Staying at the in laws in Phrae at Songkran - hold me

[bkkjames]

be a man and simple don't go

exactly...imagine 4-5 days of peace in quiet in your aircon abode compared to mossies, squatting, drunks, traffic jams .....

I reckon 10,000 baht should do the trick. That's only 2500 per day to avoid that headache.

A win win for her and you.

[pinkpanther99]

Maybe consider next time to marry a Thai lady of similar education, income and life experience and you'll be spending Songkran in Isaan at a proper house instead of some 3rd world hut.

Yes, you're quite right. I suppose you're one of the Thaivisa members with a hi-so Thai/Chinese girlfriend - everyone around here seems to have one of those apart from me.

Phrae isn't Isaan either - at least mine knows how to read a map.

[boisian]

I'm stuck in OZ for songkran - still never managed to be in TL for Songkran. Was going to go this time but after recently paying off the GF's 1millionfund village loan from 8 years ago because this year Yingluck said they could not reborrow, after paying hospital bill for GFs fathers grandson from a previous mia, and buying a block of land off the aunt to help her out, I am grounded

so your plea is falling on deaf ears.

enjoy it, you know you will

[bkkjames]

Maybe consider next time to marry a Thai lady of similar education, income and life experience and you'll be spending Songkran in Isaan at a proper house instead of some 3rd world hut.

Yes, you're quite right. I suppose you're one of the Thaivisa members with a hi-so Thai/Chinese girlfriend - everyone around here seems to have one of those apart from me.

Phrae isn't Isaan either - at least mine knows how to read a map.

stay on track here mate, dont get distracted, we are trying to help you avoid the forthcoming mess.

all you have to do is convince her that she will have a better time if you stay home. She wont have to worry about you feeling uncomfortable...etc

failing that fall out of a van and hurt your ankle and get a wheelchair

[BB1955]

I use to go to the inlaws every year for 6 years before we moved here . It was 4 or 5 days of pure hell . Hot no a/c one fan shared by all mosquitos the size of pigeons.... Sleep on the floor wake up to the chickens before the sun comes up . I used to go armed with sleeping pills that's the only way I could handle it ...... My days would be spent in a hammock under a palm tree just hoping a gust of wind would keep me cool ... Nowadays I send the wife alone she calls me everyday complaining how uncomfortable she is .... I say now you know how it was for me !!!!! Been here almost four years I have been once when we first came here ... But the flip side is now they come here ,,, not sure which is worse .....

[pinkpanther99]

Maybe consider next time to marry a Thai lady of similar education, income and life experience and you'll be spending Songkran in Isaan at a proper house instead of some 3rd world hut.

Yes, you're quite right. I suppose you're one of the Thaivisa members with a hi-so Thai/Chinese girlfriend - everyone around here seems to have one of those apart from me.

Phrae isn't Isaan either - at least mine knows how to read a map.

stay on track here mate, dont get distracted, we are trying to help you avoid the forthcoming mess.

all you have to do is convince her that she will have a better time if you stay home. She wont have to worry about you feeling uncomfortable...etc

failing that fall out of a van and hurt your ankle and get a wheelchair

Yes, noted, back on it now.

Someone mentioned the figure of 10K above, I'm going to dangle that carrot in front of her tonight and see if she bites.

[Metapod]

you gotta buy a boatload of stuff for them, as is standard. I suggest you buy it on the way in, that way you can control the expenditure. I suggest a couple bottles of Laokhao and maybe a couple cases of beer. Maybe a couple super size tins of crackers or cookies for the kids. I would also invest in a styrofoam cooler for the beer.

And I agree with the other posts - quietly book a hotel room nearby and then escape when you can. If it has a swimming pool and you are comfortable with it... you can have the kids over for a swim. They will love it. You can enjoy aircon and maybe just maybe it will have a TV with some sport on. A hotel will have a decent restaurant nearby.

And any day you just gotta get out of there - claim 'tong seeya' (diarrhea). Very believable. And you may not need to fake it.

Maybe if you are an old fossil visiting a hooker's family.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

[sam sen]

Thanks for the responses guys.

And for those asking, of course I know how to use google, and yes, I probably will book into a hotel in town.

Now let me make this point clear, the inlaws (and extended family) aren't bad people it's just that we have a completely different mindset and I know that it is inevitable that we will make the trip to Big C or Tesco Lotus with about 15 people huddled in the back of the pickup who will seemingly just come along for the ride - I didn't realise supermarkets were such an attraction!

