivers as this: In the UK if you flash your lights at someone it means "I am giving you way and letting you go first", in Thailand it means "I am coming and not going to slow down or avoid you so get out of my way". When I do give way to someone and do them a favour in traffic it just confuses people and has nearly caused me accidents because drivers here are not used to selfless acts on the road. If you don't drive selfishly here then you are a danger to others. How ridiculous is that?

That's not to say there aren't bad drivers here, I don't think I've ever seen a woman driver who is not talking on the phone with her right hand holding the phone to her left ear. I've almost been rear ended multiple times by some idiot who has no idea how to predict a few seconds in front of him.

All of this is ONLY the driving side of things in this country, there are many other dangerous aspects to this country. I don't want my kids to have any of this mindset as a driver or as a pedestrian.

Maybe 'your'real fear is seeing your half thai kids being more Thai than your nationality.

Think a minute about the psychological effect of telling your kids that half of their being is no good. I'm no psychologist but seen the results - low self esteem, depression, drug addiction etc.

You can do this in many ways - for example taking them to playgroups that speak English, shielding them from Thai TV, and general racist comments based on your own ignorance of the society. Remember, whether you like it or not, your kids are 50 % Thai.

No. You keep trying to over analyse this and apply some deep psychological misgiving on my behalf but I can assure you, I literally am afraid that my kids will be injured or killed here before they reach school leaving age because I see the dangers everywhere. Do you ever read the news here?? That's just what is reported. My partner's cousin's 3 family members who were killed by a drunk hit and run wasn't in the news, the police didn't even make a report about it until her family complained. The 13 year old shot in the head in this small village was also not in any news. The deaths and accidents here are much higher than reported and what's reported is already horrific enough.

If I had some problems with having half Thai kids because I hate Thai people like you are insinuating then I wouldn't have had 2 kids with a Thai girl and we wouldn't spend all of our days with all of her Thai family.

So no, its much more simple than you are trying to make it. It is exactly what I have explained here.

It is a big decision for you to make and maybe I am over analyzing. But your children's mental well-being should also be in the picture.

Have you thought of moving out the village. I agree with you that they are dangerous places.

One thing my kids don't have is the freedom to go where they want to play like I did. I walked to school with friends when I was 4 years old. Having 2 beautiful white-skinned daughters with brown hair means I can't let them out my sight for a second.

My eldest wants to study in Scotland when 15. I plan to send her there for a couple of months per year for a couple of years to help her/me decide.

[ava15]

Not every school in the UK suffers from these problems mentioned in this topic.

For instance, my school experience from age 4 to 16 I think I witnessed one or two fights in the playground which were hardly more than headlocks and kick to the shins.

Id dare suggest a good % of schools in the UK are not unruly in the slightest.

My main concern for my kids here is that they will always be considered different in thailand whereas in the UK most strangers will assume they are british and speak fluent english without having said a word.

Walking around cities in the UK myself, if I see someone from an ethnic minority group I assume they are british and part of our society.

I also couldnt care less or treat anyone differently if they are "foreign" back home.

[KunMatt]

Neeranam

 

If i was to live in Thailand  i'd be worried (for my child) about the drivers who are some of the worst in the world and have been proven not to care less about killing people. Hardly neurotic it is a fact that crossing roads in Thailand is like putting ones life in the hands of others.

 

Its aspects of this mindset that is accepted by Thais that is one reason for her spend minimal time there and to be brought up thinking like the English.

 

Though to be brought up nowhere near the new English underclass who are an embarrassment to themselves is obviously a prerequisite.

 

It's not just the drivers that are a danger here, pedestrians and scooter drivers don't seem to care in the slightest for their own safety. I don't know how many times just this week I've been driving full speed down a highway and a pedestrian (or group of) have decided that they need to cross in the middle of a main road and even though there are no cars behind me they decide that it is worth being hit by a speeding pickup and run out in front of me instead of just waiting 5 seconds for a clear road to walk across.  I will never understand that mentality and if I didn't expect it and take precautionary measures to avoid them I would have killed somebody by now.

 

The same goes for scooter drivers who seem to think they are in an armoured tank.  I know that 100% of the time that when I see a scooter coming down a side road at 50km/h to join a main road that they are not going to give way at the junction or even slow down, they are going to pull straight out, come out of the scooter lane and encroach into the inside lane before turning and then checking over their shoulder to see if any cars are coming. 100% OF THE TIME. Again, I make it my responsibility to not kill these people which is ridiculous.

