How important is quality sex to you when choosing a partner?

[Tmymaimee]

Obviously some guys couldn't care less while other guys want porn star experiences every night.

For normal guys, could you accept a partner for a long term relationship if she was boring and uninspiring as a lover yet very good in all other aspects of the relationship?

Please, no comments about the guy going to a gym, etc. Let's say for the sake of argument that your former partners were more than satisfied with you while she admits she has never had a sexual interest in herself or any former partners.

What I'm getting at is can a Thai girl make up for her lack of sexual desire by being an excellent partner in all other non sexual aspects of the relationship? Or is this a showstopper and without mind blowing sex, there is little point in continuing?

Yes, I know some guys can take a fresh rice picker and turn her into Ms. Thailand but we're talking about a girl with no sexual drive whatsoever for anyone, regardless of who the partner is, how well he touches her, etc.. And no, there is no abuse history here or past bar work; just a chemical absence of sexual drive.

[Skint]

This is why you should try the goods as soon as possible, who wants to have bird that's a crap ride?

[Seastallion]

I get your point and I'd say that a boring lay can be overlooked if she is perfect in every other way. I mean if you get your end away once or twice a night, that should do.

Having said that, I have found that even a lack of drive on her part is not noticed if you are truly in love, and if she is truly in love she will satisfy you regardless.

[Loptr]

What I'm getting at is can a Thai girl make up for her lack of sexual desire by being an excellent partner in all other non sexual aspects of the relationship?

No, and if you try to convince yourself otherwise you are just lying to yourself. Which is why you asked the question in the first place.

[Beetlejuice]

I like the way the OP makes the woman a Thai just so that this subject is Thai related, but I`ll take the bait anyway.

Depends on the guy. I know guys that sexually, lost their labidos in their early 40s, and others that can still go at it like a jack rabbits in their 70s. But yes, to some, the physical side can be a very important part of a relationship or marriage. Sometimes if one partner loses interest in sex, it can place a strain on the marital relationship and end up with a partner having and affair, going with prostitutes in the case of men, or even in divorce.

[Beetlejuice]

This is why you should try the goods as soon as possible, who wants to have bird that's a crap ride?

They say one should never squeeze the goods until you have paid.

[sdanielmcev]

Nope.

[wolfmanjack]

I would be willing to bet that most people have not had mind blowing sex with anyone let alone their spouse.

I agree with beetlejuice. It depends on the person.

For me i would have to say that even bad sex is better than no sex and no sex at all would be a deal killer.

[maccaroni man]

Tried it in the west and it was a bust did it in Los and it was gone because of the nois

[wym]

The ideal for me is a girl who's eager to please but inexperienced, and has never had a decent lover, has no idea how wonderful sex can be. As an older guy sometimes this creates a demand for frequency that's hard to satisfy but with a bit of chemical help I do try my best.

Girls with lots of skill from experience I have found the negative other baggage overrides no matter how good the sex is.

A total dead fish, perhaps just physically incompatible with me, is definitely a deal breaker, even if she's eager to please, she definitely needs to be able to loosen up and let go, enjoy herself if not over the moon at least have fun.

[JLCrab]

So after sex with you do you then provide value in helping Ms. Eager find her first decent lover?

[wym]

I do help them define and refine their criteria, and that factor seems to very rarely be important. Or if it is, they don't talk about it.

Obviously the final choice is up to them.

[JLCrab]

What a great après line: Hey baby -- let's now define & refine your criteria

[chiang mai]

Your views as to what is quality today is likely to change over time, familiarity and all that, I believe there are other characteristics that are far more important and enduring. Personally, I don't believe that the quality of sex counts for much more than say 5% of the valuation but each to their own.

[Showbags]

^{First comes looks...then comes sex....then personality.}

Edited March 18, 2014 by Showbags

[Ulysses G.]

As long as we are living in Thailand and she does not mind me getting satisfaction elsewhere, it could be the perfect marriage.

Edited March 18, 2014 by Ulysses G.

[i claudius]

When i was young it was about her looks and how good she was in bed ,as i matured i wanted a partner with looks ,good in bed and good conversation as i got old i became satisfied with my wife who is 25 years younger than me ,is great to talk to .nice looking with a nice figure for a woman of her age and is loving.although sex is still good it is not our main thing in life. so in the end its all about maturity.

[FiftyTwo]

My wife in the UK was rubbish at sex. I was with her 30 years.

Even easier in Thailand, wife no good in bed, hookers everywhere.

A wife is for making babies and bringing them up, not good sex.

[rct99q]

My wife in the UK was rubbish at sex. I was with her 30 years.

Even easier in Thailand, wife no good in bed, hookers everywhere.

A wife is for making babies and bringing them up, not good sex.

Are you sure it was the wife that was rubbish at sex......

Ah the good old British house wife.....frumpy, boring, tired all the time......not willing to experiment.....lays on her back reading a book whilst the hubbie huffs and puffs.....what Thai woman would not find this desirable in a Farang 50 years later! Oooppss missed the part about the hookers..

