Benmart Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 I know two gents in their middle 70s, both of whom suffered life-threatening medical conditions. Both of their ladies nursed them after release from long periods of Intensive Care. There isn't much money left after these unfortunate illnesses and it's heartwarming to see true devotion and love. I hope that others find the same should they ever travel down the same path. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 (edited) didn't read any of the replies. but ... if your tough times are caused by thai people/rules/customs, your thai gf/wife WILL not object them... period. period.... Your talkin crap.Next time try reading the thread. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Edited May 18, 2014 by irlguy1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 why would you think they would all act the same? file under: brainwashing... as long as u can not accept that thai people think totally different than farang, u have no idea what u're doing there. i'm NOT saying they think stupid... i say they think *all* very similar similar (uniform) due to education/brainwashing/etc.... no need to call me racist or "generalising" or bitter, i know what i'm saying. and i love thai people but would NEVER rely on them in case of an issue.... never ever. this very mentality makes my stay in thailand very UN-frustrating, UN-stressy, UN-disappointed. oh and many people in the world are identical, i lived in Africa, N-Africa, Balkan, .... they will also take sides with their own people, always, or stay out of taking sides when you are having an issue. I know exactly what I do in thailand and have been doing so for many years. you ARE generalizing and obviously spend time with a certain type good for you. i know what i say and it's based on OBJECTIVE research. i don't spend time with a certain type since: 1/ i move all the time (been living all-over the south and the centre & north, never isaan sofar) 2/ i have no wife/family there (keeping me inside a certain scene) anyway, i'm not here to convince you, at all. we will talk again whenever u have an issue, the type of issue i'm refering to. many of my 20years+ LOYAL thai friends will help me whenever needed BUT when the issue is too "delicate" they will NOT. thai know very well how far they can/are willing to go. which is perfectly ok for me as i don't expect them to help me. peace. You have no wife or family and you move all the time.... YOU HAVE NO CLUE THEN DO YOU. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benalibina Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 didn't read any of the replies. but ... if your tough times are caused by thai people/rules/customs, your thai gf/wife WILL not object them... period. period.... Your talkin crap.Next time try reading the thread. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk He was referring to the thread. Loyalty.....read his comment again. Unfortunately i have to agree with what he states. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benalibina Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 why would you think they would all act the same? file under: brainwashing... as long as u can not accept that thai people think totally different than farang, u have no idea what u're doing there. i'm NOT saying they think stupid... i say they think *all* very similar similar (uniform) due to education/brainwashing/etc.... no need to call me racist or "generalising" or bitter, i know what i'm saying. and i love thai people but would NEVER rely on them in case of an issue.... never ever. this very mentality makes my stay in thailand very UN-frustrating, UN-stressy, UN-disappointed. oh and many people in the world are identical, i lived in Africa, N-Africa, Balkan, .... they will also take sides with their own people, always, or stay out of taking sides when you are having an issue. I know exactly what I do in thailand and have been doing so for many years. you ARE generalizing and obviously spend time with a certain type good for you. i know what i say and it's based on OBJECTIVE research. i don't spend time with a certain type since: 1/ i move all the time (been living all-over the south and the centre & north, never isaan sofar) 2/ i have no wife/family there (keeping me inside a certain scene) anyway, i'm not here to convince you, at all. we will talk again whenever u have an issue, the type of issue i'm refering to. many of my 20years+ LOYAL thai friends will help me whenever needed BUT when the issue is too "delicate" they will NOT. thai know very well how far they can/are willing to go. which is perfectly ok for me as i don't expect them to help me. peace. You have no wife or family and you move all the time.... YOU HAVE NO CLUE THEN DO YOU. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk He is wise maybe....again i concur with his observations. Maybe u are lucky or have not been in real problems here, culture related. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AYJAYDEE Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 why would you think they would all act the same? file under: brainwashing... as long as u can not accept that thai people think totally different than farang, u have no idea what u're doing there. i'm NOT saying they think stupid... i say they think *all* very similar similar (uniform) due to education/brainwashing/etc.... no need to call me racist or "generalising" or bitter, i know what i'm saying. and i love thai people but would NEVER rely on them in case of an issue.... never ever. this very mentality makes my stay in thailand very UN-frustrating, UN-stressy, UN-disappointed. oh and many people in the world are identical, i lived in Africa, N-Africa, Balkan, .... they will also take sides with their own people, always, or stay out of taking sides when you are having an issue. I know exactly what I do in thailand and have been doing so for many years. you ARE generalizing and obviously spend time with a certain type good for you. i know what i say and it's based on OBJECTIVE research. i don't spend time with a certain type since: 1/ i move all the time (been living all-over the south and the centre & north, never isaan sofar) 2/ i have no wife/family there (keeping me inside a certain scene) anyway, i'm not here to convince you, at all. we will talk again whenever u have an issue, the type of issue i'm refering to. many of my 20years+ LOYAL thai friends will help me whenever needed BUT when the issue is too "delicate" they will NOT. thai know very well how far they can/are willing to go. which is perfectly ok for me as i don't expect them to help me. peace. You have no wife or family and you move all the time.... YOU HAVE NO CLUE THEN DO YOU. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk He is wise maybe....again i concur with his observations. Maybe u are lucky or have not been in real problems here, culture related. its the exact opposite. either he (and you?) has been unlucky or he makes his own problems 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The byaMemo Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 One thing in the west is of way lesser significance than in Thailand. The influence of the family on your partner. In the west, in general, it is partner 1st (own choice) and then family. Here it is, in general, family 1st, blood, then partner. i think you missed quite a few in the thai lineup lets just say, the father the son and the holy ghost that 2 plus a few million, then there is the whole police force thats a million or two then there is the tuk tuk mafia, then most govt employers both local and national then after that you might get a look in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarpolo Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 No man should marry a woman if he thinks along the line their maybe a possible chance that she'll leave in circumstances like the OP. Too many Farang men get married early that are still in the 'glamour' stage of the relationship. stay together with your significant other 5 yrs prior to marriage, and you will know if she will stick around until 'death do us part'. TRUE faithfulness - loyalty - Love are characteristics only few possess 6 montths is long enough, marriage past 40, is a mistake. period. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 why would you think they would all act the same? file under: brainwashing... as long as u can not accept that thai people think totally different than farang, u have no idea what u're doing there. i'm NOT saying they think stupid... i say they think *all* very similar similar (uniform) due to education/brainwashing/etc.... no need to call me racist or "generalising" or bitter, i know what i'm saying. and i love thai people but would NEVER rely on them in case of an issue.... never ever. this very mentality makes my stay in thailand very UN-frustrating, UN-stressy, UN-disappointed. oh and many people in the world are identical, i lived in Africa, N-Africa, Balkan, .... they will also take sides with their own people, always, or stay out of taking sides when you are having an issue. I know exactly what I do in thailand and have been doing so for many years. you ARE generalizing and obviously spend time with a certain type good for you. i know what i say and it's based on OBJECTIVE research. i don't spend time with a certain type since: 1/ i move all the time (been living all-over the south and the centre & north, never isaan sofar) 2/ i have no wife/family there (keeping me inside a certain scene) anyway, i'm not here to convince you, at all. we will talk again whenever u have an issue, the type of issue i'm refering to. many of my 20years+ LOYAL thai friends will help me whenever needed BUT when the issue is too "delicate" they will NOT. thai know very well how far they can/are willing to go. which is perfectly ok for me as i don't expect them to help me. peace. You have no wife or family and you move all the time.... YOU HAVE NO CLUE THEN DO YOU. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk He is wise maybe....again i concur with his observations. Maybe u are lucky or have not been in real problems here, culture related. If he had never been married to a Thai and always travels then how the hell would he have any real clue about them? It appears you are as clueless as him Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AYJAYDEE Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 No man should marry a woman if he thinks along the line their maybe a possible chance that she'll leave in circumstances like the OP. Too many Farang men get married early that are still in the 'glamour' stage of the relationship. stay together with your significant other 5 yrs prior to marriage, and you will know if she will stick around until 'death do us part'. TRUE faithfulness - loyalty - Love are characteristics only few possess 6 montths is long enough, marriage past 40, is a mistake. period. speak for yourself. mine went very well 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 didn't read any of the replies. but ... if your tough times are caused by thai people/rules/customs, your thai gf/wife WILL not object them... period. period.... Your talkin crap.Next time try reading the thread. