What would you do?

[CharlieH]

You decide for whatever reason to leave your home country. You meet a Thai lady and decide that Thailand is great and you enjoy it so much and things with new love are great so you make the move.

Everything is rosy,you have money so you start a business which works well, after two years, business is still good, relatiinship fine, you decide to stop renting and you buy land and build a house.

Now, you havnt done this before, would never be able to afford such a thing in the home country. So it new and exciting, build your dream home and everything to go in it, car etc.

Wind the clock forward 5 years, relationship is now having problems, Thailand while once quaint and different is now annoying and irritating in many ways, the business through no fault is now deminishing rapidly through lack of demand, money is becoming tight, the dream home cant be sold as its too big and expensive for anyone local to possibly afford. It may sell but would probably take a long time if at all.

You have no family remainig, you are effectively alone, you have had one or two health scares and feel a little scared and worried what to do for the future.

You are "all in" financially in Thailand and besides which the main asset, is in the wifes ultimate control.

Bottom line, savings dwindling, too old to get a job, relationship fading, no family or friends for support, cant "go home" as no one there anyway now, what would you do?

This isnt me, but it coukd happen to any of us, its a person I happened upon in a coffee shop, got talking and he broke down, pretty miserable state, upset and in need of a friend, I am merely looking for input from others to try to help figure something out for this guy.

There may be someone here thats been through similiar that can provide some guidance, I cant think and deal with it totally myself but I am trying to help with emotional support etc. Please guys no smart arse remarks or I told you so's, that wont help and isnt constructive, ideas and recommendations are whats needed, many heads are better than one as they say.

What would you recommend this guy do?

[AYJAYDEE]

depends how old he is, does he have a pension?

Edited November 7, 2013 by AYJAYDEE

[CharlieH]

depends how old he is, does he have a pension?

I dont know specifically but I would say around 60, no company pension, would get state pension later.

No formal education or degree etc so teaching is out.

Edited November 7, 2013 by CharlieH

[soi41]

Get a computer so he can write his own posts!!

On behalf of a friend??

[AYJAYDEE]

depends how old he is, does he have a pension?

I dont know specifically but I would say around 60, no company pension, would get state pension later.

No formal education or degree etc so teaching is out.

plenty of guys are teaching without credentials. he could rent in isaan pretty cheaply. some others here might have advice how he might get SOME equity out of the house, perhaps enough to front a non-o retirement thing. and of course he could go back to where he came from.

Edited November 7, 2013 by AYJAYDEE

[CharlieH]

Get a computer so he can write his own posts!!

On behalf of a friend??

Really constructive, please fight the urge to respond.

[Upnotover]

Friend of mine was in a similar situation, no way to stay here, no assets here or back home (UK). But he did the only thing he could which was to go back to the and let the government look after him. At 60 in the UK you get pension credit, a room/flat and help with bills and the NHS. A shock to the system maybe but better than being here with absolutely nothing that's for sure.

[alfieconn]

I'd go home, generally you can survive in a western world country without any money but you can't in Thailand !

[CharlieH]

Friend of mine was in a similar situation, no way to stay here, no assets here or back home (UK). But he did the only thing he could which was to go back to the and let the government look after him. At 60 in the UK you get pension credit, a room/flat and help with bills and the NHS. A shock to the system maybe but better than being here with absolutely nothing that's for sure.

Thanks for this, it was kind of where I got to with it , and its good to see a support for that option.

Thats what we need, a duscussion of options, that he can ultimately make the choice.

[Stradavarius37]

Tell your "friend" to sell out, get a plane ticket, and go back home - so he can be a burden to his own home country's social safety net.

Edited November 7, 2013 by Stradavarius37

[simple1]

If the guy has run out of options why not put the house on the market at a really compelling price; something is better than nothing

[FiftyTwo]

I wouldn't have bought a home for someone else (outright).

My mrs has a 25 year home loan, if we part not my problem.

The first rule for people who only have savings, don't spend the savings on something foolish.

(Like a house and business for someone else)

It can't happen to everyone, only someone fairly foolish.

His options, go home or go Pattaya balcony.

Edited November 7, 2013 by FiftyTwo

[bonobo]

Water under the bridge, but this is exactly why I have not cut my ties with my home country. I have two homes there, one not-so-nice and paid for, the other in which I lose a bit each month but to where I could easily go back and live.