Of course I could just say to the Mrs that I'm not going, plain and simple. However, whilst I really don't want to go, I'm trying to think of it from her point of view. Let's say the roles were reversed and she was in the UK at Christmas time, for example. I don't think I'd feel too great if she refused to visit my family during the Christmas period. Naturally, my family wouldn't look at her to pay for things at every given opportunity, but there you go!

And this will only be the 3rd time that her parents will be spending time with our daughter, so really it is only right that we go, to be fair.

Anyway, a successful relationship, no matter what of the world you live in is all about compromises and a bit of give and take, right? I figure now is just a time where I'm going to have to give a little more than usual!

The thing that concerns me more than the lack of facilities, the mozzies, the heat, the part of me being seen as the walking ATM, the upcountry blokes and their Laokhao induced ways...more than all this...the thing that concerns me most is that we are going to have to drive for 8 hrs during a time the road in Thailand are so unbelievably dangerous it actually beggars belief.

Naturally, my family wouldn't look at her to pay for things at every given opportunity, but there you go!

haha! could you imagine that, turning up at your family home with a GF/BF and the first thing you do is take them down the local supermarket and off license and telling them to get their wallet out to buy provisions for the all holiday partying - oh yes, and while we're here how about a new rice cooker, bedding, wardrobe...

[namdocmai]

Mate if you do go then can you keep an online diary here on TV? We all want to know what you eat/drink and what conversations you have in Thai language with the locals and the family.

You will be sleeping all day and partying all night, who doesn't want that? Maybe you even lost weight after that trip.

[Wordworx]

Maybe consider next time to marry a Thai lady of similar education, income and life experience and you'll be spending Songkran in Isaan at a proper house instead of some 3rd world hut.

Yes, you're quite right. I suppose you're one of the Thaivisa members with a hi-so Thai/Chinese girlfriend - everyone around here seems to have one of those apart from me.

Phrae isn't Isaan either - at least mine knows how to read a map.

stay on track here mate, dont get distracted, we are trying to help you avoid the forthcoming mess.

all you have to do is convince her that she will have a better time if you stay home. She wont have to worry about you feeling uncomfortable...etc

failing that fall out of a van and hurt your ankle and get a wheelchair

Yes, noted, back on it now.

Someone mentioned the figure of 10K above, I'm going to dangle that carrot in front of her tonight and see if she bites.

Yeah, that's the best idea yet. That way the money goes there, you (as baggage, basicly) do not. They can all just do their own (Thai village) thing, not worry about taking care of / trying to amuse the farang, while feeding you sh-t you don't want to eat, making you drink sh-t you don't want to drink... And your wife gets to be the bigshot, throw some cash around, show everybody that she's got it all under control. Absolutely worth it, 10-k. Maybe even more. You get to hang out in the hood, enjoy some private time, wife comes home (no doubt real glad to do so by then), you miss all that stress, boredom and hassle. Everybody is happy. >>> Go now, young man, make it so and take no prisoners.

[sam sen]

you gotta buy a boatload of stuff for them, as is standard. I suggest you buy it on the way in, that way you can control the expenditure. I suggest a couple bottles of Laokhao and maybe a couple cases of beer. Maybe a couple super size tins of crackers or cookies for the kids. I would also invest in a styrofoam cooler for the beer.

And I agree with the other posts - quietly book a hotel room nearby and then escape when you can. If it has a swimming pool and you are comfortable with it... you can have the kids over for a swim. They will love it. You can enjoy aircon and maybe just maybe it will have a TV with some sport on. A hotel will have a decent restaurant nearby.

And any day you just gotta get out of there - claim 'tong seeya' (diarrhea). Very believable. And you may not need to fake it.

Maybe if you are an old fossil visiting a hooker's family.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

totally agree, i have never been put in a position when i am expected to buy anything. i have always been a welcomed guest and treated well. then again i've never dated a prostitute...

[Donnie Brasco]

C'mon there pinkpanther99, big fella.

You are going to be a GUEST in the house of your girlfriend.

Be a shooter.

Show up with a bloody FAN and a couple of mosquito nets.

If you enthuse enough about how much you love the place you won't get dinged for building them a great big farangledangle palazzo.

Ya feel me ;-?

"Sometimes, 'fuggedabowdit' just means fuggedabowdit."

[pinkpanther99]

Mate if you do go then can you keep an online diary here on TV? We all want to know what you eat/drink and what conversations you have in Thai language with the locals and the family.

You will be sleeping all day and partying all night, who doesn't want that? Maybe you even lost weight after that trip.

