Breaking point in Thailand

[homeseeker]

This video is troubling for all sorts of reasons. Given the obvious state of mind of this man, his apparent poverty etc., and the fact he is in charge of young and vulnerable children, those youngsters are at grave risk. Whatever nationality of the kids, state or private protection authorites need to be informed of the risk and appropriate action taken NOW.

Also:

It is clear Thailand is no place for a foreigner with insufficient resources who is very unwell especially someone having responsibility for children and so he and his family should get back or to the States as quickly as possible.

Edited December 19, 2013 by homeseeker

[NeverSure]

People can argue about the morality issues of fat people till the cows come home, but once a person reaches morbid obesity or super morbid obesity, the thing that really MATTERS is the medical issue.

If someone posted who had lung cancer from smoking would you be lecturing and shaming him about the mistakes he made in the past that created his condition? For what purpose? All I can see is CRUELTY.

I understand people are rubbed wrong by the video but considering his medical condition perhaps this is a cry for help. I'm not saying he is likely to GET adequate help but crying out for it, even very clumsily, is also certainly understandable.

Humans have flaws. You might think you are strong and invincible but you will experience suffering in your life too. Do you want a pack of human hyenas lecturing you at that point?

I think a lot of this ugly reaction to this suffering man is a reflection of people's OWN insecurities. They FEAR such a a fate themselves and want to believe such bad things could NEVER happen to them because of their superior morality and greater control over their lives. But deep down they know a downfall CAN happen to anyone.

I don't see the connection. Once someone decides to start smoking, he has to know what the risk is.

What bothers me most about this guy besides blaming everyone else, is that he made so many bad choices, one right after the other, over time, and landed himself right where he is.

Even if we didn't notice that he's obese, he still burned his bridges in his home country, moved, got married, had kids... now he's down and out.

JT, my experience with people like this who have NO ONE to call to get a plane ticket and a couch to sleep on for a while back home, is that they've already used up all of their friends and relatives. I can't even guess how many people I could call if I was broke and hungry, but I've never used people. If I was broke in Thailand it would take just one phone call to get a ticket home and a place to sleep. I'd have to choose which phone call to make because there are many.

I don't think there is any way to get that far down with no helping friends over night, obese or not.

[Ulysses G.]

I think a lot of this ugly reaction to this suffering man is a reflection of people's OWN insecurities. They FEAR such a a fate themselves and want to believe such bad things could NEVER happen to them because of their superior morality and greater control over their lives. But deep down they know a downfall CAN happen to anyone.

Agreed. As far as him not having anyone to call back home, it can happen when you've lived here a long time, lost touch with your friends and your family has died off. It does not have to be because of anything that this guy has done wrong.

[rayongchelsea]

I think a lot of this ugly reaction to this suffering man is a reflection of people's OWN insecurities. They FEAR such a a fate themselves and want to believe such bad things could NEVER happen to them because of their superior morality and greater control over their lives. But deep down they know a downfall CAN happen to anyone.

Agreed. As far as him not having anyone to call back home, it can happen when you've lived here a long time, lost touch with your friends and your family has died off. It does not have to be because of anything that this guy has done wrong.

I think that argument is valid more for a retiree..the guy is still young(ish)

People who are ill equipped to move abroad, especially a place like Thailand shouldn't come here..

I don't get this own insecurities stuff..we know from the very minute we move abroad that it could all go tits up..it can do that in your home country..agreed it can happen to anyone, yet still people don't act accordingly..

Nothing to do with superior morality and control..

He just didn't face reality..as many don't here..

I for one have lost my wife to cancer, lost my job,raised a child single handedly, been scammed etc..you just have to get on with the cards life deals you..

He has choices..the choice to take his family home to the west..something not available to Thais who may find themselves in the same predicament.

[NeverSure]

I think a lot of this ugly reaction to this suffering man is a reflection of people's OWN insecurities. They FEAR such a a fate themselves and want to believe such bad things could NEVER happen to them because of their superior morality and greater control over their lives. But deep down they know a downfall CAN happen to anyone.