 

I don't think that this is all about bad drivers. This is about a mindset here of one-upsmanship and people are willing to cause a horrific accident and potential kill themselves, their own family and mine, just for the win of getting in front of me and saving themselves a few seconds in traffic.  If anyone drives here you will know exactly what I mean. Selfishness doesn't fully cover it as it is just another extension of this face system where somebody doesn't want to give way to another because it means they've lost. Every time I signal to change lanes the car who has been behind me for miles in the lane I want to go into will all of a sudden speed up so I cannot change lanes and get infront of him (even though I am already infront of him in another lane), what is that if not just pure bloodymindness? That happens every time I try to change lanes.

 

I see the difference between the UK and Thai drivers as this: In the UK if you flash your lights at someone it means "I am giving you way and letting you go first", in Thailand it means "I am coming and not going to slow down or avoid you so get out of my way".  When I do give way to someone and do them a favour in traffic it just confuses people and has nearly caused me accidents because drivers here are not used to selfless acts on the road. If you don't drive selfishly here then you are a danger to others. How ridiculous is that?

 

That's not to say there aren't bad drivers here,  I don't think I've ever seen a woman driver who is not talking on the phone with her right hand holding the phone to her left ear.  I've almost been rear ended multiple times by some idiot who has no idea how to predict a few seconds in front of him.

 

All of this is ONLY the driving side of things in this country, there are many other dangerous aspects to this country.  I don't want my kids to have any of this mindset as a driver or as a pedestrian.

Maybe 'your'real fear is seeing your half thai kids being more Thai than your nationality.

Think a minute about the psychological effect of telling your kids that half of their being is no good. I'm no psychologist but seen the results - low self esteem, depression, drug addiction etc.

You can do this in many ways - for example taking them to playgroups that speak English, shielding them from Thai TV, and general racist comments based on your own ignorance of the society. Remember, whether you like it or not, your kids are 50 % Thai.

No. You keep trying to over analyse this and apply some deep psychological misgiving on my behalf but I can assure you, I literally am afraid that my kids will be injured or killed here before they reach school leaving age because I see the dangers everywhere. Do you ever read the news here?? That's just what is reported. My partner's cousin's 3 family members who were killed by a drunk hit and run wasn't in the news, the police didn't even make a report about it until her family complained. The 13 year old shot in the head in this small village was also not in any news. The deaths and accidents here are much higher than reported and what's reported is already horrific enough.

If I had some problems with having half Thai kids because I hate Thai people like you are insinuating then I wouldn't have had 2 kids with a Thai girl and we wouldn't spend all of our days with all of her Thai family.

So no, its much more simple than you are trying to make it. It is exactly what I have explained here.

It is a big decision for you to make and maybe I am over analyzing. But your children's mental well-being should also be in the picture.

Have you thought of moving out the village. I agree with you that they are dangerous places.

One thing my kids don't have is the freedom to go where they want to play like I did. I walked to school with friends when I was 4 years old. Having 2 beautiful white-skinned daughters with brown hair means I can't let them out my sight for a second.

My eldest wants to study in Scotland when 15. I plan to send her there for a couple of months per year for a couple of years to help her/me decide.

Well obviously they wouldn't grow up in this village which is why I was referencing Bangkok international schools before. But even so, is Bangkok any more safe? I always see turf wars on the news between rival schools and high school kids being shot and stabbed to death by a gang of kids from another school.in Bangkok.

I'm guessing being half farang is going to work against my children when it comes to bullying in and out of school, something which would be much less prevalent if we lived in the UK. In fact the minority kids were revered in my schools growing up. And incidentally my children look more European than Thai so it would be a factor if we stayed in Thailand.

I grew up in a lovely big village in the UK on the coast. Our village had a beach, a wood, farms, a huge road of amusements, local sports teams, swimming pools, cubs and scouts clubs, a first, middle and high school and I just remember biking and skateboarding all around the village growing up knowing everyone. I am prepared to move back there and hope my kids have a similar upbringing that I got. I cannot see now how it can be any better chancing it in Thailand given everything discussed so far in this thread. We can just come back every summer holidays and stay in our house here to visit everyone.