Yes, IF i go, I'll post daily updates on Thaivisa.

Whilst the majority of members will be enjoying lunch at the Dusit Thani with their hi-so Thai/Chinese gfs, I'll be drinking Leo and posting on Thaivisa - actually not much a change from normal

[wym]

The thing that concerns me more than the lack of facilities, the mozzies, the heat, the part of me being seen as the walking ATM, the upcountry blokes and their Laokhao induced ways...more than all this...the thing that concerns me most is that we are going to have to drive for 8 hrs during a time the road in Thailand are so unbelievably dangerous it actually beggars belief.

hot tip: leave at 10pm, drop the dustbin lids & strife at the family seat with some sausage and mash, and crash at the hotel until afternoon.

(kids, wife, cash)

[pinkpanther99]

C'mon there pinkpanther99, big fella.

You are going to be a GUEST in the house of your girlfriend.

Be a shooter.

Show up with a bloody FAN and a couple of mosquito nets.

If you enthuse enough about how much you love the place you won't get dinged for building them a great big farangledangle palazzo.

Ya feel me ;-?

"Sometimes, 'fuggedabowdit' just means fuggedabowdit."

She's my wife and it's not like I'm going back to the village for the first time. I think some people responding to my predicament are getting mixed up, I've haven't just been hooked from the bar stool to the mud hut. We've been married for a year and she was my girlfriend for two years before that, so I've been to the village a few times in the past couple of years, which kind of makes it worse that I know what it will be like!

But, you make a valid point, a situation is what you make of it and if I turn up in the village miserable and with a long face, I'll have an awful 4 days. Turn up with a smile on my face, and go with the flow, I'm sure to have a decent time...eventually...after being woken up by chickens at 4am every morning, then having to shower with cold water, mentally preparing myself for a good couple of hours each morning to use the squat toilet, longing for the normal civilized world...not to worry, it's only 4 days.

[pinkpanther99]

you gotta buy a boatload of stuff for them, as is standard. I suggest you buy it on the way in, that way you can control the expenditure. I suggest a couple bottles of Laokhao and maybe a couple cases of beer. Maybe a couple super size tins of crackers or cookies for the kids. I would also invest in a styrofoam cooler for the beer.

And I agree with the other posts - quietly book a hotel room nearby and then escape when you can. If it has a swimming pool and you are comfortable with it... you can have the kids over for a swim. They will love it. You can enjoy aircon and maybe just maybe it will have a TV with some sport on. A hotel will have a decent restaurant nearby.

And any day you just gotta get out of there - claim 'tong seeya' (diarrhea). Very believable. And you may not need to fake it.

Maybe if you are an old fossil visiting a hooker's family.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

totally agree, i have never been put in a position when i am expected to buy anything. i have always been a welcomed guest and treated well. then again i've never dated a prostitute...

Sure, I agree. It's not so much that I've ever been put in a position where I'm expected to buy things either - maybe my mind has been swayed from reading too many comments on Thaivisa! Perhaps I'm worrying about a problem that isn't even there, it's just that my mind has been warped by the naysayers on here, it's hard to say.

And mine wasn't a prostitute either, she isn't nearly attractive enough!

[Metapod]

you gotta buy a boatload of stuff for them, as is standard. I suggest you buy it on the way in, that way you can control the expenditure. I suggest a couple bottles of Laokhao and maybe a couple cases of beer. Maybe a couple super size tins of crackers or cookies for the kids. I would also invest in a styrofoam cooler for the beer.

And I agree with the other posts - quietly book a hotel room nearby and then escape when you can. If it has a swimming pool and you are comfortable with it... you can have the kids over for a swim. They will love it. You can enjoy aircon and maybe just maybe it will have a TV with some sport on. A hotel will have a decent restaurant nearby.

And any day you just gotta get out of there - claim 'tong seeya' (diarrhea). Very believable. And you may not need to fake it.

Maybe if you are an old fossil visiting a hooker's family.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

totally agree, i have never been put in a position when i am expected to buy anything. i have always been a welcomed guest and treated well. then again i've never dated a prostitute...

Same as me.

Last time I spent 5 days in Udon Thani staying with her family and her friend's family. Wasn't asked or expected to pay for anything. Offered multiple times and refused. Thais are very good hosts in my experience.

[Toby Jugg]

To my mind Phrae and surroundings have a lot of charm, but needs looking for. If you want internet beware Maeyom Palace Hotel. Not available on every floor. Place full of foreign coach trippers. Try Phoomthai Gardens. Clean, friendly, good kitchen if you are tired of the family ~ and internet worked well in my room.