Agreed. As far as him not having anyone to call back home, it can happen when you've lived here a long time, lost touch with your friends and your family has died off. It does not have to be because of anything that this guy has done wrong.

I don't understand. I don't know you all that well, but well enough to know what you do, how responsible you are, and I would send you a plane ticket, give you a bedroom, and help you get set up with social services myself. You know some other guys I would do that for too.

It doesn't take that much to make a friend. This guy has burned everyone and everything and has no where to turn, apparently. Worse, he blames everyone else.

I'll bet if you were clear down, you'd be blaming yourself. Big difference.

Cheers.

[Hoven]

Are people actually trying to defend this lardass by saying he's too fat and hairy to get a job.

I think his radiating lack of self-respect is pulling you in!

[Hoven]

Listened to approximately 30 seconds of your BS. Life is good if you make it good. I think you

are a total scam looking for sympathy and some free money from some innocent people willing

to help out the needy....get off your fat butt, get a job, eat less, your family will have more food or

head back to "the States" where you can live off the welfare system.

I agree. He is a disgusting man in every way.

[Jingthing]

Listened to approximately 30 seconds of your BS. Life is good if you make it good. I think you

are a total scam looking for sympathy and some free money from some innocent people willing

to help out the needy....get off your fat butt, get a job, eat less, your family will have more food or

head back to "the States" where you can live off the welfare system.

I agree. He is a disgusting man in every way.

Would you say that to his face?

Oh, the humanity. (Where'd it go?)

[Sceptict11]

Thanks !

Always wondered about "red neck hillbillies " but did not realise they were allowed out of the Good ol US of A !

What a wonderful insight !

[Ulysses G.]

I'll bet if you were clear down, you'd be blaming yourself. Big difference.

You are right, but I still feel sorry for him. He is stuck in a foreign country with little hope of getting out of a very bad situation and I am not so sure that he is as much to blame as others think he is.

I have been here for a long time and my financial situation has gone up and down a few times. I have been lucky enough not to end up like him, but with a few bad breaks, I might have. There, but for the grace of God, go I.

Edited December 19, 2013 by Ulysses G.

[David48]

There, but for the grace of God, go I.

+1

A timely reminder for us all.

[Jingthing]

There, but for the grace of God, go I.

+1

A timely reminder for us all.

A message even an atheistic Festivus Poll celebrant can get behind!

Sent from my Lenovo S820_ROW using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[Hoven]

Listened to approximately 30 seconds of your BS. Life is good if you make it good. I think you

are a total scam looking for sympathy and some free money from some innocent people willing

to help out the needy....get off your fat butt, get a job, eat less, your family will have more food or

head back to "the States" where you can live off the welfare system.

I agree. He is a disgusting man in every way.

Would you say that to his face?

dam_n right I would. I have no respect for those who don't respect themselves and are a result of their own selfpity. If a verbal slap in the face would do them good then there is no problem in doing it.

If the guy is reading this, get off your ass, shave, put on a shirt n slacks, brush your teeth, and get on down to all the local Language Centers with a smile on your face.

Edited December 19, 2013 by Hoven

[thailiketoo]

One can only hope in the truth of the golden rule, karma or whatever.

[Briggsy]

This guy is very fat. His food bill must be 50,000 Baht a month. He is loaded.

[NeverSure]

I'll bet if you were clear down, you'd be blaming yourself. Big difference.

You are right, but I still feel sorry for him. He is stuck in a foreign country with little hope of getting out of a very bad situation and I am not so sure that he is as much to blame as others think he is.

I have been here for a long time and my financial situation has gone up and down a few times. I have been lucky enough not to end up like him, but with a few bad breaks, I might have. There, but for the grace of God, go I.

He's not going to get out of that situation unless he starts blaming himself and not others, and cleans up and starts hitting the language centers or does something productive other than ranting on YouTube.

Right now he's blaming everything but himself and expecting (or wishing) that others who don't even know him will bail him out. He has made a long string of choices that got him into this situation, and now it's everyone else's fault.