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk He was referring to the thread. Loyalty.....read his comment again. Unfortunately i have to agree with what he states. He said he didn't read any of the replies. It appears you didn't either Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benalibina Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 One thing in the west is of way lesser significance than in Thailand. The influence of the family on your partner. In the west, in general, it is partner 1st (own choice) and then family. Here it is, in general, family 1st, blood, then partner.i think you missed quite a few in the thai lineup lets just say, the father the son and the holy ghost that 2 plus a few million, then there is the whole police force thats a million or two then there is the tuk tuk mafia, then most govt employers both local and national then after that you might get a look in. Didnt want to put ik like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarpolo Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 One thing in the west is of way lesser significance than in Thailand. The influence of the family on your partner. In the west, in general, it is partner 1st (own choice) and then family. Here it is, in general, family 1st, blood, then partner.i think you missed quite a few in the thai lineup lets just say, the father the son and the holy ghost that 2 plus a few million, then there is the whole police force thats a million or two then there is the tuk tuk mafia, then most govt employers both local and national then after that you might get a look in. Didnt want to put ik like that. not sure what all that means. the girl I knew was from the north, all she talked about was, mom, mom, mom, if mom gets old, if mom gets sick, I want my family happy, goodbye was my reply this is their culture, to marry in to that? insanity Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benalibina Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 why would you think they would all act the same? file under: brainwashing... as long as u can not accept that thai people think totally different than farang, u have no idea what u're doing there. i'm NOT saying they think stupid... i say they think *all* very similar similar (uniform) due to education/brainwashing/etc.... no need to call me racist or "generalising" or bitter, i know what i'm saying. and i love thai people but would NEVER rely on them in case of an issue.... never ever. this very mentality makes my stay in thailand very UN-frustrating, UN-stressy, UN-disappointed. oh and many people in the world are identical, i lived in Africa, N-Africa, Balkan, .... they will also take sides with their own people, always, or stay out of taking sides when you are having an issue. I know exactly what I do in thailand and have been doing so for many years. you ARE generalizing and obviously spend time with a certain type good for you. i know what i say and it's based on OBJECTIVE research. i don't spend time with a certain type since: 1/ i move all the time (been living all-over the south and the centre & north, never isaan sofar) 2/ i have no wife/family there (keeping me inside a certain scene) anyway, i'm not here to convince you, at all. we will talk again whenever u have an issue, the type of issue i'm refering to. many of my 20years+ LOYAL thai friends will help me whenever needed BUT when the issue is too "delicate" they will NOT. thai know very well how far they can/are willing to go. which is perfectly ok for me as i don't expect them to help me. peace. You have no wife or family and you move all the time.... YOU HAVE NO CLUE THEN DO YOU. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk He is wise maybe....again i concur with his observations. Maybe u are lucky or have not been in real problems here, culture related. If he had never been married to a Thai and always travels then how the hell would he have any real clue about them? It appears you are as clueless as him Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Clueless....funny man/woman.....living it. Be happy that you are ignorant about it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 I can say definitely yes. Many Thai ladies have stood by me during hard times. Same. Early morning is my favourite hard time. ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arthurwait Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 Part of the reason I ask is I see and hear many ladies when their dad is sick or something happens, they quit their jobs, even dump their current bf and look for a local husband and go back home to look after them. And was wondering if their husband (faring or not) would get the same treatment The latest example I heard was a friends sister, she is middle to upper class girl who,s father had a stroke , dumped her fairly rich Thai bf, quit her job, and went and married a local Thai man who is apparently poor, all in a period of 6 months and moved back home town to look after him (mother is still alive and healthy too!) I was mighty impressed but was surprised how quickly she got married, I don't understand the point of this example. Are you saying she left a rich guy for a poor guy and this isn't standing by your man ? I also can't see a potentially upper class girl marrying a poor local Thai man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarpolo Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 Part of the reason I ask is I see and hear many ladies when their dad is sick or something happens, they quit their jobs, even dump their current bf and look for a local husband and go back home to look after them. And was wondering