[seajae]

havent you ever heard of teaching them, if they dont know or have never been shown what do you expect. It is pretty easy to do, if you show her how to enjoy it herself and not just jump on and do the busines and jump off leaving her high and dry she will pick it up. Some women just lie there and this totally kills any passion(probably men that do the equivelent), if they get to enjoy it they will adjust they way they react, just try taking your time, talk to her about it and show here exactly how good it can be. When I was young it was just a matter of getting my rocks off but as you grow older and marry you learn that feelings play a big part and start to make sure your partner gets just as much enjoyment as you, maybe with a lot of happy endings she will really take to it.

Edited March 18, 2014 by seajae

[FiftyTwo]

My wife in the UK was rubbish at sex. I was with her 30 years.

Even easier in Thailand, wife no good in bed, hookers everywhere.

A wife is for making babies and bringing them up, not good sex.

Are you sure it was the wife that was rubbish at sex......

Ah the good old British house wife.....frumpy, boring, tired all the time......not willing to experiment.....lays on her back reading a book whilst the hubbie huffs and puffs.....what Thai woman would not find this desirable in a Farang 50 years later! Oooppss missed the part about the hookers..

I'm a marathon runner, sex doesn't involve any heavy breathing on my part.

[Tmymaimee]

havent you ever heard of teaching them, if they dont know or have never been shown what do you expect. It is pretty easy to do, if you show her how to enjoy it herself and not just jump on and do the busines and jump off leaving her high and dry she will pick it up. Some women just lie there and this totally kills any passion(probably men that do the equivelent), if they get to enjoy it they will adjust they way they react, just try taking your time, talk to her about it and show here exactly how good it can be. When I was young it was just a matter of getting my rocks off but as you grow older and marry you learn that feelings play a big part and start to make sure your partner gets just as much enjoyment as you, maybe with a lot of happy endings she will really take to it.

This is my whole point….yes, I could teach her but if the sexual desire for any partner is completely absent on her part, what can teaching accomplish? I only ask this because I genuinely care about her and I need a partner who doesn't make me stray to the bar.

That's a big problem I have in Thailand. I don't put the effort into a relationship that I would back home because I know if she's not willing to put out, I can just buy great sex for 1000 baht.

In this case, she's beautiful and intelligent but she even admits she has a problem with no sex drive and always had the same problem in past relationships.

I don't know if I take time, can she change or is this something set from birth and no amount of time will fix the lack of desire. She said all the time she's alone, not once has she even contemplated touching herself which sort of tells me she just doesn't have the required libido for holding off the bar girls in a long term relationship.

[alanrchase]

So what do you consider quality sex? As "Guns

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[alanrchase]

So what do you consider quality sex? A very nice G n R song suggest it is" tied up tied down and all about the place"

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[Water Buffalo]

Ideally, we all want that partner who is mind-blowing in bed and can take care of all other duties wonderfully. You could try to look for it and be lucky enough to find it.

It is all about perspective too. Sex with the same person over and over again tends to become dull no matter how good they are. And then you just look for the something different to create a new feeling for yourself.

Let's look at the two extremes. Great at all the wife and mother stuff, but poor in bed vs. Great in bed (which inevitably gets dull) and useless at everything else.

I would choose type 1 if i had to. Type 2 would ultimately be more irritating.

Somewhere in between is ideal, unless you are luckiest guy on earth (who never gets bored of the same woman, no matter how good) and you happen to find a woman who excels in both areas.

Anyway, i fear there is no real answer anyway since we were never meant to be monogamous. All evidence points toward us being non-monogamous creatures, like most animals in existence, especially mammals. And the males are almost always the most promiscuous sex, which is how mother nature wanted us to be (to fertilize more females and create more life). Unfortunately, this doesn't fit into our current society and we are seen as perverts.

In my opinion there really is not way out except just try to be satisfied with what you got. Otherwise you gotta cheat on your family with whores, which just sounds awful. I mean, sex with whores is bad even when single. I really don't believe any guy who says he enjoys sex with a rent-doll. It ruins the essence of sex.

[Tmymaimee]

The rent-a-doll sex can be pretty good if you make it appear that there might be a future together and she develops real feelings for you. Then you are no longer the customer but a potential partner (in her thinking anyways) and the sex can be great.

[Water Buffalo]

The rent-a-doll sex can be pretty good if you make it appear that there might be a future together and she develops real feelings for you. Then you are no longer the customer but a potential partner (in her thinking anyways) and the sex can be great.

I wasn't talking about how well she performs.

[kevvy]

when you are really "in love" there is no bad sex with your wife .

[alanrchase]

I will take the bait. Please explain the topic a little 6 more?

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[FiftyTwo]

when you are really "in love" there is no bad sex with your wife .

When you're married, there's hardly any sex at all.