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My Thai wife wants to pay the offending party


Greg Nixon

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Sadly standards seem to be slipping since the collapse of the British Empire. Now we have the colonials scrapping in the streets of Siam.

I too came on to do the 'handbags at five paces' joke but it seems that's been done to death.

As has my next recommendation to appear with a bottle of malt at his door and have a laugh about the whole situation.

To be fair to the Aussie dude, some hearing aids can cost a few bob nowadays. I SAID, "TO BE FAIR TO THE AUSSIE DUDE .... ah never mind.

Chai yen lads. Move on.

Only the americans managed to break free from the british.

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one canuck to another. Do a recce talk to the neighbors find out what he drinks and take him a bottle. Do not plan on drinking it with him just say that youwould like to bury the hatchet and leave it at that.

BTW you ex military????

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If it happened out in the public road, you are guilty, and may be charged with assault.

If it happened in your garden, you have the right to kill him and get away with it.

In most countries of the world, throwing water at someone would be considered common assault (if it hit them, the more serious crime aggravated assault).

From what you have said, you appear to have admitted guilt all the way along, my advice, pay up or run.

By the way, never try this foolishness on a Thai man, he would likely pull a gun, shoot you dead, and get away with it (on either occasion according to your statements).

I believe incident took place at OP's gate, ie driveway , ie not a public road.

Splashing water does not fall under the assault, wish you luck having this so called assault stick.

You are Thai , so you saying all Thai men carry guns and have brain less than a monkey to shoot someone at their property to then spend good part of their life in jail?

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The OP sounds like a bonehead. Besides no adult man thinking antagonizing another male neighbor with a stream of water is playful diversion, any adult could also have navigated out of this drama. I know you came here for advice so here it is: we give legitimacy to your stage-drama by advising you on the narrow topic/questions you've asked regarding how to manage the "crisis." The real advise you require is about your maturity and problem solving skills.

Besides this issue never needing to happen, once you set in motion the events that would unfold it is absurd to assert the neighbor should behave in any particular way at all; you entered his world and forcefully made him a part of yours. You then protest that... What? He behaved rudely? Aggressively? You invited him into your world!

Sit down, close your eyes, and think; relive the sequence of events and while you do so see another person, off to the side, watching the whole thing too. This is your wife. Are you surprised why she wants to exit the problem? Because you failed to see all the Exit Doors earlier you leave her with few exit doors for her to ask you use now. Context, causation, maturity, and wisdom: this is what you need to manage, not the neighbor.

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I can't believe all the replies to this crap. I thought 2 or 3 responses would have been sufficient. Obviously a boring day & not much else to comment on.

Oh shit... now I've commented on it.

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Canadians and Aussies are very alike. We both live beer, we are two nations that inhabit only 15 % of our countries land space, we travel all over the world and are loved, you see our flags on our backpacks and we both wish we could break away from the British. Make peace with the guy if you can.

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<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

If it happened out in the public road, you are guilty, and may be charged with assault.
If it happened in your garden, you have the right to kill him and get away with it.

In most countries of the world, throwing water at someone would be considered common assault (if it hit them, the more serious crime aggravated assault).
From what you have said, you appear to have admitted guilt all the way along, my advice, pay up or run.

By the way, never try this foolishness on a Thai man, he would likely pull a gun, shoot you dead, and get away with it (on either occasion according to your statements).


I believe incident took place at OP's gate, ie driveway , ie not a public road.

Splashing water does not fall under the assault, wish you luck having this so called assault stick.

You are Thai , so you saying all Thai men carry guns and have brain less than a monkey to shoot someone at their property to then spend good part of their life in jail?

In my experience it's usually the Americans with "Brain less than a monkey" especially if they are from Texas.

Edited by Stradavarius37
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Greg, You sound like decent sort. Forget about it. If you don't have any known problem with hearing...for whatever reason. You will not understand the pain and frustration that may associate with it. During the healing process. Like living in another world at times.
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I know what you mean by him being an angry man. Met many here like that. They would argue with themselves if they could. After enough drinks and nobody else around they probably do. I have seen that before to! But this is besides the point.

A lot of this has to do as to how hurt he is, and age difference. Everyone is allowed to defend themselves using reasonable force, including verbal threats. But if you are a 30 year old body building training for UFC Fights, and he is a 85 year old man who could only get to your place in a walker, reasonable force wouldn't be putting him in the hospital with bruises all over his body and 3 broken ribs and jaw fracture from your punches. Now would it?

Another factor is that he may have been at your gate, but not on your property. Thus you were not forced to listen to him and thus could have just walked away. He was still on public property as the sidewalk would be, and thus he has the right to be there. So since you did not walk away, the first aggressive action was you opening the gate even if he made verbal threats.

He may have said he is going to set you on your ass, but again, if he is 85 years old and in a wheel chair, it would be difficult to convince me or anyone that you were afraid of that. You seemed more annoyed about that then afraid. Maybe you should have just walked away and let him blow some steam and nothing more would have happened. It is not being a Chicken to walk away from a man you know you can beat with one hand tied behind your back. It is being smart and trying to stay out of the trouble you are in now. .