It would be a lot easier to choose to help him if his attitude was different. Any help you gave him would get sucked into a black hole and he'd be right back where is is, because he doesn't blame himself. If someone blames himself and sees what his problems are, then a hand up will actually help him.

This guy has to deal with himself and his attitude before anyone can do much to help him.

[GAZZPA]

"Listen to his rant."

Why? "Failing to plan is planning to fail."

Did you watch the video? He lost his job over here.

You're kidding, right? So what was his plan if he lost his job?

use his savings, problem is savings gone and still no job.. what do you have savings and back up savings?

[rgs2001uk]

I'll bet if you were clear down, you'd be blaming yourself. Big difference.

You are right, but I still feel sorry for him. He is stuck in a foreign country with little hope of getting out of a very bad situation and I am not so sure that he is as much to blame as others think he is.

I have been here for a long time and my financial situation has gone up and down a few times. I have been lucky enough not to end up like him, but with a few bad breaks, I might have. There, but for the grace of God, go I.

He's not going to get out of that situation unless he starts blaming himself and not others, and cleans up and starts hitting the language centers or does something productive other than ranting on YouTube.

Right now he's blaming everything but himself and expecting (or wishing) that others who don't even know him will bail him out. He has made a long string of choices that got him into this situation, and now it's everyone else's fault.

It would be a lot easier to choose to help him if his attitude was different. Any help you gave him would get sucked into a black hole and he'd be right back where is is, because he doesn't blame himself. If someone blames himself and sees what his problems are, then a hand up will actually help him.

This guy has to deal with himself and his attitude before anyone can do much to help him.

This guy has to deal with himself and his attitude before anyone can do much to help him.

You cannot help those who dont want to help themselves.

Too many are quite content to wallow in their own self pity.

Get a haircut and get a real job.

What happened to the famous Thai family network we keep hearing about?

[Jingthing]

Not everyone is practically employable. In my view, many super morbidly obese people fit into that category. Not every employable person can actually locate employment. That is amplified in Thailand for foreigners with restricted occupations and work permit rules. Wanting to work and actually having the work are two different things.

Edited December 19, 2013 by Jingthing

[farang000999]

wait... when you are morbidly obese the only way to lose weight is surgery not dieting? that defies physics.

[rgs2001uk]

Not everyone is practically employable. In my view, many super morbidly obese people fit into that category. Not every employable person can actually locate employment. That is amplified in Thailand for foreigners with restricted occupations and work permit rules. Wanting to work and actually having the work are two different things.

Talk about stating the obvious.

You would think after 13 years in Thailand even this guy would have taken this onboard.

Suggest he phones Oprah or Jerry Springer, he looks like ideal material for their shows.

[Jingthing]

wait... when you are morbidly obese the only way to lose weight is surgery not dieting? that defies physics.

Statistically the chances of long term weight loss to normal weight for someone morbidly obese or super morbidly obese (which I really think this guy is) is almost ZERO. Surgery doesn't cut the fat away, it alters the STOMACH size. There are a number of different options and the choice is individualized for each patient. It doesn't always work but the success rate is much higher than almost zero. The last time I checked, over 50 percent. It's really the only realistic hope and any competent doctor would say the same thing. More bad news, starting at super morbidly obese, realistically even "success" will usually mean still being obese, just less so. Yes you can find special cases of people who went from super morbidly obese to normal weight and kept it off, but statistically the chances of any individual doing that themselves is WAY under one percent. So not "impossible" but may as well be.

Edited December 19, 2013 by Jingthing

[Jingthing]

Not everyone is practically employable. In my view, many super morbidly obese people fit into that category. Not every employable person can actually locate employment. That is amplified in Thailand for foreigners with restricted occupations and work permit rules. Wanting to work and actually having the work are two different things.

Talk about stating the obvious.

You would think after 13 years in Thailand even this guy would have taken this onboard.

Suggest he phones Oprah or Jerry Springer, he looks like ideal material for their shows.