I have a ThaiVisa friend who became estranged from his family and made a new life here. He was happy until suffering a series of strokes and had to return to the US for extended treatment and therapy, all with nothing there except for his earned medical care, which was something, at least. After that, I decided that I would always keep a possible recourse back home in case things soured here in Thailand.

That doesn't help your friend, but I think it is good advice if it is possible to do so.

[CharlieH]

I wouldn't have bought a home for someone else (outright).

My mrs has a 25 year home loan, if we part not my problem.

The first rule for people who only have savings, don't spend the savings on something foolish.

(Like a house and business for someone else)

It can't happen to everyone, only someone fairly foolish.

His options, go home or go Pattaya balcony.

So, we have .....you were foolish , go home, or commit suicide!

Outstanding compassionate contribution.

[Bluetongue]

Are the relationship problems all or in part due to the financial strains of diminished savings and return from business?. If so get out with whatever he can from the house and property if anything, as he doesn't like Thailand any more - go home. If the relationship can be saved ie problems are not financial then that would be an option surely.

[HeijoshinCool]

Uhm, what does he want to do?

[Travel2003]

How big problems is the relationship in?

How big economical trouble is he in?

Not unheard of that a divorced man must leave the house to his x-wife, back home in the West, and even continue to pay for the house/alimony.

At least the continuous payments will not be a big problem here if one breaks up.

Surely a 60 year old has enough life experience to make financial decisions.

He must be very pragmatic here.

[Mighty Mouse]

Never burn your bridges with your country of birth.

Never buy property in Thailand when renting is usually a much cheaper option.

Never put your life savings into any Thai business.

Never continue to fund a failing Thai business.

Never put your health in last place on the important list.

Never believe that your li'l Thai darling will always be YOUR li'l Thai darling.

Never disregard your common sense instincts.

....and most importantly, when the <deleted> hits the fan....

Never try to end your life by jumping off a tall building.

[beachproperty]

WOW!....tough one.

First thing he needs to do is cut back on his monthly expenses...Ie...no air condition, simpler meals (and if possible grow his own), Get down to the basic's before its too late.

Second....Start selling stuff NOW! Downsize from a car to motorbike (or public transport better), Have yard sales (get rid of all the crap that has been collected), Put the house up for sale at a reasonable price .....NOW! ...

Problem is if he keeps thinking about it (thinking and not doing is what got him into this situation NOW....it didn't just happen overnight...he should've been doing the above when the signs first started showing long before.....oh well ....)

He's in it now ....and needs to ACT NOW

Not sure what else he CAN do ...so ...can only hope the best for him.....Sad to hear...but seems like a common story here in Thailand

[HardenedSoul]

Quite a few dumbass responses from the smug tossers who think it could never happen to them.

Although it's unlikely that one's pension will vanish, wasn't it just a few months ago that declining exchange rate threads ran to 20+ pages? How many of us know folks who've had to bail out of Thailand because of weaknesses in their home currency?

Personally, i wouldn't want to chance working illegally but if he's up for it, he could get a teaching job somewhere . . . if he can be bothered doing that to remain in a country he no longer likes so much anyway.

He could sell the house at a knock-down price and use the proceeds to teach himself a way to make dosh online or something

Failing that, he'd do well to start working on his attitude toward returning home . . . right now

[David48]

Difficult call.

First question would be his age? "too old to get a job"

Second ... what awaits him back in his home country, supporting relatives, government support etc?

Yep, read that "cant "go home" as no one there anyway now" ... but there is the support of his fellow country men etc ...

I read that he is ... "all in" financially in Thailand ... but he must have some savings ... a little bit?

"relationship fading" ... needs a little expansion. Time line till inevitable death (of the relationship).

Is there a pension?

What visible means of support does he have?

It's easy to be a keyboard warrior ... dishing out advice here and there. But facts dictate the viable options.

All I know that, being in Thailand, without any visible means of support, fiscally and emotionally, is a slow painful death.

Maybe young Charles can infill a few blanks ...

.

[Showbags]

Here is your answer ...I would do this also.

[David48]

Here is your answer ...I would do this also.

* sigh * ...

Before anyone else wastes their time looking that that link.

The opening lines are ...

"A man from Las Vegas in the US has decided to sell off one his testicles so he can earn almost $37,000.