Even the thought from you of going back to Canada tells me you may be worried a little that he may have criminal charges filed against you, or the police. If you don't feel he has a case with your lawyers advice then you have no reason to return or pay him anything. If you feel he does then going home seems better to me than a Thai Prison for even a night or two.

However if you feel you are equally to blame then offering to pay half of his hospital bill may be a good jester and relax the situation a bit. I would not approach him later with beer and sit and drink with him. It can only lead to one direction once the beers are gone. Leave him alone and tell him to do the same, unless you see some real changes in him and you. .

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The OP claims he sprayed water in the guy's direction but didn't hit him. Maybe not good judgment, but not worth the neighbor threatening to assault him later at the OP's own home.

Come to my house and threaten to knock me on my ass and see what happens to you.

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I do not envy you. Your lack of knowledge about these things will only direct you into a worse situation and lay you wide open for getting fleeced out of more money than this is worth, and it is worth nothing.

Not knowing how to handle these kind of things and trying to act out the solutions on other people's advice will only add insincerity and lack of confidence to your attempts to put out the fires. Additionally, if any attempt takes a a turn that you did not get advice on, you will fall flat on your face and he'll eat you for lunch

Why in hell you sprayed water at him, though, really has me wondering about your character and the relationship between you two before this all happened. It really makes me wonder more about you, to be truthful.

I mean; you sound a bit immature.

Edited by cup-O-coffee
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<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

If it happened out in the public road, you are guilty, and may be charged with assault.

If it happened in your garden, you have the right to kill him and get away with it.

In most countries of the world, throwing water at someone would be considered common assault (if it hit them, the more serious crime aggravated assault).

From what you have said, you appear to have admitted guilt all the way along, my advice, pay up or run.

By the way, never try this foolishness on a Thai man, he would likely pull a gun, shoot you dead, and get away with it (on either occasion according to your statements).

I believe incident took place at OP's gate, ie driveway , ie not a public road.

Splashing water does not fall under the assault, wish you luck having this so called assault stick.

You are Thai , so you saying all Thai men carry guns and have brain less than a monkey to shoot someone at their property to then spend good part of their life in jail?

In my experience it's usually the Americans with "Brain less than a monkey" especially if they are from Texas.

AnotheroneAmerican is actually really a Thai, he has confirmed it on one of the threads

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Cummon guys,,, so the OP has a playful nature,, spritsts water in the guys direction,, as a, "hey,, what's up?",, he already stated,, it fell well short of the arsewhole,,, OK,, the old guy takes offenses,, says his piece/threat,, OP says,, wow,, sorry mate,,, DONE DEAL,, OVER,, FINISHED,,, but for the guy to come, BACK,, reiterate his THREAT, another 2 times?,,, ya. He's LOOKING for trouble,, BET the wife berates him on a daily basis,, and feels the, "need", to mouth off to someone, ANYONE,, over NOTHING, bet he pulls the SAME sheet, at the local market when someone steps on front of him,,, OP,, 1, you're,,CRAZY to pay a single baht,, 2,, DOUBLE CRAZY to even consider leaving because of this, ARSEWHOLE,, leave it lay,, ignore him,, you've already make it clear,, without actual violence,, that you're no push over,, he'll stay clear is my guess,, HE may even realize his error, and say,, "sorry mate ", (sound's like he could use a friend ),,, if so?, ya, share a beer,, laugh about it,,, ands Yes,,, I'd be a bit peeved also, if my girl actually took his side,, not really a, "bootable " offence,, just a bit pissed but hey,,, IGNORE THE ARSE!

What a poor post. I feel sorry for you.

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The OP sounds like a bonehead. Besides no adult man thinking antagonizing another male neighbor with a stream of water is playful diversion, any adult could also have navigated out of this drama. I know you came here for advice so here it is: we give legitimacy to your stage-drama by advising you on the narrow topic/questions you've asked regarding how to manage the "crisis." The real advise you require is about your maturity and problem solving skills.

Besides this issue never needing to happen, once you set in motion the events that would unfold it is absurd to assert the neighbor should behave in any particular way at all; you entered his world and forcefully made him a part of yours. You then protest that... What? He behaved rudely? Aggressively? You invited him into your world!

Sit down, close your eyes, and think; relive the sequence of events and while you do so see another person, off to the side, watching the whole thing too. This is your wife. Are you surprised why she wants to exit the problem? Because you failed to see all the Exit Doors earlier you leave her with few exit doors for her to ask you use now. Context, causation, maturity, and wisdom: this is what you need to manage, not the neighbor.

Yes,, a, "true" adult,,, should NEVER,, EVER attempt to have ANY FUN,, with his fellow man,,, TRY and start a convo,,, HEAVEN FORBID!,,, , should be all,,, " &lt;deleted&gt; you, ya &lt;deleted&gt; you too",,, what a bunch of sad &lt;deleted&gt;,,,,,

Sent from my GT-I9300 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

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My friends and I play subtle pranks on each other perpetually (eg, a quick 'accidental' squirt with the hose), sometimes have to remind myself that comfort level doesn't exist with folks I don't know so well. So be it. You learn.