if their husband (faring or not) would get the same treatment The latest example I heard was a friends sister, she is middle to upper class girl who,s father had a stroke , dumped her fairly rich Thai bf, quit her job, and went and married a local Thai man who is apparently poor, all in a period of 6 months and moved back home town to look after him (mother is still alive and healthy too!) I was mighty impressed but was surprised how quickly she got married, I don't understand the point of this example. Are you saying she left a rich guy for a poor guy and this isn't standing by your man ? I also can't see a potentially upper class girl marrying a poor local Thai man. probably dumped the white guy for the high school sweet (talker) she'll be sorry, the white guy was lucky it happened before she broke him completely 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarpolo Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 Part of the reason I ask is I see and hear many ladies when their dad is sick or something happens, they quit their jobs, even dump their current bf and look for a local husband and go back home to look after them. And was wondering if their husband (faring or not) would get the same treatment The latest example I heard was a friends sister, she is middle to upper class girl who,s father had a stroke , dumped her fairly rich Thai bf, quit her job, and went and married a local Thai man who is apparently poor, all in a period of 6 months and moved back home town to look after him (mother is still alive and healthy too!) I was mighty impressed but was surprised how quickly she got married, I don't understand the point of this example. Are you saying she left a rich guy for a poor guy and this isn't standing by your man ? I also can't see a potentially upper class girl marrying a poor local Thai man. upper class? thats a joke, right? why would anyone assume the leaving the farange for the "poor" boyfriend, was spontaneous? is there a word between naive and dense? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 (edited) Clueless....funny man/woman.....living it. Be happy that you are ignorant about it. No idea what language your speaking but ignorant is something I am not. I am married to a Thai and I know plenty about the family system. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Edited May 18, 2014 by irlguy1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarpolo Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 Clueless....funny man/woman.....living it. Be happy that you are ignorant about it. No idea what language your speaking but ignorant is something I am not. I am married to a Thai and I know plenty about the family system. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk not sure what the reference is too, some are more brainwashed than others 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benalibina Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 Clueless....funny man/woman.....living it. Be happy that you are ignorant about it. No idea what language your speaking but ignorant is something I am not. I am married to a Thai and I know plenty about the family system. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Tinglish ?? Me too.....and i see, in my case, what the thai familysystem brings. Nothing but nothing good.....not happy to write this but no other conclusion possible. Poster...Stickylies.....is correct...at least what i am dealing with. Again i dont generalise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AYJAYDEE Posted May 18, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted May 18, 2014 Clueless....funny man/woman.....living it. Be happy that you are ignorant about it. No idea what language your speaking but ignorant is something I am not. I am married to a Thai and I know plenty about the family system. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Tinglish ?? Me too.....and i see, in my case, what the thai familysystem brings. Nothing but nothing good.....not happy to write this but no other conclusion possible. Poster...Stickylies.....is correct...at least what i am dealing with. Again i dont generalise. just because you managed to marry into a family that brings nothing good is not reason to generalize about thai society. many of us have had exactly the opposite experience. and you DO generalize 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorgal Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 (edited) Depends for me on the type of man she follows...in whatever kind of relationship... Is HE really worth to stand with and resist through tough times for HER ? Or do you expect a blind commitment from her ? You should look it from another perspective... Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand Edited May 18, 2014 by Thorgal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irlguy1 Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 Clueless....funny man/woman.....living it. Be happy that you are ignorant about it. No idea what language your speaking but ignorant is something I am not. I am married to a Thai and I know plenty about the family system. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Tinglish ?? Me too.....and i see, in my case, what the thai familysystem brings. Nothing but nothing good.....not happy to write this but no other conclusion possible. Poster...Stickylies.....is correct...at least what i am dealing with. Again i dont generalise. Of course your generalising if you apply your relationship to every other one. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Desert Rat Posted May 18, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted May 18, 2014 I can only speak from personal experience.Having met my wife in the U.S.,our situation is different from the typical farang/Thai marriage.We married based on compatibility and love.More than once when my own family turned their back on me,she has been there 100%.And I for her.When family health issues called for her to return to Thailand,I had no problem with it.And even though we`re not together year round as a result,we are still completely devoted to each other.She has been without any doubt,the best part of my life. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benalibina Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 Clueless....funny man/woman.....living it. Be happy that you are ignorant about it. No idea what language your speaking but ignorant is something I am not. I am married to a Thai and I know plenty about the family system. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Tinglish ?? Me too.....and i see, in my case, what the thai familysystem brings. Nothing but nothing good.....not happy to write this but no other conclusion possible. Poster...Stickylies.....is correct...at least what i am dealing with. Again i dont generalise. just because you managed to marry into a family that brings nothing good is not reason to generalize about thai society. many of us have had exactly the opposite experience. and you DO generalize No, i dont generalise....stickylies made a comment. I concur with it, cause its my personal experience. This topic was about loyalty...right ? If others have different, good, experiences, i happy for them. I wished that i would be 1 of them. I am not...and that saddens me to write. So if my experiences and others on the same side of the coin can help members to be aware, i have done my job. Stickylies post, i guess, was meant to be like that as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cnx37 Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 We are busy little posters, aren't we? Naturally, we relate OUR personal experiences (or those of a friend, relative or neighbour or all of). Where else would we obtain our experience? Some of us are "lucky" ......some of us are "unlucky". Secondly, back home, we all have a perfect track record. We still "bark" on the "mine is better than yours principle" - not smart! I relate to something I heard many years ago. How do you spell "LOVE"? Answer: "WORK"! (both 4 letter words) Relationships statistics may have some correlation with - race religion age difference family background education desire to "make it work" ie hang in there common goals society "standards" not excessive booze God, Buddha honesty fidelity LUCK etc etc etc OK - a whole bunch of stuff! In my home country, my track record was woeful! Two marriages, unknown number of "live-ins", one night stands - too many to mention - why? Next - visit LOS. Short-term - a lot of "playing" - thankfully. Met a very "nice" girl. Within 2 days, we were cohabitating. 5 star sex! It lasted about 2 years! Good memories! We broke up. Whose fault - it does not matter. Then, I met another. Yes, against the "odds" - much younger than me; rural lass etc. BINGO! SUCCESS! WHY? A little luck; determination; "real love" (whatever that is); some $$$. 10+ years now! In the West, I heard that many marital breakups resulted from $$$ problems - yes, one reason (amongst others). I am NOT filled with glee when I hear about an "unsuccessful" relationship in LOS. But, it does teach me something! "COUNT MY BLESSINGS" - appreciate what I have. (I am in AA & endeavour to practise the principles in all my affairs. I also endeavour to practise Buddhist principles). To all who post or just read this topic, I wish you luck - whatever that is. If my partner & I busted up, would I give it another "crack"? YES. YES & YES! LONELINESS KILLS! I cannot afford hate, bitterness, resentment! (I still have some). 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geordie Boy Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 I had a friend who lived not far away from me who was never rich to start with but his Thai wife never complained. He then got health complications and most of his savings went on Hospital treatment, he ended up having both his legs removed from the knees down. His wife pushed him everywhere in a wheelchair and generally cared for him alone at home with virtually no help until he died last year. In my eyes she was a real hero and i am very happy that she is now involved with a much better off Farang that will hopefully look after her well. God Bless her good luck to the lady in her feature 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hellohello123 Posted May 18, 2014 Author Share Posted May 18, 2014 I can only speak from personal experience.Having met my wife in the U.S.,our situation is different from the typical farang/Thai marriage.We married based on compatibility and love.More than once when my own family turned their back on me,she has been there 100%.And I for her.When family health issues called for her to return to Thailand,I had no problem with it.And even though we`re not together year round as a result,we are still completely devoted to each other.She has been without any doubt,the best part of my life. may I ask, what sort of time she spends away? and is it a permanent arrangement? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sustento Posted May 18, 2014 Share Posted May 18, 2014 I have two Thai friends who are brothers. One has been married for 32 years the other 28 years. Does that count? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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