Good Luck. My idea of a fun Songkran is to be well clear of any Buddhist country.

[Minnehaha]

you gotta buy a boatload of stuff for them, as is standard. I suggest you buy it on the way in, that way you can control the expenditure. I suggest a couple bottles of Laokhao and maybe a couple cases of beer. Maybe a couple super size tins of crackers or cookies for the kids. I would also invest in a styrofoam cooler for the beer.

And I agree with the other posts - quietly book a hotel room nearby and then escape when you can. If it has a swimming pool and you are comfortable with it... you can have the kids over for a swim. They will love it. You can enjoy aircon and maybe just maybe it will have a TV with some sport on. A hotel will have a decent restaurant nearby.

And any day you just gotta get out of there - claim 'tong seeya' (diarrhea). Very believable. And you may not need to fake it.

Maybe if you are an old fossil visiting a hooker's family.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

totally agree, i have never been put in a position when i am expected to buy anything. i have always been a welcomed guest and treated well. then again i've never dated a prostitute...

Just to be clear to the idiots jumping to conclusions.

1. I am referring to experience visiting very poor farming family of a close friend of my wife's (and mine as well).

2. Neither women is or were hookers

3. If you do not acknowledge that Thais buy gifts for each other and understand this context is different than it is in the west then you will be surprised to learn a lot about Thais and other Asian cultures.

4. My wifes family gave us a car. (They are Bangkok people, not the up country friends I mentioned). Not sure why but before we bought one they just bought a car and gave it to us. There have been numerous examples of this in our marriage. My income is sufficient to buy the condo we own and cars. They did it as a gesture of kindness.

5. Poor up country families can be very poor. Have you NEVER seen a Thai going home with tons of boxes or have you NEVER heard of a Thai professional working (hooker or MBA grad) and sending money home when their family is very poor?

6. I have had relationships with prostitutes many times, though it was before marriage. And it can be a lot of fun.

[kimbathewhitelion]

Love the Shack life, make's you feel real with nature...a true experience in the adventure of memories. Best to take in for what it is & enjoy it. Being serious.

If it is a problem to you, why not just offer to pay for additional construction to make it more to your liking, after all that's your duty.

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

[Minnehaha]

you gotta buy a boatload of stuff for them, as is standard. I suggest you buy it on the way in, that way you can control the expenditure. I suggest a couple bottles of Laokhao and maybe a couple cases of beer. Maybe a couple super size tins of crackers or cookies for the kids. I would also invest in a styrofoam cooler for the beer.

And I agree with the other posts - quietly book a hotel room nearby and then escape when you can. If it has a swimming pool and you are comfortable with it... you can have the kids over for a swim. They will love it. You can enjoy aircon and maybe just maybe it will have a TV with some sport on. A hotel will have a decent restaurant nearby.

And any day you just gotta get out of there - claim 'tong seeya' (diarrhea). Very believable. And you may not need to fake it.

Maybe if you are an old fossil visiting a hooker's family.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

totally agree, i have never been put in a position when i am expected to buy anything. i have always been a welcomed guest and treated well. then again i've never dated a prostitute...

Same as me.

Last time I spent 5 days in Udon Thani staying with her family and her friend's family. Wasn't asked or expected to pay for anything. Offered multiple times and refused. Thais are very good hosts in my experience.

Yes Thais are very gracious hosts, even the poor.

Offering will put them in a loss of face situation if they accept.

If you dont understand this, then you may wish to re-visit what you know about Thai culture. Or perhaps you dont make enough money. Or the family is not dirt poor. Anyway, the idea is you pay for it out of generosity "not offer to pick up the tab."

Edited March 18, 2014 by Minnehaha

[kimbathewhitelion]

Scratch the "duty" part, now that I read the recent posts. But do enjoy REAL life.

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

[Donnie Brasco]

Fan, mosquito net, mattress pad, reading lite, books, magazines, box of wine, 3 Hundred Pipers, (they'll have soda &ice) stake and rope, envelopes for the !KIDS !, Ibuprofen, your iPad if there's service, clean sheets, pillows.

Water guns (I guess)

Old clothes, T's, jeans, etc,

Leave everything behind when you

go.

Really, What's the problem ?

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[MW72]

you gotta buy a boatload of stuff for them, as is standard. I suggest you buy it on the way in, that way you can control the expenditure. I suggest a couple bottles of Laokhao and maybe a couple cases of beer. Maybe a couple super size tins of crackers or cookies for the kids. I would also invest in a styrofoam cooler for the beer.