Mark Parisi is a self-confessed "cheap skate" who regularly earns extra dollars by renting out his body to scientists for medical testing.

He says the scheme has saved him nearly $160,000 over two years and he is currently involved in an Ebola virus trial that pays $5,245 a week."

[I knew this would happen]

I just looked up if there is an English counterpart to my favourite German saying, and yes there is:

It's better to make a painful break than draw out the agony.....

What are the reasons for staying in Thailand when there is no secure income or job, no more family or friends to rely on, no healthcare, visa problems, possible arguments with ex wife/family.....there are only some good memories left and that´s maybe all, nothing worth to fight for in this case IMHO. Starting over back home might seem hard too, but at least there is no need to worry for basic things and after a while life might go back to normal. That´s less likely to happen in Thailand.

[flyingdoc]

I should would reiterate also that home ties should NEVER be severed under any circumstances/

Moving and living in another country can always be precarious, however enticing it might seem at the time, but even though I work full-time

in Anti-aging Medicine (AAM), the only certain thing about life, is that one day we will die! How and when we do is what matters! I would advise your friend to move back to the safety net of his home country. It seems that his Thai dream has passed its sell-by date ! A story which is alas, all too common!

[wileycoyote]

Never burn your bridges with your country of birth.

Never buy property in Thailand when renting is usually a much cheaper option.

Never put your life savings into any Thai business.

Never continue to fund a failing Thai business.

Never put your health in last place on the important list.

Never believe that your li'l Thai darling will always be YOUR li'l Thai darling.

Never disregard your common sense instincts.

....and most importantly, when the <deleted> hits the fan....

Never try to end your life by jumping off a tall building.

Sound advice

Find a new life in a new country !

[mad mary]

I should would reiterate also that home ties should NEVER be severed under any circumstances/

Moving and living in another country can always be precarious, however enticing it might seem at the time, but even though I work full-time

in Anti-aging Medicine (AAM), the only certain thing about life, is that one day we will die! How and when we do is what matters! I would advise your friend to move back to the safety net of his home country. It seems that his Thai dream has passed its sell-by date ! A story which is alas, all too common!

Anti aging medicine lol ...how does that work ? Go'ed give me a Eureka moment !!!

[munchlet]

This advice does not apply to the unfortunate person who finds themselves in this situation, I have seen it countless times since I have been associated with Thaialnd, which is thirty years now.

Advice, to anyone setting up a business or looking at acquiring assets. Get it right from the start!! Do not put assets in the name of girfriend or wife. Set up a a company with A shares and B shares. The Thai owns the A shares and the Farang owns the B shares. The B shares have nearly all the voting rights and dividend rights. The A shares have nothing, but on paper own the majority stake in the business thereby making the structure legally compliant. Simples as the Meerkats would say!! For those farangs owning property, put it in the name of a company too. Also write yourself a lease to yourself from the company for a term of 30yrs+30 yrs+30 yrs. And Register it with the land dept. This gives an extra layer of protection. All perfecitly legal.

Beauty is skin deep, your assets have to be protected to last (both) of you a lifetime. Get it right from the beginning and avoid the porblems later down the line!!!!

[Showbags]

This advice does not apply to the unfortunate person who finds themselves in this situation, I have seen it countless times since I have been associated with Thaialnd, which is thirty years now.

Advice, to anyone setting up a business or looking at acquiring assets. Get it right from the start!! Do not put assets in the name of girfriend or wife. Set up a a company with A shares and B shares. The Thai owns the A shares and the Farang owns the B shares. The B shares have nearly all the voting rights and dividend rights. The A shares have nothing, but on paper own the majority stake in the business thereby making the structure legally compliant. Simples as the Meerkats would say!! For those farangs owning property, put it in the name of a company too. Also write yourself a lease to yourself from the company for a term of 30yrs+30 yrs+30 yrs. And Register it with the land dept. This gives an extra layer of protection. All perfecitly legal.

Beauty is skin deep, your assets have to be protected to last (both) of you a lifetime. Get it right from the beginning and avoid the porblems later down the line!!!!

Ah...your experience is legendary grasshopper....30 + 30 + 30....wise words, I presume you have done this...and registered it right ?

[aveabeeror2]

Get a computer so he can write his own posts!!

On behalf of a friend??

Surely this has been flogged to death in the past!!!