If what I'm saying is total lunacy then please help convince me otherwise.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Not every school in the UK suffers from these problems mentioned in this topic.

For instance, my school experience from age 4 to 16 I think I witnessed one or two fights in the playground which were hardly more than headlocks and kick to the shins.

Id dare suggest a good % of schools in the UK are not unruly in the slightest.

My main concern for my kids here is that they will always be considered different in thailand whereas in the UK most strangers will assume they are british and speak fluent english without having said a word.

Walking around cities in the UK myself, if I see someone from an ethnic minority group I assume they are british and part of our society.

I also couldnt care less or treat anyone differently if they are "foreign" back home.

ํำ้Yep, I agree white boys in the west never see much racism as children, different if you're the darky though.

If you are thinking the bullies won't spot a 'slightly tanned' skin, you're kidding yourself!

Funny thing about Thai schools, although Thais generally don't like foreigners, they do like Thais with foreigner features, nose and whiter skin.

Edited July 27, 2013 by AnotherOneAmerican

[benalibina]

Many years ago my friends' kids went to the best international school in Bangkok.

Cost him over 1 million baht a year for 2 of them.

One day, whilst taking to the 17 year old a Thai woman walked in the front gate. I asked who it was told her grandmother but she never talked to her. She lived in a house next door.

why not speak to your gran?

She is thai.

But you are half thai.

No I am American.

But you live in Thailand and your mum's thai.

But my dad's American and I've been brought up that way.

Then I thought these kids were going to have problems.

Now in their mid - late 20s, both attend 12 step groups, for different conditions.

Their dad is the nicest guy you could meet and sacrificed everything for his kids. Foreign universities etc.

One thing I think he missed was to educate them in their thai roots and to be proud of being Thai and not ashamed.

On your last paragraph; i believe it happens many times ' the other way around as well ' !

[Bof]

Many years ago my friends' kids went to the best international school in Bangkok.

Cost him over 1 million baht a year for 2 of them.

One day, whilst taking to the 17 year old a Thai woman walked in the front gate. I asked who it was told her grandmother but she never talked to her. She lived in a house next door.

why not speak to your gran?

She is thai.

But you are half thai.

No I am American.

But you live in Thailand and your mum's thai.

But my dad's American and I've been brought up that way.

Then I thought these kids were going to have problems.

Now in their mid - late 20s, both attend 12 step groups, for different conditions.

Their dad is the nicest guy you could meet and sacrificed everything for his kids. Foreign universities etc.

One thing I think he missed was to educate them in their thai roots and to be proud of being Thai and not ashamed.

.If a grandma treats her grand kids this way, she is a compldte heartless, brainwashed moron who deserves to rot in thainess delusion .

[benalibina]

Many years ago my friends' kids went to the best international school in Bangkok.

Cost him over 1 million baht a year for 2 of them.

One day, whilst taking to the 17 year old a Thai woman walked in the front gate. I asked who it was told her grandmother but she never talked to her. She lived in a house next door.

why not speak to your gran?

She is thai.

But you are half thai.

No I am American.

But you live in Thailand and your mum's thai.

But my dad's American and I've been brought up that way.

Then I thought these kids were going to have problems.

Now in their mid - late 20s, both attend 12 step groups, for different conditions.

Their dad is the nicest guy you could meet and sacrificed everything for his kids. Foreign universities etc.

One thing I think he missed was to educate them in their thai roots and to be proud of being Thai and not ashamed.

.If a grandma treats her grand kids this way, she is a compldte heartless, brainwashed moron who deserves to rot in thainess delusion .

Double standards ?? Oh yes, many expats like to blame the thais and make allowances for their own sort. Same same but different ! They must have adapted quite well. Unknowingly.

[Boo]

where was the thai mother? the thai relatives?. Why was it up to the father to educate his kids on being thai. They already identified with their western heritage, surely living in thailand & near thai relatives, it was up tot hem to ensure the children were included & taught.

[Boo]

My son is 6, born in UK spent a year when he was younger in Thailand & decided to settle in UK. He goes to a great school in the suburbs, no racial issues, his school is very diverse, no bullying, they have a strict policy on it. He is excelling & attends a thai tutor once a week to make sure he is up to scratch with his literacy & language skills.

