Has anyone ever heard of 5 Million baht sin sod being asked before.

[misterphil]

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You say "Whilst we are madly in love, this is in part to keep her older conservative siblings happy."

Already doomed from the start if you are partly marrying her to keep ger family happy. Shouldnt it be a 100% bond between you and her, nothing to do with her family.

That's where you are wrong misterphil, it has everything to do with her family, she have a 100% bond to her family and 0% bond to her BF Welcome to Thailand!

Maybe in your relationship its like that.

[Dibbler]

A million or multimillion baht sinsod is common for high society weddings. It's all about face but you can negotiate of course, as it's Thailand. If you were planning on buying a house with your wife, then buy the house, and then use the house papers as the sinsot, and make sure the receipts for your payment are in the package so the family can display it for all the guests to see. For extra "face" you can also put some cash and gold in the sinsod but get your wife's family to agree to return that after the wedding ceremony. If your wife's family are well off they should agree to this, but if they are poor they will likely want to keep part or all of the sinsod. Remember in Thailand you marry not just the girl but her family so make sure her relatives are people you can live.

[12DrinkMore]

For 5 million you can wed 10 Thai brides and still have spear change left over...

Or take 5,000 trips to Soi 6, every one guaranteed to be a success and no shopping trip obligations afterwards. Any girl who wants 5,000,000 just to get married is not going to be low maintainance.

Hope you have the 1,000,000 plus each year to keep her in the handbags and shoes she will need.

[bander]

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Highest I am aware of a farang paying is 30 million bht!

Actually a guy in Roi-et paid 1 million! Any sinsod is too much in my opinion. The idea that if they want a Farang THEY adopt our rules . If they want sinsod then marry a Thai. There are plenty of good women here that understand this concept. We marry for love .......they sell their daughters! And folks..there are plenty that disappear after the ceremony !

Agree 100%, well written I have been in a thai wedding where the spouse was thai, he had to borrow gold from all his friends and family to show on the table with also 40.000 in cash (sin sod) After the wedding he returned it all and her family kept they'r face, they now had a rich sun in law

[GOLDBUGGY]

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If 5 million is petty cash for you, then why not? I believe Tata Young's husband paid a lot more.

Mel Gibson paid a lot more than that in US Dollars, but that was for the Divorce.

Wonder what the OP would pay if he pays 5 Million for a Marriage Contract with no assurances of it lasting longer than that day?

[Krataiboy]

In the West, I think it's called a try-on.

[bander]

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You were with her and she got pregnant and now they want money.

Just tell them that you can't marry just now since you don't have enough money. And in your country it is customary that the brides family pays dowry (like in mine).

If their attitudes and especially your future wife's deteriorate, just do what every Thai man would do.

RUN!

Many good advice to this topic, so far this is the best....RUN

[Eloelo]

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Highest I am aware of a farang paying is 30 million bht!

Actually a guy in Roi-et paid 1 million! Any sinsod is too much in my opinion. The idea that if they want a Farang THEY adopt our rules . If they want sinsod then marry a Thai. There are plenty of good women here that understand this concept. We marry for love .......they sell their daughters! And folks..there are plenty that disappear after the ceremony !

Agree 100%, well written I have been in a thai wedding where the spouse was thai, he had to borrow gold from all his friends and family to show on the table with also 40.000 in cash (sin sod) After the wedding he returned it all and her family kept they'r face, they now had a rich sun in law

Don't you lose face when you have to return the sin sot to your friends! all seems a bit silly !

[animatic]

My mother in law apologised for not having pigs to give me as a dowery to go with her daughter.

I paid nothing. But alternately I have helped put in a cement kitchen floor on and old house,

and helped with various parts of a new house, but not the whole thing boom done,

So they can TRY to get the cash out of you, but if you say no, but give her a nest egg,

and buy a home for you both, then your job is done. Retain title, and see that inheritance goes to

the kid via trust after he is 30 years old etc. That way a potentialy drunken brother in law can't think

he 'helps sister by speeding her inheritance' at your expense.