Yes, it's the obvious but it doesn't seem to register with the people yelling at him to get a job.

[NeverSure]

Not everyone is practically employable. In my view, many super morbidly obese people fit into that category. Not every employable person can actually locate employment. That is amplified in Thailand for foreigners with restricted occupations and work permit rules. Wanting to work and actually having the work are two different things.

JT, Who got him into this situation? Who made that long string of decisions including having a bunch of kids? Did he not know about the work rules before he started having a wife and kids?

Who put him into this situation, and why is he blaming everyone but himself?

Cheers

[taotoo]

It kept my attention for all of 30 seconds,at which point I'd had more than enough of the fat,whiny loser and turned it off!

The last 30 seconds are better than the first...

[donniereadit]

It's not all him. Like I said before when your that obese it's incredibly difficult to just go get a job anywhere due to discrimination, especially in Thailand where most Thais are skinny, and there are not too many options here anyhows.

It's also hard to do anything other then that when you have no flight ticket out and have to pay for 2 seats or first/business class due to obesity.

Putting on the weight is probably from the diabetes. Hardly his fault for that. It's like a cascading problem when you have a medical issue it affects other areas of your life and the problems snowball. If he's in significant pain on meds it would be quite difficult to work on your swollen diabetic feet all day teaching.

Sounds like relocating back to the US and getting disability or SSI would be the best option at this point. If he has worked in the past, or can get a job, work for awhile then claim disability down the road off that job, that would be a way to go but not completely above board obviously.

Send money back for family and build from there. Many people the world over relocate for work and it's not all roses.

Edited December 19, 2013 by donniereadit

[Jingthing]

Not everyone is practically employable. In my view, many super morbidly obese people fit into that category. Not every employable person can actually locate employment. That is amplified in Thailand for foreigners with restricted occupations and work permit rules. Wanting to work and actually having the work are two different things.

JT, Who got him into this situation? Who made that long string of decisions including having a bunch of kids? Did he not know about the work rules before he started having a wife and kids?

Who put him into this situation, and why is he blaming everyone but himself?

Cheers

I'm not fixated on blame and guilt trips like you are, so I'm not interested in your question. The guy has emotional issues likely related to the situation he is in, regardless of the complex factors that led to that. Who wouldn't?

Edited December 19, 2013 by Jingthing

[benalibina]

I think the guy is only on the forefront of his situation....acknowledgement of himself that he is to blame and not pointing only to others....is a first step....according to youtubevideo he aint there yet. So Neversure is IMO correct about that.

As his problems are accute the process of introspection conflicts with solving his present situation. Getting a job and thus money can bring ease temporarily it probably wont take away the underlying problems.

The familysituation of a wife banging his brother....doesnt help either.....as does his appearance and huge weight. He just has no time to solve all. Kids ??

He is in big problems and hopefully there are people willing to show or help him on the way out of it.

[Jingthing]

I agree any person who wants to start the recovery process must make a massive effort himself. That's an obvious given. I'm just saying that's not going to be enough. I doubt he can perform bariatric surgery on himself (he can't even pay for it).

[GAZZPA]

This poor guy, he is in a bad way. His attitude is a consequence of his situation, granted he needs to adjust his attitude as right now he is not helping himself. But it is hardly uncommon for someone to start blaming the world and feeling so bitter when you hit such a low,, I have seen it before. So why are so many people posting such negative stuff?

Give the guy a break, he needs some positive influence and hope to help him get his head straight. Half the posters on here are attacking this guy which is very easy to do when someone is so low, personally I am glad you are not friends of mine. Also, what's with the obese discussions? With everything he is going through surely you can leave this one alone. He maybe fat but he is hardly bed ridden so no need to go there, i have seen many fatter people then him working.

I see from youtube that he has a lot of positive feedback and he is making much more positive statements. So, I hope that his what he needed to snap out of it and get himself in gear for sorting it all out, personally I think that's all he needs,, some friendly advice (and some sustained effort).

Good luck to him, hope he is back on his feet soon.