And to whoever claimed that thai & Uk schools basically teach the same, no, they don't. My son learns world & UK history, religious studies, sciences, social sciences, art, french & over 4hrs a week of physical education. Cricket, Rugby & Football plus 1hr of swimming. All on topic of the basic maths & reading.

[Puyai]

Is Education the be all and end all. Unfortunately Education is here for a reason and it is not to benefit the vast majority. Watch this video, it explains my point.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDZFcDGpL4U&feature=share

[Puyai]

Is Education the be all and end all. Unfortunately Education is here for a reason and it is not to benefit the vast majority. Watch this video, it explains my point.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDZFcDGpL4U&feature=share

[Puyai]

Is Education the be all and end all. Unfortunately Education is here for a reason and it is not to benefit the vast majority. Watch this video, it explains my point.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDZFcDGpL4U&feature=share

[Chicken George]

Wow very emotive subject and hard it seems for lots of us to make a final decision on whats best to do.. well I stick to my original thought on the the subject. I think my children are better off here . 9 years and 3 years. My eldest is fluent in English spoken and written. His Thai is as good as any other thais. He reads and writes Chinese ..Nowseeing that Asia is moving forward and Many of our home countrys are stagnating commerce wise I see his future here.. but he they have British passports and relations in two elder brothers from my first marriage so can go to work live there if they do wish.. if they go now to the UK they will forget their Thai and Thai studies.. They have more choice being here. Who knows the future but its worked out well so far.. one major point is that many of us who have have children with a Thai is that if we are from the UK we can take our children back but not the wife. No not unless we have a place to live or rent and enough income. So you people who come here and have kids make sure you are sure before you commit to having kids.. The original OP may fall in love but want to back to the UK but may not be able to leave and go back with his new love if he changes his mind... Big decisions. My life is here and I will make sure I do my best by my kids and wife.. Better or better..lol

[Chicken George]

Wow very emotive subject and hard it seems for lots of us to make a final decision on whats best to do.. well I stick to my original thought on the the subject. I think my children are better off here . 9 years and 3 years. My eldest is fluent in English spoken and written. His Thai is as good as any other thais. He reads and writes Chinese ..Nowseeing that Asia is moving forward and Many of our home countrys are stagnating commerce wise I see his future here.. but he they have British passports and relations in two elder brothers from my first marriage so can go to work live there if they do wish.. if they go now to the UK they will forget their Thai and Thai studies.. They have more choice being here. Who knows the future but its worked out well so far.. one major point is that many of us who have have children with a Thai is that if we are from the UK we can take our children back but not the wife. No not unless we have a place to live or rent and enough income. So you people who come here and have kids make sure you are sure before you commit to having kids.. The original OP may fall in love but want to back to the UK but may not be able to leave and go back with his new love if he changes his mind... Big decisions. My life is here and I will make sure I do my best by my kids and wife.. Better or better..lol

[Chicken George]

Puyai.. excellent link.. how very true the genius is educated out if us... food for though. Glad to say Iam different from the pack ... as many who live here in Thailand as Expats are. Maybe thats why so many fight here verbally and phsically. Lol

[ArranP]

I have 2 children, girl aged 5 and boy aged 2, born in the UK but now live in Phuket, and they goto the British International School.

I am recently divorced and have nanny to help me raise them. I stay in Thailand because i) its warm here and ii) the children can see and know their mum who lives in Nakhon Sawan.

To make the best of what is my situation, I ask myself where in Thailand should I live ? Phuket or Bangkok, ( I don't see I can live anywhere else in Thailand due to the location of the international schools )

I think if I stay in Phuket, it gives the children a "baan nok" (countryside) environment to grow up in. However due to Phuket being a remote island, I'm afraid I would need to establish a "business" here to give them when they come to leave school, so they can have an income similar to what they would get in Bangkok. ( I currently I anticipate 100k baht per month at todays levels is needed per person)

If I were to live in Bangkok, I would like to put them into Bangkok Patana School, and choose an housing estate within 30 minutes drive of the school. In Bangkok they would i) be open to large social circle ii) have a large city to explore iii) have access to all the jobs in Bangkok when they leave school, with city salaries (i would image) upto 100k per month per person.

I ask myself, do I want my children to grow up in a countryside "baan nok" environment or a well connected city environment with lots of jobs?