If the family sees the golden goose is too easily fleeced, the fleecing will NEVER stop.

[CTO]

I've seen much more, recently I was best man for a Thai mate, after 10 years finally marrying his girl. Over 12 million Baht at least. I've seen more years ago at another Thai Thai wedding. I gave my wife 2 chickens and 1000 Baht. I have no problem with sin sot

[Zodaka]

I would never date or marry the youngest of a large family. Spoilt rotten by not only her mother but also older siblings. She will be end up being selfish as hell as her crush wears off.

Also a family of 12? Usually only the poor families up country would have such a large family or is she from a broken home with the father having had two wifes and two families? I don't know of any wealthy Bangkok family with so many kids..

[umbanda]

This is so annoying.........Yeah its all well and good to show off huge amounts of sinsod at a wedding whether for real or just for show but the reality of it when a farang is involved is that it sets dangerous precedents..

Once 1 pays then every local village girl wants the same regardless of social standing.

My ex's family asked me for 1,000,000 to marry her and even though yes they were a decent family and she was well educated and in the police it just seemed a crazy amount to ask. Seems 1 mill is the new round figure they all aspire to.

But 5,000,000 wow! that really is a figure you should be wary of, if they really intend to purchase a house with it then make damn sure you have a good lawyer set something up for you for if thing go pear shaped.

If you really cannot afford to lose that money i would advise you to think twice. Speak to your gf, if she really loves you then she should help you with her families demands. If she does not then i would run a mile as it sounds like a setup.

I DO NOT HAVE NOTHING TO QUOTE...I JUST WAS TRYING TO CATCH THE BUG ON MY MONITOR...

Edited April 26, 2014 by umbanda

[bander]

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Don't pay a dime.

She is pregnant...they have no negotiating power.

Threaten to walk away and all demands will evaporate in the hot tropical sun.

Sin sod in this day and age is a racket to milk men....just say no!

On a side note...are you sure she is pregnant or could it be just a ploy?

Check and re-check.

A 30 year old thai woman who's probably had multiple thai boyfriends and still not have offspring sounds fishy, maybe she's not able to have children? Any thai man don't want to marry a woman who needs assisted reproduction that cost at least 300.000 bath here.

Edited April 26, 2014 by bander

[bander]

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Highest I am aware of a farang paying is 30 million bht!


Actually a guy in Roi-et paid 1 million! Any sinsod is too much in my opinion. The idea that if they want a Farang THEY adopt our rules . If they want sinsod then marry a Thai. There are plenty of good women here that understand this concept. We marry for love .......they sell their daughters! And folks..there are plenty that disappear after the ceremony !

Agree 100%, well written src="http://3-ps.googleusercontent.com/x/www.thaivisa.com/static.thaivisa.com/forum//public/style_emoticons/default/clap2.gif.pagespeed.ce.z5euFoXm0J.gif" alt=clap2.gif width=31 height=25> I have been in a thai wedding where the spouse was thai, he had to borrow gold from all his friends and family to show on the table with also 40.000 in cash (sin sod) After the wedding he returned it all and her family kept they'r face, they now had a rich sun in law src="http://3-ps.googleusercontent.com/x/www.thaivisa.com/static.thaivisa.com/forum//public/style_emoticons/default/cheesy.gif.pagespeed.ce.HaOxm9--Zv.gif" alt=cheesy.gif width=32 height=20>

Don't you lose face when you have to return the sin sot to your friends! all seems a bit silly !

Who cares, thai wedding is just a show off, look at us we have money and gold....for 1 day, then it's all returned to the owners, thai wedding is a traditional parody, end of story

[Frank James]

Let me just add that there is no village, they live in bkk.

there are no debts. They are pretty loaded.

They will be more loaded yet if you go for this BS. You must know you're being jacked. If you dont...?

[smotherb]

What, B5M for a pregnant 30 year old?

[smotherb]

Is sinsod part of your culture?

No.

Then refuse outright. If they love you they will stay with you. If they don't, no loss.

The problem I see with sin sod is its inference--too similar to a barfine.

