Darwin Party

[bwana1952]

A rich man living in Darwin decided that he wanted to throw a party and invited all of his buddies and neighbours. He also invited Jimmy, the only Aboriginal in the neighbourhood. He held the party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion.

Everyone was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating prawns, oysters and BBQ and flirting. At the height of the party, the host said, "I have a 15ft man-eating crocodile in my pool and I'll give a million dollars to anyone who has the balls to jump in."

The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash and everyone turned around and saw Jimmy in the pool! Jimmy was fighting the croc and kicking its ass! Jimmy was jabbing the croc in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, doing all kinds of moves, like head butts and chokeholds, biting the croc on the tail and flipping the croc through the air like some kind of Judo Instructor. The water was churning and splashing everywhere. Both Jimmy and the croc were screaming and raising hel_l. Finally Jimmy strangled the croc and let it float to the top like a K-mart goldfish. Jimmy then slowly climbed out of the pool. Everybody was just staring at him in disbelief. Finally the host says, "Well, Jimmy, I reckon I owe you a million dollars."

"Nah, you all right, I don't want it," said Jimmy.

The rich man said, "Man, I have to give you something. You won the bet. How about half a million bucks then?"

"No thanks. I don't want it," answered Jimmy.

The host said, "Come on, I insist on giving you something. That was amazing. How about a new Porsche and a Rolex and some stock options?"

Again Jimmy said no. Confused, the rich man asked, "Well Jimmy, then what do you want?"

Jimmy said, "I want the name of the bastard who pushed me in the pool."

[suegha]

I heard it before in a different format - still makes me laugh!

[stumonster]

reminded me of another aboriginal joke.

Jimmy the black tracker was sitting out at his campfire having a couple of beers when the local police sergeant pulled up inn his landcruiser.

He came up and told jimmy that jimmy's mother in law had gone walkabout and had not been seen for 2 weeks and they were worried as to whether she was ok , and asked for jimmy to come and help track her down.

jimmy told him to piss off as he did not care much for the wife's mother and he was happy to sit where he was and have a few more beers.

well the copper told him to get in the truck or he would pull him for a couple of outstanding warrants and park jimmys arse in the watchhouse.

so jimmy got into the truck and they headed off to where she had been last seen.

Jimmy followed the MIL's tracks through the next day and at sundown came to a mangrove creek called the copper over and pointed to where a foot could be seen poking out of the water's edge and told the sergeant that she was over there lying in the creek.

the copper sent a couple of his men over to pull her out.

a couple of minutes later one of the blokes came back and told the sergeant that they had pulled her out , and she was dead , but there where 10 large mud crabs hanging off of her.

the copper turned to jimmy and said ' what do you think we should do , jimmy'

and he said - " well , you have 5 and I will have 5 and then put her back in "