I know myself as I child I grew up in a countryside/town environment, I enjoyed the play, relaxed pace of life, and I think I would like the same for my children. But, I would not like to remove any chance from them of earning an "good" income, which I feel they would get if they grew up in Bangkok, but maybe more difficult for them to get if they grew up in Phuket ?

This is as far as I have come in my thinking, I have lived in Thailand for a year and half now....

Edited August 23, 2013 by ArranP

[jrtmedic]

The aim of educating children should be with regard to maximising their individual potential, whilst at the same time providing the moral base from which children become good citizens. When children leave school as a minimum they should be competent readers, be confident with figures and be able to write clearly . Without these minimum skills youngsters are virtually unemployable and only the most menial of jobs will be available.

State provided education in Thailand is poor and children lag behind the achievements of other Asian countries children.

Unless I could afford the 500-600,000 for private education at one of (few) good international schools I would not educate a child of mine in Thailand.

Speak to a Western Thai University Lecturer to gain a real understanding of the mediocrity of Thai State Education.

Edited August 23, 2013 by jrtmedic

[ArranP]

The aim of educating children should be with regard to maximising their individual potential, whilst at the same time providing the moral base from which children become good citizens. When children leave school as a minimum they should be competent readers, be confident with figures and be able to write clearly . Without these minimum skills youngsters are virtually unemployable and only the most menial of jobs will be available.

State provided education in Thailand is poor and children lag behind the achievements of other Asian countries children.

Unless I could afford the 500-600,000 for private education at one of (few) good international schools I would not educate a child of mine in Thailand.

Speak to a Western Thai University Lecturer to gain a real understanding of the mediocrity of Thai State Education.

Are both British International School Phuket and Bangkok Patana School, in your opinion two of the "few" ?

[StreetCowboy]

I have 2 children, girl aged 5 and boy aged 2, born in the UK but now live in Phuket, and they goto the British International School.

I am recently divorced and have nanny to help me raise them. I stay in Thailand because i) its warm here and ii) the children can see and know their mum who lives in Nakhon Sawan.

To make the best of what is my situation, I ask myself where in Thailand should I live ? Phuket or Bangkok, ( I don't see I can live anywhere else in Thailand due to the location of the international schools )

I think if I stay in Phuket, it gives the children a "baan nok" (countryside) environment to grow up in. However due to Phuket being a remote island, I'm afraid I would need to establish a "business" here to give them when they come to leave school, so they can have an income similar to what they would get in Bangkok. ( I currently I anticipate 100k baht per month at todays levels is needed per person)

If I were to live in Bangkok, I would like to put them into Bangkok Patana School, and choose an housing estate within 30 minutes drive of the school. In Bangkok they would i) be open to large social circle ii) have a large city to explore iii) have access to all the jobs in Bangkok when they leave school, with city salaries (i would image) upto 100k per month per person.

I ask myself, do I want my children to grow up in a countryside "baan nok" environment or a well connected city environment with lots of jobs?

I know myself as I child I grew up in a countryside/town environment, I enjoyed the play, relaxed pace of life, and I think I would like the same for my children. But, I would not like to remove any chance from them of earning an "good" income, which I feel they would get if they grew up in Bangkok, but maybe more difficult for them to get if they grew up in Phuket ?

This is as far as I have come in my thinking, I have lived in Thailand for a year and half now....

I'm surprised that you expect your children to work anywhere near their school. Perhaps near their university...

If you're only expecting them to compete for jobs in Thailand then you're probably wasting money sending them to the British school, and you'd be better getting them into a school with better Thai connections... But if they're at the British school, then they ought to be expecting to compete with the best in the world from all over the world wherever they go next. Perhaps living too long in Thailand has made your thinking very insular...

None of my friends from when I was five live anywhere near where they went to school (not strictly true - I think one fellow might have come back to the town after a career in Russia and Poland, as he had a facebook photo of his lad playing for the town rugby club, while another has recently bought the same flat that his parents had, as a holiday base, though he still lives in Paris or Bruxelles or somewhere). I imagine when your lad graduates around 2030, the workforce will be no less mobile - especially for people with a good education...

We're now making plans to relocate back to the Old Country for educational reasons, but it's not the school fees or the academic standards that are the concern. I'm more worried about freedom and personal development outside of school, and future university access.

SC