And I agree with the other posts - quietly book a hotel room nearby and then escape when you can. If it has a swimming pool and you are comfortable with it... you can have the kids over for a swim. They will love it. You can enjoy aircon and maybe just maybe it will have a TV with some sport on. A hotel will have a decent restaurant nearby.

And any day you just gotta get out of there - claim 'tong seeya' (diarrhea). Very believable. And you may not need to fake it.

Maybe if you are an old fossil visiting a hooker's family.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

totally agree, i have never been put in a position when i am expected to buy anything. i have always been a welcomed guest and treated well. then again i've never dated a prostitute...

Just to be clear to the idiots jumping to conclusions.

1. I am referring to experience visiting very poor farming family of a close friend of my wife's (and mine as well).

2. Neither women is or were hookers

3. If you do not acknowledge that Thais buy gifts for each other and understand this context is different than it is in the west then you will be surprised to learn a lot about Thais and other Asian cultures.

4. My wifes family gave us a car. (They are Bangkok people, not the up country friends I mentioned). Not sure why but before we bought one they just bought a car and gave it to us. There have been numerous examples of this in our marriage. My income is sufficient to buy the condo we own and cars. They did it as a gesture of kindness.

5. Poor up country families can be very poor. Have you NEVER seen a Thai going home with tons of boxes or have you NEVER heard of a Thai professional working (hooker or MBA grad) and sending money home when their family is very poor?

6. I have had relationships with prostitutes many times, though it was before marriage. And it can be a lot of fun.

I work overseas and only get to visit the family a couple of times a year so I always take gifts especially if it is at the time of a very important festival. Does this mean that all the women in my family are hookers? I am talking about my western family who live in Scotland. By some narrow minded peoples views they would all be hookers if it was my Thai family so why not the same for my Scottish family?

[Dap]

no need to stay full-time at the shack

they'll completely understand if you get an A/C room at a place with a pool and drive in to visit for a few hours each day

Gooood call wym.

[wym]

you gotta buy a boatload of stuff for them, as is standard. I suggest you buy it on the way in, that way you can control the expenditure. I suggest a couple bottles of Laokhao and maybe a couple cases of beer. Maybe a couple super size tins of crackers or cookies for the kids. I would also invest in a styrofoam cooler for the beer.

Maybe if you are an old fossil visiting a hooker's family.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

totally agree, i have never been put in a position when i am expected to buy anything. i have always been a welcomed guest and treated well. then again i've never dated a prostitute...

I don't know why you guys feel the need to crow about this issue every time (you think) it comes up.

We old fossils buying prezzies for the SO's poverty-stricken family aren't deserving of your time and energy in mocking us for our choices, give it a rest.

[Clutch]

Songkran up country with mozzies, drunken uncles, squat toilet and no aircon is a piece of p.$$.

It's the 1000km drive getting there and back that I'm afraid of.

[wym]

less of a problem middle of the night

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/711643-staying-at-the-in-laws-in-phrae-at-songkran-hold-me/?p=7576851

[connda]

you gotta buy a boatload of stuff for them, as is standard. I suggest you buy it on the way in, that way you can control the expenditure. I suggest a couple bottles of Laokhao and maybe a couple cases of beer. Maybe a couple super size tins of crackers or cookies for the kids. I would also invest in a styrofoam cooler for the beer.

And I agree with the other posts - quietly book a hotel room nearby and then escape when you can. If it has a swimming pool and you are comfortable with it... you can have the kids over for a swim. They will love it. You can enjoy aircon and maybe just maybe it will have a TV with some sport on. A hotel will have a decent restaurant nearby.

And any day you just gotta get out of there - claim 'tong seeya' (diarrhea). Very believable. And you may not need to fake it.

Maybe if you are an old fossil visiting a hooker's family.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

I've never been asked or expected to buy a boatload of stuff when visiting or staying with Thai families.

And neither have I. I've been asked if I want to go out and drink (which means I buy), but if I say "no", it never goes further.

[connda]

Oh! And talking about 'hookers'. I've paid for sex! They were my "wives" in the US before the divorces. It's a pretty thin line between 500 baht for a HJ on a 'transactional basis' and $500 for a shopping excursion at Nordstrom's. Well, imho. Although, not saying that I've ever paid for a 500 baht HJ on a 'transactional basis'. Just saying I understand what goes on both here and there.

Edited March 18, 2014 by connda