[kennypowers]

It's a lot of money but for middle/upper class Thais it's nothing. There was a Thai-Chinese wedding in the function rooms on top of my apartment block last week - Sin Sod was 20MB. Foreigners generally haven't a clue about sin sod. It's relative to wealth and status, but there's a lot more to it than that, as stipulated here:

http://www.thethailandlife.com/sin-sod

I think you have to come to some compromise on your cultures and perhaps meet in the middle. Show a bit of money for her face but make sure you get it back. If you want to give her family a "gift" that's entirely up to you.

[joshstiles]

heuh heuh....geez I am so dumb....I wonder if I should pay this....duh......just another dumb f-er with a dumb post

[transam]

Let me just add that there is no village, they live in bkk.

there are no debts. They are pretty loaded.

They think you are too as well as perhaps being a mug.................

[asdecas]

Don't be ridiculous. Think with your brain instead.

[transam]

Don't be ridiculous. Think with your brain instead.

Who ?

[brewsterbudgen]

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Is sinsod part of your culture?

No.

Then refuse outright. If they love you they will stay with you. If they don't, no loss.

Why marry a Thai if you have no respect for the culture?

Edited April 26, 2014 by brewsterbudgen

[stephenterry]

Yes, this Sin Sot charade is all about face. Or should be. What worried me was the OP told us that his g/f said to keep her conservative siblings happy - or something similar. That smacks of being an attempt to get plenty of dosh to pay for the upkeep and schooling of the numerous kids that the other 11 have accumulated. Why should number 12 get it all?

[transam]

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Is sinsod part of your culture?

No.

Then refuse outright. If they love you they will stay with you. If they don't, no loss.

Why marry a Thai if you have no respect for the culture?

, do Thai folk respect yours...........?................

[geoman1976]

First off, I have heard of such amounts before. It is usually a nest egg for the bride in case the marriage ever fails. It is probably so high because there is a child involved.

Second, this part of Thai culture in not practiced by the middle and upper class families anymore, for the most part. I am engaged to a beautiful and sweet Thai girl from a prominent family in my area and they actually gave me a house and are building a business for myself and my future wife.

I trust your judgement that your girlfriend is madly in love with you and not a gold digger so I have to assume it is the whole nest egg thing for the wife and child, especially since her father has passed.

Understand you will be seen as the man of the family now and they will come to you when they need and you should help them. All of this provided that it is true love and not some crazy monetary arrangement.

[khunPer]

»Has anyone heard of this amount before?«

Yes, but it sound unusual high. However some farang men end up paying something in that level combined: Sin sod, gold, new house, car, etc. etc…

Sin Sod is a negotiation; often depending of the “girl’s” age, previous relationship (marriage and children), looks etc. – and of the man’s social status (a farang is supposed to high status) and the status of her family. There are several treads about sin sod and pages with explanation and comments.

Hi-so Thais can pay a lot more than 5 million – highest I’ve heard about is 100 million – probably also a question of “face”…

[ben2203]

Let me just add that there is no village, they live in bkk.

there are no debts. They are pretty loaded.

Sounds like they value their daughter, do you have 5 million and do you feel that she is worth it or is it the principle because you are not Thai and don't agree with sindod? You can say you don't agree with sinsod but how they take it is, hmm, well??

Maybe, the other daughters got that so that's why she asked for it, keep up with the jones', ask the other daughter's husbands what they paid perhaps?

[TonyPaul]

Interesting how Thais value life in LOS. A few days ago we had the tragic drowning of two Thai children. The two Thai boatmen who could have saved them but didn’t, were fined 1,000 Bht each. (500 Bht for each child it seems.

The price of a life 500Bht. Kinda makes Sin Sot at any price seem expensive. Aaah but then I must have forgotten about Kreng jai “Face”.

[mrfaroukh]

I think they plan to marry the rest at your cost. To be honest you should not have even post this tread here, think yourself who in Thailand will ever pay 5 million ??? So if I tell you is fine you pay???? They know she is having your baby and now they think because of the baby you pay whatever. Don't get fool.