But if the story represented is factual, him threatening to put you on your ass changed the tenor of the exchange significantly - I would probably rather claw out my eyes with a spork rather than pay off someone who threatened me under those circumstances. It's definitely a red flag to get that kind of threat.

My input - knowing only this part of the story - is don't pay anything but don't do anything else to increase hostility either. Consider it a lesson on human behavior and give him wide berth.

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Why spray water at him?

If someone was being a smart ass spraying me I would not like it. Neither would you.

Sent from my c64

Edited by wow64
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From one fellow Canadian to another, if this was back in Canada, I'd say that buddy could go stuff a stubby beer bottle where the sun don't shine. I just recently went through a similar situation and thought nothing would come of it. Wrong, first thing you have to understand that the legal system here is down right f--ked! Sorry but it's the hard and old truth. Remember lying is excepted and encouraged here. It sounds like this Aussie a-hole is setting you up. Hard to believe, but that is what he trying to do. By the fact that you pushed him down the street he can now lie his way down to the court house. My guy did! Yes your blood is boiling by now as mine is just thinking about this jerk Aussie and the jerk I dealt with. If you like I would be happy to offer what I did and how you may be able to turn this around. Private message me and I will give my number in Phuket.

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If it happened out in the public road, you are guilty, and may be charged with assault.

If it happened in your garden, you have the right to kill him and get away with it.

In most countries of the world, throwing water at someone would be considered common assault (if it hit them, the more serious crime aggravated assault).

From what you have said, you appear to have admitted guilt all the way along, my advice, pay up or run.

By the way, never try this foolishness on a Thai man, he would likely pull a gun, shoot you dead, and get away with it (on either occasion according to your statements).

I believe incident took place at OP's gate, ie driveway , ie not a public road.

Splashing water does not fall under the assault, wish you luck having this so called assault stick.

You are Thai , so you saying all Thai men carry guns and have brain less than a monkey to shoot someone at their property to then spend good part of their life in jail?

In my experience it's usually the Americans with "Brain less than a monkey" especially if they are from Texas.

AnotheroneAmerican is actually really a Thai, he has confirmed it on one of the threads

Yes I know. Comment stands.

Sent from my iPhone using ThaiVisa app

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I believe incident took place at OP's gate, ie driveway , ie not a public road.

Splashing water does not fall under the assault, wish you luck having this so called assault stick.

You are Thai , so you saying all Thai men carry guns and have brain less than a monkey to shoot someone at their property to then spend good part of their life in jail?

In my experience it's usually the Americans with "Brain less than a monkey" especially if they are from Texas.

And this has what to do with the OP? FYI there are at least 3x as many gun murders per capita in Thailand as there are in the US. Some say 10x. Thais are violent. I've posted the links to those statistics so many times that I won't do it again for the ignorant.

America bashing is a lot of fun on this forum and is allowed for some reason. I presume you're a chicken shit Brit hiding behind a keyboard?

You assumed wrong, and made an ass out of yourself as a result. (Yet surprisingly, I remain ass-free ;)

Sent from my iPhone using ThaiVisa app

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OP, no offense but what age are you? And what age is the Aussie?

By your own admission, you took the aggressive stance (through provocation) and told him you were going to put him on his ass as you opened your gate. Him grabbing you could be seen as defensive especially as you ended up pushing him to the ground.

But anyway, apart from the above, no, you shouldn't be paying anything, as long as he isn't pressing charges. Wait until he is out of hospital and bring a couple of cold ones round to his property as a peace offering and sort it out like adults normally do when trivial matters get out of hand.

If the olive branch approach isn't in your capability, then yes, maybe you should be looking at Canada.

IMHO of course.....................wink.png

.

…or a few thousand baht.

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The neighbour seems to have anger management issues and you appear to have common sense issues. I think you should go back to Canada and he should go back to Australia. At least it would put more distance between you.wink.png

And the rest of us.

For Gawd's sake, I left England to get away from neighbours like you.

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I suggest you take this opportunity to redeem the despicable reputation of all farangs by handling it in the appropriate upcountry Thai way.

Pay a pittance, not to the old POS, his wife, or the hospital he went larking off to because he doesn't have aircon, but to some local thug. Have him go into the POS's residence in the middle of the night and ransack the place, taking nothing. Then go to the bedroom and knock the Butt-Head on the floor, winkle out his hearing aid, and smash it to bits.

After that there will be no reason not to spray him with water. Do so at the earliest opportunity and then hand him one of those ear cones they used in the 19th century. If he's not apoplectic after all that, rinse and repeat.

Edited by BanTamo
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The Canadian inferiority complex is well known - they hate the fact they are ersatz Americans.

But when I lived there I found them well balanced about it - a chip on both shoulders.

I just hated they thought my accent was Irish.

If one doesn't have a sense of humour - don't live in LOS - both of you.

Yes we hate the fact that people can't understand that Canadians aren't Americans. We just share a border.

But they are.

Should be a comp to find an exclusive name for 'mericans.'

Doubt that 'Seppo' would travel well.

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